American giving birth in UK 1st time

[AshleyCali2Uk]

Hi Moms! I'll be giving birth in the UK for the first time in Jan 2024. I have 3 children I've given birth to in California so I know what to expect in the USA, but here in the UK I'm nervous. I read things like they kick you out as soon as possible, don't provide diapers. And being in a ward makes me nervous because I'm use to having my own room and space to turn the light off and have some peace and quiet. Can you please give me some advice.
What to expect for a c section mom. What to bring in my hospital bag. What's it like in a ward? Anything. Thank you so much.

It can be a bit grim, depending on the hospital and how busy it is.

Assume you must take everything you need, including all blankets, nappies, milk and bottles if not breastfeeding, snacks and drinks for mum.

Take earplugs and headphones, it can be noisy. You’ll probably want to leave as soon as you can and get home to peace and quiet.

if you have had previous uncomplicated births you may be able to have your baby in a midwife led unit, which is generally quieter.

Apologies, just read you are having a section. So it will not be in a midwife led unit.

Yes bring nappies, formula and snacks for yourself. There is no nursery so you will be expected to fully care for your newborn from the get go. Hospital food is generally horrible, get as much childcare as you can for your older DCs as there is an expectation that your DP will assist you in the first hours/ days.

But OTOH they are pretty good at saving lives if needed.

I didn’t want to leave you unanswered but I might not be too much help as I had my last dc 10 years ago! However I had a private room after a c section, it really depends on the hospital. Have you got a choice of hospitals? (I did given that I live relatively close to two hospitals with maternity wards, but am aware in many parts of the country there might be choice in theory, in practice there’s only one hospital within a hour drive).

have you registered with a midwife? They should be able to talk though options. And yes, you need to take diapers /nappies with with.

I stayed in 5 days and had my own room in the U.K. I’m pretty sure the hospital provided nappies/diapers, there was definitely milk. You may need to check, things may have changed.

It depends how busy the hospital is, you can ask for your own room but whether you get it may be another thing. Hospital food isn’t the best so you may find you’d rather be discharged or have someone bring you a take away.

Could you pay privately OP?

Giving birth on the NHS is much safer than going private. You will get basic care but great care. And it’s all free.

There will be variations by location so you need to talk to your MW about what to expect in your area. They will be used to explaining all this to 1st time mums, so have lots of details for you.

They aren't going to kick you out that quick if you have CS. They need to monitor things like your BP and wound closure.

I had homebirths after 1st and that 1st was decades ago, but I remember thinking it took forever to get discharged and that was a straightforward VB. There's no way they move hugely quicker now to let you out.

ime, They will not let you leave without seeing you have a good car seat strapped in correctly for baby. Since you can't even carry that yourself, you'll need someone helping you get home. MWs come visit very soon after birth at home, too. MWs hand over to health visitors a few weeks later.

American mom here… a fellow Californian too! Hello! ☺️

I’ve lived here for 25 years. DC1 is 21 and was born in Pasadena at Huntington Memorial (we went back to the States when he was born but returned to the UK when he was 3). I’ve had my other children here. My youngest is 9 so my experience is dated. But what I would say is if you’ve had 3 children in California, definitely go private for your baby that you’re delivering here, if you can. I had amazing care on the NHS. I can’t fault my midwives (incredible care), but it’s all a bit bare bones. If you can pay for private care, do it!

I'll be giving birth in Barnsley. The other thing is I'm due Feb 4 but they want to plan my c section for the week of Jan 29, but since nothing was available they pushed my surgery to FEB 8th in hopes something opens up. I wanted to cry bc I'm not use to this.

& thank you ladies I'll bring my own diapers and wipes. I'll start off breastfeeding then transition to pumping

& going private at this time won't be likely

Hi OP

Are you having to pay a too up to use NHS services? If so, it might be worth booking private. Always remembering that private hospitals over here do not have emergency units and you will be transferred to the NHS if anything goes wrong.

I had a C section about 6 years ago and was in for three days, until they were happy that my wound was fine and that everything was okay. What you get on ward varies between locations. What area are you in? I had a shared ward and wish I’d brought ear plugs.

The care was amazing. Midwives very helpful with feeding issues and after care visits were great. Are you booked in with a midwife? If you are then you get post birth visits from the midwife and the health visitor at home once they baby is born to check up on both of you.

I’d talk to your midwife about any concerns. Take everything you need with you. NHS won’t be all fancy but they have everything to keep you and baby well. Don’t go private, they don’t have emergency facilities or baby ICU

A big difference is the after care - a midwife will visit you at home. Mine visited me every couple of days for 10-12 days after birth, checked on my healing, helped with breastfeeding positions, weighed the baby.

That's partly why they can discharge you faster from hospital.

They’ll keep you in for at least 24 hours after a c-section and if you’re both well you’ll probably want to go home by then!
If you’re planning on breastfeeding you don’t have to bring formula milk as they do have supplies if baby struggles with the breast, but if the plan is formula then best to bring your preferred brand etc.
Post natal wards are pretty crap in terms of noise, other people’s visitors milling around and you’re expected to bring everything yourself and pretty much left to your own devices. It’s best if your partner can visit as much as possible to watch baby while you go to the bathroom etc (I hated having to leave DS when he was 4 hours old to try and waddle to the quite fair away bathroom - DH was looking after poorly DD who my Mum had been looking after all night).
Have a chat with your midwife though - some hospitals you can pay extra for a private room if one is available, and they have different rules for visitors.

You'll need to take your own diapers, baby clothes, wipes etc. I was happy with the hospital food, but I'm not a fussy eater. I didn't need to take blankets, the hospital was very warm.
I had my own room for the first night, but was then on a ward for two days, which was a bit noisy but quite reassuring. There were plenty of people around.
The nurses were great, very supportive and helpful.
I had a difficult birth but generally a good experience.🙂

I'll be giving birth In Barnsley
And I have a midwife Jane
I don't think I'll be able to go private at this time
Which sounds like a good idea that I'll have to pass up on.

Definitely will bring ear plugs and and sleeping eye mask or something

NHS or private? Just seen your update. If your private and complications you would be transferred to NHS anyway.

My NHS hospital only had private en suite rooms in maternity. Food was OK with a fairly extensive menu. Formula is only provided if your having issues with breast feeding not if you expected to formula feed. Nappies and sanitary towels aren’t provided but if you run out they will have some stock.

If you google hospital bag UK there are loads of lists.

Get a private ROOM in an NHS hospital, for sure. Hopefully there will be some available.

Ward not ideal as people are inconsiderate. But the NHS is great and we are not in the third world, you’ll be fine.

Okay having a midwife come to the house makes sense as to why they kick you out so soon. In America I'm after my c section I was there for 2-3 days. I don't mind it bc I was in my own room with an on suite shower and the food wasn't too bad.

Having some one visit you in the comfort of your own home sounds good.

Yeah I would have hated to have been kept in for more than a night after my c sections. I was absolutely climbing the walls. HEAVEN to be at home in bed waited on hand and foot.

Some units do have more single rooms but some will only have a few. You can ask to pay for these and it's not usually very expensive, but if there are other mothers who are judged to have a higher priority than you (infection etc) then you won't get one.

Some units allow partners to stay overnight and some don't. In principle I am 100% against this given that you may be on an open bay and there's no facilities for them - they may be sleeping in a chair - but I have to say in practice staffing is low enough at the moment that it's probably ideal to go for it if your partner is up for it.

You can tour units ahead of time so I would do that and ask these questions.

Ten years ago I would have been much more positive but there is no doubt that too many maternity services in the UK are seriously struggling.

I had an emergency c section at 3pm, and I could have left after lunch the next day if I wanted. I opted to stay another night, that was fine too.

I was in a 2 person room during my stay (as in 2 beds), but partners are allowed to stay too. The lady next to me had her partner stay both nights, on the chair that's provided. You are only seperated by a curtain. My partner went home the first night, but ended up staying the second night as he didn't feel comfortable with the situation particularly.

The midwives I had at barnsley were lovely. Very supportive.

Take everything that might be needed for baby and you.

I was out 24hrs after my c-section, my main tip is to ensure you're discharged with adequate pain relief so you can travel home comfortably. Your midwife will come and see you every day/every other day once you're back home so you should be well looked after.

I was told if I wanted to stay longer I could so don't worry about being pushed out too soon, but I much preferred being back home and had help from husband/family so left as soon as I could.

You all are so helpful. I have asked my midwife some of these things but honestly your answers are much better and detailed. My midwife is very nice but I have never had a midwife so I don't know what else to expect. 😂

When can I tour the hospital? Do I go through my midwife or call Barnsley hospital?
I'm 28w5days

Touring the hospital isn't really a thing people tend to do as standard in the UK, but I'm sure most hospitals will be happy to oblige if you ask them. Maybe speak to your midwife about it?