October baby bus #2

[MrsEvansAlmost]

Hello new thread to chat on as we filled up the first!!

I have also evidently lost the ability to spell and count - 34 weeks!

Ladypug I would be better judge anyone for how they're feeling during pregnancy! It's such a strange time. And it's a weird concept to get your head around. At the moment, I keep forgetting. I also worry about coping with another DC and how it will affect my older DD. I'm sure she'll be fine but we're a tight little unit and everything's going to change...

*never judge, that should say.

I love the thought of another heartbeat, makes me feel a bit emotional!
I have the Ovia pregnancy app and there is a bit on there that shows you how big baby's hands are- though mine is still too early- I can't wait until it shows a teeny hand, but it's going to make me cry I am sure.

Aww twinkle sorry to hear you're feeling so rubbish, hope that stage passes for you. I keep hoping for a bit of that as feel completely normal and it worries me but I'm sure after a couple of hours of feeling dodgy during a busy day at work I would be begging to be symptom free again! I'm the same as you - never get sick - had my thyroid removed last year and was horrified at being forced to take 2 weeks off (even though I absolutely hated my job at the time) as before that I had only ever had 1 day off work in my whole life due to food poisoning - and I've been working full time for nearly 12 years!

Just had a little cry at how nice everyone is being, I feel really abnormal being scared by something so amazing. Thank you for being so supportive, I'm new to the thread. I have always been terrified of pregnancy so I'm trying to just be proud of myself for getting this far and take each day as it comes x

Ginzilla I keep forgetting too! My symptoms aren't too bad but I do have some pain and had some spotting. The doc said I might get sent for an early scan. Got my first mw apt tomorrow. I just want to be able to get excited and tell people. My mum and dad live 5hr drive away so we haven't told them yet as want to tell them in person but I'm not sure whether to wait until we've had a scan to be sure everything is ok...

pug I'm not sure what is a normal reaction to anything any more so don't worry and I'm sure I will feel the same when I hear the heart beat!! Even writing that seems bizarre in itself!! What a crazy time it is!!

Thanks batfish. Takeaway pizza is making me feel a lot better

Hi all

Been following this thread but not felt ready to post so far.

Although we weren't actively 'trying' we weren't being careful either - bit of 'what will be will be' train of thought. Then when we got the BFP I totally freaked out - cried for 2 days.

I just keep thinking what a massive change it will be and how I like our life as it is now with just the 2 of us. Then I feel guilty for not being excited.

Welcome Adventure!

Don't feel guilty, it is a massive change and I think that many people feel apprehensive once they actually get the BFP. I certainly did with DS. In fact, I do with this one too so you aren't alone!

ladypug and adventure don't feel guilty - it's a crazy time and there is no right or wrong way to feel. I am not even broody - how's that for awful! Yet I desperately want things to be OK - but I am not even thinking of it as a baby at the moment. That sounds awful but it's how I feel and I know things will change. Don't beat yourselves up about how you feel, it will all work out!

adventure I'm feeling a bit like that too. I feel like I've wanted to be a mum my whole life, but now its happening I feel like I'm not really cut out for it and keep thinking it was maybe a mistake. But at the same time, I'm totally paranoid that something might go wrong and I know I would be devastated if it did. I think that I'll feel more attached after the scan when I've seen the baby.

I think all those feelings of 'is this a mistake?' and 'will I cope'? are totally normal. It's such a massive adjustment. I love my Dd with a passion - she is my whole world - but it took me a while to adjust to motherhood. We were going to stick with one but we wanted to give her a sibling. So I'm not excited about this pregnancy yet - more anxious - although I know I'll love this baby when it comes. The thing I've learnt about pregnancy and motherhood is to expect the unexpected and don't be surprised if you don't feel the way you thought you would at first. It's nice to share feelings online anonymously that perhaps you wouldn't voice in real life.

I've never really had a maternal longing for a baby. It's more a decision we came to regarding how we saw our lives further down the line. Sounds very clinical I know but that's just how it is. Now it's happening I'm questioning if I should really have gone down this path if I'm not desperate for it ?
But then I think what if in 2 years time I do really want it and it's too late - I'm 37 now. So maybe now is the right time and it's meant to be ?

It was meant to be adventure! Congratulations.

It's so good we can talk openly here about our feelings. I have wanted to be a mum for a while and my life is totally ready for it but I've put off trying because I'm so petrified of pregnancy and something growing in me. When we were trying I actually had a complete melt down one night that I couldn't "take it back" once we had DTD. I just keep telling myself, you want to be a mum, you're going to be an awesome mum (my mum was awful so it helps me to remember I'm not her) and you just have to get over another 32 weeks of fear! No sweat! lol X

adventure your posts could have been written by me (sorry to turn this into a me post but you're definitely not alone). DH and I love our life as it is and the decision to TTC was more because we thought down the line we 'might' regret not having children. I got pg the first month of trying which of course is hugely lucky but I had no time to prepare myself. I was expecting it would take a while so by the time it happened I would be so happy and ready. As it is, I've spent the last week in a really dark place wanting out of the situation. I'm going to talk to my mum this weekend. Is there someone you can talk to? I read a thread on MN last night called "pregnant and scared" which I found reassuring. It seems the reactions we are having are so common - there are lots on this thread feeling the same -and I guess everything is more exaggerated because our hormones are all over the place.

Hi Twinkle, definitely speak to your doctor, mine was really understanding. She also said she has never seen someone find out their pregnant and not be scared, it is completely life changing and totally normal. The first 12 weeks are the worst for feeling emotional and up and down. Friends have told me that in month 4 a happy calming hormone gets released and everything feels better (I hope so!) X

Thank you pug. I think I will do that.

Have a good day everyone. Thank god for this thread. You're all amazing!

Twinkle Looks like we're in the same boat !! I spent the first 3 weeks wishing it would all just go away. Feel like I've turned a bit of a corner this week emotionally but still have moments of panic where I could just sob !!

I have never longed for a child but I haven't worried that I've done the wrong thing - I know I want children as everyone says it's amazing and I want to (hopefully) have the bond that I have with my mum and dad.

But I definitely worry about how it will change us - we have been together since we were 17 so almost 17 years together! It will be a massive change. We are also quite lazy as in we are crap at getting out on weekends and doing things so it really worries me about not being able to chill out.

We will all be fine I am sure but it is a really scary time and it is nice to know there are others who have worries about the future too.

I have never longed for a child but I haven't worried that I've done the wrong thing - I know I want children as everyone says it's amazing and I want to (hopefully) have the bond that I have with my mum and dad.

But I definitely worry about how it will change us - we have been together since we were 17 so almost 17 years together! It will be a massive change. We are also quite lazy as in we are crap at getting out on weekends and doing things so it really worries me about not being able to chill out.

We will all be fine I am sure but it is a really scary time and it is nice to know there are others who have worries about the future too.

Oops sorry for double post, not sure how that happened!

Had some bleeding this morning, a mixture of red and brown with clots, so called the EPU. They said I needed to be checked out but I couldn't make an appointment this morning due to picking up ds1 from nursery (I walk so wouldnt have time to go to EU at other side of town) and they don't do afternoon appts . This means I have to wait until tomorrow at 10:15. I'm obviously rather worried (I'm 10+1 so defo not implantation) and just to cheer me up they said to go to A and E if things get bad.

Aw Shieldbug, hang on in there - at this stage it could be anything so just try to relax (I know that's easier said than done but at this stage there isn't anything you can do). Another woman on this thread had a horrific bleed and that turned out to be ok, fingers crossed xx