July 2019 Part 4 - Still in the 1st Trimester

[Frazzlerock]

New thread y'all

This is going to be our good luck thread

Googledoc here:
docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1y-XaVbeNQM-bCGlr_UxXxcBBNGUfIVQY_4htZRUpbbw/edit#gid=0

Morning all. 6.20am here and about to leave for work. I am also back to being seriously constipated.....it's been a few days now. Going to have to get the prunes back out of the cupboard (yuck).
I am still really tired but I am veering between finding it really hard to sleep and sleeping all night. Last night it took me ages to get to sleep and on the weekend I barely slept. Then on Sunday night I slept reallyreally well. I suppose there is just too much going in our bodies and minds!

Good luck to people having scans today. Have a god day everyone - hope the sickness stays away. I had a large Pizza Hut pizza last night and have half left over which will go to work with me.........oh dear!

edidxb I'm curious where the other non-UK based among us live! Understand if you don't want to say exactly.

I'm in Malaysia! Planning to have the baby here and expect its first trip back to the UK will be at Christmas.

Morning,

I'll catch up properly later but, as a UK one, it's only 4.55am and I've been up since 3:30 worrying and trying very hard to breath through it,

I'm having terrible flashbacks of our scan with Emily and petrified the same thing will happen today. DP is in a terrible way so I can't even talk to him because right now I've got to try and hold him up - not just scared about scan, he's having a really rough time with his new job and everyday he's met by another obstacle (eg, he lost his bank card last night, cancelled it after a mad search for it, then found it on the bedroom floor)
He's just really depressed right now.

So I've only got you guys to turn to really. Especially at this time in the morning.

I thought I had a handle on this and have been really positive since the news at last week's scan. But I cannot shake this two week discrepancy thing. It just seems so excessive given I know exactly when I ovulated. I'm thinking of all the possibilities such as my retroverted uterus or the positioning of the baby but surely the sonographer would have said those things could have an effect on the view?

I keep telling myself all will be okay and we deserve this good luck after such an awful few years. But there is a louder voice in my head telling me it's going to be bad news.

I've come downstairs as I didn't want to wake DP. I need to try and distract my mind somehow.

This worry isn't helped by symptoms diminishing, such as my boobs feeling completely normal again. I've still got a very dry mouth and have got through a 600ml bottle of water overnight. I just wish I could be given a sign that all is okay. Just a boob twinge would suffice.

I'm rambling now, but I'm so so so scared 😢

Frazzlerock I don't know what to say. I just hope everything is ok for you and your DH .

What time is your scan? Could you listen to some meditation tracks or even just rain/ocean sounds to try and relax a bit?

My scan is at 9:20.
I'm watching Emma Willis which I had recorded from Monday.

I hear/read so many positive stories about large date discrepancies and I'm clinging to that hope. But I can't help thinking about what happened before and it's at exactly the same stage we went in and there was no heartbeat. The only difference being I had a small bleed back then which prompted me to go to the EPU. Back then I thought I was overreacting but I wasn't.

This time I've not bled at all (yet). It's just the measurement thing which baffles me then sends my mind into overdrive.

I just desperately want to get through this scan and get to the other side knowing all is well and I was worrying over nothing. I've been talking to Popsy while I'm lying on the sofa and telling him/her how much we love him/her and that we need him/her to hold on for us.
I honestly don't think we'll get through another loss. We nearly split several times after the last one. I think this will destroy us both

Fuck, I hope i am overreacting this time

I'm taking deep breaths and telling myself
IT WILL BE OKAY!

Oh @Frazzlerock, it's awful isn't it. I don't think it is normal to drink 600ml of water through a night so it has to still be a sign. You saw the heartbeat last time which was also a good sign.
What time is your scan?
I obsessively google all situations which doesn't help, so you need to do something positive for the next few hours to take your mind off it. Read the Daily Mail celeb news, read the Guardian, put things in your basket for Christmas shopping, plan a holiday somewhere. Anything which is not baby related. Watch Gossip Girl on Netflix (my guilty secret).
It doesn't make you feel better at all, but I feel the same for tomorrow. I took my husband with me to my 10 week scan last time and that's where we found the bad news and I want to go alone this time - and I have for all my scans so far. For me it makes it easier.

Good luck for today xx

@kincat, I am in Dubai and like you, will probably be heading back at Christmas next year if everything goes to plan. Or if I get some maternity leave that is decent, I might head back for a week in October time! My parents live in Edinburgh, and my other family is in London/Cornwall/Manchester so it makes visiting home quite difficult!

Yes, you just have to stay as positive as you can I think. It's a good sign you've had no bleeding and also seen a heartbeat.

It's definitely normal for symptoms to come and go. My boobs feel totally normal this afternoon and I'm not wanting to fall asleep at my desk.

@edidxb I'd like to go without DP if I'm perfectly honest. I'd much prefer to take a friend for support as he's not in the right frame of mind to be supportive at all. But it's his baby too and he wants to come.
Good luck for tomorrow, it's such a hard time, especially if you've experienced a MMC before

@KinCat Yeah, I keep reading it's totally normal for symptoms to come and go but right now I need all the symptoms I can get just for peace of mind. Just shit timing for my boobs to be normal again while all this is going on! I just need a twinge or something. I'm 9 weeks though so wondering if the placenta has started to take over a bit. My symptoms usually all go by 10 weeks anyway...

I'm going to finish watching Emma Willis then find something not baby related to watch. I might even turn my laptop on and do some work

Thinking of you today Frazzle

Thinking to you today frazzle.

Lots of love @Frazzlerock , just a couple more hours to wait until you see your healthy little bean.

Good luck Frazzle, keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Good luck today @frazzle and fingers crossed for popsy, I am feeling positive for you!

It’s a good plan to book these things first thing in the day xx

Good luck tomorrow today @Frazzlerock will be thinking of you 💕

Morning all and good luck Frazzlerock for today. I have everything crossed

It's a stinking morning here, wet and windy. Poor DS is at Forest School this morning, not sure it's the best idea as he already has a cold which is disturbing all of our sleep 😴 I guess it's just the time of year, he'll presumably be bunged up now til Easter...

Good luck Frazzle.

Good luck @Frazzlerock

Good luck Frazzlerock xx

Sending you lots of hugs @frazzlerock

Good luck for today @Frazzlerock

I currently binge watching Emma Willis and looking forward to a meal out with the family tonight at a Tapas restaurant ( hoping I can keep it down) 😂xx

Urgh DH has hung his wet towel over my work uniform after his shower this morning. My shirt smells like a wet dog. Is that reasonable grounds for divorce? I am so tired and emotional it's either that, or he too is going to end up under the patio...

God luck frazzle got everything crossed for you 💞💞

Yep that's totally reasonable grounds.

I'm on the train fighting the urge to vomit and the woman next to me has just sprayed something that is making me gag. And she had the audacity to flinch when I coughed.

Good luck @frazzle, everything crossed for you !