As a parent, would you find this too bossy?

[Snap8TheCat]

I'm a well established childminder and when a new family starts with me I provide them with a pack of my policies and procedures and all the forms I need completing.

I'm thinking of adding a page to iron out little niggles that invariably crop up. Things like, please name clothing, don't drop off early without prior arrangement, i prefer nappies instead of pull ups, no lace up shoes etc etc

It's all worded very friendly but firmly. I feel it's better to air these things before they become a problem and I have to find a way of bringing it up.

However I'm dithering over whether to include it or not. Parents, what do you think?

Thanks everyone for your input.

I think essentially we are all different and for childminding that's actually a good thing. There's someone out there for everyone and it doesn't make anyone right or wrong. Just different.

Thank you.

I'm a nanny and agree with you totally on pull ups/laces etc.

You are also 100% right re. the rules weeding out the parents that will be a nightmare to work with.

Anyone who is obsessing over which nappy is most comfortable or getting all upset because they might have to pick up a pack of nappies AND a pack of pull ups instead of two packs of pull ups is going to be a nightmare to work with.

Anyone who can't understand why laces on a baby's shoes are a faff is not going to understand how group care works.

Anyone who thinks that making their childminder's life easier is a bad thing is bordering on unhinged!

As you say, there are enough 'normal' families to fill the spaces so you can happily exclude the less understanding and cooperative ones.

Even as a nanny I ask for nappies and velcro. It's never been a problem. I've been very lucky with great families!

I'm with you OP. I'm an ex childminder. I'd say (if queried) that as you are likely to be changing several children it IS important to do it as quickly as possible so that you can get back to the other children.

"OP bends over backwards to help parents with emergency care, early starts, late finishes, forgotten lunch boxes, etc. All she asks in return is a few things to make life easier for their children and god forbid herself. "

No, she's not helping by doing favours and asks one in return. She is providing a service and charges money for it in return. And she is stipulating a dress code, similar to a school, in detailing what type of nappies and footwear your child must have in her setting. She's not doing it for free

Actually I don't charge for those 'extras'. Not unless people take the poss which luckily they haven't so far.

*take the piss

One of the dc I mind has converse boots. They are a nightmare to get on a wriggling, non compliant small child. I mentioned to his dad what a nightmare they are to get on his feet and so they save them for home and Send me his proper shoes. Absolutely no problem at all. I'm not seen as bossy or uncooperative, he was genuinely glad I mentioned it as they don't want me to have to struggle and have admitted if they had known how difficult they were to get on they wouldn't have bought them in the first place.
Three nappies to change at a time, yes, pull ups are a pain (I don't generally take tights/trousers for nappy changes) but then I'm not really convinced about their help in potty training either so maybe the wrong person to ask about them really.

Ok I genuinely don't understand why pull ups are any different to nappies.

Why are they?

Politely mentioning a preference is fine, making it a rule before entering the CMs house would strike me as bizarre.

I can no longer be bothered to explain. I'll save it for my lovely families who do get it.

I tried to change a poo in a pull up once. Never again! It went everywhere 😣

To put a pull up on, a child has to he undressed from the waist down. To put a napoy on, it's just trousers pulled down, nappy on, pull trousers up. No messing around with shoes or anything. Much quicker.

Pull ups aren't needed for toilet training either, but if a parent particularly wanted to use them, I would.

Good grief OP.

Thanks HSMM! Why a parent needs a step by step instruction as to why they are different is beyond me!

I really, honestly can't quite understand your motivation for posting, OP.

You are right. You are convinced you are right, and anyone who might not be right is both stupid and it is heavily implied, "not lovely." You are successful and when you explain to your parents the standards that must be adhered to before a tiny foot steps over your revered threshold they bow down at your superiority.

So why post? To smugly state how wonderful you are?

Still doesn't make sense to me I'm afraid as I have to undress my DS from the waist down if I put him a nappy - if I pull his trousers down to the knees he just kicks them off.

If we are anywhere indoors he's always in socks or barefoot so I don't have to take his shoes off either.

But you carry on being rude by all means.

Apologies if you thought I was rude. I have changed hundreds of nappies without undressing the child.

Also, to the other poster, OP wasn't asking if her requests are reasonable, she was just asking for advice about the best way to tell parents.

Sorry HS, I meant the op.

Eh? You take your ds's shoes off whenever you go indoors? Supermarkets, doctors surgeries, toddler groups, children's centres?

HSMM you seem to get where coming from! Would you mind if I copy and pasted my draft for you to have a read and make any suggestions?

Oh you rip the sides! Ahhhhhh.

Sorry to slightly derail. As you were, everyone.

Moomin

Yes but thats in your house, in a cm house all the childrem will not be running around without shoes and socks on, other kids will happily have their nappy changed without kicking off their trousers.

Using a nappy just minimises the time needed to change them. Pulling down skin tight jeans, taking of gimicky trainers and boots then putting them all back on again does take time if you have 3 or 4 kids all the same who need changing after lunch before you go and pick up another child/take them home etc.

And pull ups do not usually help with potty training anyway. Its too easy just to pee in them and not let on!

You can rip the side to get the dirty nappy off but you need to take off shoes and pants to put a fresh one on. This takes longer, longer still with lace up shoes. If you have two or three kids in nappies who all poo during, say a toddler group the extra time changing one is time that the others are either watched by someone else or roaming around a toilet/baby change room. Having my 2 almost 2 year old roaming around a toilet is not ideal!