American giving birth in UK 1st time

[AshleyCali2Uk]

Hi Moms! I'll be giving birth in the UK for the first time in Jan 2024. I have 3 children I've given birth to in California so I know what to expect in the USA, but here in the UK I'm nervous. I read things like they kick you out as soon as possible, don't provide diapers. And being in a ward makes me nervous because I'm use to having my own room and space to turn the light off and have some peace and quiet. Can you please give me some advice.
What to expect for a c section mom. What to bring in my hospital bag. What's it like in a ward? Anything. Thank you so much.

they will give you codeine with paracetamol if you need it

Not my experience at all, having had two c sections at different hospitals and then other surgeries at another two hospitals.

Food has always been brought to me. Don’t think I’ve ever been somewhere with a dining room in the first place. And midwives handed baby to me whenever I needed help.

It really depends on the hospital.

Ahh yes, I think that was the longest walk of my life trying to get down the corridor for breakfast after my c-section.

Absolutely disgraceful that your hospital expected that from you.

Thank you!! I am sure you’ll be totally fine there. I’m guessing California to Barnsley feels like a big cultural shift in many ways! (I don’t know California well but I have visited and as I recall it ain’t nothing like Barnsley 😂)

you will find the staff are super kind and super friendly. Lots of very reassuring Barnsley accents 😊

good luck - I’m just gearing up to go in 🥳

We used to have to years ago in a big London hospital (but even then not for cs mums) but every hospital I’ve worked in since has taken meals to patients. If someone has been missed it isn’t intentional. Best advice is to just ask if anything you need, staff are busy but they are kind of assuming you would ask if needed. I remember the days when we used to have time to go round each patient , introduce ourselves and ask if anything they needed, that is the standard of care most staff wish they could give but they just wouldn’t get everything they need to get done most shifts these days

@AshleyCali2Uk mine are teens so a while back, but I was a birthing partner recently and not a lot had changed. We're in the midlands.

I had one in UCSF and one at queen Charlotte's in London.
At queen Charlotte's you could pay for a private room on top of free NHS stuff, not sure if that will be the case with a section as they'll need to keep a closer eye on you. There's no nursery baby is with you the whole time. You will be sent home ASAP. It will cost you nothing. The UK has more access to gas & air and I had a mobile epidural which wasn't available in California. No formula will be provided as you'll be encouraged to breast feed.
This is all based on 10+ years ago though... Good luck you'll be fine!

I'm assuming you are having an NHS birth, you can have a private birth either in a private hospital or in a private wing of an NHS hospital for about £8k.
It looks like OP is sticking with the NHS so probably not relevant to her but just wanted to correct this for anyone else… 8k would be what you’d pay the hospital (and that’s a conservative estimate). You would also need to pay the consultant which is around 10k so the all-in would be around £20k. Some private hospitals do offer cheaper midwife lead packages but they definitely wouldn’t be an option for a 3rd c-section.

I can't believe some of these comments. My daughter recently gave birth on the NHS. She had a birthing room with a double bed where her husband could stay the night! Baby was jaundiced so she stayed in for four nights but was given a private room after the first 24 hours. Midwives and staff were brilliant. Overworked, yes, but attentive. Food was adequate and there was a room with a supply of drinks, snacks, toast etc. I guess it comes down to where you live but not all hospitals are bad.

I definitely feel more prepared ! I'm happy the baby is with me the entire time I have never had my baby taken from me after birth. I think my main concern was what to expect after birth bc for me I think that's where the biggest difference is. That and scheduling my CS. But after hearing the stories and the advice it's not too bad now that I know what to bring to make it a bit more comfortable.
I've never had gas and air so that would be an experience if needed.

Oh my where was this hospital! 😊😊

I take it you haven’t been keeping up with the news then? CQC ratings published this week- 67% of maternity units are rated requires improvement or inadequate (up from 55%) so unfortunately the chances of bad care are far higher than good care.

Cambridgeshire.

Absolutely, there is some amazing care on the NHS but it rarely gets acknowledged. I have worked in NHS settings that offer that level of care but also other settings where unfortunately we can’t give women care much beyond the basics to keep them safe. Generally the care is good

It doesn’t mean all the care in those hospitals was bad, they just found certain failings at the time of the inspection. Most women at those units would usually say they had a positive experience. Absolutely, it should always be strived for care to be improved and women to be listened to if they feel they have had a bad experience, this is such a precious time in people’s lives but it isn’t true at all to say the majority of care is bad

That wasn't my daughters experience at Barnsley hospital at all

I gave birth a couple of months ago. All meals were brought to me on a tray and the order lady came back to me when I was being checked over at ordering time. They gave me nappies when I ran out and formula when baby struggled to latch. Every buzzer was answered within minutes and staff were very kind although definitely could have used quieter voices at night ...

I'm just wondering about the bounty sales person, the home visits, hospital providing formula etc because I didn't have any of this.

I was induced and discharged 24 hours after DD was born (May this year). I was expected to go to the maternity hub with baby on day 1, 3 and 5 of being home. This was a 30 minute drive each way and I was exhausted.

Good luck OP, I would take a light nightdress and a dressing gown (so you can pop it on if you get chilly but as PP's have pointed out, it's hot all year round on NHS hospital wards). Definitely an eye mask and earplugs if you're sensitive to light and noise. Some ready made formula bottles even if you're breastfeeding just in case, nappies, maternity pads/nappies for you.

@aftereights1 thank you so much! I'm so sorry they made you drive after having a baby! That's awful news. I think most of this is dependent on where in the uk you give birth. I don't think I'll have a bounty person In Barnsley lol 😂

I didn’t have a bounty person in central london? What is this? I’d be very annoyed if I have missed out on a bounty bar! I was starving after giving birth!!

Ha nothing to do with delicious bounties as far as I’m aware. I only had the Bounty lady come round with my middle child weirdly. She did a Christmas themed photo shoot with him (Santa hat on) 🙃 I was like uhhh….. this is weird but cute so crack on….. then she wanted to take all my info so I said tarra! It’s just data harvesting basically.

It depends where you go. As some hoapitals will offer private rooms postpartum.

I actually feel things are better in the UK No.1 no mahousive bills, and more hands off here. I have a friend in Florida who wanted nothing to do with hospitals and had all 4 babies at home with a Doula and Midwife. The expense, the stress and interventions were big no nos for her.

Here you can opt for home biths, midwife led center snd Consultant led. You have the choice.

Again depending on the hospital. But I heard some got private rooms, plus pads, per I bottles etc.

I had a midwife center births so took alp my own things. Only essentials are needed fitted all of mine and LOs things into a small carry on.
I used maybe 80% of those things so next time will pack lighter.

No you won't get a binder after a C section they offer Compression stockings only. You would need to purchase recovery aid equipment yourself.

Yes to a fan / large or small as windows are not usually opened in wards. And yea the heating is usually blazing. I worked in the NHS in many a hospital.

@MixedCouple thank you. For responding. In California I was never left with a bill. I had insurance and they took $50 out of my paychecks every two weeks. The bill came and it showed the expenses for the CS but said I owed nothing bc insurance paid everything every time. So it was never a worry. I'm not too worried here just anxious bc I'm in a new country and I didn't know what to expect. I'm so excited now. Joining Mumsnet has eased my nerves and I'm ready! January is just around the corner and I've got my list half way checked off and all the tips I've gotten have helped massively
Bc I'm telling you I would not have been prepared lol 😂 I love idea of even using cotton balls to clean the baby. I've never heard of that and look guard to trying something different.
Oh yeah that ab binder a nurse gave it to me my first CS I didn't know anything about it but boy oh boy did it have me walking around like I didn't have surgery lol so when I had my 2nd & 3rd CS I actually asked them to bring me on and they did. So I was wondering if that was a thing here. I don't mind bringing my own so I can get up and out of bed if needed to get the baby at night. Or just buzz the nurse lol 😂

Hi OP I know you have already got children but if you wanted to do antenatal classes the midwife will tell you about the free ones on offer- we had about 3 sessions I think at the hospital and they talked about what happens on the ward after birth, drug options etc which was useful and they did say you could visit the ward, also a session on breast feeding, we also chose to do private antenatal classes too for our first most areas have what they call NCT classes or privately run similar by a private midwife and we did this mainly to meet others in same situation at same time in same area and they encourage you to set up a whats app group and meet post birth with the babies and this was great as meant I had a ready made mums group for support and we did activities together and we were lucky in our group that I still see some of those mums weekly even years later! Obviously depends on whether that's something your looking for

I also had a C-section and I found the care very good they were all very helpful and kind, helping lift the baby bring food to you etc and I went home with good pain relief oral morphine- to get discharged they like to see you up and walking and that you are able to go for wee ok and baby is feeding well at my hospital they also had facilities for beast feeding mums and weren't pushy with the breast feeding but also really helped with that too if wanted and they snipped my baby's tongue tie whilst I was there

Congratulations and best wishes for your birth