Pregnancy after loss: spring 2019 edition (The Brexit Babes) 🐧

[PassTheAfterEights]

Extra supportive pregnancy journey thread for grads of the penguin huddle and anyone due spring 2019 after a long and bumpy road.

All welcome 🐧

Thread commandments:

Thou shalt share and not apologise for any neurosis or worry

Thou shalt shuffle immediately to the centre of the huddle when feeling vulnerable or hopeless

Thou shalt share all photographs and good news and celebrate raucously that of others

Thou shalt not apologise for TMI, or pearl-clutchy words and language

Thou shalt add your handle, age, number of DC and EDD when joining the thread to roll call so we know where everyone is (thanks!)

May our beans snuggle down, heads stay steady & the elastic on our waistbands quickly snap x

@lolacola13 my symptoms have been very back and forth - far more prominent a few weeks ago than now, only the occasional wave of backache. Nausea has been the worst the last few days. So don't worry about that, essentially - when mine disappeared I called up local preg support team and they offered me an early scan; have had them at 5+6 and 7+1 and saw heartbeat both times - from that perspective, very reassuring, so don't let that hold you back! the only downside could be making it harder to face bad news once you have seen a heartbeat - I'm not sorry we did, but it's a personal choice!

Hey everyone 👋🏼
@lolacola13 I agree with @PassTheAfterEights, there should be plenty to see at 7+5 and I would find it reassuring to know everything’s ok before I go on holiday.

So, I got a scan at EPU today. Measuring 6+3 and the heart was flickering away. Past few days I have been feeling sick constantly, all day, all night, when I’m hungry then when I eat!!... So I’ve promised my OH I’ll hold off on any further scans unless this sicky feeling disappears!

How’s everyone else doing!???? xx

@maydot YAY - so delighted for you x must have been a great homecoming from hols!!!! Also must rescind the abstinence comment; saw midwife for booking in today (eek) and she said other than weeks 6-12 even a small glass of wine with dinner daily is absolutely fine 😱 obviously not keen to play fast and loose but so nice to know I can have a sip of the good stuff every so often if my taste for it returns!!! Had no idea. Apparently tonnes of research into it and the NHS party line is just to prevent people going OTT with some measure of allowance 🤷

Anyway hope all continues well for you now, metaphorical cheers to that 🥂

Hello everyone, so I'm 6 weeks exactly today and still feeling anxious, not sure it's going to go away until I get to the end of first trimester though so going to have to just try to be patient and roll with it I think! Starting to feel really exhausted now, still have some nausea but not too bad. I think I've been making sure to eat more which is helping to keep it at bay. Have a week of solo childcare coming up though which I'm really not used to - I work full-time but nursery is shut for a week just when DH has to go away on a work trip! Ah well, we'll get through it somehow. He's heading off tomorrow so trying to make the most of today.

Lovely to see such great scans and that things are going well - I'm now wavering over having one! Maybe at 10weeks I'll consider it. And I'd agree on the alcohol points @passtheaftereights - first trimester is the worst time to have any really, I think close to abstinence is the best option. I really regret how much caffeine I drank before my MC, I still worry it was that which caused it, even though I know it's unlikely. Don't want to feel that way again so I'm sticking to very little caffeine (just what's in chocolate and the very occasional coke when I've just been crashing out at work but need to carry on, caffeine free on coffee and tea) and no booze at all. At least this way I'll know I did my best!

Some excitement today - my NHS trust is terrible for always being the latest appointment dates possible, but this time I've got booking in on Sunday this week when I'll be 7w1! So that's exciting. Going to have a chat to her about how anxious I'm feeling, not sure there's anything she can do but it might help. She's the same midwife from my pregnancy with DS and is very old school, no nonsense, which is generally my preferred type of medical professional! Has anyone else got booking in sorted? And how's everyone doing? Still exhausted here, though also struggling to sleep through the night - can't get comfy!

Yay!!... That’s so so exciting. I’ve got my booking apt on the 7th Sept, I’ll be about 10 weeks by then!
I’m feeling ok, getting up once or twice in the night for the loo, got terrible indigestion and heart burn and a bit tired but doing ok!.... Trying not to think about things too much, got a long road ahead!

@Jessabean How are you getting on? xx

Hi can I join? Is this thread in the same category as the staying prosifrickentive after miscarriage thread? I found it very useful last time.

I had two miscarriages followed by the birth of my son who is now 17 months. We have been trying since my last period and although AF not due for a few days yet, (I'm cd25 today and unsure when I ovulated) it appears I may be expecting. Super scared and feel I may have a UTI so will be on the phone to GP first thing. My first two pregnancies were thought to have ended due to infections so in my successful pregnancy I was prescribed prophylactic antibiotics. I actually spoke to a GP 3 weeks ago and explained we wanted to ttc and she assured me she would write to the obstetrics team to find out if I should have prophylactic antibiotics in my next pregnancy. I assume she hasn't had a response yet but I will phone tomorrow and try and get some antibiotics to get rid of this infection anyway.

@purplefushia well done for getting to six weeks and managing the anxiety, not easy. Glad you're feeling OK physically and super glad you have a scan on Sunday! That should help a little. I'm on one cup of tea a morning (JUST enough), bit of chocolate and no booze - she was pretty clear it's a huge no til week 13 - however I couldn't feel less like it! Feels funny to have loved wine so much (SO MUCH) and nearly a month without now, haven't noticed. I reckon it'll be Christmas at this rate!

Booked in on Friday, was a little nervous heading in but midwife was fantastic & feel so reassured. Just a brilliant advisor and advocate equally really, took a lot of fear away from all the decisions that have to be made. Still hideously nauseous and fairly low energy but boobs are behaving and sleeping late but well. Also wondered how @Jessabean is? Hope all is ok lovely x

Welcome & congratulations @dovegrey18 yes absolutely, great to have you here after a horrible time for you, fx you get the antibiotics quickly and this turns into concrete good news!!

@lolacola13 and @MisBit1 how are you doing? x

Hey guys just querying if anyone knows anything about hcg levels . Mine was 10,985 at 5wks and 4/5 days.... is this a bit high? Could my dates be wrong? Or dare I say it more than one in there 🙈

Thank @passtheaftereights - only booking in on Sunday though not a scan - though I don't think having one now would make me feel better as it would still be before my MMC dates (started bleeding at 11 weeks, embryo measured 8.5 on scan). But from what you've said about yours booking in may well make me feel better - I think I need to talk to someone about it all really. DH is lovely but is a bit too inclined towards saying if it happens we'll just try again, which isn't always what I want to hear! He also says to put it out of my mind but that's basically impossible for women I think, fine for men!

I'm seeing my mum tomorrow and I'm definitely going to tell her - don't care about jinxing it or anything, I'll need her support if the worst happens anyway! It will be nice to see her. She had a MMC after me (discovered at the scan, then they quit trying for a third) so she'll understand some of what I'm going through.

Welcome @dovegray18! I don't know the thread you mean, but hopefully we are in similar spirit - despite my anxious posts recently hopefully we are all trying to stay positive! No idea of normal HCG levels @lolacola13 as have never had them measured - I think it depends on your starting value though right, which can vary a lot, the HCG then doubles every 48 hours from conception - so yours may just be naturally high? Did the doctor say anything? High is probably better than low, overall though!

Hope everyone else is doing ok!

Hi everyone, I’ve just got a positive and due at the very end of April or early May. So far I am doing quite well at not worrying.

Hey everyone! 👋

Im ok thanks @Maydot & @PassTheAfterEights. Sorry for going silent over the last couple of weeks. Has been a bit mental trying to catch up with work since coming back off my holiday. Am 7weeks +2 today I think. Just wishing the weeks away at the mo- think these next few weeks are going the most trying (first mc was 7-8 weeks when pregnancy stopped 6 weeks & second was mmc at 12 weeks scan stopping at 9.5 weeks). Had a bit of a wobble last week as started off feeling really nauseous for a couple of days & then seemed to disappear though symptoms have since come back though not quite as strong. Saying that they are particularly worse this week as have been working night shifts!
Been wavering over whether to have an early scan or not to get me through the next few weeks even though I know it won't really give me reassurance until near 12 week scan time anyway really! 🙈
Got booking in appointment with midwife this pm so will at least then be registered so if all does go wrong at least I can then get referred for testing. Just so don't want to lose this one though!
Sorry for the lack of positivity at the mo. Is just so hard when it's all gone wrong before isn't it not to wobble!

How is everyone else getting on though?
@dovegrey18 welcome I think I remember seeing that thread from before - sounds definitely like a likeminded group! I hope you get your infection cleared and things go well for you over the next few weeks- definitely a good line!
@lolacola13 I think that's within the normal levels- they can vary quite widely even with singletons I think. Saw this online which gives roughly normal ranges & as purplefuscia said higher is better!

Hoping the weeks fly by for us all and we can get to that healthy dating scan!

@Jessabean yeh I seen the Range is quite wide!! I'm feeling similar to u grand one day and embracing symptoms the next feeling nothing. It's a very worrying time think I'm getting an early scan end of next week when I'm about to turn 8 weeks. I'd like to think with my hcg so high something will be visible and let's hope that something has a heartbeat to reassure me . I don't think I'll relax even slightly until 3/4 months xoxoxoxox hang in there hun

Pregnancy is so worrying. I’m going to wait until I get a 3+ on a ClearBlue and then ask for a scan at 7 weeks at my hospital’s early pregnancy unit. Hopefully that will be this weekend and I’ll also arrange an appointment with the midwife.

Thanks for the welcome ladies. A very worrying time indeed I'm trying to stay level headed and just take it one day at a time. I've told some close friends but that's all. I'm very close to my mum and want to tell her but I don't want to deal with her excitement if that makes sense. So I think I'll just leave it for now.

I got antibiotics for the UTI and I'm being referred to obstetrics due to medical history. I was under them in my successful pregnancy and I hope the appts etc break up the first 12 weeks as it seems like such a long slog!

Symptoms wise I'm feeling sick and there's a lot of Cm. I'm only cd27 so it's very early. My periods are usually around cd30.

Lovely to hear from you @Jessabean!
I’m feeling the same as the rest of you, very up and down, definite symptoms one minute then not so sure the next!!
It’s so worrying and I’m still trying hard not to really think about this pregnancy too much and not get carried away but then I feel guilty for not getting as excited as I was the last time! I had a proper melt down the other night and cried to my OH that I thought I wouldn’t love this baby as much as the last pregnancy because I’m not getting excited!.... Sounds so silly now

Is anyone else as early as me? My last period was on the 27 July and I got my positive on 20th.

Hi everyone! I'd like to join in as I could use some positivity right now. I'm having a bit of a wobble and finding it very difficult to cope. I had a miscarriage just last month, and conceived straight away. I'm still very early, 4+3 today.

I (stupidly) tested last night, and again this morning with ICs, and my test was lighter today. My pee wasn't diluted at all. I know it could mean 1001 things, and could be nothing - but I can't stop thinking about it and now I'm panicking. I had terrible cramps two nights ago (only lasted about 10mins), but I've been worried ever since. Booked an early scan for 7+2 it feels like a loooooong wait until then!

I'm so annoyed with myself because I tested again to give me a bit of reassurance, but it's done the complete opposite :(

Welcome @dovegrey18 @SurfingOwl and @Lularose! Congratulations to you all on your BFPs!

@PassTheAfterEights thanks for asking after me. I’ve been trying to just get on and not think about things too much. I keep telling myself I’m not having symptoms despite the fact I have round ligament pain, constipation, am knackered and if you took me to an all you can eat buffet right now i’d finish it!

Had booking in two weeks ago but still no 12 week scan appointment yet. I’ve had other appointments come through for diabetic clinic (previous gestestional diabetes means no GTT for me I just get treated as though I have it again regardless.) and for the consultant (I think I ticked nearly all the boxes for that one.) I’m 10+6 today so if it doesn’t arrive soon I’m going to have to chase it. I don’t really want to take time off in the first week back at school I know they have to allow it but I don’t think it’s fair on the little ones to be without their teacher in the first week. I’m already having to rearrange the diabetes appt as it’s the very first day back and we have training, not that I’ve been able to get through to anyone apparently the number on the letter is wrong and the other number I’ve been given rings out. I wish you could organise more of this stuff online.

Good to hear from @Jessabean and @Maydot. It’s reassuring to know others symptoms are up and down and sounds like the not getting too excited is normal. We’ve barely told anyone. My sister knows because she came around the day I found out and I had to see the midwife right away for bloods as I had been exposed to slap cheek and my headteacher knows as I had to avoid school for the same reason until I got my results. Other than that I’ve told one friend who was worried about me when a mutual friend announced her pregnancy and my TA we’ve not told any family or any other close friends.

How was your booking appt @PurpleFushia?

There’s quite a few of us now isn’t there!

Sorry @Lularose I meant to say don’t worry too much about the ICs I did two at the same time using the same sample and one had a clear line the other was a squinter. Can you get a CB and test again tomorrow or Monday if you can wait that long?

@LulaRose the days are going so slow eh? I'm behind you as I'm only 3+6. I tested this morning too and had to give myself a tellin off for getting worked up about the shade of the line!

Just trying to keep myself busy. I'm off work today but I'm doing some household chores to keep distracted

@dovegrey18 I am 4+2 (ish) so really early days for me as well.

How is everyone?

Thanks @SurfingOwl I'm 3+6 today. Here's praying for sticky beans!

Had lots of mild cramping/ pulling sensations today. Sickness is better but boobs are sore

Hello to the new joiners! I've had a busy few days which has been good and a bit distracting at least - went to my friend with new baby, somewhat randomly she was the first person I told - she looked after my DS while DH and I went to the EPU during my MC in may, and I saw her a couple of weeks ago and couldn't hide it - she knows it's early days but it was nice to be able to talk about it openly. Her baby is super sweet too. Then DS and I went to see my mum and told her too, she was pleased of course but understands why I'm a bit cautious. So that was all nice! Back home now, and DH comes back from his work trip on Saturday which will be great! Booking in is on Sunday so that will be good. Just hoping weight isn't too high, but whatever happens will happen. Still going back and fore on whether I think everything is ok versus thinking I've lost all my symptoms - but sounds like that's normal for this thread! Pretty sure boobs and still sore, occasional cramps/twinges, still pretty tired (but with almost 2 year old I'm always tired generally, I think I'm more tired than normal but hard to tell!). Nausea has been ok recently, just occasional, but eating is helping (hence the weight worries!)

Hope everyone is doing ok - I feel like we all can't wait for this trimester to be over! It will be nice as the first of us get to the 12 week scans - who's first? I'm 6w5 today so pretty sure it's not me.