Dec 2014 Thread #5 - Battered and bruised we limp through the second trimester

[SassehMonsta]

Here we go again, the thrills & spills of leaky boobs, and feeling baby move for the first time - Lets go!

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Yaaaay Miraculous! Lovely feeling the wriggles

Will be thinking of you and your little ones this week and hoping for the absolute best. Big hugs lovely x

I'm 18+1 today and have been up and down to the bathroom like a yoyo it feels like it did at the beginning again! I hope it's "normal" and not the start of an infection. It doesn't hurt, just can't stop bloody going.

peace I have random days where the toilet is my best friend. Last Thursday it was every ten minutes they must have been seeing who can Jump the hardest on my bladder.

Today I've felt kicks. This afternoon especially, it's been all flip and flop and bubbles and best of all OH can actually feel them. Such a lovely moment. His eyes lit up :)

RAGEEEEEE.

I want a Drs appointment, as I have a chest infection. I KNOW I have a chest infection, as I have lived with having them 5-6 times a year for 5 years now! Can I get through to the Drs to get one? Can I bloody??

10 attempts to get through, then 55 mins waiting on hold, had to give up, as get charged more after 1 hr. Try again (6 attempts to get through) and now another 10 mins on hold.

Im going to curl up and cry. :'( I should be at work by now, I was hoping for a fast emergency appointment (pregnant, lung diease, lung infection thanks) and to be on my way by now! I could have bloody walked to the Drs by now!

Sasseh that's rubbish! I don't understand how this system ever came to be, it just doesn't work and only serves to cause additional stress to those who really don't need it. I hope you get through soon and are seen and sorted out.

We've had a bit of a rubbish weekend, after the high of finding out we're having a boy on Friday, our house purchase has fallen through following survey (I'm not quite sure how the house was still standing!). properly gutted and now dreading the thought of starting the whole process all over again, not to mention how much money we've lost getting to this point.

has anybody had any good news this weekend?

Booo MrsW!

I gave up and drove in (while my mobile was still calling them). Receptionist said she had no calls waiting (so where the f^^k did both of mine go?!) and really wasn't bothered that something was broken with the phones. Still have to wait for the Dr to call back to decide if I really need an appointment. Urrgh.

Given up and gone to work.

positive from the weekend - I got my cot out of the parents attic, and attempted to put it together. Sadly, only have 6 screws so it didn't work ;) DFather is going to find the others for me soon (hopefully, they are somewhere in the garage!). Also got baby bath, some clothes, and snowsuit down from attic.

Lovely friend ordered a handmade quilt from America for baby, its LOVELY.

I have another Monday morning negative: volunteer was too ill to go in, but didn't tell me until 10am, when I woke up (thought I had a day off), so now I've had to instruct other volunteer to shut the shop and go home (lone working policy), and I'll have to open up at 1pm. Booooo.

Sasseh, that's cr@p! I tried to get a drs appointment last week as my sinuses are all blocked, only to get told that the first appointment they can book for me was Thursday this week. I could be dead before then the way I felt. I managed to have a phone consultation with the GP who said that he wouldn't give me any antibiotics anyway as I'm pregnant so just have to grin and bear it.

DH has tried this morning to get himself an appointment to see dr as he's got a horrid cough only to be told that he can be seen tomorrow morning. At least he hasn't got to wait a week for the appointment.

MrsW sorry to hear about the house sale - its awful when these things happen and so frustrating.

My positives for the weekend was that we found our pram, haven't got it yet but will get it hopefully this week, ordered our nursery furniture (just need to sort the nursery out and get it decorated) and got a couple of bits of maternity clothes for work

Am feeling a fair few flutters today which is lovely. Keep it up little one

Positive: I might be able to leave at 3pm. Hmm.

Positive - I've been signed off work for two weeks. Its sunny, I've got music on and am tackling an essay that's overdue and stressing me out.

Negative- I feel horrendous - Held it together for my exams on saturday but haven't stopped crying since. I can't see any good in having this baby, and I feel so guilty about it. Can't see any way to carry on doing the things I love and that keep me sane. Can't see a way of making it work in this house. Can't see a way to continue studying. Worried about money, dying during giving birth, my parter leaving as I'm being so fucking wet and useless. Have antidepresents sitting on the table but don't want to start taking them because that means admitting that I'm fucked up again. I can't write this essay because I feel so hideous and its stressing me out even more.

It wasn't this bad a few weeks ago. I thought I was doing ok.

I don't have a rant to day really. Just that I don't really want to be at work and that I have a review at 2:30 and i was nosing through paper work and the sickness policy has been printed. Of which id like to point out my sickness has been since I've been pregnant, I've had chest infection and 2 viruses and one of the days I Was put down sick was because of one mw appt where they couldn't hear a heart beat I was so distraught that I didn't feel capable of going to work without bursting into tears every 5 minutes.

And doctors don't get me started; getting the appt is fine it's just the getting thru, my docs open at 8am and if you ring on the dot usually the answer phone is still on so you need to give it a few minutes then everytime you ring it's engaged - with iPhone there's the call back button, by the time I got through no word of a lie I had pressed call back 55 times!! How on earth is there only one phone in my surgery???

Come on guys we need to think of positives for today. There is some good in a day even if it's tiny and only 1:30 now lol!

bighairy hugs - you are not a failure at all. I have the same fears. And sometimes thoughts but you must try and see the light at the end of the tunnel - you will get through this and were all here for you xx

bighairy you are definitely not a failure! all these hormones and crazy shit going on in our bodies properly mess it up and your brain is just another organ being subjected to the same tumult. I had PND following the birth of DD (and a history of depression). Taking the anti depressants was the best thing I could have done as it managed to reset my brain chemistry so that I could start to process all these new challenges and situations and actually handle things. New things unfold to take the place of things you can't do as often as you like anymore. DH and I used to give each other 'time off' too so I could get an afternoon to myself to go meet mates or have a crack at a sewing project or whatever. It's scary but you will find a way. Big hugs lovely x

Positives for me, I went it the wedding of an old school friend this weekend. Was fab to see everybody even if I felt like a whale and could only hit one glass of champers!

BigHairy, you are not a failure.

I went to a hen night on Saturday and hated it, being the only not drunk person is not fun, I don't need to drink to have a good time, but being the lone sober person in a group of 24 drunk people is not fun!

It was also the first time I left DS to go out, he wouldn't settle for DH when I left, so I couldn't relax anyway

Surgery is booked for Friday. DH and I travel Glasgow to Birmingham for a scan on Thursday and then I'm probably in for the night. Fetal Medicine Unit in Glasgow have emailed me travel and hotel reservations. Dr Gibson is coming from Glasgow to help with/ learn from the op. Should be home Saturday. I have an outstanding level of care and I am a mountain of calm.

Deep breaths and take good care of yourselves, lovely mummies.

miraculous you never cease to amaze me, if those babies take after you they will be absolutely fine x

Miraculous sounds like you are getting fantastic care and that you're in the best hands there could be. Will be thinking of you and your family. Stay strong!

BigHairy I wish I lived nearby so I could come and give you a hug and make you a cuppa and tell you you're fine. You know this, but I'm going to remind you anyway: being on ADs and needing a bit of a hand getting by does not make you a fuck up any more than being on heart or blood pressure medicine would make you a fuck up. You're under such a great deal of stress with Uni and work and running a house and pregnant on top of all that - no bloody wonder you're struggling! Look after yourself.

All the best for Friday miraculous - will have everything crossed for you and your babies.

bighairy taking ads is not failing. If you need them take them. We're all here to listen but reach out to the people in rl who can help you too. Sending you a big hug.

mrsw that's total rubbish. I'm so sorry.

Wishing the heat would ease up a bit, rained here today but still pretty humid.

Still 3 whole weeks till our 20w scan. I'm so impatient! Still, at least I get a bit of peace and quiet tomorrow as DS is at nursery so will finally sort out my clothes and pack away all the lovely stuff that won't fit me until god knows when.

18+1

Engels it rained here too, and it's slightly cooler, thank goodness. Apparently the heatwave is going to continue into August though

Ooh and not sure if this is a positive or a negative, but my usual capital B tummy is turning into a capital D haha!

Positive, my Canadian gay best friend has announced he's throwing me a "shower" I've no idea what this will entail but sure to be fun!

hi all, been away for the weekend ad just catching up! Sorry to hear you re having o go to Birmingham Miraculous. we'll have everything crossed for you and your twinnies!
Had my 20wk scan on Thursday an after 3 ds I'm having a likkle girl! :-) They couldn't see the heart properly so have to go back in 2 wks for another check!

Had my 20w scan and ECG today with fetal medicine consultant and after a lot of prayer and sleepless nights all was well! I may actually get some sleep tonight! I'm so relieved, I can't tell you how happy I am. Gave DS an extra tight cuddle at bedtime tonight. Sometimes we just need a little shake up to make us realise how lucky we are!

Back to the eye hospital on Friday to see my consultant there after I had to see someone else in clinic last Friday who tried to book me in for urgent surgery on both eyes when my consultant had told me he wants to hold off for as long as possible and just monitor the situation. Fx I don't really need to go for surgery in the second trimester!

Miraculous you are in excellent hands in Birmingham. My thoughts and prayers will be with you on Friday. It sounds like they have everything well under control and you are being excellently looked after. Stay strong x x