Overwhelmed - Husband is against getting induced!

[kakashixxkillua]

Hi all! I'm currently 38w+0d today. We went to see a hospital consultant recently as my baby was plotting as big in the growth scans - 96th percentile. Note, I have no health risk or underlying medical issues, it's just baby is** measuring too large. The hospital consultant strongly urged I opt for either an induction or an elective c section, I went for the induction. It's all booked in for 39w (next Monday). DH couldn't make it to this appointment and so when I filled him in he was furious as he's anti medical interventions, alongside his entire family. My MIL is also very opinionated on my decision

Anyways, was just looking for some positive induction stories from you guys as I've been around a lot of negativity and criticism recently and started to regret my choice. Or is there a way I can naturally induce myself before 39w?

Thanks x

I’m absolutely livid for you!

There are two points here: (1) whether you want to have an induction. (2) whether your husband gets a say in whether you have an induction.

Re (1), I personally was induced with my first and would avoid it next time - just because I really wanted a really natural birth with no pain relief or intervention. However if my doctor recommended an induction I would take that very seriously, and if the doctor said an induction was in babies’ best interest, I would have the induction. Keep in mind however that growth scans aren’t very accurate (that being said baby could be larger than they think as well as smaller!).

Re (2), your birth plan is ultimately a discussion for you and your doctor / midwives. If you are making a decision which could negatively impact the health of your baby, I think you should - ethically - discuss this with your husband, but ultimately it’s your decision. In this case, having an induction is (per your doctor’s advice) in the best interest of you and your baby.

Your husband had absolutely no place to veto this and no right to be angry. I would think long and hard about whether this is a pattern of behaviour - if so is this someone you want to raise a child with? Does he generally believe in a woman’s autonomy over her body? Do you want someone who isn’t supportive of your choice in the birthing room? I think I would be saying he’s not welcome in the birthing room.

MIL can fuck off.

It’s your body. You do what you want and what is best for you, not your DH and his family. If you were valued and respected as a wife and expectant mother, your DH would support you.
Don’t be too frightened by the scan. My friends little boy was scanned and shown as being large and looking to be 10lbs. She was induced and had an OR on standby. Her son came out naturally at 7lbs. They were way off. Don’t be scared and please do what you have to do and feel comfortable with. You are delivering this baby, not your DH or his family. Wishing you luck and sending love.

Outrageous the DH is against you being induced …. How the heck does it have anything yo do with him! It’s your body… you’ve been advised to go with the opinion of medical professionals!! End of!

This!!!

It's your body not his. Tell him you were informing him, not asking him for permission and to take his controlling abuse elsewhere.

Induction is painful, but you shouldn't try any home-made induction - You could kill yourself and baby!! I was induced on my middle child - It goes a bit faster than a labour which starts on its own, but then again my 3rd baby was 43 minutes- 7 minutes established and started by itself.

I had an induction. They are no fun. I would probably opt for a C-section if I had to do it again.

A friend of mine refused an induction. Unfortunately, her baby died in utero a bit later.
So, along with most of the voices on this forum, I would urge you to listen to medical advice.

If DH is not helpful, consider taking along someone who is. You’ll need all the help you can get with an induction.

You have to do what you believe to be best for you and your baby, nobody else, not even the doctors or midwives.

It’s worth noting though that there’s a wide margin of error for scans at this stage to determine baby’s size. There’s a lot of guess work.
I personally wouldn’t accept an induction for a suspected large baby before my due date, as chances are it’s not going to work without a fight. But I’m pretty anti induction and very much of the school of thought that if there’s something genuinely wrong, just get the baby out ASAP, don’t arse about trying to induce labour.

I've never had a baby but I would say to your husband" I've taken professional advice and this is what is recomended." I don't understand why some people want women to have the maximum pain in childbirth and risk the baby's life

Your body, your choice

Anti medical intervention? What was ‘his’ birth plan then - deliver the baby himself???

This is entirely your decision not your husband's. I've heard raspberry leaf tea can get things moving.

Anti medical interventions?? I wonder if he'll feel the same when he's asking for help in his own hospital bed.

It is NONE of his business.

And it is NONE of his mother's business.

Listen to your medical team. They are Advising what will be best for your baby and for you.

Do that.

You can say no to him being in the room.

@kakashixxkillua you're probably long gone, but just a tip. Don't discuss vaccination with this idiot, just quietly take your child. If the dr knows that one person with parental responsibility doesn't consent, they can't vaccinate without a court order, so keep quiet.

Why are enemas no longer given? No poop when my children were born - and human poop is very, very unhealthy e.g. Ancient Egyptians etc dipped arrow heads in it. Any resultant wound would not heal but cause sepsis and probable death.

Didn’t even read the whole post. It’s not his fucking decision.

Sorry, who's body are we talking about again???

I had a 10+lbs baby and if I could’ve had him by c section rather than feel like I was squeezing a turkey out of my vjay I certainly would have!

you do you. Tell your husband to feck off

At this stage it's all your decision! How DARE he suggest anything regarding your birth plan!!

Medical professionals will only recommend something they think is needed. They don’t do it cos they’re bored and fancy a challenge.

I was induced (due to reduced movements) and was expecting hell. I had the pessary and it worked a treat so didn’t need the drip. Baby came quickly and glad she did as there was an issue with the cord scans hadn’t picked up. So there’s your positive induction story….

as for any man having a say what happens to a woman’s body…. I haven’t the words to respond. I detest this. He should be supporting you to safely deliver a baby into the world under guidance of medical professionals who know a thing or two about it! Tell him and his mother to fuck the fuck off!!!

This! Does he not understand the risks of going against this soubd medical advice for the sake of you and your baby's health? Please inform him, and please do follow this advice.
Both mine were born alive and well as a result of being induced because of being 2 weeks overdue, there's a couple of very positives for you

Oh no OP. This is NOT good. Huge red flag. Please don’t listen to him. And his mother can f right off.
your body your choice.

is he controlling in other aspects?

I got induced on my due date due to consultant advice my little one was measuring big and I also have medical conditions and it was honestly the best decision I made. Little one was born and they were a normal weight not a large weight as predicted which was slightly annoying. They told me it could take up to five days for it to work it worked within around 5hrs I was already in slow labour though I just wasn’t dilated at all. I went for walks up hills and stairs and I also tried the sex bomb bath bomb from lush several times as it has ingredients that can induce labour but it didn’t actually seem to do anything although it could have done with me being in early labour when I got to my induction. if I was given the choice again to go for an induction or wait I’d choose the induction as I felt more in control of things even though labour is so unpredictable. Although it was uncomfortable it wasn’t unbearable.

it’s your body not your partners and at the end of the day as long as you are okay and the baby is delivered safely that’s what matters. good luck with the delivery and try not to stress too much about them saying baby is measuring on the big side it isn’t always accurate 🥰

So you followed the medical advice and he is against that? Alongside to his mom who also make comments about it 😵‍💫🫣

outch.

from now on, please make sure you make all the important medical decisions for baby. They sound bollocks.

It's your choice and it's being done for sensible medical reasons etc.
My ex was fuming re the date they gave me to be induced as he had a sporting fixture that day. We weren't even together and he had no intention of being there...but still wanted to be controlling.
Def your body and your choice. Good luck

It is not upto anyone else to have a say in what happens during your labour.
Your body. Your choice.