Those of you who have given birth - how did you cope with the pain? Better or Worse than you thought and do you wish you'd had an epidural?

[BearMama]

Its my first pg and I know I cant prepare myself just through other's experiences, but I'd be interested to know your thoughts.
I have read the "Women Unprepared for Childbirth" article and it has scared me TBH. Will be 39 weeks tomorrow so the due date is very near.

Also would like to know which was worse - crowning pain or contractions?

Really I wish I were one of those "Rather not know" Mums-To-Be but I'd rather be prepared for agony and do my damndest to relax and breathe properly rather than have some fuzzy idea that I'll cope.

Sorry - that should read "Do you wish you had/hadnt had an epidural" in title.

Don't tense up as that will make things worse.

It is almost certainly going to hurt but you can have pain relief and you will get through it.

That feeling when the shoulders pop out and the pain instantly stops is worth the wait and all the other pain.

It was worse than I thought, but I didn't want/need an epidural. I wanted to be able to feel the contractions/feel pushing the baby out, and I knew the pain was finite. Crowning did hurt, but it was over very quickly.

To be honest... It was much, much worse than I ever imagined it could be (sorry). But my labour went wrong anyway - I had a very bad reaction to being induced and ended up having an emergency section.

But I was pathetically grateful for my epidural - it was wonderful - brought me back from hell into the world again and meant I could cope with the following million hours (seemed like it) before the section was done.

But I've also got friends who literally pop their babies out - some just with gas and air and one with nothing at all!

Towards the end of my labour, when many hours had passed, I was kind of getting the hang of breathing through my contractions - the epidural was wearing off and I was back on gas and air - took me ages but once I'd figured out when to breathe it was much better and I obviously wish my labour had gone better wonder if I could get through another without a section (I always swore if I had any more dc I'd have an elective!).

Good luck - you'll be fine - concentrate on your breathing if nothing else - and I also found the TENS machine was brilliant for the first few hours!

there are many pain relief options between nothing and an epidural

your labour might be too quick for an epidural

also, it takes your labour into a different realm... much more medicalised

epidural has its benefits, but downsides too

have had one birth with that ended in em c.s, and one without that was a normal vaginal delivery.

if i had another baby i would try to get by with gas and air or nothing.

Worst pain was back pain - this was helped by having someone push with all their force on the small of my back.

To get through this pain I thought bring it on - give me your worst - and was ready to go with it. Crowning - no pain!! and contractions painful only when felt in the back.

Hi BearMama. I think its one of those questions where everyone's answer is going to be different as no two experiences are the same!

I had pethidine and gas and air with my DS and the pain was no where near as bad as I was expecting. I found the contractions quite uncomfortable (I mean u know they won't be nice)but getting stitches was by far the worst part in my experience!

but you get through it and you soon forget when its all over because you'll have your gorgeous little baby!

Good luck with it all xxx

This is a tricky one, and threads like this almost always descend into chaos.

Tell me to feck off if I am teaching granny to suck eggs, but no-one can relate to you how their pain would be managed by you. Better to discuss and consider all the options that are available to you, and think carefully about what support you may need for each.

It will hurt, but it will end and you will have a baby!

All the best!

It was far worse than I imagined tbh. Glad I had an epidural

i had an epidural for my DS. It blocked all pain. so much so that i could not feel when to push and my baby was distressed. i was very tired and needed an epesiotomy, he ended up needing vantouse and a night in scbu.
the epi had worn off by the time i was cut and then sewn up. i felt it all despite having ben given an injection to supposedly numb me.

With DD i had nothing. not so much as an aspirin. Yes it hurt, but no where near as much as i had thought it would.
the fact that i managed without pain relief is one of my proudest achievments.

If i were ever to give birth again i WILL do it naturally and without PR.

Far far worse than I ever imagined BUT I was dilating really fast and was fully dilated before anyone knew it so too late for an epidural.

Thought I would be better second time around having been there once and knew it would be fast and furious, oh know turned into a screaming, snivelling wreck as soon as the first contraction hurt.

But I'm doing it all again in July......

Gas and air is brilliant stuff. I found contractions less painful than I was expecting - I had had two attacks of pain from a kidney stone during my pg and that was immeasurably worse.

Best of luck.

the crowning pain was not that bad.. it stings, but you know the end is in sight...

i agree with BTLT's post about reading about the pros and cons of all the options

give birth in a yurt with some aromatherapy oils or in a consuitlant led unit with every drug known to mankind, as long as it is your INFORMED decison!

Much worse than I thought it would be. It is just impossible to imagine what it will be like.

I do wonder now why I never even considered an epidural. Didn't like the thought of not having some control but then the pain was sickening.

I found the contraction pain more difficult to cope with because I was at home with a slightly panicky dp, and no idea how long it was all going to go on for.

The crowning pain, although more painful, was easier to cope with as I was obviously getting somewhere! And I was in the birthing pool with a v. competent midwife and felt supported.

Despite the pain I'm glad I did it with just gas and air (and TENS before the birthing pool) - call me odd, but it is a good feeling knowing I have gone through that experience.

Having said that I had a straightforward labour (11 hours from waters breaking to birth) - I would absolutely not think any the less of anyone for having more pain relief - I found I could cope with it although it hurt. If you feel you can't cope then it's horrible and you should have what pain relief you want.

IYSWIM?

much much x 100 worse(sorry!) than i thought it would be!
had gas and air, wasnt allowed epidural either time as it was all happening too quickly

I'd say prepare for the worst then if the worst doesn't happen you will be very happy and grateful. Go with flow and don't get your heart set on anything to much because these things never go to plan.

I was so glad i had an epidural! I had been in pain for what felt like forever when they said i was only 3cm! so i didn't hesitate to ask for the epidural and will never see it as 'copping out.' Unfortunatly though, the epidural had worn off by the time it was pushing time so i had plenty of pain to indicate when to push.

Try not to worry too much and i wouldn't read too much about it as what the mind doesn't know...

I tried to refuse an epidural, but the MW said "why go through pain when you don't have to?" It seemed like a good enough reason at the time. But definitely pros and cons - had to wait for it to wear off so I could push, for one thing. And I couldn't move the whole lower part of my body, which wasn't very pleasant. My legs kept falling off the bed, so DH had to keep putting them back for me. Very weird. I also think the epidural contributed to me vomiting a lot afterwards.

As someone else, said, one of the worst things is the stitches afterwards. They hurt, and it takes forever.

I have heard some horror stories about stitches! Luckily i only tore a tiny bit so didn't need them.

It was me who said about the stitches. If u need them just keep the gas and air in your mouth and bite the tube if u have to!!!

Yes, the pain is bad, it's one of those things you cant explain until you've been through it. But as Lulu said, there are plenty of pain relief options, and ways of coping. Keeping mobile and breathing techniques are really important. For me, the crowning was the worst, excruciating part, but as you'll see, other people have different experiences. I didnt have an epidural - wouldnt have wanted to feel out of control and also didnt want to increase the chances of other interventions. Good luck!

you can get a partial epidural that was a numbs from knees ish to waist, so I could walk around. Had with ds1 as waters broke and not even started contractions - they got very bad. hire a tens machine from boots - abt 25 quid for few weeks - did help cos went on long. Ds2 was fast, too dilated by time i got to hospital. gas DID help at end, wseird rush thing when crowned, not bad as you think. Tens machine definite a goodsend tho. would happily do epidural again tho. hard with nothing - believe those that say it was bad, but you almost forget - brain cant remember the actual sensation or we wouldnt go on to kid number 2! Best of wishes, good luck!

I was given an injection of local anaesthetic before my stitches, so didn't feel them at all.

I just went with it. Trusted my body and knew that this baby had to come out and I needed it quick and easy. Ithd pain is intense with contractions, it absorbs all your focus. Close your eyes breathe and believe its one step closer, talk that baby out. Crowning, stings a bit BUT within seconds for me it ceased as I panted fast and breathed him out. Did the same for the next 2 kids. Never tore. Very quick super births. Very little pain ime