Impact of death on daughter constipated sick and accidents

[WinterRach]

Long story short my father in law died last weekend in an accident. DD and him were best of buddies doing everything together so she’s devastated we all are. Since Wednesday she’s been feeling sick not had a poo since Tuesday. I thought perhaps stress might slow her poo down she is eating less. Being sick and wetting at night which again putting down to stress. She has been sick tonight with the pain

My neighbours daughter is a pharmacist she told us to try dulcolax suppositories which I gave her around 6. She’s managed to poo about 10 hard rocks of poo some in the loo some not I’ve had her in the bath to try and help go she’s been on in and out of the bath on the floor and back on the loo. Im pretty sure its just her constipated but I guess you never know what grief can do to them.

Her hands and feet are ice cold too. Ive popped winter fluffy pjs and fluffy socks on now popped towels on the bathroom floor and giver her a hot water bop for her belly.

Thank you for the update. I am delighted your daughter has turned a corner. Long may it continue

I entirely agree with your DH. DS has a chronic condition and if hes sick I take him straight to Crumlin and by pass the 3 hospitals between us.

OP, if she's dehydrated her veins will be very difficult to get blood from. Can you get squash or juice or anything she might be more tempted to drink, on top of any IV fluids?

Thinking it you loads, glad she's feeling a bit better

☕ 💐

She’s had a okay night. Had a lot of pain last night once she finally got all her pain meds she was ok. All her pain was in her lower belly and down below again. They just don’t care don’t ask or check. We did a wee sample and they didn’t test it they just dumped it

The care is just getting worse. While I’m glad she doesn’t need the amount of care she needed in the week her antibiotics that are usually only connected 30 minutes were left connected all night and this mornings ones the same still connected. We moved rooms and it’s freezing. Dads gone to get her oodie from home, fluffy socks and more.

we are making more notes. Lots of notes 💔

Would you feel able to take her to the Children's hospital yourselves? I know you said it's 3h drive away, and I gues logistically it'll be tricky with your other DC but it seems like she'll never get the help she needs where she is now. I cannot believe they are not testing left right and centre to find out what's going on. I'm furious for you. Sending strength x

This is the colour of her wee this morning (and that’s just wee). I’ve taken her drip down and disconnected it so we could get her warmed up. I’ll be making it even more known shortly how unhappy we are. They did weigh her yesterday after moving rooms and she’s lost 1.5kg since Tuesday 😩 she’s a small kid

I would try to take her to Dublin yourself if at all possible. What you're going through is horrific 😞

A very good suggestion.

I know our bodies can do crazy stuff but it seems incredibly odd, that the Doctors are putting your daughter's symptoms down to the fact she's lost her Grandfather. Has your daughter had gastric issues prior to this? I absolutely appreciate IBS can happen, but usually there are signs, before an acute attack. Is the children's hospital in Dublin, a hospital where admission is via a GP or other hospital referral? Unless the hospital has an A&E, it's unlikely patients can just turn up. Keep asking questions, make notes, gather as much information as you can. I honestly feel for you, as a Mum myself, it's bloody hard to see your child unwell, let alone in hospital and receiving inadequate care in the process.

It's a very bad idea to just go to the Dublin hospital, even if they do have an A&E. Worst case scenario - you self discharge from your current hospital, arrive at Dublin, and are not admitted, leaving you with very few options.

I think the best thing you can do is what you are doing. Stay put and advocate for your DD. Good luck.

We have had excellent experiences at Crumlin, and family have had similar at Temple St. I can't imagine anything like your experience happening there.

I'm not medically qualified and in no way suggesting you should move her but both hospitals have A&E with a very efficient triage system.

I'm so sorry to read about your DD's experience it sounds awful. Do you have a GP who knows your dd? I would call them and ask their advice.

https://www.patientadvocacyservice.ie/faq/who-can-help-me-make-a-complaint/

This might be useful now or in the future

You need to talk to someone who knows how to navigate the system. Do you know anyone, friend of a friend, who is a nurse/doctor?

Poor girl, you must be so frustrated OP.

Is there anyway you can contact Dublin hospital and find out what their waiting times for admittance would be? As someone said linking it with grandfather‘s death, it’s just weird. If you’re not comfortable driving there would you consider hiring an ambulance their common in the UK I don’t know about SI.

Still thinking of you all, OP 💐

The colour of that urine is extremely concerning. I’d be worried about rhabdomyolysis

Thinking of you all, as we start a new week.

I've been following your story. Just wanted to say I think you and your girl have been incredibly brave. Really hoping you can get here the attention she deserves. Any luck with private insurance?

I hope you have had rounds and seen the consultants now and have a plan or some reassurance this morning.

@WinterRach I too have been thinking about you and wondering how things are today. Hope she is improving

How is your daughter today? I hope that now it is Monday that you have more chance of seeing the right consultants today and they have more of a joined up approach or you manage to get her transferred to a hospital specialising in paediatric care. You’re doing great advocating for her.

She had a bad few hours last night. Which is so frustrating she was so bright and all of a sudden went down. She had a sudden horrible pain in her belly down into her groin being sick and thick diarrhoea she was destroyed in bed she’s so upset and embarrassed 😩 the staff were fantastic with her last night, the doctors came really quickly within about 2 minutes and examined her. They did an ultrasound but it didn’t show anything they are trying to decide if she needs an internal one. She had another episode when we were in the shower (greatful it happened in the shower) and she sent do dizzy and grey.

All week she’s been refusing to sit in the shower in chair but not last night or today. She’s lost all her independence she’s started to ask if she will ever be able to wee, shows, change, stop feeling sick or ever be able to just pee without straining. They brought us some bed pans but she’s refusing them and this is not something we are going to force. Thankfully her oodie managed to survive it all

Shes back on all her pain kills she had slowly work down from morphine, codine and paracetamol to just paracetamol. She’s on 2 different anti sickness which is just working. We also made it down from 4 to 2 (annoyingly in her very bruised hand) we have any anymore can go in her little foot to give her send a slight break. She’s happy she’s had the rainbow of IV lines of orange green pick blue and yellow.

her observations are okay and infection markers are back within range. She’s still on all the antibiotics and her wee is as brown as it was yesterday. Dad did sneak in a smarties McFlurry yesterday her little face made us so proud I know she’s mine but she’s been a trooper not complaining about the boardroom

for the perforated oesophagus she is getting frequent chest pain. They are doing another CT scan with the swollen liquid to check if her oesophagus has closed they think it will. They said they are being more cautious than normal…😳. They have been getting advice from the surgical specialist in Dublin but we don’t need to go there nor do we want to go there if they’ll just do the smart as here.

thank you so much for all your kind words and help.

Rach, Liam & P 💜

Your poor little girl, this is just awful xx

Just read your update. Your poor wee girl. I’m so sorry. So traumatic for you all.

I’m glad they are being a bit more attentive and hope things start to look up soon.

Sending love. It sounds like things are slowly improving. Tiny steps xx