The March-ers 2019 - #7

[Angelmiracle]

Welcome to no.7 mamas 😄

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Thread 6

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/3379197-The-March-ers-2019-6

With regards to change bags, a rucksack all the way! Pods inside if you want but definitely so much easier to throw on your back when they get bigger but still able to go on the pram.
With @wineandchoccy on boys names - DS has two tank engine type names

@firsttimemumjess1 I had the matching bag to the pram last time loved the pram Silver cross pioneer but the bag was awful. I have bought a non branded bag with loads of pockets from a baby sale this time.
Dd is 3 1/2 and I still use a rucksack at the weekends with snacks and toys in and that is probably what I will end up using more.

Thanks for the advice @SquirtlesMumAgain and @Wineandchoccy I was leaning more towards a rucksack as they seem more practical. Just so many to choose from

@jenfur we liked Nathaniel, George and Austin but we are having a girl!

Thanks everyone. @Wineandchoccy DH has a tank engine name and apparently as a kid, he loved the show but didn't like that engine because it had stolen his name haha. He likes the name Thomas after his granddad but I'm not sure, although I'm happy with it for a middle name. I asked DS if he liked the name Thomas and he said "like on the telly" lol.
@rachieachie I like Dylan but DH not so keen.
@Gronk27 we have a cousin with a George and I liked Nathan for DS but he became Ethan so not something that would work together.
We named DS after a real fluke where both DH and I heard the name at work the same day and text each other about it so I'm hoping there might be some fates working for us again this time.

We had our 20 week scan recently too... we decided at the last minute to find out what we ere having as we decided the main reason not to find out was emotional/sentimental which isn't us. I was genuinely so disappointed and cried when I got home on the phone to my mum. Husband was also disappointed, we were both like "oh" when she told us which I don't think was the desired reaction. But we think/hope that we would have had this reaction either way and it's also just the fact that it made it more real and I've had an "easy" pregnancy thus far so we haven't had to change anything in our lives... whereas now this thing growing inside me feels more real, and isn't just a spreadsheet to get completed. We haven't decided if we will tell people hence not mentioning what we are having here either. Does this make us sound bad parents??? :( As rationally we know that it won't matter either way, so I don't know why we were so disappointed as it's not like we'd convinced ourselves it was one sex beforehand.

The scan was all good though. Baby was moving a lot (and not playing ball... kept covering it's face with it's hands and curling up into a ball every time she wanted to check something) whereas we think it was sleeping at the 12 week scan.

For those who have been beyond the 20 week stage before... when did you get your Mat B1 form? My work have asked me for it asap given my "unique" maternity/sick leave combo. We're having a restructure so our local HR won't exist soon meaning the people who know my lengthy back story want to get it all logged asap before they move so I don't have to explain my life again to someone new.

On the changing bag front, we're also going for a rucksack. Seems far more practical than the shoulder ones, and husband would be happier to be seen with it!

@cardboard33 the whole reason we found out the gender was because we were so convinced we were having a boy that I knew we'd be devastated if it was a girl. Not because we'd love them any less but it would just be a huge shock to the system. Don't beat yourself up over your reaction, whatever you've been told it's just your mind getting used to the idea of something which understandably hasn't felt very real before this pint.

In terms of the mat B - I'm fairly certain it's your 25 week midwife appointment. My manager is a week ahead of me (she's now 23 weeks) and already has hers but I think that's only because she's had an extra appointment for them to check everything is growing okay because it was a bit slow to grow at first

@cardboard33 Perhaps the disappointment is just because you've closed the door to a lot of your imagined possibilities. That's how I felt - we wanted a boy, but a part of me still had to grieve for all the "girly" things I would miss out on.

& I got my MAB1 form at my most recent midwife appointment, just ask for it if she doesn't offer.

@cardboard33 your midwife will arrange your matb1 form if you are not having an appointment for a while give them a call if your appointment is soon you may have to remind them about it.

@whatalearningcurve & @littlekitty1985 - thank you. I feel so stupid, mainly because we'd both convinced each other that we didn't care about the sex when maybe we should have been more honest with ourselves. I thought I was very self aware!

We know that this is also likely to be our first and only child, so part of me knew that I'd be disappointed regardless of what the outcome was because now there's less chance of having the other sex, but that's also stupid because there was only ever one baby. But then I think it's good that we did find out given how I've apparently reacted... and it means we can get on with the practical aspect of finalising the name. Although our best friends are due 2 weeks before us and also having the same sex so we will still need a back up name. I'll get over it.

My next appointments are at 24 weeks (got 3 in one day) so hopefully I'll get it then. Do you think I should chase beforehand? As husband also needs to give it to his HR by 25 weeks, but hopefully they will be lenient if we've only received it at 24 weeks and it has to go through the system at both workplaces.

Random slightly off topic question- is watching One Born Every Minute a good or bad idea?! First baby by the way...

@cardboard33 your midwife should do it there and then it’s only a couple of details she adds to a pre printed form then you add your details and national insurance number.
Your employer will need the original copy to keep your DHs employer should accept a copy

@Nightmanagerfan it’s good for a laugh as I’m sure 99% of births are nothing like they show

@wineandchoccy Good to know! Ten mins in and there’s a 16-year-old girl being induced which does make me think if she can do it so can I!

@nightmanagerfan I tried one born every minute and couldn't get on with it at all but really enjoyed The Highland Midwife for a more rounded view of late pregnancy and childbirth. I'm also a fan of period dramas and loved Call the Midwife but that's personal taste!

@cardboard33 I'm so sorry to hear about your gender disappointment, it's pretty common and there are lots of support groups for it, as you say it's unlikely to linger once baby arrives but do try and work through your feelings on it.

@Nightmanagerfan I was glued to it but then when I fell pregnant with DC1 I couldn't and haven't watched it since 😂

@cardboard33 I'm sorry you're feeling deflated. You are probably totally spot on in saying that you both would have had the same reaction to it being the opposite sex. I have decided not to find out this time as I'm swaying for a girl as we have DS and DH only announced at the weekend to someone he'd also love a girl this time. If I was told this is a boy at 20 week scan I'd be deflated a bit and obvs DH too. But I think at the birth I wouldn't be deflated or disappointed.

My cousin was over home with her 9 week DS2 for his christening. We kept him overnight with his big brother. I fell totally in love with him!! As did DS. We hated them leaving to go home. He also reminded me that whilst I'm not in love with being pregnant right now- the end goal is having a beautiful baby at the end all being well. So I feel reassured either sex - we will love our child to bits!

I'd say this time next week or so you'll have adjusted to the idea and soon be excited.

Sorry, I still haven't caught up on this thread or the previous one yet. I'm still on honeymoon, fly back tomorrow 😭. But I have finally felt the baby move! There's been a few times where I've had a tiny bit of pressure in one part of my abdomen and then it goes which I'm still not sure if it was baby changing position. This morning was unmistakeable. About 6-8 kicks all in quick succession. Felt like tiny flicks. I'm actually really relieved as I was starting to worry that I hadn't felt it!

Hope you’ve had a lovely honeymoon @Assumeitwassomethingclever - so lovely that you’re feeling movements!

My DD felt the baby from the outside for the first time this morning and her face was a picture 😍

@thefirsttimer- EDD 23/02/19 - first baby - Boy
@Wineandchoccy- EDD 24/02/19 - 2nd baby - dd is 3
@olivia2019 - EDD 25/02/19 First Baby
@Frenchgal - EDD 25/02/19 - first baby -Boy
@Sjohn81 - EDD 25/02/19
@pushit - EDD 25/02/19 - DD(2yrs9m)- baby twins
@squashbanana1- EDD 26/02/19- first baby
@orangekitkat13 - EDD 27/02/19 - first baby - Boy
@Velcro88 - EDD 27/02/19 - first baby
@hamandpease - EDD 01/03/19 - first baby
@Shampooeeee- EDD 01/03/19- 1 DS (2yo)
@Purpleflower1983 - EDD 01/03/19 - baby girl
@TurquoiseWeekend - EDD 01/03/19
@puravida31- EDD 01/03/19 - first baby
@PartridgeJoan- EDD 01/03/19- first baby
@SDP84- EDD 01/03/19 - DD (8yo)
@LittleKitty1985- EDD 01/03/19 - first baby - team blue
@Sophlou- EDD 01/03/19 - 2 DC
@Priscilla83 - EDD 01/03/19 - first baby
@toastfiend- EDD 02/03/19 - first baby
@wordsmithereens- EDD 02/03/19 - first baby - Girl
@Barleyfive -EDD 2/03/19
@Hermagsjesty - EDD 02/03/19 - 2 DC (7&5)
@ladycarlotta- EDD 03/03/19 - first baby - Girl
@MoosterTheMoose- EDD 03/03/19 - DD (4yo)- baby girl
@ClaireMcd13- EDD 03/03/19 - DD (4yo)
@Murphyrocks- EDD 03/03/19 - 1 DS (2yo)- Boy
@MistakenHoliday- EDD 03/03/19 - one DD (3yo) - Girl
@NotDoingThat- EDD 03/03/19 - first baby
@rainbownugget28- EDD 03/03/19 - first baby
@MrsSax- EDD 03/03/19 - 1 DS - Boy
@XxsimonexX- EDD 04/03/19 - baby boy
@babycatcher411- EDD 04/03/19 - 1DC
@Mamawithnumber2 - EDD 05/03/19
@sunnywithachanceofpanic- EDD 05/03/19
@TheWanderlust - EDD 06/03/19 - first baby - Girl
@Buttons2 - EDD 06/03/19 - 1 DC
@MrsLCW -EDD 07/03/19 (will be induced around 14/03/19)
@chamcourts - EDD 08/03/19
@starheart- EDD 08/03/19
@7415N1d0r1391117- EDD 08/03/19- 2 DS - Boy
@sarahandduckarehigh - EDD 09/03/19 - 1DS (almost 2)
@Marmite2018 - EDD 11/3/19 first baby 🍼
@lemonsorbetinthesun- EDD 11/03/19
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@Smilenow2008 -EDD 12/03/19
@Hans123 - EDD 13/03/19
@Gronk27- EDD 13/03/19 - First Baby- Girl
@HelloPeopl3- EDD 13/03/19 - first baby-Girl
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@Agnie- EDD 14/03/19
@ballanj - EDD 14/03/19 - first baby - Boy
@Welshgal18 -EDD 14/03/19
@melissa112 -EDD 14/03/19 - Boy
@MisBit1 - EDD 15/03/19 - 1DS will be 3yo
@HidCat -EDD 15/03/2019 - 1DS (5yo)
@Jenlou1992- EDD 15/03/19 - first baby
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@Spud2019 - EDD 16/03/19
@cactusplant- EDD 17/03/19 - 2 DC
@Angel0071987 -EDD 18/3/19
@bluebelltulip- EDD 19/03/19 - 1 DD 18 months
@HoldOnToHope - EDD 19/03/19
@Kee80 - EDD 19/03/19- 1DS - Girl
@modgem - EDD 19/03/19 - first baby
@rachieachie- EDD 19/03/19 - Boy
@Orville82 - EDD 20/03/19 - 1 DS (3yo)
@ALRM - EDD 20/03/19 - first baby
@RMack22 - EDD 20/03/19 - first baby
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@Charlotte1x -EDD 22/03/19
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@TheOneWithTheBaby- EDD 23/03/19 - first baby
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@Jenfur- EDD 23/03/19 - DS (2yo)- Boy
@MyMumDimensionJumps- EDD 23/03/19- 1 DC
@fanks- EDD 24/03/19 - 4 DC
@Jadeelx- EDD 24/03/19 - 1 DS 8 months
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@firsttimemumjess1 - EDD 25/03/19- first baby
@AssumeItWasSomethingClever - EDD 26/03/19 - first baby
@sherbertdibdab -EDD 27/03/19 - 1 DD 21 months
@cardboard33 - EDD 27/03/19 - first baby
@Hurradieweltgehtunter- EDD 27/03/19- baby twins
@nightmanagerfan - EDD 27/03/19 - first baby
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@hanny24 - EDD TBC
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@Hermagsjesty that is lovely! I can't wait until DS can feel baby

Just checking in

I think I've started feeling the baby kick which I wasn't expecting at 19 weeks with an anterior placenta. It's very low down, it feels like it's dancing on my cervix sometimes!

So I've been officially told that the company I work for is closing and offered redundancy. I was told a week or so ago unofficially that they would keep me on until about the end of Feb, ideal for my maternity leave to then begin, and I would be able to claim SMP. Yesterday they told me that they have had to rethink and have offered redundancy at the end of November with 4 weeks pay in lieu of notice. So my employment ends before my qualifying week and instead I would have to claim maternity allowance. Its not ideal but as long as there's no issue with the allowance, it's not the worst thing to be able to put my feet up (ha) until the baby arrives.

Just feels so quick now that I won't have a job in three weeks and then nothing when my maternity allowance ends.

That is an awfully quick turn around for you. Give HMRC a call and just check all will be in order for your maternity allowance and what you have to do differently (I still need to do that myself as I'm in an odd situation too)
Hope it all works out and you can have a lovely rest and get yourself ready.

So this morning I shaved my bikini area for the first time in a couple of weeks (yes I know, bad wifey) and it was legitimately difficult to see what I was doing! Felt like a pregnancy milestone for sure!

I made a long baby shopping list yesterday. I'm happy to get quite a few things second hand from gumtree etc. Do you think it's cheapest to buy the rest on amazon? Or are there certain things that are better to buy on the high street?