Due Dec 08 -- Getting Ready for final push (in every sense!)

[Beans33]

Here's a new thread for us all lovely Dec Mums!

Helloo!!

I know it's a long time since I last posted but these threads move so quickly I haven't been able to keep up .

I've been successful in my bid to go into the low risk birth unit (I'm classed as high risk due to a previous c-section and my BMI ). I had a meeting with the lead midwife and she agreed that it wouldn't be a problem as I had a HBAC last time. The stupid thing is that the MLU is only across the corridor from the main delivery suite and their rooms are actually closer to theatre than some of the rooms on the main unit! I've also managed to change consultant,still debating whether to write a snotty letter about the attitude of the previous one.

My children have all just got over chicken-pox. One twin got it then almost exactly 2 weeks later the other 3 came out in spots together,just in time for half-term! What I find strange is that the twins didn't get it together as they are both in the same class and are in contact with the same people.

I've been having a lot of twinges,far more than I ever remember with the others. That combined with the cracking my pelvis makes when I get out of bed,is making me very impatient to give birth . Plus I don't 'do' small babies so earlier will definitely be preferable .

I'll try to post a bit more now especially as I seem to be awake at stupid times most nights.

Hi Indith . Sorry - been browsing some other threads as I thought there was no way anyone would be awake on here at this time in the morning!

and to snorris too

I'm allowed to be up - it's day time here

I'm up early again but this time for work - but oh dear verso I have to run, but I hope you have a better day.... - you still not coming to the meet up?

Thanks fo the support girls..we just had a stilted-ish hug before he went to work. I still feel cross though.
Boo to all the night time waking...I actually had quite a good night for a change. Can see that the night feeds are going to mean lots of night postings!
I also found a tens more distracting than pain relieving but still might hire one so that I have something to fiddle with.
Verso I think that you are entitled to a night nanny. DS woke loads and due to BF I bore the brunt of it for a very very long time. It is exhausting and I think a night nanny might just preserve your sanity!
Snorris..you sound fit to pop!! Hope it happens soon.

I have been following the live homebirth story on one of these threads..so exciting...hope some of you manage to post in labour ...it's addictive mn-ing!

Morning,

Sorry for the rows Oli and Verso I hope everything is sorted out soon.

Snorris I'll keep my fingers crossed you have Baby Snorris soon.

I bought a Tens machine for labour with DS and it was AMAZING!!! It was so good it really got rid of the pain and also the distraction was great. The only downside is having to take it off when you are about to give birth. There is a very small chance of being electricuted!! It is the most important thing in my bag.

I had awful bad back pains last night and didn't sleep very well. I'm going shopping today, I'm hoping it won't kill me. I can only really manage 2 hours of walking around until I feel like going home. DH was a bit worried that I shouldn't be walking too much now but I reassured him that I'm within walking distence of the hospital.

kmp I can't come to the meet-up . I really wish I could - especially since I was one of the first to suggest Clapham originally! But the school date is fixed, so I can't do anything about that.

Sorry for the rant last night. Just getting v stressed re newborn insomnia (could you tell?!). I've already had a reply to an email from another agency though so will be following up and I hope interviewing a nanny soon! Things always look much better in the morning, don't they?!

oli hope things are less stilted this evening when your DH gets back from work. I hate leaving a row in the air as it were.

Wasn't me that needed the lullabye last night it was ds

Poor boy is not well. Eventually persuaded him to sleep around 3am and have spent most of the time since listening to him coughing and thinking he is going to wake up with every coughing fit. Don't somehow think he is going to creche today so I reckon an outing to buy chocolate and other such rubbish will be needed!

Sorry about all the cross words, hormones have a lot to answer for!

No experience of tens but my periods were a lot better for a while after having ds, then they got steadily worse again so I got pg and solved that problem I'm a pretty high contender for having endometriosis though so I wouldn't listen to me.

Verso hope you manage to get a night nanny sorted, must be tough not having the back up. Not sure what this time will be like for us as dh will be working away a lot, last time he was still a student so able to get up at 6am with ds and leave me to sleep for 2 hours!

snorris good news on the MLU And at least all the kids have now had cp.....best get them all done and dusted

Take That?

morning all!
Feeling brighter today so no more teary moans for the moment from me!
WG - I barely had periods before dd1 but then after her they came with a vengeance - really heavy and painful - so perhaps it's just one of those individual unpredictable things?
verso - your situation sounds so tough...sometimes it's the hope of a rest that gets us through, so when there's no promise of that rest it becomes impossible. No-one will think you're lazy for getting some support - a lot of us have it from other means - there's no difference (apart from the cost element for you sadly). I have some sympathy - my dh has rheumatoid arthritis so one day seems fine and is 'normal' and another day he can't even lift a mug of tea because his wrist is so swollen. It means that you can't exactly rely on the practical help, although I know that is a million miles from what you have to deal with with MS. I sometimes find myself wondering if he exaggerates symptoms when he fancies a cop out, and my sympathy runs out because I'm SO TIRED AND SICK OF IT!!!! but then my guilt kicks in and you can't win! Anyway - am thinking of you and please don't beat yourself up. Really hope you find someone you can trust and feel comfortable with.
My dd1 has her first ever school taster session today - just to add to the current excitement and change going on in her little life! It's just for an hour this afternoon and she's really excited. Her teacher is called Mrs Snowball and every time I mention it she bursts out laughing, saying "that's a really funny name" - I hope she doesn't do it to her face - or that Mrs Snowball has a sense of humour...otherwise we might be blacklisted before we even start!!!
Right - better be off - am helping a friend look after her twins this morning (yikes! - don't know how you twins-mums manage!)
catch you later xxx

Too many people awake in the middle of the night last night - and I'd have joined you if I hadn't left my laptop at work. Going to be v self centred and moan about me for a bit, but I've got a stinking cold that appeared in about an hour last night and I didn't dare take any medication in case it was bad for babyZJ, so took an enormous glass of sloe gin to bed with me instead. It knocked me out til midnight, but I haven't slept since then so I'm now snotty and grumpy. And at work, since I've got a meeting scheduled this morning that I couldn't change at short notice. Will go home at lunchtime though, I promise. Enough about me, I'm boring and horrible when not feeling good.

verso so sorry to read about what you want through DD, it sounds so so hard for you. And from what you've said previously about how much you apply yourself at work too, you sound a very driven person to achieve all that. However, sometimes people with so much drive can be their own worst enemy, so I do hope the night nurse works out for you (sounds more promising already this morning).

and arti I hope you are getting some rest today and someone else in your team is getting their arse into gear today.

Have a good day all xx

Paracetamol zj, timed through the day so you can still take a dose before bed and have a dose left to take if you wake during the night. A chest rub, lemon and ginger infusions with lots of honey in and lavender essential oil to just dab on your temples if you start getting headachey between paracetamol doses.

Ds still asleep. Have no desire to do washing up etc on the scant sleep I've had. Suppose I should make the house look passable since the landlady will probably be coming round with the plumber. Have realised I only have about 1 does of medised left from the bottle I've been carefully preserving since they changed the rules about under 2s!

morning all,

Sympathies to those with insomnia, colds & rows with dh's. Dh & I haven't had any rows as such but he does tend to keep his distance when I'm getting emotional & hormonal.

verso am glad you're hopefully getting a nanny sorted soon, sounds like you and dh would be better with some sort of help.

trace glad you're feeling a little better today.

beans am happy I'm not the only one who can't resist Murder She Wrote! I seem to have a knack for finding all the rubbish programmes & films!

Ds is in nursery this morning, & I've gone back to bed . I am going to do some studying though so best get off MN and do some!!

LT so sorry to hear you failed on a wee error - fingers crossed for next time.

trace you poor thing, hope you are feeling more reassured. I have had similar worries about baby's movement - have felt a few movements that seem far too quick and panicked that baby was fitting - have managed to calm down about it now as it hasn't happened for a few days - it is a worrtying time. Veggie your comments about shivers and startle reflex have reassured me further

hatty sorry to hear about chicken pox, hope your other DD gets it soon.

poisondwarf last day tomorrow and you join those of us on ML - hurray ! Oh and I've been having urine tests at every AN appt.

Veggie sorry but LOL at you rehydrating to keep up with all the escaping fluid !

arti, sounds like you really need {{big hugs}} , you are a real trooper going into work when you should really be resting.

Flumpy next week - eeekk ! It is so exciting that we are going to start having birth announcements soon... oooh who will be first ?....

Kimberley the room looks great and you look fab too

OMG so many of you up at ungodly hours ! welcome back snorris Verso good luck with nanny interview - really hope you can get some help sorted out, I have no idea how you cope - I can only admire from afar.

Well day 1 of mat leave was spent at a spa with my mum, had a lovely 1.5 hour mum-to-be massage . Today I am meeting my NCT ladies for lunch then we are off to the NCT 'bumps and babies' class. This evening going to see the labour ward so busy busy so far. Beans am also a bit worried that am going to be sooo bored as soon as I don't have a full day planned... Need to get some 'to do' lists to focus me on all the nesting tasks I have to do...

Oh and could I join the shameful ranks of the 'nutritionally challenged'... I started off 8 months ago all super-healthy and have gradually got worse, recently I have been eating way too much Ben and jerry's, chocolate and haribo . I must make ML a turning point and feed the wee one some goodness before s/h arrives

WG I found the tens machine pretty useless in labour, and my period pains definitely got worse after DS, for about a year, then got much better, so I guess it depends on the individual.
Verso I have so much admiration for you, you are so together despite everything. I hope you get the help you need with this baby, and that it is a little angel that sleeps through the night from day 3 etc.
Should have said this before, but if anyone is looking for a maternity nurse I know of a very good one. She is an old friend of the family who helped look after my sister's three in Zimbabwe, but has now moved to the UK. She came to me for a week when I had DS and was a Godsend. She did all the night feeds so that I could catch up on sleep, helped get us into a routine and generally just gave me confidence with things like bathing/ breastfeeding etc.
Being African she is incredibly hard working, and when she wasn't looking after DS she was doing ironing, washing up etc, I could hardly stop her. So if anyone is interested, let me know and I'll give you contact details.
Hope everyone has a good day...

Morning All

Verso and Oli - sorry to hear about the rows. I think these last tense weeks are very hard on relationships and men have no idea how uncomfortable and tired we feel now. Also although their lives are going to change they are facing nothing compared to us, for most men they will continue with work and the occassional night out etc etc whereas for most of us every waking minute will be different.

Verso - I do hope you get a night nanny. You have to have some time to recuperate and if your family can't help then trawl every agency until you find someone you trust. Where do you live? I have the name of a great night nanny who is based in Scotalnd but travels everywhere and just spent two weeks with my neighbour. However I think she likes to do two week chunks rather than one night every week (on second thoughts maybe she is a post-natal doula who lives in and does nights).

Indith and Snorris - sorry to see you both up so late. I hope you can get through today!

Kayz - I am you can walk around shops for two hours. Enjoy! I can't walk for more than about 10 minutes because of the BHs which walking sets off.

Kimberley - your bymp is sooooo neat. I will get DH to take a photo of my bump tonight. I could fit your whole body inside me!

Well I am back at my desk but I am at the end of my tether. Something has snapped for me emotionally and I am not coping.

After I posted yesterday I left work an hour early without telling anyone because I could not stop crying. Luckily nobody saw, but I never cry, and I have never stormed out of work, so I was a bit alarmed. This morning I still feel like pants. I am about to go and see my Head of Department to tell him I will try and make it until Friday but not beyond. However, I am scared that I will cry when i try to explain this .

I just feel so down, I am not even really looking forward to lying around at home as I am so uncomfortable. I hate to say that I am not 100% looking forward to the baby coming either. I know I will love her and feel differently when I see her, but right now the physical effort of labour honestly feels like it might kill me and the idea of sleepless nights and constant feeding is terrifying. God, I am crying again. I think I need sectioning . I am off to write a report, maybe that will distract me.

Oh Arti sweetheart, don't worry about being upset in front of your boss - maybe then he'll realise just how extra hard you've been having to work because of your flaky team members. Labour won't kill you, it's what your body's made for - it just feels scary when you're already tired and down. You'll be fine, I promise!

It is all becoming very imminent isn't it? So many of us are feeling the pressure these final few weeks, whether it's physically or emotionally (or both!).

Big hugs to everyone who's been having rows, or family issues, or not getting enough sleep, or problems with kids. Good old MN as an outlet for all this.

Arti, Arti, it's just (I say 'just', but you know what I mean) a really nasty bad patch. You are totally knackered and uncomfortable and under a strain and poorly, and in DESPERATE need of a rest. When you go and see your Head of Dept emphasize your PHYSICAL incapacitation, because if it's a man they will find this easier to understand. Big breath, keep it simple and short and this may enable you to get through the explanation without crying. BUt you really, really need to finish on Friday for the sake of your health. If you are worrying about tying up loose ends, can you do stuff at home? Would that be a compromise?

You can do this, you can do ALL of this. You have just temporarily and quite unsurprisingly lost your mojo for a bit. It will come back, and you will cope. Good luck. Gloves up!

Oh Arti - chin up. You'll be ok and you WILL get through this. If you cry in front of your boss, don't worry - he won't mind - you are just struggling so much at the moment and you need support. I really hope you're ok.

Big love to you. I'm sorry if my posts are a bit short at moment - internet keeps cutting out, so have to cut messages short in case I get cut off.

katie and pd - thank you for your advice re my friend - I am going to meet her today, but will avoid the topics. I appreciate all help enormously.

xxxx

arti I second what ladyt, benas & jump have said. Right now any kind of relaxation, never mind labour, seems impossible but that's just because you are so exhausted. Once you're at home on the sofa & you've had some proper sleep, it will all look better. [hugs]

beans good luck with your friend today

WG - did you sort out a massage? (Arti, when you are off get yourself down to Cowshed in Notting Hill, my dear, and have nice things done to you) and Mibbes - how was yours? I find pregnancy massages annoyingly gentle but I suppose they have to watch it in these litigious times!

Tens - I bought one for my DH when he was sick. It did ameliorate the pain but I found it hard to get the use and positioning of it right. Re: period pains - I think you can't beat Feminax or Nurofen Plus, as well as a hot water bottle or heat pad!

Verso - hope you manage to find a reliable night nurse. Sounds like a necessity rather than a luxury.

Welcome back SNorris!

Indith - hope your DS perks up, and Traceface, glad you are feeling better. I had a good night's sleep for the first time in a week, hurrah.

ZJ - envious of the sloe gin, not so envious of the cold! Lots of fluids to chase it away, please.

arti agree with what all the others say. This is definitely a low point and even though stuff will still be hard after you have finished, you will feel better when you are on ML. And I think LadyT's suggestion of emphasising the physical side of the problems you are having is a great one, as there is no arguing with that (and MEN understand it - if your boss is a man that is!), though I'm sure your boss should be understanding if you put forward the emotional turmoil you are going through too!

verso good luck in finding a maternity nurse, it sounds like a great idea to me, and I really hope that you have an easier time sleep-wise with this one as well. Hopefully the birth will be less of trauma this time as well.

You all made me laugh with your Thomas comments. Veggie, DH is well aware that he will get to go on steam engines and is very excited about it. Every time we go to North Wales he complains that I just want to go mountain biking and won't go on the steam trains with him, and he knows where they all are (very geeky but quite sweet). I am aware of the existence of In the Night Garden even though I am a first-timer, i have to admit it all seems a bit odd and trippy to me though...my work mate was showing me all the different characters on CBeebies online!

Arti you are not alone, although I am by no means under the pressures you are at the moment, but I do understand what you mean about slightly dreading the impending. I am going through a stage where I'm wondering whether I really want another baby and definitely not feeling excited like I should be. I find it hard enough coping with one DC and part time work, let alone adding to that. I feel very guilty for feeling like this, especially after two miscarriages and being so desperate to conceive, so just hope that this is a passing phase. Keep your chin up and be straight with your boss, you need some time for you now.

right i am typing whilst having my minutes silence, although DS has decided to accompany the minutes silence with his ELC keyboard.

I have had so much trouble catching up this morning and can't remember all of what was said, every time i get caught up there are more posts to read. Also my mum rang so that put me back to.

Verso-from getting to know you on this thread you are hardly one to run away from something, but getting yourself a good nights sleep is worthwhile. DH's boss' wife is a nanny and did a night for us once when we were having a big night out. they have recently maried and she isnt doing any longterm live in work, so she may be up for the type of thing you are looking for. I think they live over in west london somewhere. i can check if she is up for some work if you want. She is quite nice mid 30's.

Arti- cry or no cry well done for taking the bull by the horns and organising to get yourself out of there.

And for those who are worried about having nothing to do while your on ML, enjoy that feeling, because soon it will be gone, and most of all enjoy doing somethings by yourself, like having a coffee in a busy coffee sop that you can't get a pram into, or just reading. Seriously you will miss it when it's gone, don't get me wrong it is replaced by something equally good but still you will miss it.

I can't remember who mentioned my brother in tights but when i was a teenager i used to go down and visit my brother in Melbourne because he went to the big national ballet school down there, and oh boy for a pubescent girl full of hormones it was amazing all the lovely muscular boys in their tights. Speaking of which i have very much hit my hormonal finding-all-very masculine-members-of-the-opposite-sex very attractive. Poor DH, he likes that i tell him how hot he is but i also tell him how hot i am finding a lot of other men.