June 2019 - Part 8

[coastergirl]

I couldn't see a new thread so started one, hope that's OK.

Massive congratulations @swiftfox. So exciting to have our first baby!

Oh god yes the after pains, didnt get them with DS1 but had them for 4days with DS2 they have stopped now.
Sore nips is defo normal, its the initial latch (i normally count to ten) and then its ok. Lots of lansinoh after every feed.

The afterpains I had with DS2 led me to dog whistle a midwife on the ward as I was so trapped with pain the bell was just out of reach.

I had none with DD1: second time round I could have drink Oramorph like pop.

@PaulHollywoodsSexGut that is hilarious!!

I spoke to the midwife this morning about my pains - actually she's a midwifery support person - and she suggested i go to the GP as it's sort of muscular and seems more in my bits that in my uterus (and nowhere near my stitches). Not sure if I really need to or if she just wasn't qualified to know if it's normal? Seems to be mostly when I really need to pee (during the night) or if I've been walking. She said it sounds almost "prolapse like" which got me a bit 😳

Midwife told me that there is good data to show that hydrogel patches are fantastic for badly damaged nipples. I have some on order from good ol' amazon so I have them should I need them.

I'm having a bit of a breakdown... my 2 week old daughter won't be put down in a cot/ crib / Moses basket at all. DH is back at work and I'm on my own - i haven't slept more than 2 hours all night because little one starts crying as soon as i put her down. The only place she's happy is on me - she's deep asleep, but not even a minute after putting her down she'll cry.
I've rang my MIL and asked her to come round but she's too busy today and I literally have no one else here (my family all live in Germany).
Any ideas how to get her to sleep in a cot even if it's only for an hour or so? Tried womb sounds, a hot water bottle to warm up the surface before putting her down, kept my hand on her etc but nothing worked.
I don't want to fall asleep with her on me as it's meant to be really dangerous, but I really can't stay awake anymore and am absolutely exhausted. Any ideas welcome!!

@Ksjourney I have used them and they are amazing! My nipples were severely damaged and they were completely fine in 2 days

@annihall I had exactly the same problem with DS1. When my partner went back to work I was equally horrified and tried everything. Eventually we realised that he didn't like the noses basket when it was in the stand, he slept for at least a couple of hours when it was on the floor. Eventually he wouldn't sleep in the basket, just waking for his usual feeds, but it did take a while to get him settled first and then to get him into his basket. Just persist, you will get there! I could literally have written your post a year and a half ago, but it does get better! X

Sorry, I meant 'eventually he WOULD sleep in his basket!!'

Hi @annihall we are pretty much in the same boat, 16 days in. Is there a time when she will go in? My daughter is better at being put down in the morning, still only for an hour or so but it’s something. My boyfriend and I are doing shifts of holding her overnight but obviously that’s not ideal... we have tried for the last couple of nights rocking her (for absolutely flipping ages, very tedious) before trying to put her down, this has (occasionally) led to 2 hour spells in the cot. It’s brutal but it will get better. I think it’s just perseverance really, but it is so hard.

@Kimbishop86 thank you I will try putting the basket on the floor. It's just so draining if there's no one around who could take over for at least an hour... I'm hoping it will be the same for us as it was for you and she will be fine with it eventually! X

@hexagon01 DD is 17 days today and up until now we took turns holding her during the night too, but DH is back at work now so needs to get some more sleep so unfortunately mostly up to me now. Let's hope both our girls will soon change their sleeping habits a bit. X

@annihall mine is the same, he’s only 3 days old however his brothers did do exactly the same. I looked into safe cosleeping as it was the only way we could get any sleep. At the moment my little one sleeps on my chest at night and day time naps and when I have to get stuff done I put him in the sling. He wakes the second I put him down. It’s all really normal, they will eventually sleep alone and be happy to be put down

@Napssavelives my girl is very small, less than 6lb at birth and midwives said it's not recommended for small babies to share a bed with parents.
I was considering it anyway as I'm very desperate to get some sleep, do you have any tips on how to make it safer for baby to share a bed/ sleep on my chest?
I've read about it a lot but opinions are very divided

My first was 6lb 2 and I shared a bed with him, only way he would sleep. I keep duvet below my waist, baby sleeps on me with a little blanket over him, I have the pillows that I’m sleeping on and no other pillows in the bed. No alcohol, drugs that can make you sleepy. It’s just me in the bed too so I don’t need to worry about anyone else law rolling on him, when I was with ex when my others were small I used to sleep in the middle of the bed and have baby either on me or at the side of me, that was there was no risk of their dad rolling on them. Never co sleep on sofa.

I know bed sharing generally isn’t recommended but for me I was so exhausted I was falling asleep anyway so figured it was safer to do planned co sleeping rather than unplanned. That way I can make it as safe as possible.

Day 3 midwife appointment today, baby 160g up from birth weight. Yay!

@Napssavelives congratulations on weight gain! That's impressive! We are going very slowly here and DD is still 5% below birth weight at day 14 however we are taking comfort in her having gained consistently at the last two checks. Still a way to go but we hope things are now moving in the right direction.

My nephew wouldn't be put down but he would sleep in his bassinet in the pushchair when out and about. In the end my SIL moved the pushchair upstairs every night and that became his crib.

@2countries1bump Same here. At almost 3 weeks we're still 3oz off birth weight. He's gaining so slowly :(

@allfurcoatnoknickers how are the midwives handling it? Have they given you possible reasons or is it just lots of conflicting advice on what to do next? I have one great midwife who says it is normal but more panicked reactions from others.

@2countries1bump I'm an expat, so no midwife, but the pediatrician told me to see a lactation consultant, who diagnosed a tongue and lip tie, and put me on a feeding-pumping-formula routine.

Unfortunately, neither the lactation consultant, nor the doctor who fixed the tongue and lip tie take insurance. Breastfeeding is free my arse

@allfurcoatnoknickers frustrating about the insurance! We've had tongue tie ruled out so still a bit of a mystery why she isn't gaining more/faster. Supply is good and I'm pumping to build it, she latches and feeds well enough, although sometimes sleepy - I hope it was the antibiotics she got at birth and that it is a temporary effect but who knows. Are you supplementing with formula?

@allfurcoatnoknickers Sorry - Just saw you had mentioned formula. Is it every feed? We are doing 1-2 extra feeds a day with formula.

@2countries1bump I power pump after every feed in the day (not at night) and if I get out less than 60ml of breast milk, then I top up with formula. So if I do 40ml of milk, then I also give him 20ml of formula.

He only started gaining properly when I added formula.

@allfurcoatnoknickers Wow that's incredible! I only manage to pump a couple of times a day but then most of the day DD is taking long feeds with only short breaks in between. You are going to have amazing supply after all your hard work!

@annihall how's it going? Have you managed to get any sleep yet?

@2countries1bump I hope so. It's barely increase so far, but the baby feels a bit chunkier? I'm hoping for a few fat rolls soon...

@Kimbishop86 yes DH came home from work and looked after her while I had a 2 hour nap in the evening... also luckily the next night was so much better and I managed to put her down in the next to me cot for a bit.
It made all the difference during the day - i was still tired but not to the point where I struggled to stay awake so had a much better day. I'm hoping that this was just one really bad night and won't be like that again.