Due Jue 2005, Thread 5

[LipstickMum]

Katz, thanks for your email. I have replied but also said I would post on here my suggestion for luch tomorrow. Basically all I suggested was that at lunch we give our doatios to someone, and they send off 1 cheque to Katz, makes it a bit simpler. I'm happy to send a cheque.

aha - thanks!

Yeah, unless you are given one or lent one, don't bother with moses basket, they outgrow them so quickly.

However ! We inherited a lovely rigid, bamboo moses basket that sits on a frame, so it is about hip height (dp used to sleep in it and his mum kept it for her first grandchildren!). We loved it, dd slept in it at the end of the bed until she outgrew it, which was about 12 weeks maybe..? I was gutted when she went into her own room in a cot but then I'm a bit sad

We went for a cot, not a cot bed. Mainly because we planned to have our children close together. So, dd will graduate to a bed and the next one will have the cot she was in.

Hmm, I suppose a bed-height one on a frame you can rock might be handy for the first few weeks next to my side of the bed, we couldn't fit a proper cot in our bedroom very easily...

Our bedroom is small too, will be smaller when the loft is converted, we need to use some space for the stairs.

Morning everyone!

Can't belive it is Monday AGAIN!! I was saying to dp, that I think that I am going to be the only mother with a newborn to have MORE rest when they arrive!! I'm sure I'll fit in more sleep and not having to travel about will definitely make me feel more rested!!

Lippy - Sorry to be personal but have you got maternity tights to wear with your dress? I need to get some but don't know what sort are best. Any suggestions?

Charley - We're not bothering with a moses basket either. In fact, baby is going to be in a cot in their own room right from the start, but we are lucky in that our bedroom door and baby's door are at right angles to each other so we can pretty much see straight into the bedroom if we leave both doors open. That way, hopefully we'll get the best of both - peace of mind, but they won't get dependant on sleeping with us.

Teabelly - Why did you think I was blonde??? LOL!! My mum is blonde with blue eyes, as you will have noticed, but I am the complete opposite!

I can't comment on the circumcision discussion here. We won't be doing it, if we have a boy, and I don't understand the motivation for other people so will keep my nose firmly out.

Talking of boys though.... isn't EVERYONE having a boy so far??? (Except we don't know what welshie is having.....) I'm pretty sure no-one has said they're having a girl... If I'm right, then perhaps we should run a book to see who'll be the first? My bet would be on Charleypops, having seen her amazing bump!

Actually, am quite jealous of everyone's bumps. Mine was practially non-existent in comparison to everyone else's on Saturday! Must be a compact baby! Mini-Me!

Anyway, must go get organised for my thrilling day. Can't wait to start ML!!! Need a rest! Have a good day everyone. x

Have to make this short as I'm trying to get out the door, and I'm late already. It was either mums net or breakfast -- PRIORITIES!

Charleypops - I like my moses basket. Will definitely use it. Best with a stand, and they are certainly much less than that bloody expensive pran you are buying. BUT, I would strongly recommend never EVER rocking the baby to sleep. If you do, you will spent the next couple of years of yourlife rocking on demand. I believe in leaving the baby to learn to get him/herself off to sleep. Dark room and a cot or moses basket.

I'll try to sign on again later, but I really must try and give up the mumsnet addiction whilst at work (I suspect however that this new moral high ground is not going to be a success).

Bubbaloo, we have the gina changing table (with shelves). And can't remember the name of the cot, but it's the one with three white balls in it (also from M&P).

OKAY, terribly late now... ttfn

just had a thought charlypop where abouts are you? i have a moses basket gathering dust in my loft. We are being leant this time a swinging crib by our friends and if baby doesn't like it like DD didin't then the baby will be in the cot from day one, luckily it fits in our bedroom.

bubbaloo- did you get the bath to go into the Gina? We didn't get it first time around, but I decided after about a month of leaning over into the bath that that was mistake. I want to get one this time, but I don't know what one fits. And, whilst the M&P website if very pretty, I find it useless in terms of finding what they are looking for. (I could teach them a thing or two about the usefulness of information management! i.e. information is useless if your customers can't find it.)

Morning all,
I'm thinking of borrowing a moses basket for the side of the bed for the 'surely it doesn't need feeding again stage' and then into dd's cot pretty sharpish - she was in there by 4 weeks. DD is going into a bed - she wants 'a pink one'.....
Uwila - you're absolutely right - there'll be no rocking in our house either.
Charley - we've been really happy with our cot - it's got brio trains at each end. We got it from Mothercare I think - the catalogue.
Lippy - can you describe the dress you got from Topshop? Is it the black one from the mat range?
Scraggy - thanks for starting the mat tights debate. I've found some opaque ones I had last time - I don't think I wore them much as I was mostly in trousers. This time I'm going for dresses like Lippy so will need to hunt out some good tights. Does anyone know if M&S still do them - mine seem to have come from there but that was 3 years ago.....
I now have my mat clothes all ready - just can't bring myself to start wearing them....still enjoying the fact that some people haven't noticed I'm pg - they just think I'm a porker....

Scraggy, I don't htink pregnant women can evr get too personal! There's something about being pregnant/having a baby that makes some women feel completely at ease with asking all sorts of normally incredibly rude questions!! I don't htink the kind of tights I wear is rude though. I was wearing maternity tights from M&S, last pregnancy ones that I'd hardly worn. They were too short and rolled down under my bump by the end of the day. They're good tights though, I just need to get some bigger ones!

Also, I just wanted to add something about baby sleeping in the same room as you. I'm afraid I can't quite remember the evidence or reasons to support this theory, but I think it is recommended that baby sleeps in the same room as parents in the early weeks. It might have something to do with the gases we expel whilst breathing helping to prevent SIDS. I'll try and look up the evidence, unless someone else on here agrees with me and can qualify my advice with valid reasons??

I also completely agree with Uwila; if you can help it, don't let baby get used to being rocked to sleep, only fall asleep onyour lap etc etc. even sleeping with a night light. You'll probably end up with problems trying to stop those habits

PS. Chaley imagined I was blonde with bright red lipstick... so quite far from reality

Welshie...not stereotyping as such, he he he...I lived with a little welshie in a house share for 5 years and she's 5 foot nothing...and her family are shorter (their family car was one of the old mini's and they had loads of room in it!!)...so I kind of had them in my head!!

Scraggy - blonde - don't know why I guess you just have an image in your head as people 'speak'...I had you down as a blondie too Lippy!! Also thought you were in Kent not Oxford...must be my silly preggie brain

Charley...agree with the others borrow a moses basket if poss as they're not really in them for very long...ds had outgrown his by 6 weeks!!! As Lippy says buy a cot if you're going to have them fairly close together...we bought a cot bed and now ds is going to be kicked out of his little man's bed as we need the 'cot' part back!

Circumcision...ummmm, didn't do it for ds and wouldn't for this one if it was a boy...no strong views either way just never considered it from a religious point of view as I'm C of E and didn't realise other countries did it as a maintream kind of thing...have to say I've personally never seen a circumcised willy, but if I ever go hunting for dh number two I'll make it my mission to find one...should experience everything at least once in life

New babes in the same room as you...isn't it something also to do with them being able to hear your breathing and so regulate their own breathing in accordance...??

Morning ladies.

I don't know if anyone else has been thinking on these lines since the awful events of last week. I'm thinking about phoning the midwives today to see if I can go in just to have the heartbeat checked quickly. I haven't felt any movement yet (although dh thinks he may have done last night) but at 18 weeks in my first pregnancy I'm not really that surprised. My scan is in 2 weeks and I'd just like some reassurance before then.

First of all am I completely mad? Second of all, is the midwife likely to tell me I'm completely mad and to stop wasting their time? I could try and book an appointment at the local surgery for tomorrow (midwife clinic on a Tuesday) but it's my birthday and I don't have the best of birthday karma (well, my house burnt down on my birthday two years ago, but that's another story).

Anyway, advice appreciated. I've been pretty rational about most things up til now but it's just preying on my mind and I find it hard to concentrate on anything else

Welshie, Top Shop had some good wrap around dresses in 3 different colours, but they tied up above the bump, so had an empire line effect and made me look terrible ! So, I bought the only other dress they had which was quite patterned, black, green, purple and pink. Needless to say I feel like an old hippy in it
As for tights, mine are M&S from 2 years ago, I hope they still do them, they are the best.

I found some nice black dresses too on businessbump, Mothercare and one of the catalogues (JMB or BM) and I think Next???

Morning all!!! Glad your meet-up went well! I on the other hand attended 3 kids birthday parties on Saturday with my 2!!!! I never want to see another party bag!
Re: Moses baskets .. i have inherited one that used to be mine. I find them useful for downstairs daytime sleeps - they dont take up much room either. I usually use them beside the bed for a couple of weeks... then i put the moses basket into the cot for a few nights before i transfer baby into the cot at about 4-6 weeks. I usually end up sleeping in a bed in babys room for the first few months so that everyone else isnt disturbed too much. I had my 2 DS's sleeping in bed with me for half of the night too, just so i could get more sleep.
Re: baby baths ... i got a great bath seat (which can be used from newborn) from the Blooming Marvelous catelogue - £14.99 i think. It means that baby can bath with her sibling from day one and you are also hands free. The only downside is that you cannot have a very deep bath.
Agree with Uwilla about rocking. I always gave loads of cuddles etc before hand but as soon as baby is in the cot let them settle themselves. I learnt the hard way with DS1 that it saves years of bad sleep habits.

Tribpot if it's worrying you that much phone the mw or go to the surgery...the worst they can say is you're being silly...and if you're at all like me I asked lots of silly questions when I was expecting ds and am sure to do so again now! You're right that a first pg will take longer to feel the first movemnets...with ds I don't think I felt him properly until I was about 22 weeks. Phone - you have nothing to loose and at least it will help put your mind at rest

Morning Trib, last weeks events did throw me into a bit of baby monitoring paranoia too. I'm 18 weeks and have been feeling the little buterflies in the tummy feeling (2nd child though). I completely understand where you are coming from with needing re-assurance. Tbh, after last week and us all trying desperately to re-assure Sweetheart that everything would be fine, but that she should take action and then it turned out the way it did, I don't quite know what to say Anyone else? If you think your midwife would be sympathetic and could fit you in, why not ask, they can only say no, or at least chat with you about what you are feeling.

I'm going to look up some info on babies in the same room as parents.

Tribpot - totally agree with how you are feeling!!!! I have just been thinking about phoning the midwife this morning to see if i can have a heartbeat detection before my 20 week scan. I am eighteen weeks on wednesday and it is my 3rd pregnancy. I have been feeling movements for a couple of weeks now but not consistently enough to stop me worrying. I think it is a shame that there isnt an 18 week appointment. A month is a long time to wait between 16 weeks and 20 weeks IMO - especially when you have no regular movements for reassurance. When i was pg with DS2 i didnt feel movement until well after my scan at 20 weeks.

Oh, this talk about bas sleeping habits makes me want to cry! I thought I had all figured out with my DD, but lately it has been such a nightmare! Sorry for the rant, but I am at wits end! She is waking up 3 times during the night, and waking up at 6AM!
I did backup from the controlled crying, and try to give her some more support, but she is still so difficult!
Anyone else having trouble with their toddlers? Maybe it is me, and my hormones that is making me less patient!

At any rate, I am very envious of you having DS and DDs moved to a bed! How are you doing it? How old are your kids? Everytime I mentioned a bed to DD she cries and says she wants to stay in her cot!

Oh, tribpot, I understand how are you feeling. I think after all the events probably the only thing that will reassure you is to go in and listen to the heartbeat. My MW never seem to be bothered when I amke random appointments to ask any question. I'm sure yours would be happy to put your mind at ease too.
However I have to say that I didn't feel anything with DD until past 20 weeks. And this little guy finally gave me and his dad a big kick saturday, but that was it, and I am 21 weeks!

Morning everyone

Glad the meetup went so well, sounds like so much fun. I'd love to come on the next one - was hoping I might make the Sheffield one (PIL are in Doncaster so we're up that way a fair bit) but can't do that weekend unfortunately.

I'm another one in total paranoia re movements - I'm 20 weeks this week and definitely feeling them, but they're still quite little and easy to miss. I didn't really feel movement with ds until after my 20 week scan, which isn't unusual with a first pregnancy I don't think. The midwife also told me last time that at this stage, you only feel it if the baby touches the front of your uterus, because it's your stomach muscles feeling it not the uterus wall, so if baby is kicking merry hell out of the back of you, you won't necessarily feel it. Having said that, my midwife has been very adamant that if I'm worried at all at any time for any reason to go to the clinic and they'll have a listen. They'd rather take 5 minutes to do that than have you worry, I'm sure.

Moses baskets - we used one for about 3 months with ds, on the floor by the bed at first and then in his cot to get him used to it after that. They are great for making them portable around the house too! We had one instead of a crib/cradle thing, if we'd had one of those it would have been pointless to have both. And we didn't bother with the stand.

Tribot - if you're anxious you should definitley phone the midwife and ask if you can come in, or try your gp - they listened to mine at 13 weeks and that was very reassuring. When I'm near any sort of medical practitioner I always ask to hear the heartbeat! I've found that most will humour me. You go for it.
Lua we had a bit of this with dd when she was around 2 - I just got very firm and very boring and I think she was getting so little out of me visiting her bedroom that she gave up.
Lippy - I'm with you on the hippy front - I've got a vaguely psychedelic number from Topshop too.

Thanks to all - I phoned the midwife and she said "sure, pop in this morning and we'll reassure you" so hurrah for that. Just off now, so will report back later on. I'm not too worried about not having felt movement, but of course if I had I would at least have that reassurance. Anyway, mw didn't sound like she thought I was demented, so that is good.

Take care all.

boy you guys are chattyb this morning!!

I need to ring my midwife, although i've had my 20 week scan i've not had my 20 week appointment!! is the one they steal blood at?

Lua is she in a cot bed or a cot?? if it's a cot bed you could take the sides off and see how she gets on...get her to help you make it into a 'grown up' bed. Otherwise if you have a single bed for her to use get her to help choose the bedding and use a bed guard for a while - it gives them an added sense of security (abit like her cot) and may help her settle easier. Apart from that as Welshie says just stick to a routine and don't give in...having tried the controlled cyring you know it's hard for a while but once they realise all the shouting and screaming or getting up again isn't going to make one iota of difference they tend to fall in with your rountines. HTH