Overwhelmed - Husband is against getting induced!

[kakashixxkillua]

Hi all! I'm currently 38w+0d today. We went to see a hospital consultant recently as my baby was plotting as big in the growth scans - 96th percentile. Note, I have no health risk or underlying medical issues, it's just baby is** measuring too large. The hospital consultant strongly urged I opt for either an induction or an elective c section, I went for the induction. It's all booked in for 39w (next Monday). DH couldn't make it to this appointment and so when I filled him in he was furious as he's anti medical interventions, alongside his entire family. My MIL is also very opinionated on my decision

Anyways, was just looking for some positive induction stories from you guys as I've been around a lot of negativity and criticism recently and started to regret my choice. Or is there a way I can naturally induce myself before 39w?

Thanks x

Your body, your choice! And you're following advice from health care personnel who are trained to ensure that both you and your baby are safe and healthy. Absolutely have your induction at the scheduled time (or your c-section, if it comes to that!). Your husband is being an arse.

I had an induction at 40 weeks. Nothing happened for a while after they did the drip so then they popped my waters a few hours later and labour started very quickly. 5 hours later I was holding baby in my arms. Having had a ‘natural’ birth (non induced) after that I’m not sure I would choose the induction again but at the time I didn’t regret my decision at all.
Hope all goes well xx

As a woman who has had 4 big fuck off kids, take the induction, if the scans are wrong then it’s only a week before due date. The baby will be fine.

Go back & opt for the elective c-section. It's rarely given as an option. Birthing is hard with a big baby.

Thanks for all the advice everyone, it hasn't fallen on deaf ears. I spent the day having a serious talk with H to understand why he felt how he did. He explains MIL had an incredibly traumatic birth with his younger sibling & he doesn't want to see me go through the same. She's still holding onto that hurt from all those years ago. I firmly stated that it's my body my choice and I just want the best for our DC. He was apologetic but is still against the induction!

In terms of not having him there during the birth, he's all I have in terms of family and I moved to an entirely new city to start our life together. My sister will be attending too and she's been my primary support so if im out of it she'll take the reins.

Thanks for everyone who shared their induction stories, very grateful xxx

Important -
He's unvaccinated, yes, very much the type that will only consent to medical attention if on death bed. Same with MIL, both take a "holistic" approach to stuff. This will not be the case for our baby, he's aware of this.

He wasn't able to come to that particular appt due to work commitments, he has been in attendance though for all the other appts

Tell him to take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut.

I was induced at 39 (was meant to be 38) as baby was measuring small.

Honestly? I hope if im lucky enough to have another baby, I can be induced again. I had the balloon and that was enough. Gas and air saw me through. Yes I had to end up having ventouse - she was stuck, that would have happened regardless.

Obviously your choice

but why did you think he’d be different about this when he’s always been anti medical interventions

Your body your choice. Your DH gets no say.

I was induced at 40 weeks with a potentially large baby. I had 4 failed inductions and after 5 days ended up having an emergency c section for a baby who weighed 7lbs. There were plenty people on ward it worked for and had babies complication free no one can predict how it goes unfortunately. Good luck with whatever option you take xx

Not his body, not his business

I went a bit earth-mother-hippy-dippy when I was pregnant and thought I didn't want any medical interventions. In the end I had all the interventions in order to end up with a live, healthy baby, which is all that mattered. My DP went along with whatever I decided because he knows better than to voice an opinion on my pain management, my personal physical and emotional needs, my body. Unless your DP is an experienced midwife or obstetrician, I suggest you make it clear that you will be listening to the experts on your team and making your own informed choices about what happens to your body. Medical interventions are there for the good of the baby and the mother. By all means try some of the natural induction methods / old wives tales (I tried all of them) but medical induction was the only thing that worked for me and my baby in the end and honestly, it was fine.

I haven’t rtft but I hope you told him to get tae fuck

From someone who has been induced because of a large baby, and ended up with emergency c-section, then tried natural birth, which ended up in emergency c-section, then had two elective c-sections, I would pick elective sections over and over again! Omg the difference!! Peaceful, calm, good recovery, absolutely brilliant.

My first, same as you, was measuring very large, I opted for induction which then consisted of several days and nights of lots of pain and not a lot happening and ended in emergency section. As the surgeon pulled him out he said, and I quote, “oh yes, there was no way this chap was coming out naturally”.

I honestly don’t understand the stigma with elective sections, and would go this route for all my deliveries if I had my time again.

I was induced with my second who was measuring 95th centile ISH at 38 weeks (and consistently before that). 1st was consistently 25th centile and was a ventouse after spontaneous labour at 38+3.

2nd was induced at 38+2, only needed the gel to kick things off before he followed the same pattern as his sister of quick stage one followed by ventouse after getting a bit stuck on the pushing stage. Both labours had quicker stage 1 than stage 2 so I guess that is a me thing rather than an induction thing.

The risk with bigger babies is shoulders getting stuck so if they're measuring big I'd be tempted to induce or C-section. DS definitely had (and still has) substantial shoulders so definitely felt like induction was the right choice.

Plus point of induction for me was that labour wasn't mostly in a car faffing about with am I/aren't I in labour. With DC 1 it was get checked and sent home at 9am, back in at 11 at 8cm then give birth at 2, so quite annoying... Also made childcare easier as it was planned...

Obviously it’s your body and your choice.

personally I would say though that scans are not always correct, my hospital kept telling me that DC3 was huge and the obstetrician said I needed to be induced no later than my due date but they were all wrong and just scaremongering.
DC3 was exactly the same size as both previous DCs and bang on national average when she came out 10 days “late”

induction is known to lead to often worse outcomes… I understand where your husband is ck in from…

As others have said YOU need to do whatever YOU feel is right. You are the one having this baby.

Induction can be a scary prospect as I feel folk like to share their horror stories about it. I had a very straightforward induction. In fact it was going so well that they broke my waters in the midwifery led unit and I had my ds there. It ended up being a much more positive experience to my first birth (all natural, water birth). In addition to being induced I also chose to have morphine during my second labour. If your DH is your birth partner they MUST be on the same page as you re pain relief. Your birth partner is the main person who can advocate for you if you feel unable to at any point.

We are incredibly lucky that we are having our babies in a time when life saving medical interventions and good pain relief exist and in a country that they are free to all.

Anti medical interventions….so he’s already setting himself up nicely to not have a vasectomy. Abusive knob

My first baby was delivered naturally at 40+5 he was 10lb9.5oz. The pushing stage took a long time and left me very weak and exhausted and I had a pph. My second was induced at 39 weeks, he was 9lb 3oz and he came out in 3 pushes and I felt wonderful afterwards! I couldn't believe I was able to stand up and have a shower.
It's your body, don't let anyone dictate to you how you give birth especially when you're heeding medical advice!

I do worry for the future for you, you will constantly be at odds with him over all medical decisions. Will he 'allow' baby to be vaccinated? How will he feel about medications when baby is ill etc?

I wonder what his thoughts would be if he got a major health condition (non life threatening), I bet he'd allow himself to get treatment rather than suffer.

Agree and I'm afraid the OP isn't going to find it as easy as she thinks to insist on vaccinations and other health care for her baby.

I don't think this is about his sister's birth at all. It's about control.

Did they say how big the baby was measuring? I honestly would go with whatever the doctors say. I can't see them recommending invention if it wasn't needed. Everything might be fine if you give birth naturally but then again, it might not be and you'll never forgive yourself if you took the risk.
I'd go with the doctors and ignore your husband. My MIL had to get a C-section with all of her children as they were large and she had small hips. She tried to birth naturally with her first but they both nearly didn't make it.

Sometimes I despair when I read threads on here about the people some women choose to have babies with.

I have been induced with mine and I am so thankful I did. I was induced as high risk as I lost my firstborn during labour....... and your husband needs to realise that that scenario is WAY more common than we like to think. Genuinely is one of those unless it happens to you...... so my next 2 pregnancies I was induced at 33 and 34 weeks. My oldest started secondary school today! Is July born so only just turned 11, my height, bigger feet and dress size to me and is absolutely thriving.
Unless he has substantial evidence that induction can cause more harm to your child or you than following professionals advice, I would tell him to go f* himself to be completely honest.
I am the 1 in 4 who has lost a child, I will always always always advise to follow what your consultant suggests

OP, I was induced with my first because of risk (concerns over low fluid around the baby). I was 40+2 when he was eventually born. Also went to 40+2 with my 2nd and was booked in for another induction - tried all the usual stuff to start labour naturally and in the end acupuncture worked for me just in time 😊

And take your baby for all their vaccinations and paediatric checkups with no discussion. Present it all as a done deal.

OP your body your choice. You OH is allowed to voice his opinion but cannot decide. Your MIL. And his family CANNOT voice their opinions. Do you have a friend or someone from your family who can advocate for you during birth?

(btw I am a wimp and at 96% I would have gone C section every day).