Common racist comments you hear in 2023?

[SleepDreamThinkHuge]

Compared to 30 years ago, how is racism different today?

For me, racism terms such as the n word p word are less used than they were 30 years ago. However, people have looked at other avenues. See comments below.

1. "You have a chip over your shoulder" every time someone mentions racism or their lived experience it goes straight to denial mode. You are blamed for your lived experiences and told to get over it and how UK is not racist.

2. "The UK abolished slavery. slavery was a long time ago." Every time someone tries to put forward a view of reparations of people who are still suffering from the effects of slavery they are shut down. "that was a long time ago we have changed and evolved."

3. "I feel like a foreigner in my own country." Which is probably one of the most stupid statements considering that over 80 percent of the population is white. I always answer if you feel like a foreigner how do minorities feel?

4. "name the racists" commonly said for Megan Markle that she should name the racists she claimed in the Royal family. But lets be honest if you did that the other person in whatever circumstance would just deny it and ultimately you will not be believed and be called someone who plays the race card and tarnishing other people's careers.

5. "Why do black people have their own spaces if white people had it we would be accused of racism" This is commonly said by the same people who are not as vocal when other groups have their own space e.g. women, LGBT groups etc.. It just seems like whenever black people have their own space people have to put them down. Take Ngozi Fulani the media made it seem she was the bad person people argued why her charity helps black people suffering from domestic abuse. Sad how she was forced out Sistah Space due to the abuse she faced but the media never mention that and the racism she had to face.

6. "Racism exists in all communities" this is another common one used and is a whataboutery technique. We have seen this with people like Kanye, KSI recently but what people forget there was a lot of criticism from the black community with their actions. So to suggest the black community or any other community does not do anything about racism is for the birds.

7. "My best friend is black" This is something you would hear from the EDL or Britain First. But you would be surprised how often you hear this by a lot of people. Just because your friend or relative is black, Muslim, Asian etc does not mean you cannot be racist. Even if you are a white mother and your child is mixed race does not mean you cannot be racist. It is baffling how a lot of people seem to forget this and think that my saying I cannot be racist because of this automatically means they cannot.

I hear you. The problem is because they may have no notion of the ways in which racism can manifest. They may just understand it as name calling, and not understanding that it is so much more. I have said it before on here, nobody has ever called me the n word, or such like, yet I suffer from racism frequently. Just little things that add up over the years. Customer service not being so friendly, smiling etc, when I have just witnessed how the person, who happened to be white, in front of me was treated in a more agreeable manner. Assumptions being made about my person, because of the colour of skin I happen to be living in. Yes it does seem as though we are speaking into a void, having to give examples to get some kind of understanding, even then some people will still deny our collective voices.

I don't. You have not been gaslighting people. What you have said has been very insightful. I do have a problem with those that troll though, unfortunately there are some posters who have an issue with people trying to get support from others who know what issues they may be going through.

I read a book a few years ago called Black like me, by John Howard Griffin. It is a true story about a white man who undergoes a transformation to appear as a black man, so that he could experience for himself how black people were treated. It is well worth a read. I cried in parts because he describes how just everyday things were made more difficult for the black man/ woman. I thought I knew a lot as a black person. It was quite difficult reading parts of the book, getting a real sense of how degraded the black man has been.

My favourite is when people are talking about "blonde" hair in relation to beauty. The wording is always interesting and most of the time, people don't realise how it comes across.

To clarify, in reference to beauty as a generalised standard. This is both in real life and here on MN. The generalised way of thinking has not left the building.

Yes! I see this so much.

I think the same about when people talk about curly hair here and there’s always quite a few that refer to curly hair as “a rat’s nest”, unkempt, should just be cut, , etc.. especially on little boys.

The blonde thing is definitely irksome, especially with the belief only white people can have blonde hair or red hair and it can’t possibly exist naturally outside of them.

I haven’t experienced racism since I left the corporate world 7 years ago and I hadn’t experienced racism until I entered the corporate environment.
I live in a diverse area and was educated multiculturally, my social demographics are with people who are similar to me, the media I engage in is relevant to my demographics. My child also goes to a culturally diverse school and has a similar environment and hasn’t experienced racism so far either.
The comments/statements in the original post is light in comparison to what I encountered in the corporate world

I know this post is about common racist comments but I'd like to share something and potentially someone can give me advice as this is not so much about comments but about someone's behaviour that I think is downright racist and unacceptable.

Close to where I live there is a couple who have a totem pole with a golliwog on it, and a confederate flag right in front of their house which is on a main road. I've called the police and nothing has been done.

I'm a minority in this village, and have spoken to others in the community but people don't share my outrage and have just brushed it away when I raised this.

I don't think I'm being petty and believe this is a display of racism. I googled and this guy has been reported before, even appearing in the daily mail standing his ground that his totem pole and confederate flag only affects "woke" people. His Neighbours actually supported him.

Is there anything I can do? I'm shocked as I don't understand how in this day and age people think this is ok!

"Deport them" on any police FB status where the surname isn't smith

Where to, back to Burnley where they were born?!

That's shocking @bumblebeebuzzy, but it's very hard to get people like that to realise the consequences of their actions. I found that article in the Mail and the guy sounds a lost cause.

But surely this is illegal and a hate crime? Because I have reported it to the police and there has not been any action which is what I find puzzling? Also sad that people in the village do not seem bothered by it.

To be honest most of the racism I encounter is from my own community - especially my own mother 🤣

I'm mixed (mother is from Kenya and father is half white, half Indian) and I'm extremely 'light'. So much so that I've been told that I could 'pass for white from a distance' 😳

My husband is not just white - he's extremely white. Blue eyes, white blonde hair - you name it. My mother (who isn't particularly dark herself) is absolutely delighted by this as she places pale skin at a premium and has already suggested that my impending first born will be 'light, bright and damn near white'.

I have a copy. Its a great book.

White working class boys have it worse

1/4 black or any other fraction or percentage term

I’ve been told are you one of those woke people
also lefty propaganda etc

I hear you. The problem is because they may have no notion of the ways in which racism can manifest. They may just understand it as name calling, and not understanding that it is so much more.

Yes totally agree with this! Sometimes also they refuse to see racism as anything else but something as blatant as name-calling.

I have heard the No4 from the OP, ‘name the racists’ about Meghan a lot as I frequent the royal ( Meghan bashing ) boards. Apparently her absolute worse mistake is she didn’t deal with the racism properly.
I’ve only been back to Mumsnet a couple of months and in the first 3 days had 3 different posters be blatantly racist to me about my culture, I’m Maori. Deleted swiftly at least. But the different ways of being racist aren’t understood by moderators.
Yesterday two posters were blatantly racist, one said Meghan Markle isn’t a good example of a black woman, the other said she has undone all of the good work and achievements POC have made in recent years. Apparently she is to blame for an increase in racism. I see this a lot, where black people are held to a much higher standard and blamed for the behaviour of racists because they almost encourage it. Now we are ‘examples’ and if we want equality we must all at all times deal with any racism or mistreatment in perfect ways or we are setting back the cause. While the remarks were removed, as they were laughing at me for saying it was racist, I referred to them as white posters mocking a person of colour. One poster known white the other wouldn’t say and reported
my post which was deleted for ‘assuming a racist was white’ and not being ‘in the spirit’. So it was ironically another example of a person of colour being punished for not dealing with racists and racism in a perfect way, as I was being laughed at for identifying the racism.
All over that board today is ‘ I can’t say anything now for fear of being called racist’.

Your last sentence resonates with me, Whaeanui, soundly because that phrase I have often heard used, laughingly, in the past by blatant racists who are either totally unaware or think those listening are on their side! As a white English person I always found it disconcerting that they assumed I would agree with them. I could handle it well enough now but when I was young, the racists were generally older and more dominant, like parents generation, and I found it difficult to find the words; I'd go quiet and often quite red :-). Oh hindsight and all that.

There is nothing wrong with Meghan, Duchess of Sussex, she's great and a good role model to all. I'd be proud to have her as a daughter. We here in the UK have lost two stars; with their humanitarian ideals she and Harry could easily have been international ambassadors for the UK. I wish them both well.

Yes I have white passing siblings who often get spoken to initially as if they’re fully onboard with it too and the change in the way they’re spoken to when they say they’re Maori is really revealing. It just blows my mind people can be so open and think every white or light person will join in with them. But maybe it’s that common when I’m not around huh.

That board is a disgrace @Whaeanui and it's always the same people isn't it? They're usually found across other threads denying racism too. I love how they think it's ok to compare "uppity" Meghan to "dignified" Michelle Obama, thus perpetuating the whole idea of the "deserving" black person. Or they claim to be legal or historical experts whose only talent is copying great swathes of text from Wikipedia.

I recently reported a spiteful thread and was told by MNHQ to hide it if it bothers me because the subject is of interest to other posters and can sometimes result in "education". Basically MNHQ don't give a shit.

Apparently her absolute worse mistake is she didn’t deal with the racism properly.

I never understand that logic. How was she exactly supposed to deal with it? The only one who took a stand was Harry while the rest compares it to what Kate endured and then ignored the blatant racism and double standards towards them. It was obvious she was going to get a hard time the moment their engagement was announced. I could have turned it into a horrendous drinking game the amount of times her mother’s heritage was mentioned by the British media and the tabloids that followed. The woman couldn’t do anything right and the whole bullying scandal I always find suspect since only in the UK there was an issue yet nothing in the US or Canada and if she was that bad, she wouldn’t have gotten as far as she had even with her father’s connections in the industry. He was just a lighting director if I remember correctly.

And the amount of people who say they feel sorry for her father is ridiculous. Would they say the same if he was a Black man? I doubt it. As it is some of them cast very unpleasant aspersions on her mother who has shown herself to be nothing but supportive and maintained a dignified silence through it all.

@phoenixrosehere yes, the family is known to behave appallingly to staff because they are exempt from equality act and laws protecting workers, we’ve also seen them speak rudely to staff
, but suddenly a majority white staff apparently find the first black lady to be a bully? One of those complaining got dismissed for misconduct after she was found to be using Meghan to get freebies. But nobody wants to hear that she herself was subject to bullying within that institution, oh no, then that’s using ‘the race card’. The way that board dismisses Harry because of his past racist comments which he’s fully horrified by, and because he ‘minimised’ her story of racism that they don’t care about in the first place. He didn’t of course, they never called anyone racist even though they actually were.
Yes you’re right, there’s a lot of ‘experts’ on that board apparently, although I tend to think they’re full of it

@PinotGroggio I know, feel sorry for her father? Who tried to blackmail her? Who sits with his other kids doing interviews about her, kids he barely sees and one of whom wore blackface to mock Meghan. He’s revolting.
I report the racism there but yeah MNHQ will only remove certain things and a bunch of them laughing at black posters who call out racism is absolutely fine. It’s a really disgusting board and totally hostile atmosphere for black or brown people.

They also seem to have decided he's a drug addict based upon having tried coke in his youth and occasionally having a joint! Wouldn't that make half of MN addicts then? And then quoting the Heritage Foundation as some sort of bastion of liberalism that's working against white privilege. The Heritage Foundation!!!

I digress but it also shows how racists only care about racism when they can use it to make a dig at people of colour. Look at the recent furore over Diane Abbott. Yet when the incident at the palace with Ngozi Fulani happened, the same posters were falling over themselves to accuse her of all sorts rather than condemning the racist behaviour she was subjected to.