Fuck fuck fuck nanny has resigned

[PalindromicUser]

I know she absolutely has the right to resign but I’m so cross! It’s been such a difficult year. DD only has another 9 months until she starts school then nanny could look after as many babies as she wants to (she’s taken a job looking after a 5 month old).

I’m also really disappointed she resigned via WhatsApp rather than calling me. I can understand that she wanted to avoid having a potentially difficult conversation but that’s what being a grown up is like, surely?

It will be fine, we will go back to more nursery and wrap around but I just wanted to let of steam with people who know how much I feel left in the lurch! Plus the additional organisational burden will almost certainly fall to me - the nanny was most helpful to me rather than DH and relieved so much of that burden.

I don't really know about nannies but surely she has to serve a notice period like any other job? I know that doesn't help much but it reads as though she's basically told you she won't be returning. Is that the case?

TBH if you feel entitled to berate her online, I'm suspect you're a pain to work for. I have no interest in the Nannies section but this appeared for all to see on active conversations.

You're annoyed with the situation, not the nanny.

Wow @SaltyAF I have no idea how you reached that conclusion. Is it really that difficult to imagine that I might be really nice but extremely disappointed that this came completely out of the blue and also with the way she has handled it?

Yes @FTMF30 she has to serve a notice period but I now have to organise childcare for two children with a month’s notice which may or may not be possible.

Could you have her thrown in jail for being so impertinent?

Plus the additional organisational burden will almost certainly fall to me - the nanny was most helpful to me rather than DH and relieved so much of that burden. How's that the Nanny's fault?

But this could always happen if you gave her a contract with one months notice? If you think that’s not enough time then in future make the contract 2 months notice or something?

Nothing you can do now anyway - crap but as you said she’s entitled to leave

"Plus the additional organisational burden will almost certainly fall to me - the nanny was most helpful to me rather than DH and relieved so much of that burden."

To use a well worn MN phrase...you don't have a nanny problem, you have a DH problem.

I agree it's bad form to resign over whatsapp and not a proper conversation though.

Presumably she saw the writing on the wall as regards her role and decided to secure a new job rather than risk a gap: not unreasonable.

Finding a temporary nanny should be do-able.

Don’t know why you’re getting so much stick OP. You’re allowed to be annoyed! This is a big change for you in a year that’s already been very changeable.

Also resigning over WhatsApp is never okay. How long had she been with you for?

I can totally understand how frustrating this is. Anyone with pre school children surely understands this. The life of working parents and often mums is like walking a tightrope and you've been pushed off now! I totally get it. Of course it's not the nannies fault but still very frustrating.

Crikey resigning over whatsapp is not on.

Don’t worry about finding someone new there are loads around atm (lots have been furloughed or let go). But you must be so disappointed.

OP- I hear you (we would be fucked if our incredibly flexible and lovely nanny left) but this isn’t the nanny’s fault. People are allowed to leave their jobs. You are allowed to be upset with the situation but not at the nanny.
As for her resigning over whatsapp, I think you have to ask yourself why she chose that route. Personally I would give it some self reflection.
I hope you find a workable solution. Good luck

We have a nanny and its really useful feel sorry for you, why don't you just find another nanny quite a few websites out there and lots looking for work.
Nannys usually would try to give you advanced notice but chances are like with anu market if.someone pays more or gives nicer benefits people will move.

Childcare.co.uk has a few options or you may need to go for a temping service initially nothings ideal is they want know your child...

It is annoying when the plans you had derail through no fault of your own and you're left dealing with solution finding! I hope it works out OK.

I wrote my notice and my boss wasn't happy about that! WhatsApp resigning isn't acceptable though.

Nanny's do take on immediate, short term temporary jobs but with lockdown I'm not sure if they are allowed.

Is she working notice ?

I understand your frustration, especially if your dd has a bond with her. WhatsApp is poor, but I daresay because she felt so awkward and is a people pleaser (which is perhaps what makes her a lovely nanny), if she's been good then best to keep remembering all she's done to help you and how she's cared for Dc and move on.

There are lots of nannies currently available, due to redundancies and people working from home and needing less care. I'd suggest you look on childcare.co.uk before faffing around with wraparound care etc, especially with school holidays looming and potential future lockdowns.

Once someone decides to leave then telling their employer as soon as possible is helpful to the employer. So a WhatsApp message stating the fact that the decision has been made, gives you the information at the earliest opportunity. If they had waited until giving you a formal letter the next time they see you, then that delays you being told. There is never a great way to give bad news. Calling you would not have made a difference to the outcome, the decision has been made. You can have a chat about it at some point during the notice period if you both feel like having a chat about what has gone well, what has not gone so well... an exit interview as it were.

As a nanny I find handing in my notice really hard. I don't often do it... most jobs have come to a end due to the parents making me redundant, which is a really hard decision for them even though it is often clear that a redundancy is on the cards... as children are all at school, or a parent has stopped/reduced their own work.

Letting off steam here is fine... you are right to be upset about an employee leaving. It often does come as a surprise as an employee does not often say that they are looking around for other jobs.

This year has been bad for everyone. Nannying is not what it was with the Covid restrictions. Those trips out to museums, rides on the train/bus/tram, meeting friends at the park, all sorts of things have not been as they were in pervious years.

How should nannies resign? How should parents tell their nanny that their job is ending? Is there a best way to do these things - we all use technology so much now that it is going to be used for a resignation letter but is that the most friendly way to do it? Maybe it is something that should be discussed prior to the event occurring - as some people may prefer it to be in-person, some via a phone call, some via text or email. We are all individuals and we do not know each others preferences for this kind of news being given.

Do you know what, I haven’t been on MN since the start of the pandemic but I thought I would dip my toe back in. I thought it would be better to let my frustration out here, since I can’t get cross with the nanny.

As a PP mentioned, being a working parent is like walking a tightrope. And the kids have had enough upheaval already this year, as have I. I quite deliberately posted in this section because I thought parents with nannies would understand. Clearly, I was wrong.

Also, one months notice is a bit silly. I always had three months and that was a more sensible time scale.

Is she leaving with or without notice? If nannies want to be seen as a profession with the pay and benefits that go with that they need to act that way.

Can you imagine the uproar if a parent gave notice to a nanny by what’s app. They would be crucified (rightly).

That sucks OP and a really annoying gap before your daughter starts school. I have found it really useful to keep my nanny on reduced hours through the first year of school for flexibility so you might be able to tempt someone for an 18 month contract or something?

What an absolute fucker.

Do you have any friends who would do a nanny share for such a short amount of time?

I work as a nanny and I always insist on a 12 week notice period. This may seem excessive but childcare is difficult to arrange and jobs often come up a while in advance. All parents I've worked with have been very pleased with this arrangement.