Black women's message to the royal family: I believe Meghan **title edited by MNHQ at the OP's request**

[Detanglinghairtonight]

I name changed, I am a black woman and request primarily black women to send a message in support of Meghan to the royal family. We do not have to explain why we believe Meghan, this is a safe space/board for us.
post edited by MNHQ at the OP's request

Oh OK. I haven't followed the story that deeply (mostly because I find it either invasive or infuriating). I do think, though, that the RF has a 'trickle down' nature. I guess what my main point is is that so much of the anti-MM sentiment is so obviously thinly veiled racism - inc. (especially) on MN.

I believe her.
I think she has helped expose something nasty and up to now something which has been hidden or ignored in some sections of British society and media. Some of those who challenge racism, sexism or other isms in others have jumped to defend 'the firm' and therefore had their own prejudices exposed. Not something nice to witness. This is primarily a site for parents and yet the member of the family whose morals and behaviour raises still unanswered questions when it comes to underage young girls elicits nothing like the volume of responses that Meghan does.

YetAnotherSpartacus

I believe her. My parents are/would have been the age of the senior royals. One of my parents wasn't white. This parent wasn't very dark-skinned, but even as a child, I knew they were not English (as such). I was always corrected - 'No, they are white'. About five years before they died it came to pass that a distant relative outed them. Their reaction was 'I know and I was always scared you'd come out black'. It was a generational thing for them and I remain so sad that they were unable to acknowledge their heritage and pass it on. I believe MM because of that insidious and deep-seated racism that pervades so much*

How sad that your parent couldn't be their authentic self. Although I hope he was happy.

DP is mixed race and there are some similarities regarding how he was raised.

YY to insidious, deep-seated racism, and MN being an example.

It's doesn't matter what a PoC has to say, the remit is to shut it down and ridiculously argue about our own lived experiences.

It's others that are obsessed about race in a weird way, and they aim to put that on the shoulders of Black people.

It's not our remit to take it on board and I'm glad MM further raised awareness of it.

More people are having to realise their big mouthed racist "free speech" has consequences. That's why they can't stop chattering where their input isn't even required.

I'm here for it

I'm white, mother to mixed race children and I believe her. The colour my children might be when I was pregnant was widely speculated on by all and sundry, sometimes even by total strangers. I felt like my children were an exhibit in a zoo when they were babies, everyone wanted to look to see 'how they'd turned out'. It was offensive to me and their father, I lost family over it.

@Rege

I think if white posters come on here to start debating, black mners only have themselves to blame for engaging. You ignore and continue with YOUR conversation. Unfortunately, it seems some can't do that and allowing this back and forth to continue.

Do you know, this comment and the ‘black only' sentiment as well as comments above sound racist 🤷‍♀️

@DeeCeeCherry

TheWarbler Why are white women commenting on here? I thought black women requested their own board

I think they're trying to stage a coup😁

Let them rattle on between themselves, doesn't matter😴

This and some of your other contributions are incredibly passive aggressive, juvenile and regressive

You also come across as a racist and not demonstrating any principles of inclusivity and tolerance: something that I think - seeing as the woman herself is the topic of this thread - Megan Markle would find inappropriate.

VerityWibbleWobble
I'm white, mother to mixed race children and I believe her. The colour my children might be when I was pregnant was widely speculated on by all and sundry, sometimes even by total strangers. I felt like my children were an exhibit in a zoo when they were babies, everyone wanted to look to see 'how they'd turned out'. It was offensive to me and their father, I lost family over it

People can be so woefully ignorant. It's not as if they haven't seen mixed race children before (& even if they hadn't!) yet their innate stupidity and racism comes to the fore.

Good for you, at least your children will know their Mum stands for something. It's important.

I think they're trying to stage a coup

I think it’s more like the rest of MN is minimising the possibility of racism and this is hopefully a safe space for those who don’t want to have to justify their #ibelievemeghan stance over and over.

@DeeCeeCherry “their innate stupidity” hmm. Innate?

[quote Topmum66]@DeeCeeCherry “their innate stupidity” hmm. Innate?[/quote]
Quite....

Lessthanaballpark
I think it’s more like the rest of MN is minimising the possibility of racism and this is hopefully a safe space for those who don’t want to have to justify their #ibelievemeghan stance over and over

Ah, ok. Makes sense.

Not that I think anyone should waste their own time or even feel somehow obliged to justify over and over.

But yes, racism minimising can only be a good thing so long may it last.

They're like Zebedee, jumping around everywhere sticking their oar in hoping to spread the poison😁.

Meghan is living rent free in their envious heads, serves them right.

But yes, racism minimising can only be a good thing so long may it last.

I think by racism minimising they mean minimising it as in denying racism, or trying to explain it away as "that's not racism, it means something else?" which I don't think is a good thing if people do that.
I may be wrong in my interpretation though though so apologies if so!

DeeCeeCherry

It reminds me of the excellent piece "Why I no longer speak to White People about Race".

Not to mention that entering into conversation with defiant white people is a frankly dangerous task for me. As the hackles rise and the defiance grows, I have to tread incredibly carefully, because if I express frustration, anger or exasperation at their refusal to understand, they will tap into their presubscribed racist tropes about angry black people who are a threat to them and their safety. It’s very likely that they’ll then paint me as a bully or an abuser. It’s also likely that their white friends will rally round them, rewrite history and make lies the truth. Trying to engage with them and navigate their racism is not worth that.

As a woman with a white mum and BAME father it definitely works both ways as is displayed here by anyone with an opinion or questions being ‘silenced’ by being accused of racism.

My wonderful parents taught me so much better than to rely on the inverse hypocrisy displayed here.

Please, with compassion and open discerning eyes and ears learn the difference between a ‘defiant white racist’ and those who simply don’t like MM or choose either to/not to believe her sometimes questionable claims.

Quaagars
But yes, racism minimising can only be a good thing so long may it last

I think by racism minimising they mean minimising it as in denying racism, or trying to explain it away as "that's not racism, it means something else?" which I don't think is a good thing if people do that.
I may be wrong in my interpretation though though so apologies if so!

I took it as minimising instances of racism, via the way it was worded. Yes open to interpretation I guess

I’m white so my opinion probably isn’t relevant but I just don’t see why she would lie about all the micro and macro aggressions she’s suffered and whatever anyone says there was a massive and obvious difference between press reporting on her and Kate for example. Serena Williams is forever having her athletic and powerful figure described as fat or unpleasant as well. These things need to stop as well as the treatment of black and mixed race kids like they are an exhibit, hair touching and colour speculation no thank you.

@Topmum66

As a woman with a white mum and BAME father it definitely works both ways as is displayed here by anyone with an opinion or questions being ‘silenced’ by being accused of racism.

My wonderful parents taught me so much better than to rely on the inverse hypocrisy displayed here.

Please, with compassion and open discerning eyes and ears learn the difference between a ‘defiant white racist’ and those who simply don’t like MM or choose either to/not to believe her sometimes questionable claims.

Why should black people be the one to educate though? If you choose to come onto a black section specifically you can learn by reading. A lot of the time I don’t feel people want to “learn”. If there’s something I want to learn it wouldn’t spring to mind that I’m going to search on MN for the answer.....

Please, with compassion and open discerning eyes and ears learn the difference between a ‘defiant white racist’ and those who simply don’t like MM or choose either to/not to believe her sometimes questionable claims.

It’s also ok to dislike something that someone does without being racist. I say this as a non- white person.

Sorry bit of a bold fail there.

Why should black people be the one to educate though?

Because who else truly knows and has lived racism? I can try to get my education understanding from a white person, but have can they really know and understand? Or I can try to get my education and understanding from a black person and their lived experience. Please don’t turn away those who want to learn and be educated.

Yes, you can learn from reading, but is there something wrong with asking questions with the will to learn? Maybe you wouldn’t immediately turn to MN to learn, but behind the screen are real people with lived experiences. MN is but one source.

How can, not have can

@Orchidflower1 thank you

It’s important to know just because we’re multicultural we can all still support each other and respect differences of opinion

The OP has a lot of women who agree with her and that’s fine but she is not representative or the authority on BAME views

If someone doesn’t want to educate or be a spokesperson m then they shouldn’t feel obliged due to the colour of their skin. But please don’t close the doors to people who want to be educated.

@May17th there are different ways you can learn depending on your appetite for it and your disposition

My niece knows that some girls who have touched her hair didn’t mean it to be offensive so she explains to them, there are others she feels it in a not so innocent way and she simply slaps their hand away and tells them not to touch her and theyre not worth explaining to.

Prince Harry used a few racist slurs and had to be sent on courses to help him see his ‘ot was without malice’ wasn’t good enough.

minou
DeeCeeCherry
It reminds me of the excellent piece "Why I no longer speak to White People about Race".

Not to mention that entering into conversation with defiant white people is a frankly dangerous task for me. As the hackles rise and the defiance grows, I have to tread incredibly carefully, because if I express frustration, anger or exasperation at their refusal to understand, they will tap into their presubscribed racist tropes about angry black people who are a threat to them and their safety. It’s very likely that they’ll then paint me as a bully or an abuser. It’s also likely that their white friends will rally round them, rewrite history and make lies the truth. Trying to engage with them and navigate their racism is not worth that

An excellent piece indeed. Says it all about the futility of even attempting to engage with 'defiant'. Certainly not worth it.

I haven't read through the book yet, this is a reminder that I must get around to doing so.