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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

If you have an arsey comment about breastfeeding

373 replies

SunglassesPolarBear · 03/05/2009 12:43

come and say it here please, let's get them all out in the open and in one place.
So far today I have seen a comment along the lines of "don't know why you bothered" to someone who was please to have reached 6 months of excl bf, and an incredibly rude and unhelpful comment on a thread started by a woman who was worried that her supply would be affected by her DH giving their 10 day old a bottle of formula. Snotty comments (whether to bfers or ffers) are NOT WELCOME on those sorts of threads, so go on, offload here.

Oh, before we start, some myths I'd like to bust:

  • Improved health outcomes of bf babies are not down to social class - that has been accounted for
  • People bfing past 3 weeks / 6 months / a year are not doing it just for their own sakes
  • It's not only OK to bf in public "if it's done discreetly"
erm..sure more will come up
OP posts:
Original poster
SunglassesPolarBear · 03/05/2009 13:28

Don't get me started on MILs! I have been having an imaginary conversation with mine all the way to the supermarket!
No, this thread is for arsey comments in either direction, if posting them here means they don't go on support threads!

OP posts:
TrillianAstra · 03/05/2009 13:52

SPB I do imaginary conversations too.

Chulita · 03/05/2009 14:01

There's a lady at our mums 'n tots group who, if she sees someone bfing will put her hands up and back away 'oh, I'll leave you to it' with a look of utter disgust on her face. She also mocks cloth nappies and homecooked biscuits but it really ARGHS me off. Next time she gives her child a shop bought biscuit maybe I'll do the same.

Why is it that if you ff you're a failure and if you bf you're a hippy???? Why can't we just be a mum?

norktasticninja · 03/05/2009 14:03

Bfers are lazy, can't be arsed to get up at night or sterilize bottles.
FFers are lazy, don't want to have to do every single feed themselves.

Neither are my honest opinion, just trying to join in the spirit or the thread

Divvy · 03/05/2009 14:04

My breasts are for my dh only

bronze · 03/05/2009 14:06

Ive done both with all of mine

have to say I never got tutted at for using a bottle but did for breastfeeding in public (they couldnt bloody see anything either tosser)

only happened once though so I dont know where all these openly judgey people (in public)are on either side

not the right place but can I just say it was nice to sit and feed my tinyun with my sil yesterday while she fed her 6mth old. It meant I didnt feel uncomfortable feeding in front of my brother and could spend the whole time with them rather than hiding in another room to feed.

bronze · 03/05/2009 14:07

Divvy mine are for me only... to do what I sodding well please with

Chulita · 03/05/2009 14:09

I admit, I breastfeed cos I'm lazy. Trying to think of an arsey thing to say but the sun's out and I'm in a really good mood. Maybe I'll read some other threads, get grumpy and come back.

Divvy · 03/05/2009 14:11

mine too and my 9 month old. dh also, if he fancies it!

not at the same time, you understand

bronze · 03/05/2009 14:15

that would be dodgy

parsley3 · 03/05/2009 14:31

I have ff and bf'd so like to think I can see both sides but comments like these which I've had get me cross..."You lose weight if you bf" (not in my case-the opposite with me)"It's difficult to establish bf after a cs"(easiest after cs by far in my experience).Hate the way people judge/generalise without knowing the facts....And don't anyone now come along with STATISTICS to prove me wrong aaargh!!!

Jacksmama · 03/05/2009 15:01

I don't have anything arsey to say (I could claim to have a "live and let live" policy but really it's because I'm too lazy to put on my judgey pants) but have recently had an arsey comment said to me... "the nutritional value of breast milk is basically that of water after a year so why would anyone continue past that point"... this from a so-called alternative health professional...

slushy06 · 03/05/2009 15:08

I don't have a judgy comment but thought id let you know this thread has put a on my face

Jacksmama · 03/05/2009 15:22

Why would allowing a 9 month old andyour DH BF at the same time be dodgy?
Sounds merely adventurous to me

pagwatch · 03/05/2009 15:34

I never quite understand all the angst to be honest.
I breastfed DD until she was three and i never had a judgy comment from anyone. I did have a slightly startled reaction from a man who had come to measure my sitting room carpet.

I suspect that some people spend their lives feeling very defensive - perhaps they then act like a magnet to the tutting brigade.

Chose what you want to do and try not to give a shit what anyone else does. The world will be a much happier place................ ( although MN would fold in a month)

sarah293 · 03/05/2009 15:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ABetaDad · 03/05/2009 16:16

I fully support BF and FF as a method of providing a fully balanced and nutritional meal for a baby - there that should equally annoy all sides

Why is this so contentious an issue? I honestly do not get it. My DW did both with both DS1 and DS2 - there was no handwringing or agonising about it. We just made a decision together and got on with it. My DW did not find it a life changing experience - it was just a means of getting nutrition into a baby and it was boring for her so she stopped at 3/4 months. No harm done.

Original poster
SunglassesPolarBear · 03/05/2009 16:28

pag, I have reported your post, as you're right, that's dangerous advice for MNHQ's livelihoods!

OP posts:
Jacksmama · 03/05/2009 18:39

at reporting an equal-opportunity offensive post!!!

Jacksmama · 03/05/2009 18:40

And having read through the last posts , I do have an arsey comment - how on earth can breastfeeding be boring???

StealthPolarPig · 03/05/2009 19:01

I never find it boring, sometimes used to find it tying when there was somewhere I needed to be or something I wanted to do.
I also found it a bit annoying when I realised DS was upset by me watching Jeremy Kyle - he used to cry at all the shouting poor little thing - he has more taste than me obviously

DuffyFluckling · 03/05/2009 19:10

Out of nowhere, my 2-year-old solemnly informed me this evening that her dolly has a bottle of milk because she (dd) hasn't got any milk in her nipples.

parsley3 · 03/05/2009 19:56

On the days (whilst breastfeeding) when I didn't feel all floaty,100%organic cotton and earth-motherish about bf(which was often) it did make me feel like an old sow especially when I wanted to be getting on with other things.

ABetaDad · 03/05/2009 20:10

parsely3 - pretty much how my DW felt.

One day she just turned to me and said:

"Go to Tescos right now, buy some formula milk and then get some bottles and a steriliser from John Lewis - you better take over from me before I go mad".

So there was I, bloke, baby feeding novice, in charge of the future nutrition of my child. Seemed to work OK.

Not offensive I hope.

chequersmate · 03/05/2009 20:38

I remember one particularly bad day in my mixed feeding 'career'

I sat on a bench and got hissed at (I'm not joking) by an elderlyish woman whilst breastfeeding DD then, not long afterwards tried to buy cartons of Aptamil with my Boots points which is, as I now know illegal (or at least, it's not legal for them to offer it in this way?)

That was not one of my best days.