March 2016 Babies!! Thread #7 The one where we all say.... "Stay put Flump!!"

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Stay where you are Flump!!!

Hi waterbaby nice to meet you. Come and join in the chattering

Baby is on the move this afternoon, it's having such a wriggle it's almost tickling me.

Productive afternoon here I've got two more presents to wrap and then I'm done!!!! Whoop whoop then the sofa is mine for a snooze...bliss.

Welcome water!

That sounds awful Beautiful, does your current midwife know all this? How old is your ds, hospitals can change a lot in a few years.

I'm the opposite me, I'm mostly in jeans and plain tops, really boring. Growing out of my two nicer work outfits and just wearing jeans to work every day. I need something nice-ish to wear to the in-laws new year's eve party - either a not too dressy dress, or a spangly top to wear with my black jeans. Anyone seen anything?

I've just inflated my gym ball, am on a roll. God knows what ds is going to make of it...

Hello everyone! Hope you've all had a nice weekend. I've not been on here for a couple of days and the thread has moved pn so much in that time, so apologies if I miss anyone out.

Welcome water and congratulations on your pregnancy.

Missi Lovely pictures and great to hear that Zach is doing so well.

Beautiful No wonder you were so upset about having a hospital birth after such a bad experience with your first. Hopefully the staff will have changed by now and the mws looking after you will be nicer and a lot more professional. I'm so angry on your behalf that they treated you like that . And I'm sure they would take into consideration your previous quick labour - I can't see them risking your baby's health especially if its 45 minutes to the hospital.

Indom I have the Hana stretchy wrap whixh I love and used up to around 9 months with ds. I carried him in it for an entire evening when he was 7 months old (though the size of an average 9-10month old) and didn't feel achey or uncomfortable at all. I chose the Hana because it is one of the lightest wraps so good for when the weather gets warmer. The only downside is getting the tie right but if you already have experience of slings then you will probably be ok. One of my friends had the caboo close which she let me try and that's very quick and easy to use.

Paper only 9 weeks to go?! That's so exciting. Its all getting very real now...

Sorry to here about the rubbish nights sleep Paper and Me.

I've had a lovely day today. Took ds to a huge farm park for our annual xmas meet up with my db, sil and niece. I'm a bit at how advanced my dn is - she is talking in complete sentences already and she's not even 2! Meanwhile

... My ds spent the day charging around like an overexcited labrador screaming 'wheeeeeee!!'. She is 2.5 months older than him but I really can't imagine him being that mature by March! He has lots of other nice qualities though .

Thanks Trinpy, I'm not an experienced wrapper (but used an ergo for 4 years!) but my friend is a sling consultant so will tie me up, I'm sure! I'll have a look at the Hana. It sounds similar to the Calin Bleu gauze wraps (which are also really inexpensive!).

Ha! My DS was speaking in sentences by 2 too. But it meant we had a stream of toddler-logic (I.e. None) and he could argue (again, illogically) convincingly from then too! People think that being able to express themselves would make a child less frustrated & tantrummy - this is not the experience we had!

Don't compare kids, they all have their own developmental trajectories and different aptitudes! (DS's friend talked very late, and still has difficulty, but has incredible artistic ability, and is flying with his reading and writing).

I like the look of the Caboo but I'm going to wait for my NCT classes before I buy, apparently there's a session where they bring lots along to try. Im looking forward to the classes, mine start straight after Christmas, I think it will make it all feel more real!

I've spent the afternoon wrapping, I think it took me nearly two hours but I'm done! (Except for the presents we have yet to buy - there are still a couple I need to get next week, I'm not very organised this year!)

Ooh that's useful indom, its definitely worth being confident with the tie before you try to do it on your own with a floppy headed newborn (this is where I went wrong ).

I've actually never heard a 22 month old talking like that, which was why I was a bit shocked! But maybe its more normal than I thought. My cousin's ds didn't speak until he was 3, no sen, and has no issues with speech now so there must be a wide range of whats normal.

me I used a stretchy wrap with DS till he was about 3 months and my back couldn't quite handle it anymore. Switched to an Ergo, and then a Babyhawk (def. prefer the latter) which provided a better 'frame' for me. It really helps to try lots of different ones, they suit different people.

trinpy arrrgh ... "normal" development ranges! My SIL's niece (her DB's DD) is a couple of weeks younger than my DS and was doing the complete sentences before 2 thing. DS didn't even have a dozen words by his second birthday and was referred to SALT at 3 yo when he still was only doing a very few 2 word sentences. The little pain in the butt refused to speak at all at his first assessment, but after zero actual therapy, only a couple of follow-up assessments and then discharge from the service, now he never shuts up and is exactly where a 3.5 yo should be for both receptive and expressive language. Oh yes, as of this month he's also reading short words (think Ant and Bee). Where the hell did that come from? When I think of all the worry we had ...

beautiful I hope your midwife can help to make you feel better about your options. A c-section can be a good choice and need not affect BFing or bonding, especially if it is planned. Some women even find they feel well enough to drive after a couple of weeks. You may need to push to be heard - the "healthy mum, healthy baby" mantra is often biased towards the baby, and it needs to be as balanced as possible, recognizing that mum's MH is important too.

Hi everyone

Wow it's so lovely reading everyone's messages. I'm on here nearly every day even though I don't contribute much I love reading all your stories.

Missi I'm so pleased Zach is getting on so well he looks fab in the photos. Having that skin on skin time must be so precious.

Hi Waterbaby xx

The toddler stories have been making me smile

I've been really struggling with my anxieties the past few weeks. I lost my Mum last year and I wish so badly she was here. She was a midwife (and had 5 kids), she would have been amazing to answer all of my worries.

I twanged my trouser elastic on my belly today and I'm convinced it was against my little girls head, I can't help thinking I've done some damage. Then the other day she wasn't wriggling so without thinking I got the torch on my phone and shone it into my belly for a few seconds and now I'm beyond paranoid I've damaged her eyes. Things like this I wish my Mum was here to ask her about. It makes me so sad. There is going to be nothing left of my darling baby by the time I've finished. Everything I do is wrong all of the time I feel like I'm not looking after her properly.

On the surface me and hubby are so well prepared we have a beautiful nursery, our furniture is set up, he has put the blinds up today and they look gorgeous. We collect our pram and car seat just after Christmas and are really well organised but I just feel like I can't do any right! Every day I put her in harms way or do something to hurt her!! The things is once she's here I know I will be a great Mother. I have no doubts whatsoever!!! Sorry for venting ladies I just feel really shit.

Hope everyone else is ok

gem, sorry to hear you lost your mum. She does sound like she'd be a fantastic person to have around!

What would she say to all your worries?

I'm sure on a rational level you know that none of those things could hardly even have disturbed your baby, let alone damaged her. You're doing fine, don't beat yourself up.

I wish we were so organised! We need to swap DS into the other room, actually buy a crib, and find some storage furniture ( and somewhere to put it) for this one! I fear it'll never get done!

Btw, vent away, it's exactly what this thread/place is for.

Hi Indomitable,

Thank you very much. My Mum would have probably very firmly told me to "get a grip" as it was her favourite saying

She knew all about my anxiety and even though she would reassure she would firmly tell me if my worrying was excessive and that is sometimes what I need.

I just wish she was here so I could share all of this with her. I was her "first born" as she would say. We had such a close relationship. She died 6 weeks before my wedding the weekend of my husbands stag do. She died of breast cancer. I'm not sure if it's my hormones or what but I've cried about losing her the past couple of months more than I did when she died. I don't know if I've ever gotten over it really.

Thanks for letting me talk about it

It's completely understandable, gem. She sounds fantastic, I can't imagine how you just be feeling.

I wish I had a midwife like her!

Thinking of you Gem, it must be incredibly hard. I think pregnancy is a time when, if you have a good relationship with your mum, that it can help bring you even closer as you know they understand what you're going through. I think that combined with hormones, and the fact you lost her so recently must be making it so hard for you.

With regards to your anxiety I guess maybe just try to imagine your
Mum and her responses whenever you find yourself struggling with it?

Indom, I have done about as much prep as you, that is nothing! I have no cot/crib for Zach for when he comes home, no storage for his clothes (or even anywhere to put any). Good job he's tiny as he needs to be to fit in our house, lol!

Welcome Waterbaby!

Beautiful, I had no issues with breastfeeding, bonding of recovery after my csection with DS1, it would definitely be harder to have one with kids already but a couple of my good friends have had csection number two recently with toddlers in tow and have coped fine. You'll be fine if you need one.

Hello! I've been reading but struggling to find the time to post. It's been crazy busy with DD's birthday, weddings, Xmas visits etc etc.

missi Zachary looks just gorgeous and it sounds like he's doing so well. You really are amazing going through all this and yet sounding so together (and managing to pump for him). The birth sounds terrifying. I hope you're finding time to process everything.

gem since having babies I haven't been off the phone to my mum! I think being pregnant etc really does make you reevaluate your own relationship with your mum and I've certainly relied on mine loads. I think it's totally normally to be thinking more about your mum and v normal to miss her. The anxiety sounds tough. I am SO impressed at how prepared you are! I keep telling myself we'll get clothes, buggy rtc sorted after Xmas...

Interesting chat re slings. I had a stretchy but found it a faff to tie with a screaming newborn, so am hoping to get a nct closer Fabio. Anyone else used one? We have a becco for when the baby is older, although dd hated slings, despite wanting to be held most of the time!

beaut so sorry about the placenta and hospital birth stress. Fingers crossed all is ok at the next scan. It's good they've caught this potential issue and can treat it, but rubbish that you may have it in the first place.

I totally get the c section fears. This baby is breach/transverse and I'm dreading that we might end up with one (no idea why some people insist on them!). DD was breach until 36 weeks, so keeping everything crossed this one turns too... I'll be getting out my ball after Xmas and like you say suz can imagine battling the toddler for time on it.

Nearly Xmas but still have 3 days at work to go. Roll on Thursday...

Nct closer caboo even...

My belly has hiccups!

Aww indom! That's cute. I've felt the odd boney/tiny foot or elbow prodding through my bump, which seems super early to be feeling that already. Kinda reminds me there's a baby in there...

Gem, that sounds really hard. It's definitely a time you want your mum (if you had a good relationship) and I can't imagine how tough it must be

Good call waiting until after Christmas crispy - within minutes of nodding very seriously along to the whole 'don't play with mummy's special ball' talk, it had been bounced into the Christmas tree! I couldn't wait any longer, I'm so uncomfortable in the evenings on the sofa as I can't sit upright enough without squashing myself, but reclining hurts my back. Ball is working!

gem so sorry to hear about your mum. and un-mumsnetty hugs for you, I can't imagine how hard that is. I hope you have other family to support you? I don't think you ever really get over losing someone that close to you, I think you learn to adapt and live with it IYSWIM, and there's no shame at all in feeling sad and missing her, especially now when you're expecting a baby.

I also have bad anxiety so I know how horrible it is. I find not much helps mine, other than exercise (which I hate!!).

For the past week or so when I walk I've been having shooting pains through my bum and into my leg on the left side (though it seems to happen when I move my right leg too, but I only feel pain in the left side). Told my midwife at my 28 wk appointment on saturday and she's referred me for physio. Does this sound like sciatica to anyone? I presumed it wasn't pelvic girdle as it's only in my bum and leg....

That's brilliant, Crispy! I had a foot a week or so ago, I was amazed. I could feel the length of it. Tiny little thing! Not again since though.

I've seen lots of people beginning to worry about breech/transverse babies. I want to join that club, except this thing seems to still be doing somersaults - though not the big ones you can feel, but just still completely unpredictable kicks. I blame my "relaxed" abdominals. I swear DS was head down by now.

Stupid question: how would I know if my baby is breech or transverse etc? Should my midwife be telling me?

Does sound like sciatica to me maybe. Hope the physio can do something for you. (I used to get sciatica, but an ex-physio friend once did some twisty thing with me and it's never been a problem since. Probably can't do it when pg though, and I probably just got lucky.)

I think you can tell largely by where you're getting kicked. But that depends on whether baby's got its legs straight, and therefore up by its head, or bent, and by its bum.

With DS, I could feel a solid area of bump down my right hand side (his back), and had kicks in the top right (with some smaller tickles lower on the left from his hands).

This one is definitely either side, top & bottom. Like a flipping octopus.

Your midwife should be able to tell, ask next time you have an appointment.

Jeebus, I've totally confused my left and right there. DS was head down, his back on my left, kicks top right quadrant (now that I think about it, that might explain the ongoing twinges I get there) and some lower on the right.

When I had Braxton Hicks toward ms the end I could feel his head being jammed into my cervix. Oh the joys...!