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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

November 2018 #2

999 replies

BadBadBeans · 19/03/2018 10:44

Ante-natal thread for babies due this November, continued...

Stats spreadsheet is here - add and update yourself as needed!

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10
NoCatsHere · 20/03/2018 15:55

welcome dandy and congrats. i'm not telling mine until after the 12 week scan either one will be 4 in oct and the other 8 in jan...but i couldn't bar to explain why something didn't work out if i had another mc.

dontquit its a horrid worry isn't it. i feel really excited but then get waves of feeling like that is tempting fate, and also like you pushing my luck a bit with a third. however i find it far more exhausting being worried so i;ve decided that i'll try out being excited and see how that goes for now!

dontquit · 20/03/2018 16:25

Hi @potkettleblack I feel just like you. Felt like this with the pregnancy I Mc'd at 7 weeks..like it wasn't going to last so now I feel that way again I'm worried. Was super excited about the 2 pregnancies with my dds and all went well. Part of me thinks it's just because it's number 3 and I'm worried I'm pushing my luck!
Had Gp apt last week and she offered to book me in for early scan but I declined mainly because I work next to scan unit and will def be spotted and don't want Work knowing yet but also because I don't want bad news!! Have this awful feeling I'll get to 12 wk scan and there will be no heartbeat.

dontquit · 20/03/2018 16:27

Sorry guys!! Something up with app on phone and kept saying post failed! Don't know how to delete them all.

TheUbercornMum · 20/03/2018 18:03

Hi all, can I join you all? I'm actually officially due the end of October (pending scan which may move me back) but I went 2 weeks overdue with DC1 (so if I don't have a section I'll be expecting a November due date). I was part of a birth group with DC1 of lovely supportive ladies who eventually decamped to Facebook around 12 weeks after getting to know one another on MN and I'm gutted to find the October group has already decamped into two mahoosive Facebook groups joined with Netmums so whilst I am fine with that, it's too big for me and I was looking forward to a nice sized MN group again Sad, I loved being able to get to know the individuals in my last group and support one another.

No problem if not! Blush

Magpie24 · 20/03/2018 18:33

To those of you have been pregnant before when would be the best time to book a last hurrah holiday before the baby comes? Am thinking end of July when I will be roughly 24 weeks if all goes to plan. Would be a UK trip, maybe to Cornwall or Devon, but I want to be able to make the most of it. Any ideas?

Peanutbutterkitkat · 20/03/2018 18:41

@Magpie24 id say that's the perfect time. You won't be that big at that point, hopefully in the best bit of pregnancy and it's before all the things like blood pressure/aches or general things might crop up.

sarahhh1984 · 20/03/2018 18:52

@Magpie24 When I was pregnant with DD, we went on a week away to Whitby when I was 29/30 weeks. Was a good time as I wasn't quite getting too exhausted at that point, but think the time you're suggesting is even better! I just found I had to have more tea stops than normally would!

Magpie24 · 20/03/2018 19:07

@Peanutbutterkitkat @sarahhh1984 thanks guys! Want to fit in a spa break too but I guess I won't be allowed in jacuzzis, saunas and hot tubs!!

Currently missing my super hot baths as I read to avoid them. Did have a warm-ish one last night though as a treat!

questabellatreetop · 20/03/2018 19:40

Hello!! Please can I join? I got my BFP last week, due 28th November, I'm 32 and have two DS aged 13&4 Smile

questabellatreetop · 20/03/2018 19:42

Is there anyone else who has/will have a five year age gap? I'm upset it's not smaller, just hoping they'll still be close enough in age to play.

confuddledconfudle · 20/03/2018 19:48

Hi @questabellatreetop you have the same due date as me and @TinyPaws

How are you both feeling? I've been having cramps like af is about to come on but I had that with first pregnancy as well. I've also been having headaches. I had terrible headaches last time up until 17 weeks but they didn't start this early. I think these might be due to caffeine decrease Confused

MeredithShepherd · 20/03/2018 19:56

@questabellatreetop My DS will be 4 and 9 months when this one is born. I think he will take a bit of adjustjng as he’s an only child.

I’ve booked an early scan for Saturday afternoon when I’ll be 7+5 so fingers crossed everything is fine and there is only one in there!

toasterstrudle · 20/03/2018 19:59

@questabellatreetop I have two friends with a 5 year age gap and although there have been tough times (as with all age gaps I'm sure!) the older children in each case dote on the baby.

TheUbercornMum · 20/03/2018 19:59

@questabellatreetop my other DC will be 4. I think it's a lovely age gap as they'll be old enough to understand and (hopefully) more independent than if they were younger and no double buggy like some of my friends have had to have, yay! In any case, talking to others with lots of different age gaps it'll be fine as whatever gap you end up having it'll always work, every gap has it's pros and cons!

bangwhistle · 20/03/2018 20:03

Hi everyone. I'm laid low with the most terrible all day nausea so not got much energy to check in but loving the community and was very useful reading people's thoughts re NIPTY tests. I think, presuming all progresses I'll go for the Harmony test after my booking in st the place in Bath I've seen recommended. Seems good value at £425 with a scan. I'm just so nervous about being the wrong side of 35 this time and also not making life harder for my other DCs. Interested in other people's feeling about this.

TheUbercornMum · 20/03/2018 20:06

@bangwhistle I'm going for the Harmony test as my medical friends said if I can afford it then it's worth it (I'm 35 and thus that alone could skew the "chance" rating when they come back on nhs). I'd rather know all the info I can get personally. I've just booked it in.

BadBadBeans · 20/03/2018 20:08

@KW1987 glad to hear you're feeling more positive :)

@NoCatsHere thank you so much for sharing your experiences! I'm so glad you got the chance to have a good natural labour. Though I'm sorry to hear that your DS had difficulties with the birth; that must have been a worrying time for you all. You're absolutely right - any decision is going to be tough to make. It's interesting that you say that the fact that you weren't induced the first time made you a better candidate for VBAC. I was induced initially on the evening of my 12th day overdue, and DS was born 13 days overdue. I suppose if I'd been left than I'd have had to have gone into labour naturally at some point, but I honestly felt at the time that NOTHING was ever going to happen on its own. And when DS was born (by EMCS obviously), we were shown the placenta and the midwife pointed out the places where it had begun to die off (my DH was interested and had asked questions - she didn't just foist that on us!) and explained that this is why they don't like people to go more than 14 days overdue. So... I don't honestly believe that even if I tried for a VBAC I would get one anyway! I certainly wouldn't be induced again either - and that's not to put other people on this thread off, because I know of at least two people who have been induced and then had amazing natural water births! But I don't particularly wish to repeat my first birth experience!

@Potkettleblack2 @dontquit I am also worrying about this pregnancy, but I am not giving any credence to it because I worried about the last one too, and let's face it, I worry about anything given half a chance, so pregnancy is providing me with a particularly rich worry-seam to mine! I don't feel pregnant at the moment either, but nor did I last time. It's early early days. Fingers crossed we will all be fine x

@FruitandNutty It depends on your area, but most midwifery services offer booking in from 8 weeks, which does correspond with 2 missed periods. I hadn't thought about the timing in those terms before though!

@TheUbercornMum yay, come and join in! There are a few of us on here who won't be joining the FB group at all / for a good while yet, and as you can see the thread is lovely and active! I was initially due on the 28th June with my last baby, but joined the July thread - which was good, as I ended up giving birth on the 11th July!

@questabellatreetop It's not exactly what you're asking, but there is a 4.5 year age gap between myself and my younger brother. We played together a lot when we were little. Our interaction tailed off when I became a teenager, and then I left home for university when he was only 13. However, once he turned about 17/18, we became really close again (we even lived together, just us, for about half a year!) and I totally count him now as one of my very best friends. I think (hope!) he feels the same about me.

Well, we told my in-laws (who we live with) tonight. Couldn't keep it in any longer as I was doing my nut about hygiene (people cleaning bird feeders in the kitchen sink with the dish scrubbing brushes, and also filling them up on the kitchen table) and we needed them to understand that there was an extra reason why I am worried about picking up diseases. Not exactly the ideal way to tell people, but they were all very pleased.

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TheUbercornMum · 20/03/2018 20:15

@badbeans thank you!! Smile

wejammin · 20/03/2018 20:16

@Magpie24 we have a 10 night camping trip to Cornwall booked for 1st August (26 weeks), and a 4 night stay in a yurt in Northumbria 27th August (30 weeks). When I was expecting DD we went camping for a week when I was 31 weeks, it was fine except for needing lots more pillows and not being able to help DH with the tent.

@questabellatreetop my youngest will be 4 and my oldest nearly 7. There is 2 1/2 years between my 2 and to be honest, the first year with 2 was a total blur and I was exhausted. They do get along (mostly) now, but I am looking forward to having 2 older children so I can enjoy the baby stage this time.

TheUbercornMum · 20/03/2018 20:16

Sorry that should be @badbadbeans pregnancy seems to have rendered me unable to read and spell!!!!!!

moomoo85 · 20/03/2018 20:19

@questabellatreetop my DC will be near 4.5 when this baby is due, i have similar fears

BadBadBeans · 20/03/2018 20:21

@bangwhistle is that Somerset Early Scans? I went to them (but the Bridgwater one) with my first pregnancy. When you ask for people's feelings about this, do you mean about what you would do if the test was positive for a trisomy? This is one of the things that has been keeping me up at night in the last week. I have a friend with a brother who has a serious learning disability, and things are going to be just so hard and so sad for both of them when their mum dies. My own mum died when I was 19, so I am hugely conscious of my own mortality, and the whole idea of leaving behind a dependent adult worries me enormously. But, to have a condition identified at the end of the first trimester and to then have to decide what to do... It must be so heart-wrenching. And what really scares me is that my DH and I might end up disagreeing about it. I have basically had to tell myself that I will cross that bridge if I come to it, because otherwise I'm not going to sleep for the next six weeks.

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bangwhistle · 20/03/2018 20:33

@BadBadBeans yes, this exactly. I'm very worried about this. Especially as having a third feels like a very selfish thing for us to have done. My two DC are so lovely and great friends, I'd hate for this decision to make their life harder. But them to have to actually make that decision... yeeesh! It's going to be hard. Yes, Somerset is the one. I think I'll book in there although I don't spend £400 lightly I think it makes sense in this case. Not to Self: must stop googling probabilities 🤦‍♀️ what will be, will be, but I'm definitely distancing myself from the pregnancy until I have a better idea of things. Perhaps I'm being too wary. I don't know...

BadBadBeans · 20/03/2018 20:42

@bangwhistle I totally get where you are coming from. The thing is, you don't actually have to make a decision right now... Because there isn't anything to make a decision about. It's most likely that everything will be absolutely fine. I am the right side of 35 (just - I'm 33) but I am a catastrophiser - it's my way of defending myself agains the future, if that makes sense? If I catastrophise, then I'm prepared for what might happen. But I have realised that I can't do it about this because I won't know exactly how I would feel until I was put in that situation for real. So I'm just going to do my best to put the whole thing out of my head. Easier said than done, I know...!

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BadBadBeans · 20/03/2018 20:43

PS I am going to travel back to Somerset Early Scans because they were so good last time. And I think the price is very reasonable.

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