Pregnancy after MMC

[sadtoday21]

Hi everyone! I moved our thread over here so we can all keep in touch as we continue on this journey.

Many congratulations again to @Amanda81 on the birth of your beautiful baby girl Holly! Our first baby on the thread. Also tagging the regulars @Catconfusion @Kiki061190 @bananamonkey. Newcomers welcome as well!

Oh my @bananamonkey! That is very helpful - thank you for taking the time to note all of this down xx

Obviously everyone and every baby is different but just a few things that helped me, hopefully some of it can be useful. Was also trying to remember for myself, it’s amazing how quickly things change and how you forget!

@Kiki061190 I have a favourite name but not really discussed it with DH yet, I sent him my spreadsheet but haven’t had any feedback yet 😂

Oh @bananamonkey a spreadsheet! 😂😂 I’m guessing you have more than one option! When is your next midwife app? I have one Jan 21st and they said they’ll do bloods then to test for anemia

@kiki061190 he’s had a name since about 16 weeks. We use it when we speak to him. It’s top secret until birth. Quite an unusual one but not too wacky! Xx

@Catconfusion We’re still calling her baby girl even though we’ve picked her name mainly so none of us slip up around family. We’ve also decided to keep it from everyone until she’s born. Just 2 weeks left until the final trimester!

Yes @Kiki061190 I have lots of spreadsheets 😂 I just adapted my list from last time so have a few options, I have a favourite though. We just call her jalapeño for now. DD has suggested Rosie, Roddy and Timmy 🤷🏻‍♀️

Next MW appointment isn't till 29th Jan as I skip one and go straight from 16 to 28 weeks, have my glucose tolerance the week before though.

@Kiki061190 that sounds wise. We’re keeping the name secret too. It’s a week on Monday for me hitting the third trimester. My growth scans start a week on Friday. We’re looking forward to seeing what he’s up to in there. Lots of very strong kicking at present. Xx

Arh bless your DD @bananamonkey it’s lovely she has suggestions. Can I ask what factors led to the GD test for you? I really wanted it done but my midwife has said my age and pcos are not risk factors. I’ve also been suffering with low blood pressure and blood sugar but she still wouldn’t refer me. I’m going to speak to the consultant about it next week. Xx

@Catconfusion because my Dad has Type I, although he only developed it last year. I had it done last time because my bump was measuring big (which seems very unscientific!), I didn’t have it, I just have a long torso and DD was just under 7lbs at 39+4 so wasn’t huge but she was a long baby.

That makes sense @bananamonkey if your Dad has it. They do seem quite inaccurate with the bump measuring. I’ve not had mine done yet but it is very big. The midwife said it looked normal. I will see what my consultant says. There seems to be plenty of evidence that older mums are more at risk. I guess the nhs would be overrun with ladies needing testing if everyone had it looked at x

@bananamonkey @Catconfusion I’ve had my bump measured since 16 weeks. I’m up in scotland so not sure if it’s standard here but has measured bang on at all appointments. Looking forward to next Saturday to see baby girl again 😍

Hey @catconfusion. I had the GTT test as my mum has type 1. I have heard though that if your bump is measuring big you might be put forward for the test as they would want to check if baby is measuring big.

@Kiki061190 it’s good they’ve measured you. Where I am in the east of England they don’t measure until 28 weeks. I’ve expressed concerns about a big bump since my 16 week appointment and been told it looks and feels completely normal. I do wonder if it will measure big @Amanda81 and they’ll refer me anyway. I guess I’m just surprised at 40 they’re not checking it. xx

@Catconfusion It will be interesting to see how your bump measures! Mines is still so much wider than it is out but people have started asking me when I am due which is actually really nice! Makes it all feel real!

Hi ladies!

How are we? Happy Friday!

@sadtoday21 Have you thought about when you’re going to start packing your hospital bag?

@Catconfusion @bananamonkey How have you both been keeping?

Turns out I have a nice bout of sciatica brought on by pregnancy so heading off to swimming tonight to see if that helps ease the situation 😟

Hey everyone! It’s been a crazy week with work and I’ve been really tired. So just catching up now. On the way to Scotland and I’ve brought more work with me, unfortunately, already starting to regret the long trip. There’s a lady with perfume next to me and I can barely stand it, seems like aversion to smells also returns in third trimester. How is everyone else doing?

@Kiki061190 I haven’t packed a bag yet, I’m thinking I will do it around 35/36 weeks. Is your scan coming up soon?

Thanks for your kind words @Amanda81, I’m going to try to push some deadlines and take it easier but it’s hard. How is your recovery going? Thinking of you!

@bananamonkey thanks for these amazing tips! Please keep them coming as you think about it again for yourself!

@Catconfusion Almost in the third trimester now! How are you feeling?

What do you ladies think about getting a 32 week scan? I had one at 28 weeks and will have another at 36, but I feel it’s not enough.

Hey @Kiki061190 sorry to hear about the sciatica. I hope the swimming has helped and you’re having a good weekend.

@sadtoday21 I hope you’re having a lovely time in Scotland despite the overwhelming smells on the way up. I would say if the scans don’t seem enough, book a 32 week one if you can afford it and it will help with anxiety. I think most problems would have been identified by now so that’s why only ladies with risk factors such as age or health conditions get growth scans. If it’s going to ease your mind though, it’s worth doing.

I’m doing pretty well apart from my tummy getting so big it’s awkward to move around which is a pain as I’m nesting and trying to clean everything. My belly button is nearly out which makes me feel a little squeamish. I’m feeling good in myself though and excited for our first growth scan on Friday. It will be 8 weeks since we saw baby but I’m feeling him near constantly. The movements are so reassuring and lovely I’ve not worried too much about how he is. No doubt I’ll still be nervous on the day of the scan. I’m going to pack a little bag with hospital stuff for in the car. More for me in case something comes up and I need to stay in. I know it’s highly unlikely but good to be prepared. Anyway hope you’re all having a good weekend! Xx

@sadtoday21 scan is next Saturday morning which I’m excited about. I honestly think get a scan if you feel you want one, there’s no point in denying yourself. If you want to see baby boy go see him! Take it easy in terms of travelling and try and get some rest up in scotland, don’t work too hard!

@Catconfusion I hear ya about the bump getting uncomfortable! I’m only 5ft 1 and it’s a struggle bending down 😂 how exciting you get to see him on the scan! It will be amazing. You’re smart though to have a bag because you never know what can happen.

Hi everyone, I wondered if you’d mind me joining you? Found out that I’m pregnant last Saturday and really feeling all over the place. We have a three year old DS and I have had two miscarriages since. We we’re trying so seeing those two lines appear was wonderful but...I feel so cautious. I wasn’t expecting to feel this way at all. My last miscarriage was in August so not that long ago. When you e found out we were expecting that time, the joy was overwhelming. We were in our excited little bubble for a couple of weeks before the awful miscarriage. So I guess the way I’m feeling now is just instinctive self-protection. Have started reading through this thread and you give me hope!

@Kiki061190 I’m not much taller than you but I’m short in the body so it’s a big bump in a small area. I think it can’t hurt to have a bag in the car. I’m sure it’s unlikely the baby would come this early but if I did need monitoring for some reason I’ll have some stuff. Xx

@mamaB80 it’s so hard after loss. I’ve had two losses too. We really let our guard down with the first one especially as we were nearly at 12 weeks. I’m now 27 weeks with healthy baby boy.

Take each day as it comes and just focus on each milestone. There’s plenty of support on this thread too. We’ve all been there. Will you get a reassurance scan? xx

@MamaB80 Welcome! Congratulations on your pregnancy. I think once you have experienced a loss you will always have an anxiety surrounding a pregnancy. It doesn’t stop the further you get on! I’m 26 + 3 just now with a baby girl and I’ve had anxiety on and off. This thread has been a lifeline for me 💓

@Catconfusion Babies are funny, they choose when they come! You never know and it’s good you’ll be prepared. When do you think is a good time to pack a hospital bag? I was going to do it about 32 weeks?

@kiki061190 and @Catconfusion thank you both for your lovely welcome!

My first miscarriage was a mmc at 10 weeks. We’d gone for a private scan and I’ll never forget that moment, the pause in the consultants chatter, then the realisation that what was on the screen wasn’t what we’d seen with our first. No little fluttering heartbeat. That was over two years ago and by the time I got pregnant in August we were ready for it and so excited, just like the first time. But I started bleeding at just 6 weeks and it was over. Early or not (I had a few comments that ”at least it happened early on”, the pain was so raw. Anyway, sorry to go on...yes, we’ll be getting a scan at 7-8 weeks. I don’t think we can get it via the nhs here but if not it’s worth paying for the piece of mind.

How lovely that you’re both so close in due dates! And congratulations on get to 26 and 27 weeks! I loved that stage with my DS, felt and looked pregnant without being ginormous (it just looking like I’d eaten all the pies!). And so nice to hear you talking about them moving. It’s the best feeling! I hope you’re both feeling well. Do you work? If so, when are you starting mat leave? And I agree that there’s no harm in having a bag packed and ready just in case! and finally, I’m 5ft 2 so feeling part of this club!!

Hey @MamaB80 I’m so sorry you went through a mmc. Such a heartbreaking way to find out too. It sounds very similar to my experience. I got a bit of spotting at just over 10 weeks but the midwife wouldn’t refer me for a scan. We paid privately and found it was a mmc. I had an ERPC and then fell pregnant again about four weeks later but started spotting at the 5 week mark. This was all early last year straight after our honeymoon so super traumatic and not how we’d planned to start married life. Luckily in August we found out about this little monkey and he’s stuck around so we’re over the moon.

I’m also sorry people have used the dreaded ‘At least...’ Any sentence starting with this minimises your loss and comes across mean, even if there are the best intentions.

Such a shame you can’t get an EPU scan based on your history. We were lucky and got fortnightly scans until 16 weeks with this pregnancy From 6 weeks but I know that’s quite rare. Definitely worth paying for to help your mental health.

Arrrh thank you. This is a lovely thread that started as a mmc thread and we all got pregnant fairly close together so it is nice. Some of us have had multiple losses as well so lovely we all progressing well.

This is a lovely stage of pregnancy as the anxiety has largely melted away due to the movements and stats being very good for a healthy baby. I did however pop very early so I am very big for the stage I’m at. I’m struggling with all kinds of things I didn’t expect to struggle with. Bump is all out front and is a boy (not sure if that is why). I was very ill with hyperemesis for 3 months so honestly I’m just relieved I’ve stopped being sick. I’m feeling pretty good in myself as well. Mobility is the only issue although I do have arthritis in my hips so that’s not helping.

Anyway I hope the next couple of weeks goes quickly until you can get that scan. One thing that helped me was reading that 2 mcs can just be bad luck statistically speaking. Your chances are still very good that this will work out. We’re here if you need support and a hand hold. It is really hard in the first 12 weeks after loss. Xx

@MamaB80 I know what you mean, it really is a heart sinking moment and you just know instinctively something is wrong. I knew that when I had my scan. It was my first ever pregnancy and thankfully I fell pregnant again 8 weeks after! Yes I work full time, how about yourself? I’m planning on finishing the last week in March at 37 weeks. I want as much time with baby as possible 💓 I’ll be taking a year off!

@MamaB80 meant to say I’m self employed but have been off work for a while due to the miscarriages and the hyperemesis in this pregnancy. I’m now not able to sit for very long at a desk so I’ve given up trying to get back to work until baby is here.x

Hi Ladies, hope you all had good weekends. Sorry about your work stress @sadtoday21 I hope it can start to ease up soon. That's rubbish about the smell, I struggled with coffee before, every time I went into the staff kitchen it made me feel .

Your scans are so close now @Catconfusion and @Kiki061190! Sorry to hear about your sciatica @Kiki061190 hope the swimming has helped.

All pretty quiet over here, 26 weeks today and no appointments for a couple of weeks now. I don't have any scans planned for rest of pregnancy which feels weird but OK provided she stays nice and active. I'm in touch with a MW to arrange a hypnobirthing refresher which is making it feel a bit real - eek! And DD has been ill for a few days and waking up every few hours so I'm getting the sleep deprivation practice in

Welcome and congratulations @MamaB80, I'm really sorry for your losses . I also had an MMC, not discovered till the 12 week scan so I can relate to that awful moment the sonographer goes quite, one of the worst moments of my life as I'd also been in my naive happy bubble after 1 easy pregnancy before. Then I had 3 chemical pregnancies in a row and now am 26 weeks. I found the first 12 weeks tough this time anxiety-wise and haven't really felt I could be happy/enjoy it until after 20 weeks, it is tough. I found the best thing was to take it 1 day at a time (I read somewhere about "today I am pregnant") and set little milestones like that early scan to work towards. Hope you can find some comfort here, these threads have been a lifesaver for me x