Tandem feeding support thread

[EauRouge]

In anticipation of some graduates from the BF and pregnant thread, here's a shiny new thread for tandem feeders to laugh, moan and puzzle over the ins and outs of BF a baby and toddler.

Things are going pretty well for us, we are having a bit of hair-pulling at the moment though. DD2 is 7 mo and loves grabbing hair. DD1 (3 in just over a week!) is not so keen and sometimes wraps her arms around her head.

Another issue is DD1's latch. She's not even close to self-weaning but her latch has been really lazy the last few months. I googled and found this which has been really helpful.

Aside from that, things are brilliant and I'm really glad I'm still BF DD1. It's my one-stop parenting tool for fixing everything

Thank you moonface

No idea what we are having, but has hoped it was arriving last night.. It was just teasing me I think.
EauRouge - 5 toddlers is a houseful! Goodluck and happy birthday to you dd1.

Ds2 woke twice last night and he usually sleeps through. Thankfully for me he no longer nurses in night. Managed to both get back to sleep till 8.30!! He's a Velcro child at moments. He want to be near me pretty much all day. Bless him, he knows that baby coming soon

Aw, it is a tough time for toddlers. How old is he? I really think tandem feeding helps to ease the transition to big brother/sister.

Not so much a toddler, he is 3y9m preschooler if I'd bee asked if I'd still be nursing at his age I'd have laughed incredulously. I got the bumgarner mothering your nursing toddler book whic helped so much. Dh is so very supportive, so informed and encouraging.

Awen, where I come from 3.9 year old is still very much a toddler. Formal schooling doesn't start until the year children turn 6.

Where are you from? He is still very young IMO and if he needs it he needs it.

I'm South African (not that SA is bf friendly or that natural term bf is the norm there)

Ah, hope the party went well, eau, and Happy Birthday to your dd. 3 years old- I bet you felt quite emotional!
Hi, Awen. You are lucky to have an informed dh, I wish mine was - he can be supportive, but my still bf dd is definitely a source of friction for us.

Kelly, has your cot turned up yet? How is it? I had a look and am very tempted! I agree that the yellow bits are pretty hideous though!

Moon, so glad all is going well. Your ds sounds adorable, doesn't it melt your heart to see your child being so loving and open? I have just been so proud of dd1.

When do they stop being toddlers and start being pre-schoolers then? I don't expect DD1 to wean until she's school age so don't be embarrassed about BF a pre-schooler It's great that your DH is so supportive Awen, mine is too and I always think how lucky I am. I read that book Breastfeeding Older Children when I was pregnant and very hormonal with DD2 and I went all mushy after reading the dads' comments in there, telling DH how amazing he was etc. It took me a while to live that one down

Party went well, thanks loopy. I'm completely exhausted and both the girls are too wound up to sleep yet. DD1 isn't 3 until Monday but we've got a special day out for her planned and I'm sure I'll be really emotional all day

happy birthday eau's dd.

Loopy it is SO adorable! They did the hand holding nursing thing today. And ds ran back out of the house shouting "baby!" as though i had forgot and left her in the car, when i was just following behind! He adores her in a way i didn't realise was possible at his age tbh!

We had a difficult night, dd has found her appetite so wanted to feed lots and ds woke for ages so balancing the tricky but we got by thanks to dh fielding ds.

My milk has come in so ds is very pleased, having stuck at it through the lean times of the pg! And isoon.ink-- hope he's starting to get over novelty as he hasn't insisted on joining in every single time dd nurses...only most of them! I'm struggling to manage that tbh. Often i just let him on and pass dd to dh if needs be. I'm hoping it'll settle down soon. But maybe i'm being an optimist.

I am also lucky to have a very supportive dh. I have so much respect for those who continue to bf because they know it is in their lo's interest, in spite of dp's not being enthusiastic.

I am so tired! Roll on bed time.

x post...happy birthday for monday eau's dd

I've come back to ask another daft question if you don't mind.

38 weeks now and DDs feeding seems to bring on cramps. They're bearable but noticeable.

Can bf at full term start labour? Can I ask how many weeks you were when you went into labour?

Kelly, I think it is like all the other things like pineapple, sex, nipple twiddling etc in that it will only induce labour if you are just about to start anyway.

ds2 was born at 40+3, although I had been having contractions since 39+6

Kelly - I'm due 22nd am 38+4 :) getting impatient now lol.

Ds2 is so fixated on my boobs, keeps checking them and saying "for baby". Not sure how I'd handle him asking go nurse when baby is, as he's down to a tiny snaffle at bedtime. Don't really want to increase it. His technique is not great now either, like he don't latch like he used to iykwim

DD1 went back to pretty much exclusive BF for a couple of weeks when DD2 was born- it was bloody tough but thanks to a comfy sofa and a supportive DH and a mountain of chocolate I got through it. It's normal for toddlers to regress a bit when a baby is born and this is one way of regressing. It might not happen for you if your DS is only BF once a day (DD1 was feeding a lot more than that) but be prepared just in case.

I got loads of really strong BH during feeds towards the end. It was bloody uncomfortable, I don't miss it one bit! Not long for you now though

yy Eau, ds1 was the same. It was easier to go with it and let him feed whenever he wanted for the first couple of weeks. The tears and distress if I refused him were not worth it!

Feeding them both at the same time (which sometimes made me want to throw them both off and run away screaming), was the lesser of two evils. And it was the quickest way to shut up two screamin bairns at the same time soothe them both

Eek, hoping he doesn't but at least I'm forewarned. It's nice to be able to talk about it as I don't know anyone in rl who have or are tandem.

Yes mawbroon, sometimes it's the only way you can watch TV get some peace. One of the most valuable skills you can learn is how to tandem feed, drink tea and use a remote control all at once. Reading is possible when only one of them can grab (just hold the book in the other hand) but once both of them can grab it's pretty tricky.

Awen, I can't remember if I asked you this before but is there a LLL group near you? I've met a couple of tandem feeders through LLL. It's nice to get a real life demonstration of where everyone sits!

Thanks everyone.

I have had a two hour nap with DD who nursed a fair bit giving me cramps. Feel great after the nap but got up to use the loo and have lost some of my plug!

I know, it's still likely to be ages but it's quite exciting! It happened midlabour with DD and I was pethidine-drunk so didn't get a good look at it.

DH freaking out mildly!

Woohoo, another baby coming! Good luck, hope all goes smoothly. :)

Well I don't think it's labour but just in case I have just cleaned the fridge, bathroom, assembled the co-sleeper (reserving judgement for now, will have a look tomorrow) and sent DH to the supermarket with a massive list of things we "need".

I have also switched the boiler over to nuclear-hot and can confirm when cleaning the bathroom it had taken effect (ouch!).

Nursing DD to sleep now. More cramps but she's almost asleep so hopefully I can rest soon too.

Sorry - totally non-feeding related post!

It must be labour. Only a serious case of denial could give you all that energy.

Not sure if I want it to be the real thing or not. My step mum was going to have DD tomorrow morning and I was planning to lounge in bed....with tea and cake and definitely no bloody Dora the Explorer!

I am officially a tandem feeder

Congratulations and what fantastic news Kelly . My DD2 was born at home too must be something about tandem nursing DD2 I think!