Partner has nowhere to stay whilst I stay in hospital with our son who is recovering from a operation

[oldmoutcider]

Son has had an operation and we were due to stay four nights. Operation didn’t go as planned so we now in for the foreseeable. We had a hotel booked for him to stay at for four nights at a cost to ourselves whilst I stayed at the hospital but we need to stay longer and only one can stay by the bedside.
Hospital are now saying they have no accommodation for him. We are 2.5 hours from home. Any idea what we are expected to do?

Sorry to hear that. Can’t you take it in turns to do a night? That way you both get some sleep as well.

Sorry to hear about your son and hope he makes a full and fast recovery

Unfortunately your partner will have to either book more days in the hotel or go home. It's rubbish, I know, but the hospital can't accommodate people who don't need to be there.

Where in the country is it?

They would expect your partner to either return home and come back when you’re ready to be discharged or to extend his stay in a hotel/Air B&B or similar.

Some hospitals have a Ronald McDonald house for families of ill children.

otherwise you sort it out yourselves - hotel, family, Airbnb, actual bnb.

Talk to the patient liason officer for the ward, they have numerous information and different resources they can access if necessary.

@SmellsLikeTeenArmpit London. Great Ormond Street Hospital.

It’s tough OP but surely just one of you can stay with him and the other can go home? If need be you could swap around every few days. My own DD had major surgery a few years ago, 4 hours from home in London. DH was working abroad at the time, plus it was during Covid with restricted visiting so I had to stay with her on my own. It’s not ideal (both mentally and physically exhausting) but it’s doable.

Does he drive ? Can he stay during the day and drive home for the night?
Easier said then done being London .

Don’t one of you have to go back home?

What age is your son? Sorry to hear things didn’t go well and hope he is on the mend x

@TomatoSandwiches Already tried this. Nothing they can do on a Sunday apparently.

@Starlight7080Five hour drive away so not exactly ideal. Plus car at home not in London

I hope your son makes a recovery soon. There will be plenty of other accommodation available near GOSH although I appreciate you might find the cost difficult. Otherwise your partner will need to travel in from your home.

@3luckystarsThank you. He is three. He is much better now thanks. Back again in a month to do the original operation once he has healed x

Kindly OP, there is no ideal in this situation and you just need to make the best of things. Two of you don’t need to be bedside 24/7 and hospital accommodation reflects this. Unless you’re willing to pay £££ for London hotel prices then there’s no real option for both of you to be there

My niece was in great Ormond street for about 6 months , my brother and his wife did 3 nights each - her mother stayed the 7th night so they could have some couple time , they also have an older child so couldn't both just stay . It is tough I m sorry

Oh god OP- that’s so awful for you at a worrying time.

If cost is an issue, although it’s not great in the circumstances, there is a YHA youth hostel quite near you in kings cross.

alternatively, if you look at premier inns in zone 2, 3, or 4, whilst you’ll be up to half an hour away by tube, it’s not as bad as travelling home- and some are around £40-50 per night. Obviously not a longer term solution. from memory the premier inn at wembley is okay and can be cheap. Similarly look at premier inns around the northern line going north. That line goes directly into Kings X.

otherwise do you have family or friends in London that could put one of you up?

Also have a look at Z hotels. They are a pod room hotel at good prices. The Trafalaga one has a room for £75 for tonight then see if hospital can do something tomorrow.

@TiredofLDNThank you. Yes I have had a quick google of prices. Totally understand both of us are not needed at his bedside but he is three and just has major surgery. I think I am shocked that there isn’t a plan in place for the weekends when the family accommodation team don’t work and it is a children’s hospital x

I think the expected plan is that one of you goes home and then you take it in turns to stay overnight for a few days each. Parents with other children would be doing this in most cases. I hope your son's stay is as short as possible and that you find a hotel or AirBnB solution that works for you and your partner.

This.
I think once the shock and stress has died down and you’re thinking more clearly, you’ll agree this is the best and only approach.
The alternative would be spending NHS cash on accommodation for parents / relatives who don’t need to be there. Which would be bonkers.

https://rmhc.org.uk/getting-a-place-to-stay/

wy would there be a plan though? It’s a hospital it doesn’t have endless resources, it can’t provide accommodation for all families. Theres 2 of you, one can stay with your Ds and the other can go home. If it’s a longer stay swap after a few days.

Sorry you’re in this position OP, as others say though the expectation is that one parent stays with the poorly child, the other parent goes home. The NHS aren’t paying an adult to stay in a hotel etc unnecessarily.

So you think that because your son is three, you both need to be there? Sorry but this is not the case. Only one of you needs to be at the bedside, and you are expected to take it in turns.