Babies due in November 2016 #5

[FuzzyOwl]

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We're at my in-laws for the weekend and I love them, but their spare bed is rubbish! I've been awake since about 3.30am, gave up on trying to sleep about 4.45. On the plus side, baby girl has been kicking away like mad on and off since I woke up, so after a very quiet day from her yesterday I'm feeling pretty great actually. Very excited to get back to London shortly and go for a nice lunch with DH and to do some shopping. We're going to have a second look at a Bugaboo Donkey and if we're 100% happy with it I'm going to lay-by one in Sydney (I've seen a few places doing end of financial year sales on them!) to collect when we arrive.

So pleased the weeks are flying by now, and thankful the stresses of the first trimester seem to be nothing but a bad distant memory now

Can I join? Due Nov 26th.....

Completely understand that Aye. It feels quite lonely really as it's me alone that has to do this and I probably won't be excited until the baby is actually here, well hopefully anyway. My husband is being great with it all which helps.

I think I'm going to start making a list of what we need. That might make it feel a bit more real. When are you all planning on buying baby things?

Welcome Elleblue.

I think we've chosen our buggy...it's the one ive liked all along and having ow dragged about four different people along to see it my mind is set. It's the grey bugaboo bee, it's lovely (I used to have a chameleon and swore it was the best thing ever) it's compact which is great as my car isn't huge and I'm quite little, and it folds down as a complete unit with the pushchair attachment. I'm holding off buying until after the summer, partly because it's a big thing to have lying around and also because it's something to look forward to doing when I'm in the final trimester of enormousness!

23 weeks today, it's flying by in some respects but dragging in others. I've been struggling with my grief again but am off to the hospital this week and am hoping to see my counsellor whilst I'm dropping some donations in to the ward where my daughter was treated.

Ps I've been shopping again.... A Moses basket this time. I didn't have one with my first and didn't really get what was so great about them. With my second a friend bought me one and it was a revelation in cosy sleeping during the first few months especially as I could carry it round with me when I was playing with my first child.

A couple of question about car seats, I'm completely lost having never done this before.

We've just bought a Nissan Qashqai so how would I find out if a car seat is compatible with the car? Also, my MIL said she'd buy us a travel system so it would include a car seat but is it worth instead buying a car seat and pram/ pushchair separately? So confused...

Welcome Elle is this your first baby? How have you been feeling so far?

Need really sorry you are struggling, but I'm glad you can see your counsellor soon, it's so important to have that support.
Ps-the mores basket is gorgeous!

car seats personally I would start off by looking at which is the safest one (Which website), when I had DS it was one of the Maxi Cosi seats, the maxi cosi website will allow you to put in your car details and tell you if it is compatible or not. Although lots of prams are "travel systems" they don't actually all come with the car seat in the package, it just means that some car seats will clip on, but lots of them do also come with car seats too, often maxi cosi/britax. So for me, I would start off with safest car seat and work from there with what that means in terms of which travel system. I suspect the QashQai has a large boot so you shouldn't be too restricted in that respect!

Thanks so much for all of the support on Friday, I am feeling much better after lots of sleep and having talked to DH about how I am feeling. I will talk to midwife and/or GP though as I know these feelings can come in waves so it would be good to have some support for when/if it gets bad again.

Welcome Elle!

Need that Moses basket is very sweet. If we didn't have the Stokke Sleepi Mini I would definitely be getting one, but I just don't think we'll have the room to store it after we're done. I also love the new grey bugaboo colour- we will also be getting the grey (possibly with the light pink seat liner- won't need a footmuff in Aus!)

Bobcat, does your car have ISOfix? It's by far the sturdiest way to fix a car seat in (if it's a new/relatively new car it should have it). I would get a base so you can get the capsule in and out easily if you're going for a travel system. A friend said baby shows are quite good for travel systems- they got their car seat thrown into the (already discounted!) price of the travel system. Worth a try if you have a baby show between now and due date.

Cake, glad you're feeling a bit better. I have days where I get really anxious, but I've learnt they pass after a day or two and I'll have a good few days/a week of being okay. Obviously not on the same level as you, but as someone who's suffered with anxiety and depression their whole life, you have my every sympathy and great that you have a support system/steps in place for if you start struggling again.

place marking

Intrigued to hear about the flurry of Bugaboo Bee purchases! I'm really tempted but then read some mixed reviews on Mumsnet. But to be fair every product usually has some people who hate it. Are you guys getting the bassinet/baby cocoon thing too? I'm torn between the Bee and the iCandy Peach.

I made a giant excel spreadsheet of stuff to buy yesterday (my version if nesting, since we're moving before baby arrives) based on a v helpful list from a good friend who just had a baby. She made me swear that as I'm going to try to breastfeed that I should get an electric pump. So passing on that pearl of wisdom!

I think I'll definitely get the Chicco next2me- bit ugly, but doubles as a travel cot and the baby is then right next to you. I love the snuzpod too, bit it's more expensive and some complain the baby had grown out of it too quickly.

Happy Sunday all!

Thanks for the car seat advice all, it's very helpful. Smells I believe it does have an Isofix which is handy.

Just booked onto the NCT course, ours is at the end of September which doesn't seem too far away. We're also doing the NHS sessions as well, so hopefully I'll be less clueless than I am now.

My list making went quite well, I've discovered that babies don't really need that much. Think we'll pick up the essentials soonish and then see what happens after. I did buy the wallpaper for the baby's room so we can make a start at some point, although he'll be in with us for the first few months. But it'll be good to get it done beforehand.

Bobcat we used to have a Qashqai and it was set up for isofix which last time I checked is definitely the safest way to attach your car seat each time. Even my mini has isofix in the back which has made me smile...I'm optimistically keeping my car for now but if I'm honest I think I'll have to swap for something else by Christmas.

Latinata I think there's mixed reviews about everything. I know the latest Bugaboo Bee has some modifications that make it better/easier to use than the original models. But really you've just got to go with what you like.

Cake thank you, I'm definitely due a catch up with my counsellor. Even now 15 months later I still can't quite believe she is gone...

15 months is no time at all need so so sorry she isn't here with you.

We have gone for a cybex car seat, which has isofix and this arm prong thing! Basically it looks so safe I think my baby could rocket to space & be fine!

We went for the m&p urbo2, quite compact which is good for me as my boot also houses our dog when we travel! We also bought a baby bjorn, it's looks like a parachute but very sturdy!

I Have had a stressful week, had to move out our house for home improvements, moved in with my IL's then my FIL was rushed to hospital! Thankfully he is on the mend! It never rains but pours! I caved & had a glass on wine now I feel guilty!!

Sorry to here some of you have been struggling. I was a bit ambivalent to the pregnancy but now I have movement & a actual bump I have become super excited! I think it happens at different times for everyone. These feelings are totally normal so please don't give your hard a time! this thread is so supportive so you always have somewhere to vent! I am loving the positive vibes on this thread xx

Woody glad you FIL is okay! That must have been scary.

My SIL just put some photos up on FB (not tagged thank god!) from a party they had yesterday and I look horrendous. So unbelievably fat. I'm sort of hunched over a bit talking to my husband but it's really upset me- I've just bought some new clothes which I felt comfortable in and I thought looked good and in this photo I look absolutely massive ☹️ I am not someone who can hold much extra weight well, guess this confirms it. Part of me wonders if she put it up as a passive aggressive 'fuck you' as I was saying yesterday how much I am loving pregnancy and how happy I am, and she hated her pregnancy, so much that they are one and done. In all the photos of her she's smoothed out her skin and edited things, but not anyone else, only herself. She has real form for being a mean girl and if that was the desired effect, it's worked. I feel like shit

Woody you're right, this is such a supportive and positive thread, thanks everyone! Very glad your FIL will be ok, but that must have been scary.

smells if your SIL did that on purpose then she sounds like a bit of a bitch. I know it is easier said than done, but focus on the fact that you are growing a human, your own little miracle. It's also possible it was just a really unflattering angle, I'm sure you look much better in real life than you do in the pics she posted. I can't believe she actually photoshopped herself in the pics!

Smells I agree with cake, if she has done that, it says a lot more about her than she obviously realises. Also, people will look at the photos of her and know they've been photoshopped. Gosh that's so vain! She's obviously very insecure. One of those times where you just have to say "her issues", and be glad you don't have to deal with all the conflicts going on in her head; which must be exhausting.

You'll be your own worst critic too, bet you don't look half as bad as you think you do

Smells I'm sure you look fab. You should of course rise above it, but a quick 'You MUST teach me how to Photoshop myself like you do" comment on Facebook couldn't hurt, could it?!

Woody, have you read 'Expecting Better'? It has a fab chapter on the 'vices' and actually looks at the scientific research behind things like alcohol. Her conclusion is that a small glass a day from the 2nd trimester is totally fine. I have about 2 150ml glasses per week & am totally guilt-free... So don't beat yourself up!!

Ha! LOVE Latin's suggestion for a fb comment!

Haha Latina, I needed that chuckle!

Just finished my first day of this new work contract after coming down with a terrible cold all weekend! I swear any illness is triply bad when you're preggo. But hot soup, hot bath and crawling into bed at 8:30 is making me feel better. A colleague also bought me a chocolate eclair and I nearly cried! Is anyone else still able to wear heels? I'm not sure my back can take anymore after today.

Have a lovely Monday!

I intend to walk into the hospital in labour in heels Bolly

I'll get back to you on how that pans out!

I also love Latina suggestion for a FB comment but let me know if you want me to photoshop her for you Smells and then you can post your own revenge picture!

Looking forward to hearing how that goes Aye.

Glad your FIL is ok Woody and one drink won't cause any problems at all.

Hope everyone is doing ok and scans continue to go well.

I can't type much as I'm on holiday with a poor signal, but cake, I just wanted to say I could have written everything you wrote on the other thread. You're not alone. I'm going to go back and see the GP next week again. My moods are still all over the place, very up and down, and I'm not really feeling anything at all towards the baby other than hating being pregnant (and so kind of resenting it for that). Hope you feel better soon x

Thanks Thurlow I hope the GP can help you and that in the meantime the holiday does you the world of good. I've been feeling a bit brighter since my Friday post, but my feelings (or apparent lack of) towards the baby are pretty much the same. I'm in the "burying head in sand" stage of my mood cycle/pendulum, it's better than the "what have I done" and non stop crying stage.

TMI question-does anyone else have a sweaty groin? It's one of the more unpleasant pregnancy side effects I've been experiencing the last week or so, I'm sure it is because bump is bigger. I think I'm going to have to ditch the work tights and wear floaty summer dresses instead. Roll on Autumn weather.....