Due in March 2017 - thread #4

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If anyone like me is not fussy about brands aldi have tons of baby stuff. A couple of nice changing bags.

I had my 16 week appointment today (at 15+6) and we heard the baby's heartbeat! Such a lovely sound and a really nice surprise as I wasn't expecting to today. It was a very brief appointment, thankfully, as DD was with me and she's not very well. I was so glad my raincoat still zipped up on our way as it was tipping down. I really need a waterproof maternity coat. Umbrellas are rubbish when you also have a pram to push/ toddler's hand to hold.

Anybody splitting their maternity leave with their OHs?

x

Carol
I'll see how it goes but I'm planning to take about 6-8 months of maternity leave. DH will probably take about a month off after the baby is born (so we'll be off together). As far as shared parental leave goes, he's the higher earner so he wouldn't take much, but we could afford for him to take a few months if he wants to. He's thinking about it. He's also thinking about going down to 4 days a week after I go back to work (we'd both work 4 days until baby starts at school). I think long term that would probably be better than him taking leave, as they would get more time together overall.

Name I'm the higher earner but not by much. I think we are going to go down to 4 days each after I finish Mat leave but we need to work out the figures vs childcare costs/time with beany. OH brought it up the other night coz I worked out my Mat lave/holidays with my manager. Just got me thinking, obviously I don't know how I will feel in a year.

Carol
If you earn similar amounts I think that's a good argument to split parental leave reasonably equally, although I guess it also depends whether your employer offers enhanced maternity pay? In which case that would probably tip the balance in favour of you taking more leave. Have you decided how much leave you'd like to take yourself, or does it depend on your partner? (Will you both want to take it?)

I have worked out with my manager to take 6 weeks half days holidays so will only work mornings but will still get full pay, leaving it as late as possible to take MAT leave so when ever that starts will take 39 weeks then do half days again when I go back to use the rest of my holidays up. I think I definitely want to take 6 months as that is how long I plan to breast feed(all being well and am able to do it) My OH has 2 boys from a pervious (weird)relationship but has never lived with them so hasn't had the "coming home to baby" feeling before and I don't want him to miss out on time with the baby early on so if he could have a 1-2 months of just him and baby at home I think he will love it, one on one time. He says it's completely up to me depending on how I feel about leaving the baby earlier to go back to work, we shall see.

I took 9 months last time and I plan to take 9 months this time. Would like to take a full year but it's not financial viable unfortunately. As I am on the staff bank I will be able to ease back into it with some short shifts.

With breastfeeding, hard but totally worth it if you want to try. But don't think you have to stop at 6 months or even stop if you go back to work, it's a great tool and I miss it! Well the calming effects anyway. I only stopped feeding because of pregnancy and DD had formula and later cows milk when I was at work. Our bodies are actually extremely adaptable. We did have some issues with her taking a bottle but we got there in the end with a bit of patience.

I'm planning to take 6month, As long is DP is in contract he'll be working save maybe 2 weeks hols when baby arrives. I'm the higher & more stable earner so will need to get back to work. Beats the 8weeks I took last time anyway.

I'm planning on taking 6mo, DH just 2 weeks standard paternity. He is by far the higher earner so it makes sense for me to be off. He's also going to take 3ish weeks holiday in June/July so we can go to NZ.

My DH is in the forces so he gets 2 weeks - that's it! Dunno how long I will take yet. Maybe a year but not sure if we can afford it as I'm the higher earner. Maybe 9 months. Argh I dunno. We need to sit down and work it out.

My dh will hopefully take a month off after the babies are born (2 weeks pat leave, 2 weeks annual leave) - he did this with DS too. I will probably take a year's mat leave, if we can afford it. We could split the leave, which would be better financially as he gets a good package (nhs) and I only get statutory mat pay, but he likes his job and it's inconvenient for him to take a chunk of time off, whereas I'm not fussed about mine. Dh does compressed hours though so he is home for one day during the week, so he gets a reasonable amount of time at home.

Having spent all last night researching pushchairs, my cousin has just offered me his Hauck Apollo travel system with ISOFIX base for £65. I've snapped his hand off. At that price even if it doesn't suit us for long it's a massive saving.

...it hasn't got foxes on though.

I'm not sure how long maternity leave I'll take, but last time my dh took every Wednesday for two months as holiday. It really broke the week up for me with a newborn. We got to spend family time together and I knew however hard the day was, I only had a maximum of two days before he was home all day. I really recommend it.

I took a year last time. Went back to work pregnant. Had annual leave either side and was able to carry all unused annual leave over so I'm currently using that each week up until December then I'll have 2 months to work at full time and then I'll finish again for another year.

Dp keeps saying he wants shared paternal leave but it's only because he hates his job currently and to him it looked like it was all fun and games for me while he had to work hard but he didn't realise how hard it can be being with a child 24 7. Plus I bf for a year so he can't do that. And he'd have two to look after. We earn the same but I would get better maternity pay as it's enhanced whereas his would just be basic government statutory pay which is hardly anything. He's got plenty of money that he could save and take unpaid leave if he really wanted to but not sure.

I know it's not 'my maternity leave' to share with him but I think it feels like that because that's the way it's always been. Men haven't been able to take it before whereas now they can. I was shattered and only just felt ready for going back after the year so any earlier and I'd have struggled.

That's one of the reasons I was glad I took a year last time, Dozy, DS didn't sleep through until 13 months. I was broken until then!

Evening all!

Hope everyone's OK, been out of the loop for a few days, haven't caught up fully yet. Carolann the night sweats sound like the ones I used to get postpartum, another charming hormonal effect!

Dozy and Dusty are right, I don't think I would've been ready to go back at 6 months, plus 6 months old is such a busy time in baby world. It's when weaning starts (just WAIT for the debates on that, and a month or 2 later all babies are eating the same anyway! ) and it's often when babies start to become more mobile. I WAS ready to go back at 9 months though, but I only did 1-2 days a week at first so just enough to have a break.

Shared parental leave wasn't an option for us anyway as we both got made redundant when I was preg and OH started a new job when DD was 9 weeks old. And this time, OH gets offshore work in the summer so we would be silly for him to miss out on the offshore bonus for £139/week. Plus I do not want to work full time until I have children that sleep through the night!

For those of you with no-so-exciting prams and pushchairs, I used this lady last time to make me a footmuff, car seat apron and seatbelt pads. My DS had a boat theme so she used some lovely boat fabric for them. Reasonably priced too!

www.facebook.com/slobber.clobber.baby.clothes/

I'm lucky Happy that I can take baby with me to work, and I feel like I'm quite well versed in the weaning thing... I did consider going back after about 3mo but I definitely don't want to go back until baby is a bit more of a person, if that makes sense!

I'm taking off as little time as possible beyond the 6 weeks on 90% pay. I work normal hours but from home so it should be fairly easy to get back into it. DH is taking a bit longer off so we'll both be at home for a while. I expect to be going back to uni in September though - that's going to be tough! Not sure how to handle childcare and stuff with such a young child, but it's possible DH can take more leave then as well. It's a bit up in the air just now!

Can I join?
Been snooping since I got my positive!
I'm 34 this is baby number 4 and I'm due 25/03/17
Had my scan yesterday all seems well except they found a cyst on my ovary so I'll get scanned again in a month x

Welcome crazy

Crazy Hi and welcome!

Hugh We were all buying sleepsuits from JoJo Maman Bébé - there might still be 20% off if you're lucky! Polarn O Pyret also do colourful ones but their clothes are so expensive - I only buy things in the sale.