Due April 2008 - Spring Lambs and April Fools II

[Carey87]

New thread!!!

Scorpio, I'm very sorry for your loss.

Oh Scorpio sweetheart. I don't know what to say.
Words mean nothing at times like this
{{{{{hug}}}}}}

Dad said it didn't hurt her, she was asleep and on morphine. hope thats true.

I won't be able to go to a funeral either - just can't risk it. If you look on a mao, i live in Penzance and she lives in Newport - too far. for 37+ weeks, history of labours at 39 weeks exactly.

I wasn't able to go to my Dad's funeral Scorpio. It was xmas eve in Glasgow, I was in Northampton with a 1yr old and unable to spend xmas away from her.

It still hurts now sometimes, but I think a funeral is for the living, it's not as if she means any less to you because you have to think of your safety etc.

xxxxxxxx

just don't want her to think that im not there because i dont want to be. i know that sounds weird. feel weird.

It sounds totally normal to me, not weird at all.

I kind of persuaded myself dad would prefer me to be with ella for xmas morning than in a different country, and still felt bad about it but now I'm more at ease, I know he would've thought I was mental putting his body before my living child, a persons soul is always alive, your memories and love are what keeps them here, not a grave.

You can always go to her grave another time, or maybe go to a church when everyone else is at the funeral and light a candle or something?

i know if Nan was here she would tell me to stay at home and rest, don't worry about her etc etc. I am not going to go, even though likelihood of me going into labour next week is not high, but you never know do you?

DH be here soon. Think we can have takeaway tonight.

oh scorpio, i'm so sorry to hear about your nan. thinking of you.

What made me feel closer to Dad afetr he was gone was naming Bobby after him, you said you were thinking of giving Millie a second middle name, maybe a variation of your nans?

i don't know, VS, don't want to upset Mum. Name is same initial as Millie's.

Oh Scorpio I am sorry .

When Nan died, it was literally a few days before DS2's baptism and I had an extremely strong awareness of her actually apologising for missing it. I'm certain that your Nan will know about why you can't make it, and that she will know when the baby comes too. We all have our own beliefs about what happens after death, but I do firmly believe that poeples spirits do hang around until the inportant things are resolved.

Very sorry, scorpio. She wouldn't have minded your missing the funeral. As someone else said, you can make a special trip to the grave (or wherever the ashes are scattered) later, and/or pop into a local church at the same time as the funeral and give her your own personal send-off.

Even though MIL works full-time she's said to give her a call -- it should just about be workable as DS could be in nursery in the day so she'd just need to start late/finish early. The only day she definitely can't do is April 8 [thinks: hmm, I suspect I know which day DD will decide to turn up]. We should be able to make it work.

My Mum can't manage tonight or next saturday- mind you last time she booked a holiday for 41 weeks certain that baby would be here. Three hours after they set off baby arrived..... fortunately 1 sister didn't go with them, but she was 6 months pg herself so felt awful having to ask 9this time that sister is a no no due to tiny house and tiny baby plus toddler herself).

Scorpio {{{HUGS}}} So very sorry about your Nan!
The funeral really isn't the important thing, what's important is the years that you had with your Nan and the memories you have of her.

Possible explanation to these babies coming and our bodies faking it so much this weekend?

Sorry to hear about your Nan Scorpio - lots of hugs for you.

Sorry to hear about your Mum as well PAL - hope she has a speedy recovery.

Scorpio: I'm so sorry about your Nan. Very tough time for you and very hard that you can't go to the funeral but the others are right, she wouldn't want you to risk anything. It's just sad that you can't be with your family and say goodbye to her with them. My Gran died last June and although she was very old and senile it was important to say goodbye and I'm sure you can find your own way of doing that where you live

SuzeM: I can imagine how you are missing your Mum. My Dad died suddenly 2 and a half years ago, it's quite hard at times like this. He loved kids. It must be extra hard to be without your Mum as I'm sure you would have loved to talk to her loads about your pregnancy. You're right not to talk to anyone who's annoying you though! My SIL (mother to my niece and nephew who I adore) however is really nice and has really taken an interest in my pregnancy. I don't have any sisters and neither does she so it is nice. I think I will ask her to be godmother.

Scorpio: Big hugs, your nan will be able to hear you wherever you are so just talk to her in your head from where you live.

SuzeM: Sorry you are missing your mum. My mum is still here, but she is suffering from severe manic depression and cant cope with seeing me. I havent seen her for months even though she only lives down the road. I really miss having a mum to go baby shopping with and tell me what I need to buy and what I dont need. All my friends keep saying I am really irritable and have changed which upsets me as mostly im upset because my mum isnt here and its hard to cope with sometimes. I've started ignoring the phone too as im sick of people saying that im just panicking about the birth and "not to worry" argh!!!

VS - knitters waters went first!!

Oh Scorpio I am so sorry maybe you could do something for her at home on the day of her funeral like plant a rose or something she will be with you where ever you are x

Well i go away for a week and theres a whole new thread.

Scorpio, v sorry to hear about your nan and that you wont be there in person to say goodbye, maybe you could do something/go somewhere special nearer to home instead at the time of the funeral. Im glad for your nan that it seemed fairly quick and that she wasnt in too much discomfort.

Congratulations knitter on the safe arrival of George.

VS just mentioned to DH re the moon thing expecting hime to say pah what a load of crap, he simply said yeah thats possible the tides work on gravitational pulls from the moon Could be a busy weekend.

Hello to everyone else and hope your all doing ok.

We survived the cold and winds in wales but came home knackered from reduced sleep - the joys of caravaning in near winter, moral of the story is dont go to north west wales when easter is so early. The outlaws wernt too bad over the week either, although they wanted to do everything together so was glas of having the 2 vans to get some space last thing and first thing.

His parents have now said they arnt coming up till mid April, means he can have his leaving do at work and gets off the hook on entertaining them again as I will ob be home when they come - buggered if Im making the teas though done enough of that this last week.

DH has just got a new toy - petrol lawnmower - and despite the artic winds and recent hail storm he is determined to use it. My moneys on him coming in after the front garden is done.

Scorpio, echoing the others, you are right not to go to your grandmother's funeral .... she knows you are looking after her great-grandaughter.

Thanks Mollie and Jennie. Jennie, that is a tough situation for you.

My dh was telling me I should be happy about the baby (and I am of course) and not be getting sad, it's when I hear of my aunts flying over to the US and Oz to be with their daughters that I feel a bit down. Also, I am a narky cow sometimes!

I've asked my youngest brother to be godfather and he was thrilled, I think I'll ask my friend to be godmother.

Ha, yh Denny, DP thought I was talking bollocks until I read him an article in the Guardian that said people are more likely to commit violent crimes at a full moon (bradford(?) police was the source) and that you are TWICE as likely to go to A&E after an animal bite at the full moon etc, there was quite a lot on it tbh.

Scorpio, I thought that about ehr waters, and on the childbirth topic there is a 'am I arent I in labour' thread, I think three people have had their babies this weekend, that's not including knitter, and then all of us with our niggles and twinges.

Does make sense though as humans are 80% water and the moon has such a huge affect on tides why not on us too?

I only started looking cos he has his 'assessment centre blues' convinced he has failed for not wearing a suit....telling me he 'feels bad'

Jennie: So sorry to hear about your Mum's condition. My Dad also suffered from manic depression for a while (he was the most outgoing & lively person you can imagine before it). He had been doing really well the months before he died which made it all the harder I suppose (he died of heart failure so nothing to do with depression). However, it does show that people get better from it so I hope your Mum does soon. It's different for everyone and my Dad still saw us ublike your Mum but the person he probably most liked seeing was my niece. Maybe when your LO is born your Mum will feel ready to see you. Babies have a very healing effect on people I think.

Denny: Do your in-laws really expect you to serve them tea just after you've had a baby?