The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread#5 - 🐧 The Penguin Huddle 🐧

[InDreamland]

This is a safe space and supportive thread for anyone who is pregnant following a loss. We all understand the worry and anxiety that can come from being pregnant again following miscarriage/stillbirth.

Please feel free to join, even if you were not on the TTC thread.

Starting the roll call copied from the last thread (please feel free to add your name or amend if due dates have changed following 12 week scans or booking in c-secs):

@Melpops36, 38, EDD 5/12/19
@Beaglemum93, 26, EDD 22/12/19
@Amanda81, 38, EDD 27/12/19
@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, 37, EDD 03/01/20
@Laney79, 40, EDD 06/01/20
@Bluebelltulip, 29, EDD 09/01/20
@KnitKitty, 31, EDD 29/01/20
@Newbie21, 38, EDD 06/02/20
@InDreamland, 39, EDD 18/02/20
@Tina363,29, EDD 26/02/20
@Frillyfarmer, 29, EDD 28/02/20
@Squiff70, 37, EDD end of February (no exact date with twins)
@Strawberry, 28, EDD 08/03/20
@Ginmonkey84, 34, EDD 16/03/20
@DuvetCaterpillar, 34, EDD 27/03/2020
@Navy123, 29, EDD 10/04/20
@Janey15, 34, EDD 16/04/20
@TinyPaws, 22, EDD 19/04/20
@Flyfisherlady, 37, Edd 24/04/20
@FirstTimeMama91, 28, EDD 06/05/2020

Also tagging @boboelephant and @Yukka just to hope they can pop on and update on their rainbows.

Sorry to anyone I've missed 🐧

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue that does sound odd but glad it has been confirmed.

@ChikTIKI hopefully a restful day will help you, don't worry about not doing activities with your DD, I love it when I can introduce something I used to love watching. I suspect mine will be watching more TV than normal over the next few weeks.

That is so odd? @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue My only thinking is that maybe its a formality thing they have to get the hospital to sign off, which is 99% of the time a yes and so that is why they agreed to the date?

So I have my first proper consultant meeting tomorrow. What sort of things should I think to ask her? I'm seeing her due to premature birth and sepsis history.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue this doesn't surprise me, the nhs have a reputation for being shit with their dates. I know some people are very lucky and get a date nice and early, but its the norm towait til 36 weeks and then it's often not clear when the date will be. I'm afraid thats the way the nhs works when it comes to ops.

@Rubyroost sorry you're also feeling the exhaustion. I do like my hair at the moment, shame that will go once I'm no longer pregnant. Make sure you rest as much as you can. The weeing isn't too awful, needing as much as I expected for this stage in pregnancy I guess. I agree the dreams are odd and weird and I guess linked to anxieties we may have.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue WTF???? I mean great it's confirmed now but that's just way out of line to make you believe it was all booked when it wasn't.

@TwittleBee hope consultant appointment goes well!

Glad to say my manager is cool with my leave request so it's all set, I finish work at 36 weeks with maternity leave kicking in at 39 weeks. Just 6 weeks to go! Am 30+1 today and I still feel in denial and like this isn't real and isn't happening. Got the NHS antenatal class on Saturday and think we'll pop into asda afterwards to pick up the free bounty pack. I'm still expecting something to go wrong. After all these years I can't believe we're at this stage. Still not bought a single thing.

Happy polling day everyone. Please use your power to vote and think carefully about the NHS when choosing who to vote for. As a healthcare professional I don't think it will last another conservative government. Don't know what we've got until it's gone...

@stawberrye Hear, hear.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue My goodness what a stress that you could have done without! Please don't feel bad/embarrassed about your outburst... It sounds like it was (unfortunately) necessary for you to be heard and I think you would have regretted not doing what you did more.

@TwittleBee Good luck at your appointment today. I think questions may come to you as you sit there. I expect you will want to know about how they will be handling your care given your history and I think you should leave the appointment today feeling like there is some kind of plan in place. I can't think of anything specific you should think to ask as I haven't seen a consultant for the same reasons as you, but my advice is to take a notebook with questions you have written down and don't be afraid to write down things that you are told during the appointment... Sometimes a few hours later you forget exactly what has been said, and after years of being in and out of hospitals that's the best advice I can give. Doctors never mind you pausing for a minute to write something down.

@Rubyroost I tend to get up once to twice a night, which doesn't seem excessive. I think it's normal to need to go more.
Apparently I have started snoring a lot recently...

@Bluebelltulip How are you doing? xx

I've been super uncomfortable recently. I'm hoping it's a good sign that Baby Girl is growing nicely, but yesterday evening it felt like she had her bum right in my rib-cage and she wouldn't budge. I could not get comfy. Acid reflux has ampted it up a gear too.
Driving home from work is getting very uncomfy too... She seems to wiggle upwards during the day and I have to drive with my back arched. Got stuck in traffic the other day and actually just lent over to one side for a while when stationary.
I keep telling her she's worth it and to keep growing, but it is getting hard! I think maybe it's also to do with my womb... It's completely over to the right so I'm carrying the entire pregnancy on one side (it even looks lopsided sometimes), and I think because of the weird shape of my womb it's affecting the space she has to grow in to and so she's getting under my ribs a lot as she can't spread out to the side.

I officially start maternity leave on 6th January, but because of Christmas and New Year I only now have 9 and a half working days left...
I've made it to 33 weeks now, anyway so feeling loads better about if I have to have her early.
My hospital bag is now ready to go. I've done a load of laundry and feel 'ready' for if she comes early.

@strawberrye I hear you! Both my parents are retired nurses and we have also relied so much on the NHS for various things. My vote makes zero difference though, I live in one of the safest Tory seats constituencies in the country so my vote whatever I do with it makes not one bit of difference.

@KnitKitty you must be so relieved to be finishing work soon. I get the snoring, I'm definitely snoring more now! Nice to hear you feel ready, so lovely to hear you sounding positive. The acid reflux is horrible isn't it!

Hope today goes well @TwittleBee!

I'm feeling sorry for myself still. This damn cold isn't shifting and I still have a sore throat. It's been just over a week now. Bubsy been very quiet this morning. Was really wriggly yesterday and last night and woke me up in the early hours this morning but since I woke up about 6:30am I've not felt anything which is unusual. I have been rushing about and hoping I've just not noticed. Hoping the rest of the tube journey in I'll get some kicking as I always feel movement on the train. So far nothing though.

@Twittlebee good luck today, I agree with Knitkitty that writing things down is useful, it's easy to forget little bits and pieces. I would hope that a rough plan is in place so that you know what to expect but obviously it will be subject to change.

@InDreamland yay only 6 weeks of work left for you!. Hope you find the class helpful and feel more prepared which will hopefully help you start to get things ready.

@Knitkitty sorry to hear that you are feeling uncomfortable, how long is your drive? In my first pregnancy I was happily driving for a few hours at term but it's been much more uncomfortable this time (different car though). Thank you for asking after me, I'm finding the wait really hard, I'm worrying about movements constantly even when the baby is moving. DH is struggling with it too.

Wow, so many of us in the final stretch! 34 weeks for me as of yesterday. I haven’t done my hospital bag yet but know I need to get on it - despite reading all the lists I don’t feel quite confident on how to pack for myself. I don’t have spares of a lot of maternity stuff and it seems likely that I will be wearing a lot of it as I try to stay cosy over the next few weeks!

I’m struggling a bit with transportation too, I take the school bus and some buses we get are fine on my back but others make me feel really unsupported and I need to lean over.

We’re in the midst of NCT at the moment and I have to say while I find the classes decent the timing is a massive pain, our classes are Tues &Thurs from 7-10 PM 😩 They were the only time we could make it work.

@Bluebelltulip really hope that the worry eases although I know that is unlikely given everything you've been through. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for both of you. Just hoping that things do go smoothly. Thanks, I am so relieved to only have 6 weeks of work left. The discomfort is gradually increasing. Especially the commute on the tube - woman on way home whilst I was waiting for passengers to get off the train before I tried to board was pushing me from behind. Like I can really force my way on when theres loads trying to get off - don't need to risk bump getting bashed. FFS some people are so impatient. I felt like having a go but it's just not worth it.

@coconutlatte44 I am with you on not having many spares of maternity clothes, deliberately have the bare minimum needed to get through a week. Will you be getting a bus to the hospital when you go into labour? The NCT classes and some others I saw were inconvenient times for us too. I mean we both work full time up in central London so to try fit those classes in was just annoying so I'm glad we now have a 1 day full day intensive class on Saturday with the NHS and it's also way cheaper than NCT or other similar courses.

I wouldn't worry too much about hospital bag as you can always send partner back for more stuff if you're in for longer than expected. Nappies maternity pads, and sleepsuits and vests for baby (think I took about 4 of each. Then some pjs and dressing gowns plus a book if in for induction. Simples, done. 👍Then send partner back home if you need anything else.
I'll be taking my pump this time too, after health support worker (don't think she was midwife) was a complete bitch last time and refused to get anyone to help me hand express.

Oh and I'll be taking some big knickers in that will go over my c section incision. Big knickers are also useful to fit the maternity pads in

Starting a new thread, this one is getting full!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/3767241-The-Graduates-of-TTC-after-pregnancy-loss-thread-6-The-Penguin-Huddle?watched=1

Hi all,

Great to see you're all doing well!

Ava continues to make progress. She is 3 weeks old today.

Why has this thread been moved to ante-natal clubs? Can somebody please tag me in the new thread? I found it earlier but can't now!

Ignore that... found it!