December 2008 Once you pop you can't stop

[Veggiemummy]

surely most of us will go on this one

Oh yeah Orange blow rasberrys through the contractions you look stupid and your DH will be covered in spit if you are facing him but def contributed to good birth for me. Also if you are having trouble getting a grip on pushing open your mouth make a fist with your hand put it in your mouth and blow onto it. again not attractive but hey there is a small person coming out of your bits. And when head is crowning stop pushing and let the baby and gravity do the rest the midwife will help you know when to stop pushing (or fist breathing) and you can pant through it. If anyone tells you to push at that stage ignore them, you will have less chance of tearing, really use the gas&air to help you breath if you need to. My DH is astounded by the last bit having seen it first hand. He keeps telling friends how amazing it is that my bits just opened up for DS2, I have asked him to stop as I need to talk to these people again and don't want that image of me in their head.

Verso - if it's not too personal a question do you know roughly how much weight you gained in this pregnancy? I was also a size 18 before getting pregnant and have really tried to limit my weight gain but have still put on almost 2 stone. I am hopeful that the baby and all the fluids will make a good hole in that but I think it might be a while before I can squeeze back into my old clothes and the thought of having to go clothes shopping with a tiny baby does not appeal Oh and good luck with the appointment tomorrow, sounds like she is feeding fine now though so they should give her all clear.

AbbyMeg ? poor you, I think I?d have passed out without food for so long, and when you were already anxious about the CS. Hope all goes well for you tomorrow and you are holding a baby by 9am.

Reban ? so sorry about the stomach bug, and the ?everything going wrong at once day?, things do tend to have a habit of snowballing, but you should get your car back tomorrow and at least it didn?t wait to go wrong until you were in labour properly.

Kayz ? first timer here so no idea if it will work but lots of people swear by swaddling to help settle new babies.

Am back please excuse my continued bad spelling I reckon i have aquired pregnancy dyslexia.

Abby what a pain try and have a good feed up tonight and lots of luck for tom.

Reban poor you I had the D&V a few wks ago bloody horrid when up duffed to be vomming.

Kayz try swaddling him or taking it in turns to eat your dinner have you tried using a sling he is just a few days old and needs to be close to his mama, or put a t-shirt you have been wearing into his moses basket so he can still smell you.

Verso good luck at the jaundice test sounds like you are doing brilliantly.

Major sending you labor vibes have you thought about asking to go in daily for monitoring instead of being induced? Its waht I am going to do.

abby so sorry that you were all geared up today (and hungry) and didn't get to meet your baby. Best of luck tomorrow!

veggie your birth story was fantastic! Am taking on board the fist breathing and raspberries tips!

verso and katie and kayz hope you get those babes to settle well tonight. Part of me can't wait to have my baby in my arms...and part of me is dreading the inevitable "what do I do now". Hope a good night awaits all with small babies....

reban what a shocker!! How horrible for you. Hope you are recovered and you go into labour only once the car is back.

Jam Arti major and Orange and anyone else overdue - lots of labour vibes (though Orange sounds like you are on your way!).

ladyT step away from the scales as that way madness lies . Spanx are super but (i think it was ZJ's tips from earlier) are spot on and I would worry about them near a new scar. Enjoy the Ivy though! Not been in ages but hope there are some good slebs there. Last time I saw only Nicholas bleedin Lyndhurst fgs!

Lol at people dreaming about other people on the thread. I dreamt about poisondwarf the other night after we exchanged a few late night posts on the thread. We were both late for antenatal yoga ... and she was still pg, oddly. Hope all well with you PD and that you got some answers on the b'f worries.

Kimberley I have been the same as you - totally nesting today (have acheived so much, but when I started reorganing the cans in my pullout larder I knew I needed to stop). Hope it is lovely seeing your family tomorrow and that you have the baby soon (if you would like to )

I am happy to have this baby after DD's nativity play tomorrow (2-3pm). She is one of 30 clouds and has been told to wear white knickers so they don't show through her white tights....(clearly it would be too high maintenance to ask people to supply flesh colour pants, as of course that is the only true solution to pant/bra glare..)

Ou est Bisou???

well hello!
Sorry I've been an bit of a stranger...just caught up with what I've missed...congratulations to those with new arrivals.
Phoebe has just gone to her daddy for a post-feed-keep-me-upright-or-I'll-vomit cuddle, so my hands are actually free for me to type!!!

Well I may as well give you my birth story, but those who haven't popped yet may wish to skip this in case my honesty puts you off!

Having thought I was in labour on Tuesday night, only to be told I was 1cm dilated on Wednesday morning, things died down until Wednesday evening. Had contractions which got more and more regular and painful and ended up going into hospital at about 3am. Was 3cm dilated on arrival and was told I would next be examined 4 hours later. Got more and more painful and strong and less bearable over a few hours. I had paractamol, gas and air and Meptid injection, and anti-sickness jab too as I'd been vomiting since before we even left home! Felt like nothing really touched the pain, although I guess I don't know what it wold have felt like without them. At 8.30 was 7cm and waters exploded with next contraction. Then tings went quite quickly (in their terms...felt like forever to me!) and 2 hours later after much very painful pushing, the head came half out. They said I needed an epesiotomy but then the rest of the head came so didn't need it, then shoulders, body etc. That was 10.17am. Had skin to skin then the injection to speed up the delivery of the placenta. I'd decided in advance that I didn't want that injection but when it came to it I just wanted it all over. Was examined and found to have torn badly so had an hour of stitching, then had a hemorrhage so had to have an infusion of something to stop the bleeding. Remained on delivery till 5pm then was finally allowed to postnatal ward. Had IV antibiotics coz of GBS. Had to say 48 hours because of GBS then was allowed home on Saturday. Since then:

the bad stuff: can't wee without crying because it hurts so much
can't tell when I've finished a poo (sorry TMI!)
walk like a duck
feel like all my innards are falling out when I stand up
have more haemorroids than ....something with millions of haemorroids!
weep every day
worry that Phoebe is doing odd movements, general anxiety etc...
neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed to sleep
don't even recognise my downstairs anatomy - seriously there's a bit hanging down which i think should have been stitched - will need MW to check it tomorrow - hurray - the indignity continues!

the good stuff:
have a delightful bundle of a daughter...I love her so much I cry
dd1 has been fine with it all so far!
BFs going well although have the cluster feed through the night thing too

the good list is smaller but the things on it are bigger!!!

I feel like I didn't 'do' labour well, possibly because my expectations were wrong - it hurt more than I thought it would, I was more vocal than I thought I would be...and people keep saying 'how amazing - you had a VBAC' like I'm some superwoman, but I would honestly say I'd rather have a c-section and am not brave or clever at all. It's just very different - c-section tummy pain was for me more tolerable than all this under-carriage pain. But everyone's different.

Have just realised that this is a massive post. Sorry about that!!!! Obviously I've had MN withdrawal and am making up for lost time!!!

Oh and Kayz - Phoebe wouldn't settle in her basket for the first night so last night I put 2 massive books under the stand to raise the head end so she's on a slope and she slept a bit better last night - although it could be coincidence! It made me feel a bit more confident too because I figured she was less likely to choke as she's quite a vomiter!

Thank you so much for your birth story Trace and big hugs to you about the bad bits - a tear combined with piles is just freaking awful (I know!). Is there any way you could get someone to prescribe you a lidocaine based painkiller for down below? I have one called "Instilligel" that my m/ws gave last week for piles (but is also what they gave me last time for piles and tear). If you can't get hold off one I have an extra unused one I could pop in the post? I also used chilled Witchhazel liquid (just get in Boots) on my pad and that gave some relief too.

And you know what, you sound like you did very well in labour. Hope all the good bits start to totally outweigh the bad very very soon!

abby so sorry you didn't get to meet your baby today, that is rotten luck. All the best for tomorrow, have a good night's sleep, you'll need it

majormoo sending you labour vibes. If it makes any difference I found the gel was a good way to get things started, hopefully they'll start you on that before they have to use the drip. My EmCS was due to me having no waters and the cord being round his neck, nothing to do with the induction. fingers crossed you go by yourself, lots of bouncing on a gym ball and walking

arti big hugs to you and sending you 'immune to sickness bug' vibes.

Katie best of luck with tonight's sleepathon. Love your postitive mental attitude !

Orange all the best

LadyT virtual slapped wrists to you for weighing yourself. I have not weighed myself since I got pregnant as not worth the worry. IKWYM about still wanting to be 'you' even though you have a baby. I went and got my usual weekly manicure last week which made me feel so much better (despite flabby belly), I'm sure your Ivy trip is just what you need

reban glad you are feeling a bit chirpier, what a rubbish weekend.

DS has had an out of character unsettled day today. He has had lots of very 'squirty' nappies (one of which required a full change of clothes for me as well as him !!!). He is really white and has now finally settled. Any ideas ? Do you think I have eaten someting that has upset his tummy ? What foods have experienced mums found affects their babies ?.. Also I have been unable to get him to latch onto right boob all day, by evening it had leaked all over my top as it is clearly too full of milk - I expressed from it but am now worried about mastitis as it is really sore . If I had mastitis would that be a reason for DS to keep rejecting that breast ?... any advice most welcome.

x-posts, Ooh trace big hugs and thanks for your honest account of a VBAC. Sounds like you did a great job missus, don't be so hard on yourself. The crying thing will continue if you are anything like me - 12 days post-birth and I can still cry just looking at my wee bundle, am so happy .

mibbles - my mw said if they refuse to feed from one particular boob you can sometimes fool them by holding them as though they were going to feel from the other. ie, to try to get him to feed from right boob, try holding him rugby ball style under your right arm and he might think he's getting left boob! Worth a try? Not sure about the mastitis thing - I know if they're just reallllllly full it hurts a lot but not sure how you know if it's mastitis - maybe if your boob is hot? but I think people advise to continue feeding through mastitis anyway so i don't think that could be putting him off. no idea really!

and another thing about my labour...I was stuck on my back on the bed because previous section meant I had to be monoitored.

Just had my first mince pie of the year and it was very yummy indeed. My favourite bit is the middle - wish they made them bigger with barely any pastry and loads of middle!

thanks trace I'll try that.

kayz what was the top tip for getting baby to feed if they have fallen alseep ? DS drops off to sleep quite a lot when feeding so it would be good to know.

Trace I think your birthstory sounds great very inspiring well done. Only thing I would say is there is a time and a place for doing an episiotomy and that time is not when the head is half out. Why didn't they do it before she crowned may have saved you extended tearing. Get a jug to pour over your bits while you wee the water will dilute the wee so less stingy use nice warm water.

Mibbes they sound like normal breastfeeding poos can be very frequent with some serious propulsion. But they should be a bit curdy looking so may be that not getting the hind milk. Not sure about taking from one breast without looking at latch, would be a good idea to get a breastfeeding worker to have a look. Wouldn't be mastitis as it doesn't bother them if your boob is infected but you would know if you had it. Do you have any symptoms you are worried about?

Mibbes It was to tickle them under their chins. Apparently it stimulates their sucking reflex.

Trace: thank you for posting your birth story, hope the MW can help on the tearing/stitches. I had an episiotomy with DS and it took a while to heal and walking was v painful too. You may find it gets worse as the tissues swell, then it will improve again. Baths with lavender oil mixed with milk helped me - one a day if you can find the time! I was also on my back for DS's delivery and it really didn't help - again, they wanted to monitor me (meconium in my waters and hb dropping) which was why. I found it hard to know what to think of my labour, on the one hand many things did not go according to plan (and were poss mismanaged) but on the other I got a healthy DS ... give yourself time to recover physically and mentally.

Reban: I reckon that must be all your bad luck out of the way for quite a while.

Veggie: great tips on labour, will try and remember some of them!

Mibbes: would second trying different holds for each side. DS def preferred one side to the other after a while.

Abby: I wold go spare stuck in the hospital all day with no food or drink . Hope they fit you in first thing tomorrow.

LadyT: v sensible to think about getting the weight down slowly. It may sound a lot but it's amazing how quickly it can come off as your hormones settle down.

Arti and others facing inductions: hope things kick off for you soon. And good luck to Orange!

I'm with WG in not wanting this baby out immediately, would be perfectly happy waiting a couple of weeks if I were still mobile! Baby is now v low and getting painful to walk any distance, which I find rather depressing. Also finding it difficult to navigate my impressive bulk around without bashing into things. But still happy to be pg for a little while longer, esp as I'm enjoying spending time with DS who is developing into a very funny child. Oh, and eating chocolate and lounging about has a lot to recommend it as well

Hi all - finally had a chance to catch up. Congratulations to all those with babies since I last posted - rosmerta, feb, kmp traceface, kayz, babblington hiccy and of course veggie. Hope I haven't missed anyone.

Its really great the effort everyone has gone to to post their birth stories - it a huge help to hear them. trace - I'm especially grateful to hear about your VBAC - I'm hoping for one too, but am trying to keep my expectations realistic.

Abby - so frustrating to hear about you being bumped today - hope you get on the list quickly tomorrow morning.

WG - your account of missing your mother almost had me in tears - sounds like she was a wonderful lady, but sounds also like your Dad's lady friend is doing her utmost.

So strange to hear of all these babies though. Today was finally the first day of my maternity leave, though not a moment too soon. Was lovely to be with my DD - she was slightly confused this am to have both me and her nanny around, but then was so sweet and cuddly. Every once in a while she would come up with a big smile and say "mummy is here". Feel a little sad for all the change that is coming to her, but its exciting too - I wouldn't be without my siblings for the world.

Haircut tomorrow - then I am at peace with the world and this baby can come when it likes!

Morning everyone - it's taken me days to catch up!!!!! So have been lurking but refusing to post until I got to the end!!!
Congrats on the new bubbas and veggie your birth story is sooooo inspiring to a hopeful homebirther!
Gawd, I'm knackered (but I am under no illusion that I am anywhere near the league of the new mums!!!) SPD is getting worse so night time is very very uncomfy. I have got 11 days to go now (or 13 depending on which due date I go with!) so obviously going for the 11!
Will try to keep up a bit better..wed and thurs are when DS goes to nursery so intending to spend a bit of time on the sofa!
Good luck today Abbey

Quick update from me. After an hour of strong contractions every 2-3 mins phoned hospital at 10pm and they asked me to come in for monitoring. However after a 40 minute car journey the contractions had slipped to a pathetic 7 mins, and never picked up during the monitoring so they obviously thought I was a total melingerer - more likely babyOrange took one look at the MW and got scared.

After much debate the MW finally agreed to at least 'have a look' and found that my cervix is still clamped tightly shut, despite the contractions and in her opinion this will continue for several days and will most likley just have to wait for my induction appt on Friday before active labour starts. To add insult to ingury she announced that after perfect positioning since 32 weeks, babyOrange has now rolled over and is back to back just to add to my enjoyment

So never made it past triage and got home at about 1am and managed 2.5 hours sleep before the contractions picked back up again to every 5 minutes and I had to get up and move about. Has been like that ever since. So not sure what state I'm going to be in by Friday? (DH is still fast asleep of course)Can they really leave me that long?

Seeing my local MW this afternoon so will see what she says, but not at all happy at the way things are going

oh orange that's so frustrating. The only comfort is that if you stay at home as long as possible, where you will be more relaxed, there's more chance of the contractions turning into established labour - so they won't get to do the induction. Here's hoping. The midwife sounds like a bolshy cow, btw (just my opinion). You might want to put a wet kipper in your handbag to slap her with when you DO go in.

trace sorry to hear about your tear. If you have any questions as it heals do let me know... I hope the mw can reassure you today about the odd bits and pieces. It will all feel very weird and painful an swollen for a while yet - but eventually it will heal. As effie says though, be prepared for the stitches to feel very tight as they heal. This is good sign all is sorting itself out. No one told me when I had mine and I got really worried.

mibbes you can blow gently on your baby's face or tickle their toes or slightly undress them to wake them up for feeds.

Off to hosp today - wish me luck!

Orange that sucks. Just try and relax and rest as much as you can as you will need your strength. Hot baths and paracetamol (I know, I know, you want alot more).

Good luck at the hospital Verso.

I am off for another appointment at the hospital and my third sweep. I am pretty resigned to being induced on Saturday unless this sweep does something pretty dramatic. Wish me luck!

kayz I knew there was another post I wanted to reply to. Settling in moses basket - I find DD2 will only go down if she's fed, winded and clean nappy. Co-ordinating these things shouldn't be difficult but sometimes is. During the night she's not too hard to settle (famous last words) but 7pm-11pm she just won't... she feeds she gets wind she poos etc etc she gets overtired. Tried putting ir on slight slant but then you always have to put head at same end, which makes manoeuvering (sp?) v difficult.

One tip - feed wirh blanket so baby and blanket go down together - nice and warm rather than cold shock...

Also keep hands briefly and reassuringly on the baby once they reach the mattress.

Also try (sacrilege) putting on side slightly - with rolled-up blankets to prevent rolling onto front. I never did this with DD1 and she HATED sleeping on her back. We only started getting some sleep (ie one hour at a time rather than 35 minutes) when she could roll over (about four months in). I was vigilant about "back to sleep". This time though a midwife in hospital actually put DD2 slightly on her side... and sometimes if she won't settle on her back I try it and it works. (You will all think I'm terrible now!!)

(sorree for gramer and spelin - babie onn nee!!)

Orange: as Veggie says, home prob the best place for getting labour going, esp if that's the brand of mws they have at the hospital! Friday still a ways off . Remember to rest and eat. You could also try some time on your hands and knees to encourage that pesky baby to turn (I also found that position helpful in early labour as it took pressure off my back). Or lean on a birthing ball if you have one.

Arti: maybe 3rd time lucky on the sweep?

TIH: am also enjoying ML, a week in. DS is home tomorrow so less time for slacking about, bt am thinking of taking him to soft play so I can sit down while he runs about.

Oli: sorry the SPD is getting worse, am also grumpy about aches and pains. DH is complaining I'm too restless at night as I try to get comfortable.

No sign of nesting here, though I did repack my hospital bag (and removed some of the chocolate ) and had a quick tidy up so the flat looks reasonable - same principle of decent knickers in case you get run over I suppose!

oh and Kayz if you were thinking of a sling there's a spesh offer on here:

www.bigmamaslings.co.uk/zen-cart/calin-bleu-simple-baby-sling-p-656.html

I got my last sling from them and thy offer a good service.

I remember DS being v difficult to settle in his crib for the first few weeks, we perservered and he got there eventually. Then he grew out of it and we went through it all again with the cot!

kayz i agree with verso on the side sleeping thing...have discovered that Phoebe is much happier on her side so I wedge her a bit with blankets, but obviously so she can't roll over. We always swaddled dd1 but the mw in hospital told us we are not supposed to swaddle these days as they can't wriggle out to cool themselves down so could overheat...cot death etc.

Ouch Trace hope you get some relief soon and the MW can put your mind at rest.

So frustrating for Abby hope all goes well today.

Me me me post sorry especially as everyone else's woes seem so much worse than mine. I have having a terrible time sleeping. I keep getting trapped wind normally starts mid afternoon or evening and I just cannot get rid of it. Walking, peppermint tea, mints, gum, rubbing my back and side etc etc. I am making sure I do not eat fruit on a full stomach and such but nothing seems to help. Also getting the lurgy so generally feeling rather sorry for myself. Boo hoo!