As a parent, would you find this too bossy?

[Snap8TheCat]

I'm a well established childminder and when a new family starts with me I provide them with a pack of my policies and procedures and all the forms I need completing.

I'm thinking of adding a page to iron out little niggles that invariably crop up. Things like, please name clothing, don't drop off early without prior arrangement, i prefer nappies instead of pull ups, no lace up shoes etc etc

It's all worded very friendly but firmly. I feel it's better to air these things before they become a problem and I have to find a way of bringing it up.

However I'm dithering over whether to include it or not. Parents, what do you think?

Supermarkets, doctors surgeries, toddler groups, children's centres?

Supermarkets and doctors surgeries no but I never change his nappies there as he poos morning and evening and I change him before we go out

Toddler groups are always no shoes. As is nursery!

Added a 2 there, only one almost 2 year old!

I must change up to 15 nappies a day...in the house, in the toddler group, in the car and often on my lap. Children at toddler groups have shoes on in my house they don't. I possibly have one nappy a week that the leg accidently slips off one foot if that. While you change the baby you talk to him count tickle and be fun exactly as its been done for years ....but if you use nappy pants and plan to use pull ups how on earth is baby supposed to know the difference?
In the past we were shown how to change nappies by our families and sometimes midwives what a shame nobody does it now if all these parents are struggling so much it really is so easy. My mum was in a wheel chair and even she managed to do it.
When you have children to get to school who are not yours no way can you spend 10 minutes changing a dirty nappy that hits you as your about to leave stripping off converse skinny jeans etc and putting them back on again ...and surely if baby kicks off their trousers in a nappy change they would just as easily get a leg out of pants? Save the nappy pants for home and buy your cm a pack of nappies costs the same so what's the problem?
I personally add to my list that I don't use Sippy cups all mine go from bottle to open cup and free flow drinks. But I do explain my reasons for asking for things such as part of Ofsted requirement is school readiness which includes self dressing so please send your Lo in loose fitting trousers that they can pull up themselves and Velcro shoes that they can help to put on.....
To those saying a cm is lazy for not tying shoes actually most cms spend longer supporting the children to put on their own shoes and have to encourage parents to take more time and not rush into doing it themselves. Most 2 year old can do this and put on their own coats with many managing the zip but I struggle to stop my parents automatically doing it because they are in a rush.

How many children fo childminders have to have to make a living? Sounds like they are at a rush all the time. Are childminders a lot cheaper than nursery?

50Bales

No we are not in a rush 'all the time' butr at certain times of the day we need to be out the door on time, not faffing around with skinny jeans, boots and pull ups for 3 or more kids.

Its not difficult to understand. I think some people are genuinely being awkward and misdirecting what the OP and some of us other child carers are saying. Just to have a pop at someone who dared to say that they might ask parents to think about someone else other than their own kid/own selves.

I totally get velcro shoes, and was happy to be flexible with mealtimes, naptimes, most things really.

Pull-ups though worked well for DD who was an enthusiastic potty user by the time she started going to CM at 1. Her CM was fine with that, I'm not sure we'd have chosen one who wasn't however lovely generally.

So I think if you have any sticking points that may be unexpected - it sounds like nappies/pullups may be one such - definitely discuss before agreeing a space. Having a standard information sheet that you send out with contracts etc would be a good idea too, so it's in writing before they've signed anything. I think DD's CM had something like that.

OP I'm more than happy to read anything you like 👍

Thanks, I've sent you a PM.

on the subject of laces re velcro, imagine this trip out (which i do at least once a week with 3 unders 5's) children arrive at mine (take of shoes going to abbreviate to TOS) play/breakfast etc time to go out (POS; put on shoes) get to farm go into soft play (tos) finished soft play go to see animals (pos) play in out side play area (tos to empty out sand pos) repeat. children want to jump on the bouncy pillows (tos...pos) back in to soft play (tos pos) then home (tos) children play out side we have free flow so they come and go as they like (pos/tos several times) dinner (tos) home time (POs) now times that by 3 and thats a lot of laces to do up. and thats not even the times they have just come undone. velcro all the way!!

op i think if you can write in a faq way it might come across better than a list of bullet points. good luck

That's a lot of putting on of shoes mememe! My friends dresses her ds in cloth nappies, dungarees and lace ups- he looks adorable but it takes her a full 10 minutes to change his nappy! Her mum looks after him whilst she works but I think a cm would really struggle.

Are you the childminder who said on a recent thread you keep a notebook especially to write down things that parents do that you feel are of concern to you (the thread was specifically about giving a toddler Diet Coke and that childminder said they would make a note of it as it was a red flag/bigger picture type of thing IIRC?)

I do apologise if that wasn't you. I haven't ASed you and I think the thread was deleted anyway. You do remind me of that poster though. If it is you, I would thank god my DC are too old for a childminder!

And just to clarify, I'm not talking about the usual safeguarding policies etc which you would expect a CM to have/follow. This childminder was very...authoritarian and seriously believed a parent giving a toddler Diet Coke in their own home was worthy of The Notebook entry

I think every childcare provider and school will keep a note of concerns.

Just don't phrase them as negatives i.e. velcro and slip on shoes are preferable

*Yesterday 23:13 5OBalesofHay

How many children fo childminders have to have to make a living? Sounds like they are at a rush all the time. Are childminders a lot cheaper than nursery?*

I might be in a rush in the morning, but I manage to get 8 children out of the door, on time, for school every morning. I meet a lot of parents on my way back who have struggled to get one child out of the door on time and are late, again. We are on time (even with so many children) because I know what works and I have taught the children I look after a bit of independence, they can do their own shoes/jumpers/coats. Laces would not help that situation so yes, I do mention they are not the best for small children.

I'm a childminder and am thinking of doing this too. I find that the sort of parent's I want to attract would totally understand and be glad to have it all ironed out before they start, whereas those who would take offence are not necessarily the type of family I'd want to be working with.
And Yes to no pull ups... nothing worse than trying to clean poo out of a pull up without covering the child in poo!

dog cleaning poo out of a pull up is no different to cleaning it out of a nappy. You tear the sides off.

Some of them are very difficult to tear in my experience. Also, they are more expensive, and easier for a child to remove which is not something I want them to be doing if they have pood in them.
In my setting children are either toilet trained, and so they are not needed, or they are not, so they are not needed. Children are potty trained outside of my setting. IMO pull ups send mixed messages to children who are trying to use a toilet.

Your message to parents is absolutely fine OP. Some people on this thread seem to have forgotten that a Childminder is self employed and is not a Nanny which means the CM sets the rules. As a paying parent you therefore have the option to accept them and send your child or move on to another CM who meets your needs.

Why some posters are making such a fuss about a self employed working stating their terms and conditions is beyond me not to mention all this nonsense about the OP seeming inflexible and rigid because she has the temerity to let parents know her preferred way of working

My CM has a several preferences but she did not tell us this when we started working with her and have found out by trial and error e.g. she also prefers nappies but we didn't find out until we started sending DS in pull-ups and she started dropping hints, frowning when she saw the pull-ups. Would have really preferred it if she told us at the start!

I don't think we're making a fuss, to be fair.

The OP asked if it would be too bossy: for me, it would be, for others, not so.

My CM is the queen of the pass agg strop if we do something she doesn't like (but she's fab in everyone way so we've stayed with her for 6 years and just kept an eye on her moods to see what we shouldn't be doing ) It would be easier if she just told us first.

Also to answer a previous post CMs are usually more expensive than nursery but imo a good one is worth every penny.