November 2014- thread 4- 12 week scans and blooming in the second trimester!

[barmybunting]

Hi everyone, we have run out of posts on our last thread so hopefully we'll all find this one easily enough.

Here is to more positive 12 week scans and enjoying our second trimesters, all feeling more human hopefully!

Thanks everyone, I am really pleased (although I didn't care either way before but it's nice to know now). We have no girls names so we really need to get thinking now!

Can't remember who said it but we're not telling people the sex either (apart from all of you!). I was desperate to share (hence telling you all) but we have decided to keep it between the two of us. We also haven't told anyone else except on here that we were doing the Harmony, I was worried it would seem extravagant, but we did it due to medical history and wanted some reassurance.

Ours was planned, had 4 unsuccessful months before BFP. But also agree that it is rude how random people ask you if it was planned.

V18 - call the midwife. It's her job to reassure you. Hopefully she can check you out and put your mind at rest.

Congrats on the scans today - it's so lovely to see all the pictures.

Annarose - yes Bio oil is so expensive. I am slathering it on, so even though I got a big bottle it's going quickly.

Also the migraine has gone today so I'm glad I didn't bother calling the doctor yesterday. Although I will mention it at my next midwife appointment (2 weeks today) as I don't normally get migraines so I'll mention it in case it's an issue (like it is if you get first onset while on the pill?)

Thanks for the advice

I've just called the midwife clinic but they said that at this early stage they might not be able to find the heartbeat which would worry me more if they couldn't find it. So I'm no wiser really. I just have to hope that the fact that all is physically well means all is ok.'

Ours was planned too :)

I'm using cocoa butter for stretch marks when I remember to :p

if you're worried there's no harm in calling the midwife. I had a worried feeling yesterday but it was probably just because I read a thread about miscarriage, found the heart beat so ssounds like ninjas fine!

mummyv18 - hope you get some reassurance!

Hopeful - it was me who said about not telling anyone. I probably wont tell you either as some people (very nice i should hastily add!! )in RL have found out my MN name. We wont be telling DD as it would be too much to expect a 7yr old to keep that kind of surprise to herself and it wouldnt seem right that others know as she doesnt - if you catch my drift!

we wont be buying anything really gendered anyhow so that wont be a problem in terms of what she sees!

Lovely to see more positive scan news and your harmony results Hopeful, how lovely !

This is planned for us, we had been trying for 5 months with 2 chem pregnancies in that time. I am pretty sure we conceived on my birthday in the end, 21 Feb, based on my due date. We had been planning to start trying early last year but DH had another surprise deployment to Afghanistan last year from July- October, so we put off trying until he came home as we knew he would be home for most of this year (he usually spends 6+ months a year out of the UK on military deployment so we wanted to wait until he was home. Have been married for 3 years and together for 12 since we were 16/17 so this little one has been wanted for a long time!

We will have a Christening or Christian blessing early in the new year at the church we married in. It is Church of Scotland, which for the last few years has offered a thanksgiving and blessing if you want instead of a full Christening. Church/religion plays an important role in our family lives in terms of morals/belief of the greater good really and we feel it's important we have baby blessed as we will raise him or her with a Christian focus. However, we are not sure if we will just do the blessing or the full Christening service. We are leaning towards the blessing because we both feel children should be able to make up their own mind about beliefs. A hard one really!

Ours was planned, we were hoping for a September/October baby and got a November one, so not too far off!

Haven't had anyone ask if it was planned, but have had a few "will you find out what it is?" and today the secretary at work said "well, if you get a boy, you get a boy, and if it's a girl...you get to buy lots of lovely new things!" (I already have a DS).

I also meant to add- yes to the rude questions about whether it was planned and odd comments. One 'friend' responded, "but you hate children, I thought you never wanted them?"... I am a primary school teacher, I spend every day with kids!!

What she doesn't realise is that when I don't want to tell someone something like when we want kids, I will fob them off with comments or a joke! She is part of a group of friends but her and I don't really get on.

oh yes to the fobbing people off, Barmy. Just last week, I was telling people at work that we'd like another one 'eventually.' Today I've been showing them my scan pics!

Back from scan, all parts present and correct and it seems Situation has a mind if it's own. I noted how calm it was so promptly started turning over and over!

Nuchal measure of 2.3 which I particularly don't like the sound of. The sonographer said anything under 3.5 is fine and not to worry, but will feel happier when I know the results of bloods too.

We're moving to London in three weeks so will need to swap GPs, MWs and hospitals and think we want Homerton - but need to book for 20 week scan so how does one self-refer? Or can I ask gp here (Surrey) before we actually move?

we planned for a second but started trying a few months before my periods returned ' irritatingly had to stop bfing ds in order for fertility to return but did 12 months so happy enough for him. We weren't trying for a sept/school based birthday though; my father, brother and I are Aug, June and Aug respectively and it's not affected us at all!

Ours is sort of planned, in a not trying but not preventing kind of way. The doctor recorded it as "spontaneous" which I thought was a bit odd? And why do they even need to know?! I think ours is another cringeworthy Valentines Day result!

I'm fed up of feeling nauseous, when does that stop? I'm 14+3 now and feel I am losing out on that precious easy middle trimester!

Glad to see all the scans coming in!

We're going to find out the gender at the 20 week scan - having made this baby out of science not shagging it seems a bit ridiculous to go all coy about it being a magical mystery at this stage!

We're not telling anyone else though. I read some research (in Cordelia Fine's book, Delusions of Gender, which is absolutely brilliant and funny and approachable and I totally recommend) which said that gendering of babies starts in the womb. Mothers who knew they were having boys reported lots and lots of strong kicking, mothers who knew they were having girls reported far less and delicate little movements and mothers who didn't know…. reported exactly the same amount as each other. And that was including women who were convinced they wouldn't impose gender expectations on the baby, so I'm sure I'll do it to some extent.

But I've been watching a friend who's due to drop any minute and has known for ages she's having a boy and ALL the comments are "ooh he'll be a strong little footballer" every time it kicks, and I think I'd get a bit pissed off with that. I quite liked the idea of the Swedish family who brought a child up to the age of five without disclosing the child's gender to anyone, but that would be a pain in the arse and also I'm not QUITE that much of a crank.

Posu - love cordelia fines work and yep - gendering starts in womb and kicks in big style from second they're born. One day when DP and I. Where out and about lied when strangers asked what sex DD was, just to see different responses. V v v interesting!

I was delivering training today to social workers workers who work with sex offenders and peeps of domestic abuse. ALOT was focused on negative impact of gender norms. Its something I feel pretty strongly about ( if you haven't guessed that already!! ;-).

Great news on the good scans :-)

We were aiming for a November baby as I wanted to be able to work at school until October half term and then have the rest of the school year off. Very lucky that it all happened (DH thinks he's a stud for getting the job done so quickly, nothing to do with me of course!)

Been feeling amorous for a couple of weeks, was really bad during last pregnancy, couldn't get enough during 2nd and 3rd trimesters!

I'm thinking about not telling anyone the sex.... im already finding some comments from the few people who know (and a couple of people in the pub that my tipsy friend told) a bit much, people telling me they're certain it will be a boy or a girl or will have hair or will bloody god knows what.... I don't mind discussing it, I don't like being told!
But then on the other hand I don't want to be bought too much gender neutral stuff as it's boring!
It's a hard decision!

DP was out shopping today for a gift for our friends' new baby. He confessed that he got teary eyed looking at baby stuff and felt really happy and emotional. Sweet. One of the things he got was a beaut set of black n white animal,print baby gros - dalmatian spots, zebra striped and tiger striped. Now i like those!

Gosh not been on here since earlier this week and you're 12 pages on since then!

Ours was planned, started trying in December as we wanted a September born (being a teacher timings would have been perfect for Summer hols) but being off at October half term will do fine!

I'm worried....2 children from the class next door have been daignosed with slap cheek, do I ring my doctor? Don't have midwifes number yet as she said she was keeping the file with the numbers in until the 12 week scan. I'm panicking as reading nhs website it can affect the baby early on with excess fluid and things. Can't believe this has happened the time I get pregnant, haven't had slap cheek in school for god knows how long!!

Really busy at work today, so only just catching up on the thread. Great news on all the scans today, and another girl on the thread!

My scan went really well, dates are bang on 11+5 and EDD still 22nd. Bean was very wriggly and waving its hands and feet. It finally feels real now I've actually seen it and heard the heartbeat! I am consultant-led after previous CS, so unfortunately no midwifery led unit or water birth for me, but the consultant was really pleased that I want a VBAC and said there's no reason why I shouldn't be able to do it. We are going to have another surprise, and I have no preferences one way or the other re gender. DD is quite a little tomboy at the minute, as I was, and I'm kind of dreading the pink and princess stage that she will inevitably had go through tbh!

MummyV - sorry you're feeling worried From what I understand it's pretty common for women in the early 2nd tri to stop feeling quite so pregnant coz symptoms drop off, so you probably have nothing to worry about I think paranoia will hit all of us at some point!!

Hopeful - my migraines have been worse lately and when I looked it up it's very common in pregnancy because of the increased blood flow in body. Definitely worth mentioning to GP/midwife just so they can keep an eye on your blood pressure, but then they'll do that anyway hopefully.

barmy - people are so rude! I don't know why people make assumptions when they know nothing about your life

I'd like us to have a christening, I'm a Christian myself, but DH isn't, so he's less keen. I won him round on the church wedding, so hopefully I can go the same on the Christening!

I think we'll be telling people the gender, mainly because we're broke and it'd be great to get some useful clothes My friend had a baby recently and I like to buy people 3-6 month stuff usually because they've got more chance of using it, but it is next to impossible to find gender neutral clothing beyond newborn stuff!

Nessalina I remember my mum saying that about bigger clothes, It makes sense as baby might not even fit in newborn!

just out of interest anyone that's got a doppler and/or has felt movement.... I haven't felt anything that could be movement yet (14 weeks dc1) except sometimes when I press the doppler down relatively hard I think I can feel movement from the inside and twice I've felt what felt like something tiny hitting/kicking exactly where the doppler is, again this feeling is on the inside and I heard it (obviously as the doppler makes a sound when something touches it) and both times its made me jump. It wasn't something I think I've ever felt before, almost like a nerve twitch or something :s Has anyone else had this?

it was a very pin pointed feeling literally like being poked?

I'm 14 weeks & have felt nothing so no help there alita.

The most annoying thing happened today - was mentioning offhand to a never-been-pregnant friend that I was getting stretching pains, and she jumped in with this oh so blasé "Yeah, thats totally normal, you'll be fine, totally normal babes, it passes, yeah......"

As if she was telling me about pregnancy!

She's a terrible know-it-all, no matter what topic of conversation. You're chatting away about say, the Hadron Collider or something she definately doesn't know anything about, and she starts nodding slowly all worldy wise and goes "Yup, thats how it works......" Like she has sooooo much more life experience than everyone else.

Its the jaded little head bob/suck deeply on fag combo. Often accompanied by a weary shrug. Makes me rage!

Sorry for the rant, but she's gonna tell me what giving birth is like at this rate!

Anna everyone Is more irritating when pregnant aren't they! Especially when they are commenting on your pregnancy!
Try and see it that maybe she's very Insecure so has developed a habit of trying to sound like she knows things to fit in with other people?

UGH I knew it. Mentioned the option of a naming ceremony to my mother and oh holy mother of Elvis you think I'd said I was going to offer the baby to an African hoo doo tribe to use as a sacrificial offering in exchange for an eternal youth spell.

Hmmmm how much do I hate religion and want my children to have nothing to do with it vs how much do I want an easy life??

re planning, only the sodding postman has said anything so far but I did get weird assumptions tonight that I must obviously be in a loving and secure relationship, my friends and I nearly spat our drinks all of the table and choked with laughing so much at that one.

I'm staying with my friend and her 4 year old for the weekend and we had a little chat about the baby in my belly. 4yo asked me whether the baby will come out of my belly button and I said oh no, the baby comes out of your bits. Cue my friend running out of the kitchen, gesticulating wildly and shouting that OF COURSE it would be coming out of my belly button, silly!

Oops! Apparently 4 is too young for a discussion on childbirth. My bad.