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Black Mumsnetters

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Common racist comments you hear in 2023?

1000 replies

SleepDreamThinkHuge · 28/04/2023 06:48

Compared to 30 years ago, how is racism different today?

For me, racism terms such as the n word p word are less used than they were 30 years ago. However, people have looked at other avenues. See comments below.

  1. "You have a chip over your shoulder" every time someone mentions racism or their lived experience it goes straight to denial mode. You are blamed for your lived experiences and told to get over it and how UK is not racist.

  2. "The UK abolished slavery. slavery was a long time ago." Every time someone tries to put forward a view of reparations of people who are still suffering from the effects of slavery they are shut down. "that was a long time ago we have changed and evolved."

  3. "I feel like a foreigner in my own country." Which is probably one of the most stupid statements considering that over 80 percent of the population is white. I always answer if you feel like a foreigner how do minorities feel?

  4. "name the racists" commonly said for Megan Markle that she should name the racists she claimed in the Royal family. But lets be honest if you did that the other person in whatever circumstance would just deny it and ultimately you will not be believed and be called someone who plays the race card and tarnishing other people's careers.

  5. "Why do black people have their own spaces if white people had it we would be accused of racism" This is commonly said by the same people who are not as vocal when other groups have their own space e.g. women, LGBT groups etc.. It just seems like whenever black people have their own space people have to put them down. Take Ngozi Fulani the media made it seem she was the bad person people argued why her charity helps black people suffering from domestic abuse. Sad how she was forced out Sistah Space due to the abuse she faced but the media never mention that and the racism she had to face.

  6. "Racism exists in all communities" this is another common one used and is a whataboutery technique. We have seen this with people like Kanye, KSI recently but what people forget there was a lot of criticism from the black community with their actions. So to suggest the black community or any other community does not do anything about racism is for the birds.

  7. "My best friend is black" This is something you would hear from the EDL or Britain First. But you would be surprised how often you hear this by a lot of people. Just because your friend or relative is black, Muslim, Asian etc does not mean you cannot be racist. Even if you are a white mother and your child is mixed race does not mean you cannot be racist. It is baffling how a lot of people seem to forget this and think that my saying I cannot be racist because of this automatically means they cannot.

OP posts:
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HypocrisyRules · 25/05/2023 00:27

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

HypocrisyRules · 25/05/2023 00:29

Sorry @Socrateswasrightaboutvoting tech's been messing up my post

HypocrisyRules · 25/05/2023 00:35

Also sneakily copied and pasted in the middle of the night when mnhq would be asleep. The desperation 🤣🤣🤣

<Cue excuse of being busy and only had time at 12midnight.> 🥴

Socrateswasrightaboutvoting · 25/05/2023 00:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I know 😂 I am not wasting anymore of my breath.

HypocrisyRules · 25/05/2023 00:49

Agreed. 😴

skullbabe · 25/05/2023 05:20

LadyKenya · 24/05/2023 22:19

I agree@skullbabe . The constant deniers of racism on MN is shocking. Either the constant deniers do not recognize the racism in its many guises, which I understand will be the case with some people, who have no direct personal experience of racism. But to continue to deny it even when it has been pointed out to them numerous times, well that is going somewhere else. I personally think that when they keep hammering on, and refusing to take on board what is being said, well I just think that they obviously have an issue themselves. This latest discussion here about the coverage, or lack of, in the press, (PAPERS) about the poor lady that has now died following the collision, is a case in point. It speaks for itself.

It does indeed speak for itself.

skullbabe · 25/05/2023 05:23

PinotGroggio · 24/05/2023 23:09

WRT MM, a certain poster has even started a thread about her on the FWR boards, asking if posters consider her a real feminist. I'm pretty sure I haven't seen this poster on those boards before so I think it's safe to say they're slightly deranged.

OMG I have just seen that. They just can’t leave her alone can they? It’s odd.

LilyMumsnet · 25/05/2023 09:03

Hi all

Please can we ask that you avoid discussing other threads elsewhere on the boards? We have a blanket ban on threads about threads as it makes things quite tricky to moderate. If you have any concerns about post(s), please report them to us using the report button. We're always more than happy to take a look.

AnAngelAtMyTableWithMe · 25/05/2023 09:13

LilyMumsnet · 25/05/2023 09:03

Hi all

Please can we ask that you avoid discussing other threads elsewhere on the boards? We have a blanket ban on threads about threads as it makes things quite tricky to moderate. If you have any concerns about post(s), please report them to us using the report button. We're always more than happy to take a look.

That's fine but it is happening on the Royal boards so it seems odd they can do it there but the black mumsnetters are held to a different standard. In addition, if we wish to discuss racism we experience here, it will inevitably involve discussing other threads. Can you confirm that you will not allow us to discuss racism we experience on your site, here, in the special corner set out for us? Thank you.

HadalyEve · 25/05/2023 10:14

@LilyMumsnet This isn’t a thread about another thread, this is a thread about racism we experience in 2023 and if you look at the entire thread it isn’t just on racism we have experienced on MN threads, but also elsewhere.

Can you please let us know if your post was due to a complaint? And if so, what was the substance of this complaint?

HypocrisyRules · 25/05/2023 10:19

Mnhq has posted the same post on the Feminism thread.

Some people wanted to post what they like but weren't happy for us to post something similar here in return. So posts were reported. Thankfully mnhq have also deleted the hypocritical posts and I'm happy to no longer discuss that particular thread as long as I'm/we're not discussed there first.

DojaPhat · 25/05/2023 10:37

There's a certain demographic of women who absolutely cannot tolerate MM. They think she is underserving of her position and really feel bewildered that someone such as herself can be in the position she is in. "I'm not racist but there's just something about her that I don't like, I can't quite put my finger on it though but it's not about her race - I don't care if you're blue, green or aubergine"... Curious really.

DojaPhat · 25/05/2023 10:40

I can understand to some degree the reluctance to permit discussions about other threads on here because there's a current thread my post was deleted on about the concept of BAME. Perhaps a better angle would have been to begin a thread here to discuss why BAME as an umbrella term helps no-one; currently loads of posters are agreeing with the most blind-sighted intellectually dishonest post about a 'PeRsOn Of CoLoUr'.

Socrateswasrightaboutvoting · 25/05/2023 13:34

DojaPhat · 25/05/2023 10:40

I can understand to some degree the reluctance to permit discussions about other threads on here because there's a current thread my post was deleted on about the concept of BAME. Perhaps a better angle would have been to begin a thread here to discuss why BAME as an umbrella term helps no-one; currently loads of posters are agreeing with the most blind-sighted intellectually dishonest post about a 'PeRsOn Of CoLoUr'.

Freedom of speech apparently...

Reugny · 25/05/2023 14:06

Socrateswasrightaboutvoting · 25/05/2023 13:34

Freedom of speech apparently...

There is no free speech on a commercial website owned by someone else....

Lndnmummy · 25/05/2023 14:09

Karen round 38

SleepDreamThinkHuge · 25/05/2023 18:45

What shocks me is that the same people who will go on about women violence, barriers women face will totally ignore what people of colour face - "race baiter" "liar" "making everything about race." Imagine putting on a mumsnet thread "making everything about gender" you will not get away with that and quite rightly so why is okay to say "make everything about race." The amount of racism I have seen here goes unchallenged from "immigrants being rapists" "asylum seekers more prone to rape" "race baiters" etc... Don't get me started on when you tell white feminists that feminism is not inclusive because it focuses too much on white women and things through their lenses. It is "no ALL women face similar barriers" SMH

OP posts:
Socrateswasrightaboutvoting · 25/05/2023 19:23

SleepDreamThinkHuge · 25/05/2023 18:45

What shocks me is that the same people who will go on about women violence, barriers women face will totally ignore what people of colour face - "race baiter" "liar" "making everything about race." Imagine putting on a mumsnet thread "making everything about gender" you will not get away with that and quite rightly so why is okay to say "make everything about race." The amount of racism I have seen here goes unchallenged from "immigrants being rapists" "asylum seekers more prone to rape" "race baiters" etc... Don't get me started on when you tell white feminists that feminism is not inclusive because it focuses too much on white women and things through their lenses. It is "no ALL women face similar barriers" SMH

Any attempt to push back on those narratives is met with a pile on of twisted literal mindedness and whataboutery.<<sigh>>

skullbabe · 25/05/2023 19:36

I spent a lot of time on Twitter in the 2010s when #solidarityisforwhitewomen was a thing - spending time on the feminism boards really reminded me of it and I’m sad that almost 10 years later plus ca change. 😟

HadalyEve · 25/05/2023 19:40

Don't get me started on when you tell white feminists that feminism is not inclusive because it focuses too much on white women and things through their lenses. It is "no ALL women face similar barriers"

Oh yes, it’s always the “but everything you listed is something women face too” or “the reason white women are at less risk of x is due to class not race”

SleepDreamThinkHuge · 25/05/2023 20:23

HadalyEve · 25/05/2023 19:40

Don't get me started on when you tell white feminists that feminism is not inclusive because it focuses too much on white women and things through their lenses. It is "no ALL women face similar barriers"

Oh yes, it’s always the “but everything you listed is something women face too” or “the reason white women are at less risk of x is due to class not race”

Exactly this they try and dismiss the struggle. Stats such as "black women are more likely to die during birth" is often met with "well that is not solely a black issue women in general are not taken seriously" SMH

OP posts:
HadalyEve · 25/05/2023 21:05

SleepDreamThinkHuge · 25/05/2023 20:23

Exactly this they try and dismiss the struggle. Stats such as "black women are more likely to die during birth" is often met with "well that is not solely a black issue women in general are not taken seriously" SMH

God yes, I had this exact conversation with a young woman the other day at a fundraiser and you know what she said? She said “Oh I thought they proved that more Black women die in childbirth because they’re less healthy and tend to be obese and have diabetes because of their lifestyle and culture.” I gave her the death stare and hope to never see that Karen again.

Socrateswasrightaboutvoting · 25/05/2023 22:05

skullbabe · 25/05/2023 19:36

I spent a lot of time on Twitter in the 2010s when #solidarityisforwhitewomen was a thing - spending time on the feminism boards really reminded me of it and I’m sad that almost 10 years later plus ca change. 😟

I admire your patience.

HadalyEve · 26/05/2023 06:04

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I agree we seem to spend the most on hair care products as Alaffia are eye wateringly expensive (£33 for shampoo) but a little goes a long way and Amazon U.K. carry them. They keep my curls from breaking or drying out.

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