Due April 2009: Episode 20 - Angst Ridden Fruity Fornication

[SmuttyNuttyTaff]

sorry couldnt help myself

on the last episode of april 2009 mums to be ..........

OddEyes & Babypringle are possibly going into labour Very Exciting!

Kaz & Skiingone - posted birth stories

lots of Fruity Smut, I was caught by the Fruit Fuzz and restrained

Lots more smut.......smutt...smutt

BB & WFH still havent popped (though we now have a birthing ticket system) We have to wait our turn

Boffin's AP causes more greif, beatings were handed out to a soundtrack

More commune talk

Morphine chasers with lots of soundtracks that take you back to the good ol' days

Springy & Suprise have gone to Brum for the weekend.

contractions/BH's/ movement/ailments aplenty

sorry if i have missed anything out ....

We have no intention of potty training either, but DS asked for big boy pants today. He can just about tell us when he's actually pooing, but wees are a mystery. sigh...................

MrsFossil - Thanks for the update from Barb. Really great news.

Nutty - Hooray for nutcat coming home.

Conker - I'm glad DS had a lovely time. My sister took her two at Christmas and they said it was fab. 'hixting again'

Brettgirl - You are wicked.

Surprise - Good news about the crib and bicarb bath.

Boff - Like Nutty, i'm happy to do any so pick me a random number. Do we have a deadline?
Do you know what's wrong with poor DS?

FreshHell - That sms to be the deal in our bed too.
Aren't bath poos great fun!

I found a three-day old poo in the bath the other day ((

that says a lot about about my housewifing skills as much as anything

can you tell its age by looking at it? or was that the last time anyone had the opportunity to poo in the bath?

amazing how poo and wee become a normal aspect of one's life after children...

MathsMummy probably carbon dated it whilst marking a pile of A level scripts.

She is clever like that.

Sitting here with an ice pack on my groin. SPD pain quite ridiculously bad, it has to be said. Treated myself to an extra codeine tablet for morale purposes. I think Felix may be lying on a nerve or something. I could well do with going into labour tonight tbh.

Evening

Conker - welcome back glad you had a nice holiday

Boffin - well done to your ds for saving

Haircuts - OMG i sooooooo want my hair dyed its unreal i have been a natural brunette for far too long!!! and have not touched a styling product for months. i can see myself going mad post baby and ending up with rainbow hair to apease the hair gods

WFH - hahah just deserts for your dh indeed possible hangover and toilet training and kids party sweet revenge

Boffin - at carbon dating poo , i only just got up have been asleep since 3 due to the pain, think bambino has engaged though so it wont have helped, morphine now though ahhhh then back to bed lol . I'll join you with the labour! yes please! is the ice pack helping??

I am not sure it is actually. I have taken it off for a bit so my fanjo doesn't get frostbite LOL!

I am willing myself to go into labour right now but it is not working.

evening all

boff I'm easy on the threads - just let me know!

great news about barbarelly's LO's

Any news from babypringle she will be being induced now if all going to plan!

Yay for cat coming home Nutty - you can tell she is 'your' cat LOL dirty little stop out!!!

Boff sorry about the pain - how is DS1 now?

WFH very good of you to let a smelly DH back in bed

MM LOL at poo in the bath - got a very funny look into my future life....

good day today, went very quickly and have elephant feet from walking around!!!

Hi BB. DS1 is tucked up in bed with a toddler cup of apple juice. I think a good night's sleep will do the job.

LOL at labour willing - I actually led in bed last night saying to whoever is up there - please please just let my waters break tonight!!! but alas was nothing there this morning!!!

I just polished off a massive chelsea bun!!!

mmmmmmm

Boffin - i agree frostbitten fanjo is the last thing you need!!

BB - you said it not me lol glad you had a good day

BTW we had our most rubbish ever attempt from a child at running away today. I am still PMSL thinking about it!

DS2 packed his little giraffe suitcase and his matching backpack with the essentials, and announced his imminent departure. This is because we are crap parents who don't meet his Lego demands sufficiently well.

I advised waiting until his diarrhoea was better, on the grounds that there were no toilets around for people sleeping rough in our village, but he declined to take my advice. He did however delay his departure long enough to put the Mr Men edible pictures on the fairy cakes we had made that afternoon.

There was then a touching scene in the front hall as DS1 said his goodbyes. "I will miss you, bro" he said, as they hugged, "but I suppose I will see you at school on Monday".

DS2 then proffered his face to me for a goodbye kiss. I asked him to let us know if he got married at any point, and maybe bring his future wife around for tea.

He then left. He paused. He shouted through the letter box "Thank you for the ice cream and all the nice stuff" and walked about 5 metres.

He paused again and waited near the car on the driveway.

After 90 seconds he decided he had run away for quite long enough and returned to the fold. We all had a fairy cake and lived happily ever after.

Apparently we're not so bad after all.

BOffin - ROLF bless his little self lol at not meeting his lego demands BAD Boffin parents so sweet of him to do "proper" goodbye's awwwww

ahhhh bless DS2!!!

He was funny. It took him about half an hour to leave!

Awwwwwww Boff that is the funniest, cutest, sweetest, most touching story ever... what a character your DS2 is!!! I want one!!!

We're all very quiet today - DH and I have been to B&Q and have been nesting and DIYing all day. Shelves are up, pictures hung, bathroom reorganised - things are looking good!

I wouldn't mind the baby coming at exactly 37 weeks actually - I know that I'll miss being pregnant for loads of reasons but I'm also keen to meet her in person... come on lil one, out you come!!

Kitty - miss being pregnant!!! are you mad!!!

on the count of the 3 ladies .......we can make this happen ......come on .......PUSH!!!

Boffin - was thinking of the thread editing......you could do your (pregnancy) chapter for the Book of Boff from you're thread postings alone!! just add bits here and there

I had forgotten about the Book of Boff.

Now Nutty, you are not supposed to yell "push", according to my hypnobirthing teacher, you have to say "open", as in "my cervix opens easily".

oooohhh oooh! i know! it could be OPEN and OUT like some sort of walkie talkie code

hey ladies! how are yous all? loved that little story of your son boff!

I'm feeling well weird the last few days. been feeling sick and off my food since thursday, even been waking up in the night feeling nauseous. And my back is so sore and I feel so heavy that I can't get comfy in any position. grrrr. went to doctors yesterday to get checked out and she said I had a tunny bug. But then last night I got a sore throat and a temperature. Now I've been in bed all day, still nauseous, still throat, and so uncomfortable. Keep worrying it's labour but it's prob just a weird virus eh?

do you think OPEN sesamea would work too?