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Is this a mean thing to do on Christmas Day?

772 replies

AFewScrewsLucy · 10/12/2022 19:09

Imagine you are the parent here.

You have a 9 yo, who turned 9 in early October.
They still believe in father Christmas (yes, really)
They have asked for an iPad.
You've told 9yo you can't afford it, so can't have it.
9yo says "it's OK, Santa will get it for me" and then proceeds to tell everyone they know since November that they're getting an iPad for Christmas.
You are actually buying the iPad for them.
But, you have decided that to teach them to be more humble, you're going to pretend that Santa hasn't brought the iPAD when you all open presents in the morning. And you're going to "find" the iPad at the back of the tree at some point in the evening,.and give it to them then.

Full context, you also have a just turned 6yo and 7yo who will be receiving their Santa present in the morning. (Barbie Dream House and Switch)

What do you think? Mean? Or fine?

OP posts:

Hollywolly1 · 10/12/2022 19:47

Grow up parent and allow the child to enjoy santa claus!!!!!!so so so meeeean


PinkPanther50 · 10/12/2022 19:47

Do it. Then watch the 9 year old have a meltdown. Then parents will shout at ungrateful child. Lunch will be forgotten and get ruined. Disaster of a day 😂 Poor child.


Togoodtobeforgotten · 10/12/2022 19:47

Really mean. Why on earth would you even think this?


StarbucksSmarterSister · 10/12/2022 19:47



DrMarciaFieldstone · 10/12/2022 19:48

Pointless. If you’re going to give them it at the end of the day anyway, how has that achieved anything?


Suttonmum2022 · 10/12/2022 19:48

Really mean. Also, just my opinion, Santa shouldn’t be giving such large presents anyway - not every child will get an iPad or a Barbie dream house from Santa … best for parents to get the big gifts (should they wish) and Santa to get smaller presents. My DD would never have assumed that Santa could bring her something so expensive.


PearlclutchersInc · 10/12/2022 19:48

Time to get the message across that there's no Santa.

And no iPad.


Bambilegs80 · 10/12/2022 19:48



Dinoteeth · 10/12/2022 19:50

Op you need to intervein there.
It's almost verging on abusive. Is your friend normally like that?

I could see a kid like that ending up on the Stately Homes threads, we weren't cruel we gave you everything...


Wiloswisp · 10/12/2022 19:50

She’s mean. Reminds me of the day of my 16th birthday. Dad on his way to work said, ‘you do know I can legally kick you out now?’ I’m almost 60 now, I’ve never ever forgotten it!


Msgrieves · 10/12/2022 19:51

Is this a pattern of behaviour? Because singling one child out is not fucking on. Poor sod, could cause a lot of trauma.


Managinggenzoclock · 10/12/2022 19:51

Confusing messages. I don’t see what this would teach her except people don’t mean it when they say something. Either get it because you can afford it (and don’t give it from Santa! Santa needs to bring small presents) or don’t get it because you can’t afford it, which is also perfectly okay too.


CoopsMalloops · 10/12/2022 19:52

Your friend sounds like a complete nob head.


hiredandsqueak · 10/12/2022 19:52

It's so nasty, why would anyone want to upset a nine year old on Christmas Day?


Adultchildofelderlyparents · 10/12/2022 19:52

I don't think it will teach the lesson you want to, because they still get the iPad from Santa. Plus, using Santa to teach a lesson will just cause upset and is mean-spirited.
A better way to learn the lesson is if there is no iPad at Christmas but you go shopping for one in the sales afterwards - it's cheaper so you explain you can afford it in the sales.


Lovemusic33 · 10/12/2022 19:52

The 9 year old will remember this Christmas Day for ever, and not in a good way.

I hate anyone playing tricks in me so I wouldn’t do it to my child.

Their siblings are getting big ticket items, yes the iPad is more expensive but you have bought it anyway, you could have always said ‘Santa only brings toys’ but you didn’t so just let her have her moment Christmas morning with her iPad.


Beautiful3 · 10/12/2022 19:53

Really mean. It's your fault for telling him that santa brings the presents, so he believes money is no issue. It's better to tell them the stockings come from santa, and not their main presents. That way they learn that parents buy main gifts, and there is a budget to stick to.


louderforthepplattheback · 10/12/2022 19:53

Unbelievably cruel, the memory would stay with that child for the rest of their life. Your friend is a horrible person to even consider this.


Sockmonkeysloth · 10/12/2022 19:53

Surely all your 9 year old will learn from that is that Santa brings what you ask for, and mum’s an idiot…


Adultchildofelderlyparents · 10/12/2022 19:53

To add - you've already bought it, so you can afford it, so why try to make your child feel bad anyway?


batchainpuller · 10/12/2022 19:53

Absolutely horrible. Your friend is a dick.


Bournetilly · 10/12/2022 19:54

This is so mean, show her this thread.
Its probably the last year they will believe so pointless anyway and so unfair when the siblings will be getting their main presents.


Happyher · 10/12/2022 19:54

It’s not her fault she believes Santa will prevail. Don’t spoil the magic. She’ll learn soon enough. And when she’s old enough to understand what you did she will realise how horrible you were


Queeniewag · 10/12/2022 19:54

Horrible and mean


Rustyheart · 10/12/2022 19:55

Awful. Spiteful and pointlessly cruel.

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