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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

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Original poster

stuck at in laws, dh refusing to go out

343 replies

moanymoan · 26/12/2021 01:31

Just wanted a moan.

Staying with in laws. I don't drive and bus routes are not running tomorrow (boxing day). We have young children, one of whom is a breastfed baby.

Inlaws are lovely, but I'm finding it wearing being in someone else's home, not being able to eat when I like, switch off from others, leave the mess until I want to clear up, sharing a bathroom with several others etc. They do things very differently to me, like having long meals at the table, rarely having the TV on.

Dh has a big deadline, so keeps disappearing to the bedroom to work. Baby is sleeping badly, so I'm exhausted.

Prior to coming here, we isolated for 9 days as one of the relatives here is elderly. Dh works from home and I'm on mat leave so it wasn't too much hassle. But I felt very cooped up.

We have been in the house Christmas eve and boxing day. Agreed we'd take the kids to a country park on boxing day, but not go inside anywhere. But dh is now saying he doesn't want to, as it will be raining. As I don't drive, I'm literally stuck here.

I feel so stressed.

OP posts:

cherish123 · 27/12/2021 18:11

Go for a walk - either with children or on your own.

Runaround50 · 27/12/2021 18:15

OP, I hope you managed to escape for a bit or have managed to get home even?

Ignore the driving crap from ignorant irrelevant posters.
Seriously , get a grip on reality. Driving isn’t for everyone!

I drive, am 50 and very menopausal. Driving for me, triggers huge anxiety. I also have two teens and we live semi rural. Does my driving anxiety make me a bad irresponsible parent?? Does it fuck!

I’ve spent years driving them around, in the dark, down windy lanes, in the middle of bloody no where. Can’t do it now though. Fact of life. People change,

Maybe OP doesn’t want to drive?

RampantIvy · 27/12/2021 18:29

I live in a rural area of the north-east and non of my friends drive, I only learned to drive in my 30's and its not that worth it to be honest.

I think it is worth it. You must have good public transport, someone to drive you about or live near loads of amenities to not need to be able to drive.

C8H10N4O2 · 27/12/2021 18:34

@RampantIvy

I live in a rural area of the north-east and non of my friends drive, I only learned to drive in my 30's and its not that worth it to be honest.

I think it is worth it. You must have good public transport, someone to drive you about or live near loads of amenities to not need to be able to drive.

No what you "must" have is the money to buy, tax, insure a car and to take the lessons and past the test. As the PP very clearly explained in the part you carefully edited out.

Ericaequites · 27/12/2021 18:46

Have you tried finding a parking space and paying for it in NYC? It’s unaffordable for nearly all people.

Natab123 · 27/12/2021 18:48

Wow! No other words I'm afraid 🙈🤷‍♀️

Hertsgirl10 · 27/12/2021 18:59

@RosesAndHellebores

Why don't you drive? Why don't you go for a walk or say you'd like to feed the baby in front of the TV?

@RosesAndHellebores

What kinda question is ‘why don’t you drive’
Not everyone wants to drive you know.

Mollymoostoo · 27/12/2021 18:59

@moanymoan

Just wanted a moan.

Staying with in laws. I don't drive and bus routes are not running tomorrow (boxing day). We have young children, one of whom is a breastfed baby.

Dh has a big deadline, so keeps disappearing to the bedroom to work. Baby is sleeping badly, so I'm exhausted.

Prior to coming here, we isolated for 9 days as one of the relatives here is elderly. Dh works from home and I'm on mat leave so it wasn't too much hassle. But I felt very cooped up.

I feel so stressed.

Get an uber and go home.

Hertsgirl10 · 27/12/2021 19:00

Oh ok I’m clearly late to the party here 😂

lightisnotwhite · 27/12/2021 19:03

@RampantIvy

No I know, but it isn't that slow. There has been a massive lack of investment in our rail infrastructure, and when they try to do something about it they get is massively wrong - HS2 anyone?

I'm in Yorkshire, and quite frankly no-one cares whether they can shave 10 minutes off a journey to London.

Sorry to “derail”. I thought that too about HS2. However apparently the idea is to take the pressure of the northern train hubs as they have resulted in other local train routes becoming congested. Freeing up the commuters will mean better service on other trains.

GettingStuffed · 27/12/2021 19:17

I took DGS sake shopping today in our local town, a 15 minute walk plus a play in the park. It got me out of the house, yesterday I just walked out of the door and had a walk around the long block, nobody noticed.

As for not driving I took my test four times and failed ever time for a different reasons, all but one directly related to my dyspraxia .

TurquoiseDragon · 27/12/2021 19:18

why can't you express milk

Because not all of us can. I successfully fed two babies, but was never able to express any milk. Even tried changing to different pumps, and it didn't work.

Cheetosyummy · 27/12/2021 19:28

I lived in 3 European countries for various years and in none is Driving Ed compulsory.
Where did you heard that?
I’m European and I never learned to drive as it was not so common to own a car and drive.
My mum had a licence but she wouldn’t drive out of the village as she was scared.
I never learned as no need.
Now I’m in U.K. and I take a bus or walk,

RosesAndHellebores · 27/12/2021 19:32

@Hertsgirl10 it's a statement of fact question to someone whinging about not being able to go out because they can't drive.

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 27/12/2021 19:39

[quote RosesAndHellebores]@Hertsgirl10 it's a statement of fact question to someone whinging about not being able to go out because they can't drive.[/quote]
She’s not moaning about not driving. She’s moaning about being abandoned by her husband at his parents’ house.
She has a selfish husband who wants it all his way. He wants to stay at his parents and hide away from them all day.
She wants to spend time with him.

RosesAndHellebores · 27/12/2021 19:42

Well if she could drive she cd do something other than sit with his parents while he works.

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 27/12/2021 19:44

@RosesAndHellebores

Well if she could drive she cd do something other than sit with his parents while he works.

But she’d still be returning to their home and not seeing her husband. She wants to spend time as a family or be in her own home where she can relax.

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 27/12/2021 19:44

I can drive and this situation would not be solved by me being able to take the kids out alone every day.

Hertsgirl10 · 27/12/2021 19:49

[quote RosesAndHellebores]@Hertsgirl10 it's a statement of fact question to someone whinging about not being able to go out because they can't drive.[/quote]
@RosesAndHellebores
It’s definitely not.

If she drove she would just be taking her kids home having to spend the holiday season alone with them, yes she can go out but the actual issue here is her husband.

Driving is irrelevant to this post.

BringMeTea · 27/12/2021 19:51

So many wee shites on this thread. Sometimes I think an asteroid hitting the planet is the best way forward. Cos it's fucked either way.

Angie1403 · 27/12/2021 19:52

[quote Mummyoflittledragon]@ItIsntWhatYouThinkItIs

Symptoms are wide ranging and manifest differently in separate individuals. Your post is so patronising. dyspraxiafoundation.org.uk/dyspraxia-adults/[/quote]
No more patronising than the person WITH dyspraxia implying that the condition makes for dangerous drivers when ITS A SPECTRUM so their comments aren’t truly representative of all people with dyspraxia. What I’d a persons with the condition reads this and makes an assumption they can’t drive or other people without it assume that it’s dangerous for dyspraxics to drive?

Fluffmum · 27/12/2021 19:59

Go for a walk with in laws.

Original poster

Moanymoan · 27/12/2021 20:19

[quote RosesAndHellebores]@Hertsgirl10 it's a statement of fact question to someone whinging about not being able to go out because they can't drive.[/quote]
Wow that's rather harsh to accuse me of whingeing. I've explained in later post why I don't drive. And I've also explained that covid has created this problem. If we weren't avoiding being indoors to protect the elderly relative, I would have had options of places to take the kids without a car.

OP posts:

Fredstheteds · 27/12/2021 20:19

Suggest inlaws walk children and you have some time to sleep etc

Original poster

Moanymoan · 27/12/2021 20:23

I had no idea that there would be such a massive debate about driving 🙈

Should I also point out that parents in law have no bathroom bin, and no bath just a shower

OP posts:

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