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Original poster

why do people judge us young mums?

259 replies

youngmumtobe · 04/03/2009 19:23

im 19 and due to have my first baby on the 24th march but im being induced on the 12th. i always get judged by people as i dont look my age. wheneva i go out people stare and make comments it realy makes me paranoid.i dont get why people judge without knowing our situation i mean im still living at home and plan on stayin here for a good few years. im going back to college and work after iv had baby as i hate being on benifits.i just dont get why we are judged we make good mums aswell just coz we are young it dont mean we not gna be as good as a older mum.

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Original poster
youngmumtobe · 05/03/2009 22:42

alicecrail thanks and i think i will just ignor all those people who judge. tanx for advice xoxo

OP posts:
paolosgirl · 05/03/2009 22:42

Do you feel bullied youngmum?

Original poster
youngmumtobe · 05/03/2009 22:44

LucyEllensmummy thank you. i will defo come and tell you about my lil boi. im going to bed now. this thread has made me relize alot more after soo called adults are sooo childish and need to grow up more than me. thankyou for your surpport. xoxoxo

OP posts:
Original poster
youngmumtobe · 05/03/2009 22:45

paolosgirl actually yea in a way but to be honest it has made me relzie what sort of people are out there and all im boverd about is me and my lil boy.

OP posts:
LucyEllensmummy · 05/03/2009 22:46

you have handled yourself admirably on this thread. You will make a great mum xx

noonki · 05/03/2009 22:48

your right youngmum, hold on to that. People that judge are not worth worrying about.

Do your best by your child and yourself.

Those that matter will support you those that don't werent worth worrying about in the first place.

paolosgirl · 05/03/2009 22:53

I regret that you feel that way, but hopefully this thread has also made you appreciate that having a baby is no trivial matter; that it requires hard work, support, a huge financial commitment from you (and not the government) and that a baby needs consistent role models who are not going to flit in and out of it's life, and who can provide it with security and most of all stability.

I wish you and the baby all these things.

LucyEllensmummy · 05/03/2009 22:54

good job the op started this thread then paolo - otherwise she wouldnt have realised

catinthehat1 · 05/03/2009 22:56

LEM, let me take that spade off you...

noonki · 05/03/2009 22:56

very patronising paolosgirl.

LadyOfWaffle · 05/03/2009 23:02

Make sure you come back - you will get loads of support here. You can email me - my MN name at hotmail dot co dot uk if you want to chat away from here

LadyOfWaffle · 05/03/2009 23:04

THe scary thing is no one seems to be rude because they think it's a troll, they are actually being awful towards someone they believe to be genuine but beneath them. I am disgusted.

Zebraa · 05/03/2009 23:05

Have only read original post so will reply accordingly... as long as you're the best mother you can be and you support your child however you, as the childs mother, feel is best for your baby, then who cares what anyone else thinks? If they want to judge you for being a young mum then let them, they're obviously not very nice/fair people.

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy.

BettySwollux · 05/03/2009 23:07

What a bunch of absolute fucking bitches!! No need to name names - you know who you are.

I really hope that you post for help/advice one day and everyone tells you to fuck off!

YMTB best of luck. Please come back, we arent all screaming harridan bitches.

paolosgirl · 05/03/2009 23:08

Not patronising, just truthful.

BettySwollux · 05/03/2009 23:10

LOW, I couldnt agree more.

paolosgirl · 05/03/2009 23:19

Nope, nothing to do with thinking anyone is beneath me. No one is this life is beneath me or above me.

Zebraa · 05/03/2009 23:20

Get a life!

paolosgirl · 05/03/2009 23:23

So therefore each mum's opinion counts as much as the next so I think it's ridiculous that some mum's get so mad at others for just giving their opinion.

So don't get so mad, Zeb!

Ewe · 05/03/2009 23:24

Youngmum, I wasn't sure earlier if I could post links to rival sites or not but fuck it as this will prob get deleted anyway this younger parents board was very helpful to someone I know and you may find it more supportive than Mumsnet.

Good luck with the baby!

abbierhodes · 05/03/2009 23:34

I've just read this thread in horror!

To be honest I do have opinions about teenage mothers, and I do think that it is best to have kids when you are older and in a more secure position in life.

However, I am disgusted by some of the comments on here. Paolosgirl, catinhat, you need to read this thread from start to finish. If you can't see that you are being total and utter bitches, then I think you need help.

I'm sure your bitterness is a wonderful example to your perfect children, glad to hear you are bringing them up to be tolerant and accepting of others.

OP, I wish you all the best.

ScottishMummy · 05/03/2009 23:35

youngmumtobe-congratulations,hope all proceeds well.not long now are you excited?wee bit scared too?

being a mum is epic change
you have to change,your responsibilities change
you shift from me to we

age,yes you will encounter prejudice.but tbh thing about being a mum is everyone wants to chip in their nugget of wisdom (whether you want it or not)

you plan to continue with your education,good idea. you need something for yourself.being a mum is great but do prioritise yourself and your career.makes economic sense and get you meeting friends and progressing.complete college increase your earning capacity,your choices

dont beat yourself up to be perfect,aim to be good enough
trust your instincts about your baby
dont be shuvved about by well meaning oldies

ForeverOptimistic · 06/03/2009 10:40

The OP is obviously a troll. Quite amusing.

ScottishMummy · 06/03/2009 10:43

why do you think she's a troll?

Original poster
youngmumtobe · 06/03/2009 11:00

thankyou for all the surpportive comments and the not so. it has made me relize what sort of people there are out there one`s who pre judge and pick at peoples spelling and grammer.

if you had read the whole thread you would know why i am staying at home and no i dont like being on benifits i have worked since i was 16 and did so untill i had to be signed off so get your facts straight before you go shouting your mouth of about my situation when you dont know the whole storey.

and tho the poeple who are going on about me not being with my babys dad and being with a diffrent partner does it really matter wt least my son will have to parents not that it is any of you busness but the reson im not wif my babys dad is because he turnted violent so no i didnt stay with him that is not how i want my child brought up. at lest my partner now has been there for me through out my pregnancy and is goin to stick around.

as for the people who say i feel as tho the gov owe me somthing no i dont at all!

for those who dont like the way i spell or my grammer if you dont like it you dont have to read it so pissoff and grow up as you seem to be the ones who have a very imatture attatude not me.

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