Pregnancy after MMC

[sadtoday21]

Hi everyone! I moved our thread over here so we can all keep in touch as we continue on this journey.

Many congratulations again to @Amanda81 on the birth of your beautiful baby girl Holly! Our first baby on the thread. Also tagging the regulars @Catconfusion @Kiki061190 @bananamonkey. Newcomers welcome as well!

I’m glad it helped @sadtoday21 I think I read an article about the placenta issues you mentioned. It does seem in these cases the placenta is very small and the baby therefore is small too and not thriving. I think a scan now so you can see what centile your baby is now would be really helpful. From what I gather the placenta doesn’t just stop working overnight, it’s more a gradual decline. If a baby is massively overdue however it can break down more quickly as it’s starting to degrade. That’s why over 40 they induce early because it’s more likely to not go the distance. Also why the growth scans are necessary.

I don’t think it will matter how much you’re told most pregnancies end well. You had a significant trauma that told you differently. It makes complete sense you’re feeling anxious and worrying about the things that could go wrong. I really hope your midwife or GP will refer you for a scan to double check all ok and for your mental health.

I’m definitely coming around to having the injections. It was just a shock after being told all along I’m low risk to then be told I’m high risk. I’m seeing the midwife this afternoon so hopefully she can put my mind at risk. xx

*rest

So I saw the midwife. She thinks I should wait until my next appointment in two and a bit weeks to start the heparin so I can ask the doctor questions. I’m pleased to say no protein in my sample and everything was normal. She said I haven’t been measured because I’m having the growth scans so no need. Also they don’t weigh during pregnancy, they go by the booking in bmi so I’m considered a healthy weight. She did say she can tell my weight gain is just baby and isn’t concerned. She was horrified at the consultants comments. As for the GD, I just have to wait for the test. She didn’t seem overly concerned. Baby is definitely head down. It’s the arch of his back in the middle of my tummy which is a good position but she’s said he could move. All in all I think I’m a bit more reassured. Xx

Hey everyone

I've been following your updates...but not had the opportunity to sit down and write a reply. I have a day to myself today (away from the baby) so am catching up on getting in touch with peeps. I do feel really bad for not staying actively in touch, but it's so hard to find the time...so not putting pressure on myself. Please no that I am still here and keeping up to speed with all of your developments...and thank you for the mentions...it's nice not to feel forgotten xx

I hope all of you are doing well. I see that you have had a disappointing appointment @Catconfusion - really sorry that this happened. Positive that you might be able to have water brith! That would be amazing. What's the update on the other medication that has been prescribed? Are you holding off from taking it? I do think it's good that they are doing the GTT test. Your little boy does appear to be growing very healthily! I hope they have a consensus for the right birth plan for you, nothing worse when they don't all agree or if you don't have confidence in what they are saying. Great news that baby is head down! Let's hope he stays comfortable in that position xx

@Sadtoday21 I can't believe you are only a month away from 36 weeks! Time is going by so very quickly. How are you doing? Xx

Lovely news about your friend @bananamonkey - it's nice to hear stories where people who has suffered loss get their dream baby. And to have the birth experience that she wanted, well that just makes it all the better. How are you coping with pregnancy and having a small child? Hope all is okay with you xx

Well done for getting to 28 weeks @kiki...I only put on a stone through my pregnancy, some women just don't put on much. A week postpartum I was back to my usual weight (which I am grateful for). Hope all is good with you xx

Holly was 5 weeks on Tuesday. She has grown massively from the 5lb 13oz...she is now 8lbs 1oz , which was on Tuesday when the health visitor weighed her. I won't lie, I'm still finding it hard with the newborn regime, but at a just over 4 weeks something clicked...I think it was me getting some confidence that I was starting to read her better. We have now been out for dinner a few times and are starting to feel like we have settled into the new normal. She is struggling with passing her 💩 and has some congestion, but we finding methods to help her with these, but it is slow progress. Other than that she is an adorable baby, rarely cries unless she is in discomfort. I got the all clear to drive again on Monday, which has given me some independence back...felt good to get behind the wheel. My wound has also started to heel and stopped bleeding last week...feeling more normal now and still feel blessed to have her.

Love and hugs to all xxx

Hey @Amanda81 it’s great to hear how you’re getting on. Don’t worry at all about being absent. We all completely understand. It sounds like you’ve doing so well. Great you have a routine and new normal. Also that you can drive again.

As for me, I’m still waiting to see the consultant again to answer my questions about injectable heparin. I couldn’t get through to his secretary and no one showed me how to use it. My GP and midwife haven’t been able to help so I will wait until the 7th Feb and start if he can reassure me it’s necessary.

I’m so glad I did the GD test. I had it today but wish I could have done it earlier when I originally asked for it. Baby is very healthy and there’s something about a bigger baby that makes me feel more confident. Very small babies seem more of a worry. He’s 3 and a half pounds already at 28 weeks. I do hope it’s not because of GD though. I hope he stays head down too! I’m sure the birth plan will naturally evolve as we get closer in!

Take care and don’t worry if it’s a while before you can comment again. We understand! xx

@Catconfusion good that you had the GD test and you are feeling confident that all is well after your midwife appointment. I think its wise to discuss the injections with your consultant again. Also, makes perfect sense the midwife wouldn't measure you if you are having regular growth scans! The measuring seems like a bit of a joke to me tbh.

@Amanda81 great to hear from you and that you are getting into more of a routine now! It sounds like you are recovering well and starting to feel more confident about everything. Also nice that you can drive again and regain some independence! I thought it might be six weeks or so before I'd be able to leave baby because of the feeding, but I guess that's not entirely the case?

@Kiki061190 how are you feeling? Any improvement on the cold front?

@bananamonkey hope you are keeping well too!

I'm 33 weeks today. Insomnia hit full force last night and DH found me under the covers at 5.30 am reading about SARS, so he brought me a granola bar and milk. It must have been an odd scene, but baby was hungry and kicking me awake (something he never does, but maybe I was partially awake already from constant bathroom trips)! So now I'm feeling exhausted and I still have a cold. Part of the insomnia is me worrying about the baby tbh and I think I've held out as long as I can without going in for monitoring. I'm not sure the kicking pattern is different really, I'm just extremely anxious that no one is looking at his growth or the placenta and I'm not sure whether he kicks as much as he should at this stage. I want to book a private scan right now but they don't use the doppler until 37 weeks. So I'm going to monitor him closely today and go in tonight or tomorrow if I don't feel better about it. I just hope they do a doppler scan soon, even though it probably won't be the same day as the ctg. Feeling very exhausted...

Hi @Amanda81, lovely to hear from you, don't worry about not keeping up you've got a lot going on! The first few weeks are so tough even without the sleep deprivation, sounds like you're doing well and great that you can drive again. I remember having a similar revelation regarding routine, it just takes a while to get to know the signs and what they want, it gets easier x x

All fine here, not going to lie it's tough with a toddler (and a job) but just because there's no time for yourself and it's more tiring! I'm feeling well though so can't complain although the insomnia is kicking in now which is really helpful when you need sleep! Had my GD test today and MW next week so looking forward to hearing the hb again

@Catconfusion So sorry you haven’t had clarity, it’s hard when people recommend different things. I think it’s great baby boy is big and it’s a relief for this stage as if you’re were to go earlier he would be a good weight.

@Amanda81 so lovely to hear from you. Oh the newborn stage I can imagine is a lot to adjust to. You have to get to know your tiny human and read them. It takes time! You will smash it! My bump is measuring slightly smaller but I had a private scan and know baby is 2 and a half pounds roughly now so she’s about where she should be. That gives me reassurance!

@sadtoday21 I’m so sorry the anxiety has been so awful for you throughout this pregnancy! I had it until about 20 weeks and feel I’ve relaxed a lot since the 20 week scan but I have been lucky with movement. I wouldn’t say I notice a pattern but more that I feel her pretty much every hour which keeps me happy. If you are getting stressed about it then I would get yourself scanned whether it is the NHS or privately, your mental health is so important!

@bananamonkey Oh I hear ya about the sleep! I am up 5 times a night to pee! I can’t get a full night 😂

Hey @catconfusion - when will you get your GTT results back? I got mine the next day as I was visiting the MW...hopefully you get them back soon. I know what you mean about bigger babies. When I was told I was looking to have an 8 pounder it made me feel confident that she would be healthy, I also recall that when I was told holly was under 6lbs my first concern was 'was she okay'...of course she was, but it makes you worry.

I know what you mean about the worrying @Sadtoday21 - I do look back and think all the worry was for nothing, but at the time there was nothing I could do to make me think that all was okay. It's difficult. All I will say, is that once your little baby is here, the worry is shared with your OH. You don't stop worrying, it's just a different kind of worry. I constantly look at her when she is in a deep sleep thinking is she still breathing. As long as you are feeling kicking and movements, I would take some comfort in that, but do go and get monitored to make sure all is okay and to ease your anxiety. There is no point in going through this feeling anxious, as it's not good for you or your little one. I'm sure all will be just perfect. I'm able to have a day away as I am combination feeding...some people don't like this but it is working for me and baby and also my business. I think she will end up being more formula fed when the work commitments pick up.

@bananamonkey - a job aswell. I forgot about the workload. You are a super woman!

Good to hear from you @Kiki061190 - so true about it taking time to understand the quirks and cues.

I'm on my way home now from a day in London for a meeting. It's been a lovely day for remember what my life was like before baby arrived, but I am missing her so much. Only 1.5 hours until I see her again. Couldn't imagine life without her now xx

Arh @Amanda81 she’s adorable. I can imagine it was nice to have a day away but being away must have been tough.

I’ve been told to ring up on Wednesday if I haven’t heard. It’s good he’s big but he is sooo big. Everyone I tell seems to gasp. If it’s not GD I’m sure it will be fine though. My sister had my nephew naturally and he was nearly 11 lbs without stitches.

@Kiki061190 definitely a relief that he’s a good birth weight if he was premature.

@bananamonkey glad you’ve got the gd test done and midwife soon too. We were in and out very quickly. It was pretty straight forward really.

@sadtoday21 I hear you on the not sleeping front. I’ve got into a habit of getting up for the toilet, coming back to DH snoring, the cat jumping on me and then baby starting to kick. I was up at 3am this morning because of it.

I hope you get on ok if you do go in for monitoring. You’re right to go if it’s troubling you so much and you’re worried. xx

So sweet @Amanda81!

Hope you’ve been able to get some rest last night and the anxiety is better @sadtoday21, good luck if you do see someone today.

Yes mine was pretty swift too @Catconfusion, there was only one other woman at the GTT clinic and she was an hour late. My normal MW was there too so they decided to take my 28 week bloods at the same time so I’ll have the results for my appointment next week, efficient!

@bananamonkey I’m wondering if we were in the same place. I was at the n&n phlebotomy and there was no one there. No midwifes around. Glad it was swift though. Lots of ladies talk about how horrendous it is but the worst thing for me was not eating. Even that though wasn’t too hard. DH made me a lovely packed lunch for when we were done. Xx

@Catconfusion I was at the community hospital, they do a GTT clinic and a MW clinic in case if you ever can’t get in to see your normal one.

@bananamonkey arh I see! Mine was arranged late so might be why I was at the n&n. I can’t believe we’re all so far in now. It’s amazing! xx

Hi ladies! Happy Sunday!

Finally getting a moment to sit down and catch up! We’ve had storage built into each of our bedrooms this week and now we have to paint all the new woodwork (OH is taking up this job) but between that, working full time and having the cold I’m absolutely exhausted! I’m just planning on cleaning the house and organising some bits today. I have full on organisation head on and nesting mode has kicked in!

@sadtoday21 Did you get monitored? I hope you are feeling less anxious, you are so close to the end!

@Catconfusion @bananamonkey How have you ladies been feeling?

Hey @kiki061190

Wow that’s a lot of stuff to do. More storage space sounds wise. I’m nesting and getting organised too. Mainly selling stuff on Ebay so I can clear space. I’m feeling pretty ok thanks. Baby had a slow day yesterday which worried me a bit but he’s full on kicking again today. I have physio on Friday so making sure I keep up with my exercises.

@sadtoday21 how are the movements now? Did you go and get monitored? Xx

@Catconfusion Baby girl was a tad quieter last night but she picked up again. I’m trying to listen to my body as I’m finding it’s telling me when I need some rest ect. It’s crazy how much space you need, I have so much stuff for baby. Are you going to wash the clothes before the birth?

@Kiki061190 @Catconfusion thanks for asking after me! I did go in and the ctg looked fine. They didn't do a doppler scan or growth scan, but they did take a quick look at amniotic fluid levels using a small computer handheld scan. It wasn't as detailed a medical check as I would have liked, but I was very happy to see the doctor and have at least a few checks. I have a midwife appointment this week and my detailed scan on the nhs is in three weeks, so hopefully that will get me through the next few weeks, as long as baby is kicking. He's a little quiet this morning, so I'm having a late breakfast and hoping he starts soon. I might talk to the midwife again about my anxiety, it seems a bit out of control tbh, but I'm not sure what she can really do except recommend talking to someone, which I don't find really helpful. February is also just a really hard month for me, so it makes sense that my anxiety is going to start getting worse around this time.

@Kiki061190 it sounds like you are in full on nesting mode! You must be exhausted with all that going on - when do you finish work again? I am starting to feel the nesting kicking in too - I have one more week of solid work or so and then I am going to try to turn to house things. So far I have frozen only one dish and stockpiled a few essentials! But I did buy a gorgeous changing bag yesterday that will double as my hospital bag and I'm really really pleased with it. It has insulated compartments for bottles, breast pumps, lots of pockets and storage, and even a laptop compartment so I can work outside at cafes once in a while! And its black with gold accents, which is really my style. Looks like a chic work bag, but with the functionality of a diaper bag. So now I want to pack the hospital bag in earnest - bought the labour gown today and will start putting some toiletries and snacks inside. I think I will also buy some premade aptamil bottles just in case and put one in the bag too - I plan to bf, but scared it might not work out. What did you decide to buy for it the end?

@Catconfusion sorry to hear you had a slow day yesterday, it can really be so worrying and feel like such a heavy responsibility when its only you looking out for changes in movement. Glad to hear he's kicking strong today. How are you doing in terms of getting everything sorted? Are you mostly ready now? When do you get your GTT results back?

@bananamonkey any tips for the fourth trimester? Any books you found useful? Hope you are keeping well with your toddler and the pregnancy! Must be exhausting!

@Amanda81 how are you feeling? Hope you are fully recovered now and managing to get a bit of sleep here and there. Thinking of you Xxx.

@Kiki061190 I think I am just going to wash the vests that touch their skin and the sheets also. I feel its kind of a shame to wash brand new outfits as they won't seem so new anymore after and we don't have a dryer so they won't be soft (how do British people keep clothes and towels soft without a dryer??). What kind of detergent are you going to use? Will you wash everything?

@Kiki061190 yes we’ll wash enough to get us through the first couple of weeks. We had a look at what we have and it’s difficult to know what size we’ll need since he’s looking big. He might go straight into 0-3 months. Although I’ve been told to keep some newborn things as they quite often shrink a bit after birth. I guess we’ll wash a selection. Like you we have so much stuff now!

@sadtoday21 it was a little odd but I’m convinced it’s the position he’s in. I was aware of him Wriggling a bit so wasn’t too concerned. It was a relief to feel some kicks and even some little hiccup feelings this morning.

I’m glad you went and got monitored. Also that it’s helped with the anxiety. I would definitely talk to the midwife about it again. It’s completely understandable and please don’t think you should be feeling anything other than how you feel. February is understandably tough and maybe it is a case of just getting through each day. I’d like to think the midwife has some other suggestions other than just talking to someone. How are you getting on with buying things? I know that side of getting ready has been tough.

We have pretty much everything done. Just need a mattress for the mini cot we’re using downstairs. I also need to pack my hospital bag. I’ll get it done by the next appointment in two weeks I think since baby is big just in case. My blood test results should be in by Wednesday but she said I probably would have got a call on Friday if a problem. I didn’t so theres a good chance I’m in the clear. Xx

Oh @sadtoday21 I’m glad you went in and baby boy is doing good. You are so close to the end, it is completely understandable that your anxiety is heightened. I think I am also going to grab some of those pre made bottles as well for the hospital bag! I am planning on breastfeeding but i think it’s wise to have something as a back up just in case. Also I have no idea! Do I just wash in my regular non bio detergent? I’m allergic to biological powder so we need to use non bio. I got rid of my dryer as I literally never used it and gave it to a family member. I finish March 27th! Seems so far away but I want most things ready for then as I’d really like a couple of weeks to myself to relax before baby is here if that makes sense? I don’t want to be scrambling to get things sorted in those couple of weeks.

@Catconfusion How crazy we are talking about packing hospital bags though? This has all come around so quickly! We are almost there 🌈 Haha I found the baby having hiccups funny as she likes to lie with her back to my stomach, I can feel them more internally and it’s an odd feeling 😂

You know I’ve been thinking about the ladies on the TTC after MMC thread, I hope there are some more BFPs on that thread. I’d love to see them over here!

@Kiki061190 it’s so funny when they hiccup. I’m wondering if it’s practice breathing.

I’ve been thinking about the others too. I tried to find them. It looks like they joined another thread. It looks like Sunstrck got a bfp. I wasn’t sure whether to tag her or not as it’s early days. It’s the ttc penguins after mc thread they are on. I didn’t see Mrs on there. It was a shame really but so hard to keep up the chat as we got further into the pregnancy. I didn’t want to upset them or make them feel like it wasn’t a safe space. Anyway, I hope they are getting on ok. Xx

@Catconfusion OMG she got a bfp!!! That is amazing and totally makes me smile. What fabulous news 💓 I know so many BFP came on that thread at one time, so unexpectedly as well. We’re all so close in due dates so it must have been hard to read. I can’t believe we’re all in the third trimester now. I feel like I still have ages but when I break down my days off and what I have to get done round the house it isn’t a lot of time 🤭 it’s been passing quickly! I still need to buy a couple of bits as well 🤨

@kiki061190 it’s lovely news. I didn’t say anything as I didn’t want to seem weird.

Yes it’s certainly coming around quickly. I can’t believe I’m 29 weeks. I guess since I know he’s likely to come early I’m feeling like we don’t have long. It could even be 8/9 weeks. It’s so exciting but scary at the same time! Xx

Morning ladies, hope you had nice weekends!

So glad you got checked out @sadtoday21 and that the little dude is looking fine, please do speak to your MW about your anxiety, everything gets magnified in pregnancy I think. Just take it one day at a time, my friend also struggled (previous anxiety + IVF + some health concerned about the baby) but I know she got some help from her MW and GP x

I used a sensitive washing liquid for baby stuff, not sure how necessary it is (and I should probably stop using it now for dd ). I'm not sure I have any 4th trimester tips (I'm no expert and very baby is different) but hopefully your antenatal classes will cover a lot, I think mostly it's about your expectations. If you know about it already then you have some understanding that it's a tough transition for babies (other animals gestate for longer but because our brains evolved to be so big it was a trade off between getting the baby out and doing more development outside the womb) so they want to be near you all the time, plus waking every couple of hours is completely normal. Also I didn't have a clue about breastfeeding so it's useful to understand the basics of things like the latch, feeding cues, different positions to try, the fact that they are not on a regular four hour feeding schedule, cluster feeding etc.* Find out where your nearest BF clinic is so you know where to go if you do find things tough, your HV will be able to help with this. Don't worry about establishing a routine for a good month or so until you get to know them better.

• they have a magic ability to know when you're sitting down for your dinner, my DH cut up many meals for me so I could eat one-handed!

Most importantly, it is really hard, don't worry if you find it tough but it does get easier quickly. And seek help if you need to.

I think I have all my NCT and Hypnobirthing resources saved I'd be happy to share by email if anyone would be interested. The Wonderweeks book/app is good and more about birth but this book is great:

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B0050OM3WE/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_d_asin_title_o03?psc=1&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&ie=UTF8

Your changing bag sounds lovely

Wow you are sounding lovely and organised @Kiki061190 and @Catconfusion! I'm still in denial about there being an actual baby here. That's so great about Sunstruck, I was thinking about Mrs the other week but I couldn't find the old thread to see her full username, hope she's OK.

All OK here, struggling a bit with sleeping which is annoying as I'm really tired but have the MW on Wednesday which I'm looking forward to as it's been so long since November, looking forward to hearing the heartbeat again. Weekends are hard because I'm on my feet more and worry that she's gone a bit quiet but then I feel her again at the end of the day, it's so annoying that your brain leaps to the worst conclusions, I'm finding this part a lot more stressful this time. I haven't felt any hiccups yet although dd had them constantly towards the end so maybe soon.