JSing Grads turn 21! We've got the Key to the door, cosy wombles and a drawer of dirty spoons.

[teejayem]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to the 21st grads thread... celebrating the success of Just Shagging in getting us viroids upduffed!

For those that don't know, a 'viroid' is from the original JSing thread 1, where someone was trying to type ladies (in reference to all the JSing ladies), but their phone decided to call us all viroids instead!

The name stuck and we've been the JSing viroids ever since.

The thread we have graduated from is here in its 38th outing. WARNING: they're all a bit kerazy not to mention randy!

There is also a Just Mumming thread in postnatal clubs here for once your babies come along, or to keep up with the graduated graduates! It's a bit quiet at the moment, but with all these upduffed viroids hopefully it won't be for long!

There is also a private facebook group (so it doesn't give the game away in your news feed!)... if you want to join to see photos of new babies etc, just ask in-thread!

So, roll call below please, viroids!

la I hadn't managed to do the full daisy course, but my instructor had sent me infor on the third type of breathing when she knew I was going to miss it! I didn't get to that stage to use it, but the basic breath was really really good for me and I certainly remembered that and a couple of the pelvis out type positions for earlier labour and they did help! I didn't think too much about the positioning though, just went with what felt comfiest for me and it happened to be one of those so it wasn't that I had to remember it, more that I thoight 'ooh that's a daisy one'.

Also, basic breathing on gas and air helped as it gave me someone to concentrate on when the pain got worse, counting my breathing!

God popz, that's sounds horrific! Shows that the birth plan can go out of the window so quickly. Glad it all worked out for he best at least. You still went on to have a second though wil, so even if first was hard work you must have pushed that out of your mind. Luckily I have already ordered an easy, quick labour and a baby that sleeps so I think I will be ok.

Thanks lil, employer does offer it but haven't looked I to what it is yet. Will check it out and come back to you. Apparently the scheme is changing in November, according to my pregnant friend? Will send the link over later too.

I think all the DPs have got the rough end of the pregnancy at some point toast. I'm sure he understood and didn't taken it too personally.

Yay for being home zyla, not sure I said that before. I'm cheering on your breast milk from here!

Dulcet - snap! I think we've ordered from the same baby catalogue!

They are doing 2-4-1 now la, hopefully that's the offer lil went for!

Morning viroids. There's no daisy classes here unfortunately la so I'm just praying meptid comes in soon. The mw knows my wishes and is keeping an ear out so she can let me know if it does I have a talk and maternity tour in march at the hospital so I can have a proper think about it then if there still isn't any!

Cripes popz that does sound a bit scary! But a great end result Like others said it just shows how things can change when you are doing it for real, compared to the plan.

Regarding the pain, to those guys who've done it - how bad is it? And is it that its contraction pain that gets strong and unbearable, or is it the stretching? I imagine the stretching pain might be worse as when you are pushing out the baby there is no let up, whereas contractions you get a break? I'm intrigued by the whole terrifying thing!

digi on undergrads thread for anyone that's interested.

dulcet judging by the digi I'm thinking I missed the 2-4-1 deal!

Yay for digi lil! If conception was 2+1 ago and you implanted two days after you thought, it could actually be 1+6 as surely it's the date of implantation that affects it?

yeah I hadn't thought of it like that. just phoned clinic and they said my due date is 2 days later than I thought as they count from transfer day so would count me as 3+6 now I think.

I love my Pregnancy+ app but it does do fruit sizes which I don't mind. It shows scan images for each week. I hate 4d - won't be having any alien baby pics

I get a sharp pain if I turn awkwardly, then I go oh yeah I'm pregnant!

As an overweight person I'm scared of how big I'm gonna get. I'm eating as healthily as I can and hoping for the best

Anyone know what a pregnancy risk assessment involves? My boss now has to write a maternity policy as we've never had one before!

Wow Popz! Goes to show the birth plan is really just a wish list. All that really matters is you and Pingu making it out the other end! It was a long time ago now but during the 1st stage I wasn't getting a break between contractions (induction) and got a bit overwhelmed by it all so had an epidural. It got pretty boring after that. The pushing stage was long but not too bad as it had an end goal. The midwives credited all the toing and froing of DS's descent for my not needing stitches - he sort of stretched things out enough before he popped his head out.

I've heard some bad reviews about that catalogue - apparently you don't always get what you think you've ordered......

I used to get childcare vouchers - it is a salary sacrifice scheme meaning an amount (up to £243pm I think?) is deducted from your salary and paid into an online account. The benefit is that you don't pay tax or NI on that amount (it affected my pension contributions and student loan repayments too). In November a new scheme is coming in where parents pay into an online account and for every £1 (or it may be 80p?) they pay in, the Government pays in 20p (in effect refunding basic rate tax) up to a limit. Having looked into it I will be opting for that scheme rather than childcare vouchers this time around. You then pay for childcare (has to be registered - not grandparents/family) using the online account - I also had to top up with cash as £243 a month doesn't go very far.... In a couple you can both get the childcare vouchers (providing both employers offer it) so doubling the benefit to the household finances. As I understand it, if you're claiming childcare vouchers and are only paid SMP on maternity leave then your employer has to pay the cost of the childcare vouchers instead of deducting it from your salary. That's worth looking into as it is essentially extra pay that you can bank to use for childcare when you go back to work. However you can only start claiming them once the baby is born.

Purple they will run through your daily activities using a template from hr and see where you might need extra support or to abstain from something eg I'm not allowed to touch any if the animals at the practical training I'm running next week. Also I have been given a back support for my chair as my back was aching. It shouldn't take very long to do.

We have Childcare vouchers at work and I didn't understand them. Thanks for explaining everyone!

X-post - Lil how did it feel to see it in words! Amazing

Purple my pregnancy risk assessment was basically the facilities manager looking around my desk to ensure the screen was at a suitable height and I didn't have to reach too far for the phone.... I brought up travel arrangements so those were noted as well - advising trains rather than driving, taking breaks if I did have to drive etc. We have quite an established maternity policy but still don't have rest facilities which is a bit annoying. Well there is a room I can use but is also used by occupational health who are currently doing health assessments on all the factory employees so it is in use full time. Sure they won't mind if I just pop in and snuggle up to them on the couch! I can send you a copy of the risk assessment if it might help or you can probably find examples online?

This is quite a useful link going through the pros and cons of both schemes.

Popz I forgot to congratulate you on your new addition. Jolly well done. Its all worth it once the baby is in your arms.

I was very lucky with DD, short and fast labour. I had to get exdp to shout the midwife over as I had managed to push a bit of head out. It just happened so fast. 12 stitches though!

Oh pis, that is so helpful! Thank you! Will get reading and send to my friend. lil, is what you were saying is every employer scheme is different or is that largely the same for all?

lil Here is the link to the sizing Dad guide to baby development Please don't worry about the digi - you know they are shit. Count down to scan now!

I'm on the countdown to go home now already! And by home I mean maternity leave. About 76 working days I think without weekends, bank holidays or annual leave. I feel much better now.

God you get quite a lot of pregnancy perks when you work for companies don't you? A rest room? I have been well and truly screwed over.

Two very different types of pain Indigo. By the end you don't really get any respite between contractions. I guess how painful you find them probably varies massively from person to person. For me they were v painful - that kind of pain which makes you double up. I haven't really experienced anything like it before but don't know how it would compare to other medical problems e.g. appendicitus or something? But the stretching/pushing is a whole other thing - that's the bit I was really shocked by I would say. Thankfully the worst bit of that I guess is over quicker than the rest.

Scan for me today!

Good luck Fatty!

Good luck Fatty! You too Stoaty!

Well if it helps Wil I never actually got my rest room. I plan to be expressing when I return so they need to set a room aside for that.

Good luck for scan today fatty, we're lining up attempt two tomorrow after the (apparently sole) scanner broke yesterday

Yay for the digi Lil!

Popz that sounds eventful! Here safely though, phew.

It was pretty amazing pis

dulcet employer schemes can vary, the amount you can get tax free doesn't. Basic rate tax payers can be given £55pw tax free, Higher rate tax payers £28pw and Additional rate tax payer (earning over £150k so guessing thats none of us!) get £25pw.
The calculation is done based on your earnings at the start of the tax year or the date you enter the scheme.

So your employer could give you £100pw but only £55pw would be free of tax and NI. The other £45 would be taxed and NIC'd in the same way as salary and you'd pay it through your payslip (i'm 98% sure its a PAYE benefit not one that goes on P11D at end of year but haven't had to deal with it for a while!)

They pay the childcare provided direct usually. There are also rules about it has to be available to all employees bla bla bla for it to be tax free.

pis is right that both parents can cliam, as long as both have responsibility for the child, ie a dad with visitation rights not custody couldn't. so don't LTB's just yet!

It is also salary sacrifice but again that's dependent upon your employer. They could choose to increase your salary by the same amount and then do the salary sacrifice but I imagine its rarely done.

Not 100% sure on what pis said about claiming while you are on SMP but I do agree that the salary sacrifice can't reduce your earnings by some limit somewhere or other. think it might be something to do with minimum wage requirements. Again it's been a while so I'd need to check the guidance.

sooo gone 11am and i've done no work yet. just been doing pg related phone calls and sorting my house sale!

Oh good luck for the scan fatty. I'm already counting down to mine!

Knew I missed something Contractions were initially squeezy crampy backache type pains that I did get some respite from. They got worse until the urge to push appeared then I don't remember. The other thing is called the ring of fire for a very good reason and there was no let up until she was out. But that wasn't too long

Didn't mean to scare anyone with the birth story... sorry! It was just an unfortunate series of events. I was upset and weepy about it for a couple of weeks afterwards but that coincided with the hormone crash! I feel less intense about it now and I'd still do it again

La I did the Daisy basic breaths during contractions. I wasn't as active as I could have been though! At home I was trying to lay down and go to sleep cos I thought it was going to take days! Then in the hospital strapped up to the foetal monitor it was awkward to move. Plus the pain made me feel like the I couldn't really move! Spent a lot of time laid on my side or knelt on the floor. I tried to so the pushing breathing thing but couldn't really get the hang of it. We couldn't really do the whole dark and quiet room thing with being consultant led and people coming in and out all the time... DH was good at reminding me about stuff though - from the birth partner course. I'm glad I did the Daisy stuff even if I couldn't use all the techniques to their full potential

Indigo I can't even really describe the pain now! Started off like stingy period pains and gradually ramps up. I was told that pushing was a relief after the pain of contractions... So I was actually looking forward to it... lol. The pain of them pulling him out was the actual worst pain I've ever felt though. Probably down to the forceps though.

Aaaaanyway.

Is it your scan today Stoat? Hope all goes well.

Hooray for digi Lil!! Official congratulations to you