Due Dec 2007 - finding out the flavours

[mixedmama]

Hey all... over here!!

Has anybody who is on number 2 or more and currently working thinking about whether they will be going back after this one?

Hmm potty training - all good fun! I did DS1 when he was about 2 and 4 months and it took ages! I think in the end I just used to take him to the toilet every hour and reward him with a treat if he managed to go, was a long haul though and with hindsight he was not really ready (it was just me wanting him done before DS2 arrived). Decided with DS2 to leave him until he was much older but he had other ideas and was ready at 2 and 4 months and was done (nightime too as he refused to wear one) within a week. My advice would be to ignore anyone who says they should be trained by such-and-such an age and do it when they are ready, far less stressful!
As for beds, DS1 was in a low bed (with one of those soft Tomy bed rails) at about 17 months, DS2 was about 14 months and both slept much better.
Good news about your DDs kidneys Buzzybee!
Good luck with your scan today Insy, hope it goes well!
Mixedmama, are you due a scan soon? I am sure your LO is fine, probably just kicking towards the back so you don't feel it, there is still a lot of room in there for him/her to move around. If you are worried though I would speak to your MW, they could at least listen for baby's HB for reassurance.
Cazzybabs, that poor woman losing her son , I don't think I could bear it .

Cazzy - I kept meaning to post something about the lady who lost her son, but I just didnt know what to say so chose to say nothing. I just think I would completely collapse would not wish anything like that on my worst enemy.

My scan is not until 23 weeks so 7 Sept... i still get my abdominal pain so uterus is still stretching. Not sure whether to be worried or not, especially since this number two. I also am carrying alot of excess weight this time, sp perhaps that contributes.... my midwife is awful so not sure how accomodating she will be seeing as I am 19 weeks this week she is the type of person to say it is too early anyway.

ohhh... just got a kick in the ribs. YAY

mixed - at my 16week appointment , my midwife did the listening for heartbeat thing, so she should be pretty good at 19 weeks.

ive not got an appointment now until 28 weeks (week beginning 3rd sept) when i need more bloods doing and she will probably start measuring the fundal height - dreading that bit because i look ready to pop already! The joys of carrying a boy differently to girls!

Mixedmama - thinking of going back 4 days a week, after 9 mths M/L. Then when DD is 3 - she should get some free hours at nursery so will go back FT after that. But the again might change my mind at the last minute!

Ski - did try the Walk in/walk out method but DD cried loads and DH thought it was too cruel (!) so gave up after a couple of days!

Talking about scan - next Monday - feeling nervoous - but thinking I will find out what it is, but not going to tell family - want to make it surpirse for them.

Yay! Mixedmama! Glad LO gave you a kick!
JARM, have you found you are carrying much differently to your girls this time? Although people keep telling me how huge I am for 19 weeks I am sure I was bigger with the boys at this stage than with this one, same shape though - all out front like someone has stuck a football under my jumper! My Mum said she carried both me and my brothers exactly the same way and had been convinced I would be a boy.

yay at your kick mixedmama!!

beckle - thanks for the good advice re potty training. I think you're absolutely right, it's not about when it's convenient for you to train them but rather when they are ready. Will definitely hold off a while longer.

I am definitely carrying this baby (boy) different from dd - all out the front like you beckle - much more attractive that the big wide belly I had with dd so v. pleased about that

motherofZ - it's actually the "gradual withdrawal" thing we are trying (bit lower down on the page). I also find the walking in and out a bit mean but shuffling a few inches further towards the door each night seems to be doing the trick to a certain degree and doesn't make her cry. She did get out of bed about 30-40 times last night when we were putting her down last night though - felt like supernanny taking her back time after time. Oh mothering a little baby is so easy compared to all of this!!

Tabimum and claraq, yes i'm really hoping for a VBAC this time. My dh is also away an awful lot of the time (currently in the middle of a 7 week stint with no time whatsoever to come home) so the thought of dealing with a toddler and a newborn pretty much on my own, not to mention along with a c-section wound, well - i can't countenance any other option but than to go for a VBAC and see what happens. The registrar did note "low threshold for CS" on my notes however, which means if i'm slow or things aren't going absolutely smoothly then i'll be taken down to Theatres whatever arguments i come up with!

Buzzybee - more good news from you, i'm really pleased

Neuro - i fell in love with Little Friend (albeit a bit disappointed with the ending, but perhaps that was the author's intention - to leave us feeling a bit empty and confused??). Have you read Secret History?

Insywinsy ? good luck on your scan today

We used cloth with ds, MEOS with airflow wraps mainly, and bought them all from Twinkle and the Nappy Lady. I have to admit though, the bigger ds has got, the lazier i've been with them but i'll be digging out all the gorgeous tiny ones in readiness for the next one.

Definately carrying this one different - all out front. Football scenario describes it perfectly!

With the girls I ballooned - was massive all round so never really had a decent "bump"

Am quite proud of my bump this time, but on the other hand its heavy and im tired!

Not sure if I am carrying differently this time. Altho, everyone I see on the street has such a nice little tidy bump, i still just look incredibly fat with the odd occasion where I actually look pregnant... i did certainly have an obvious bump last time, but perhaps it is because i started off heavier this time around.

afternoon all. are we doing a boy/girl/wait-and-see list after all? we had our scan on friday (decided not to find out flavour) - so relieved everything okay. baby gave us the thumbs up then stuck its tongue out which was well cute. radiographer was saying that the quality of scanning equipment varied hugely all over the country - for some reason our area (east yorkshire) has got really good equipment, which is perhaps why we could see that baby appears to have ENORMOUS ear-lobes, that actually seemed to be flapping around in the waters. looks like we're having a buddha!
anyway, friday night babski was awake and booting me nearly all night, and has kept up a regular tap-dance since then- it's well wierd seeing my tummy moving around: keep thinking a hand is going to burst out of my belly button!

On a different note, I've been getting really worried about pre-eclampsia - my mum had it with increasing severity with me and then my brother, and i think there's a genetic link (not sure though - four pregnancy book = four different answers ). The reason i'm worrying is that after our scan we went to look round the local midwife-led birth unit. It was lovely- peaceful, safe, quiet- not like a hospital at all. But, but, but, they only let you go there if you're low-risk - fair enough, i understand why, but (and even i can see that this is a bit loopy) now i'm really worrying that i'm going to get pre-eclampsia too, and will have to go to the obstetric unit in hull, which I've been told you can't even go and look round (for 'security' reasons) beforehand. I was wondering if anybody had had experience of having pre-eclampsia - what kind of birth are you 'allowed' to have? is there anything I can do to prevent it (stop worrying, i guess!)?

Dundee, what a lovely scan! Think we are doing a list of boys/girls/surprises - just be interesting to know what the divide is! They do say more boys are conceived than girls, something to do with being more likely to mc a boy (due to the different hormones I think) so that is why the birthrate of boys is slightly higher in general than that of girls.
Skidaddle, I had to do gradual withdrawal with DS2 when he went into his own room, I started off having to sit right next to his cot and each night got a little further away until I sat outside his door (used to sit and sew or read so he knew I was there but that it was not play/talk time for him). It took a couple of months or so until I could be out of his sight and a couple more before I could go downstairs (they creak) but it was well worth it. Broke my heart to start with though when he would cry.
People do say that out front is a boy and all round is a girl! I am fairly sure I am carrying another boy, the shape is just the same (although as I said, my Mum carried me and my brothers all out front too so maybe thats just hereditory).

hello ladies
gosh ive missed so much missed chatting to you all as well

sorry not been on but kids running wild since they broke up and been on a few day trips so not gettng in till late, plus dp has all of august off so he hogs the computer, day night, so dont get to chat to you lovely ladies

nice to here what youve been up to, it took some reading, and hope those who have had some sad news, here brighter things soon ((hugs))

im feeling regular movements now at certain times, although was woried when i didnt feel him move at all on saturday(especially as i had a fall on the bus earlier in the day and fell right on my bump, it really hurt) felt a bit bad as i hadnt told dp, until later as he was at a friends when i text to say i was startinget worried and what happened he ran all theway home gave bump a squzze and told him to wake up, low and behold he was booting after half an hour and we both had the biggges smiles on our faces, although dp says he cant feel anything and i keep explaing that theres much more flab in the way this time being as im about 4 stone heavier this time, on a better note though i have only put on about 5lbs since i found out i was pregnant.

anyway i promise to keep up with the thread more regularly.

skiddale, motheofz - we did the baby whisperer pick up/put down method for teaching ds to self settle, she also talks loads about have a really strong bedtime routine and once they are in room no going back out to play. what was nice about pick up/put down was ds knew we were there, when he got upset we'd pick him up till he calmed down then put him back in cot, took it in shifts with dh and got to stage of stroking his back, then his hand and then eventually the slow withdrawal closer and closer out of room - we have to do it if we do on hols as routine goes out of window but most nights he's 7pm on the dot asleep which is fab, he don't half have some stamina now tho...

dundee - my cousin had pre elampsia that got worse with each of her pg (had 3 ds's) each time she was induced early to avoid emergency proceedures and complications so couldn't avoid hospital birth, was very extreme tho not saying that will happen to you at all - hope some one with more experience can help, sometimes the anicdotal stuff isn't very helpful! on plus note - neither her mum or sisters (has 2) had pre eclampsia so dodn't know where that leaves you on genetic front - hows BP been so far?

Def feel like I'm carrying different with this baby - but couldn't that just be due to my stomach muscles giving up? I had a bump way way earlier than last time

buzzybee glad to hear mw app went well, did you have blood triple test at 16-17 wks?

mixedmama hurray at kick! and not sure about work - was def ready to come back last time for my own sainity but not sure the childcare costs will make it worth it this time... def taking a full year off again tho

I am going to take 9 months off for definite then look for something locally, rather than in Central and think I will try to start part time and see how it goes.

Hey Peanutbutter yes I read Secret History first, but loved Little Friend more. Felt really lost when i'd finished it, i stayed up far too late reading that book! I know what you mean about the ending though. I wanted her to make friends with Danny the trailer trash and some good come out of it. I really really hope there is some sort of sequel.
Since reading this book though I've calmed down a lot about how a lot of people in society behave, here and in other countries. makes me feel better that some humans have always been vile. There's a biography of London by a guy called Peter Ackroyd - I'd reccommend it to everyone - altho it's written to be read as you would a story you can dip in and out and just read an odd chapter whenever you want.
Anyway, i'm totally rambling, but yeah books. Love 'em!
I'm reading Annie Proulx at the mo - lots of American hardship etc etc. Altho fiction, she really does her research so bases her stories around exactly what was happening at that time and my god, life at the turn of the last century sounded so hard! Here and in the New World.
This week I am mostly deciding how to have my hair cut. Feel like a small change, nothing drastic...the hair magazines are full of mainly impossible styles so they're not much help.
On the topic of BUMPS well mine is quite neat, like a giant pudding coming out of my tummy. But am confused does this mean boy or girl? I'll find out this Friday hopefully at the scan....wahey!

I will say it again - just ignore me.

So of all of you having scans this week but good luck to you all. Roll on 7 Sept!!

Just wanted to confirm that I am ignoring you MixedMama.

(Psssst! Why am I supposed to be ignoring you?)

What can you say or type to someone who has lost her son. I am lick you I don't think I could carry on living - but Isuppose you do because you have no choice! People have the most awful experinces - I think of several people on MN that have lost loved ones and everytime I find it amazing that they seem to coping so well.

Her son was born with problems no-ones is sure why. And his heart simply stopped. Awful.

Anway to change to topic to potty tainning...my advice (for what is worth) is to leave it as long as possible. It is much easier if they are ready for it. Both times dds have cracked in a about 3 days. For the 1st couple of days go comando...wear nothing - no pants etc and keep reminding them. Do not go out the house. Then when they are sorted no pants only then go for the pants. I think the feeling of having something round their bits is so similar to a nappy and they forget (ohh another reason for real nappies - supposed to be easier to potty train as they feel wet as opposed to dispossibles which don't).

Buzzybee - yes I get a back to take home and wash (they have rinsed them etc).

Was just wondering why we needed to ignore you too Mixedmama??? [confused face]

neuro - because everytime someone has a scan or an impending scan i moan that mine is so far away.

cazzy - i honestly dont know. sorry and here if you need to talk. god, i just dont know. it is just so awful

Ahhh, yours will soon be here Mixedmama, I felt very of people having their 20 week scans too, it comes from being due at the back end of the month!

I saw your friend's post on the active threads board Cazzy, her son was a beautiful boy, how heartbreaking. I think all you can do when someone suffers a loss like that is offer to listen as nothing you say can make it better