October 2013 - may our labours move as fast as our threads!

[PseudoBadger]

New thread!

Congratulations falcon and tarlia!

Nothing exciting to report here. SC @ 35+5. Off to see the Liberace film tonight - trying to make the most of the last few weeks of freedom!

I agree with Clapham - it will definitely split conversation if we start the post-natal thread now. Perhaps if people have anything they think could be upsetting to write they can do some kind of spoiler warning?!?
POTENTIALLY UPSETTING BIRTH STORY BELOW or something? That way the more sensitive/anxious of us can choose not to read on...

Huge huge congratulations Tarlia and Falcon! I am so happy for you both.

Will catch up properly but, having had mine, I think yes to staying all together here on the ante natal thread and then all moving over to a post natal thread once we're all popped.... Also, I don't think difficult birth stories should be off limits. I think most people are pretty aware anyway and after all, the babies are here safely so that us a good birth story!

Thanks clapham. Yes this is my first, thank goodness! I have no idea how i would look after an older dc right now. I'm ok with baby not being ready just yet as am only 36+5 and scheduled for c section at 39+3. Would be nice if it all goes smoothly and to plan then rather than it being emcs if she comes early. I don't think she will to be honest, I'm not having any signs at all just yet.

I don't mind hearing the birth stories either by the way, but agree a little warning might be good so people can skip it if they want to.

Agree legally. Plus new mums can give us so many useful tips - what to do when something unplanned happens, what our options are etc... so it can all turn into a positive!

congrats on your last day at work smitten and what a generous gift! perhaps you can use it to treat yourself a bit and buy some lovely new things for yourself? we are all so fed up with our current clothes....

I'm just experiencing a high point of my maternity leave... having lunch outside, in the sun, near Sloan Square, before I invade John Lewis for BF bras shopping. Feeling great!

anyone else's belly getting numb? mine is, just like where I have scars and can't feel the skin properly anymore!! guessing its just too stretched now!!

I think spoiler alert is a good idea.
However also like the idea of all the birth stories being together so you don't have to read a million threads o get them all. And as long as we only post birth stories on post natal thread but sit on our hands and not comment it would work.
Pros and cons of both choices I guess.
Also would be nice to include links to our threads on our spreadsheet? Anyone still at work and very bored?

Been reading art of BF. QQ legally. Do you feed each twin from a particular side? Or just choose randomly? I'm fascinated by twins. Always asking twin mums random questions.

Woo hoo two babies! Congrats falcon and tarlia
So jealous of your newborn cuddles. Sc here with 4 weeks to go.
I'd really like to hear birth stories, good and bad so please feel free to share as much as you'd like to.
Going down to the cellar now to fetch my ball for some bouncing!

I just went to get a pedicure as I can't reach that way and felt like I deserved a treat, but I stupidly put my shoe on too early and now it's smudged and crap!! Rrrrrrr.

I agree to birth stories being shared here, if people would prefer warnings that works too.

Roofio my stomach feels very stretched one of the concequences of being so 'neat' as people keep telling me ;) baby is outgrowing his space and I get the numb feeling

x2 double posts how strange.

Oooh Oooh legally I too, have a question! If you don't mind of course. Do you have to offer the second breast with the opposite twin. Like you would if you were feeding just the one?

GT (and anyone else who has read/is reading it) what do you think of the art of BF? I love the way it looks at everything- bonding, skin to skin, use of pain relief etc rather than pretending it's always as straight forward as getting a good latch- although it may be for some people... But I am a bit at other bits. I've already mentioned the keeping baby on you for the first few hours (no cuddles from DP) and then there's also the bit about taking your bra off and letting boobs 'hang naturally'. Easily done at home without visitors but not anywhere else. Obviously it's not intended to be an instruction manual, I just wonder how much people tend to follow.

The most important bit for me is making sure DP is supportive and isn't going to be that person that says "why is baby feeding that much maybe he/she needs a bottle"...

Can see both sides to birth stories- would be nice to have them all in one place but agree it would be difficult not to comment and end up with split conversations. If I read about someone's difficult birth I would want to send or at least express sympathy... Or empathy depending on how mine goes!!

Why don't we have the birth stories on both? On here (with a little warning) to chat about, and on the new thread but not commented on. Just so there's somewhere to have them all together?

Feminist good point about wanting to comment on difficult stories. May help to comment or empathise as there are so many experience mothers here.

Could post story in both threads? Like that idea. Antenatal for commenting and post for record keeping? Who knew threads could get SO complicated?!?

Art of breast feeding. I'm liking it at the moment. About quarter way thro. However I'm very much of the thought, ill pick and choose bits I like.
wont avoid dh holding baby. However I will (didn't last time) insist on no visitors until first feed is complete and then a few hours rest. Last time I had parents, siblings and partners visit in first 6hours. Think I may ask mw for help when PIL come and say can you ask them to leave after 15mins and say you need to check me or something. Is that cheeky?

I think we should keep everything together.....just adding a spoiler at the top of each birth story for those who might not want to read them. I already struggle to keep up with one thread let alone 2 threads.

Also, I think it will just more and more chatty as babies are born leaving the later mums feeling left out. There are times when I feel left out and I'm due on the 9th so I'm sure that those ladies who are 3 weeks behind me must be feeling left out from time to time

No problem with birth stories being posted here. I think that first time mums and well everyone actually should be a little wary as to whether they read them though and remember that everyones labour experience/pain threshold is different. Personally I don't watch the midwife programmes as I suspect there may be some sensationalism attached. When you are giving birth for the first time it is a little difficult to know what to expect and I can see that listening to other peoples experiences can be helpful to some. I have heard some really intense labour stories from other women. On a positive note I had a straightforward 8 hour first labour, gas and air and tens and a minor episiotomy (which I did not feel after the birth). It can hurt but not so much that women don't put off going through it again!

I've read it feminist and I like the practical advice about the latch, positions etc. but some of it made my eyebrows disappear into my hairline...

I didn't like the attitude to pain relief or non v births. I also didn't like the assumption that breast feeding will work if you just try a bit harder or ask for more advice. I think you do what you can and your mental health has to come first, so why make women feel guilty about stuff they have little control over? It's not like you'd refuse an emcs because you were worried about feeding. I may be overthinking it, but it got my back up in places.

For me, I think it would be unfair to DH not to hold the baby for a few hours! I'll do skin to skin straight afterwards but it'll probably be DH putting the first nappy and outfit on baby and getting a cuddle while I have a chance to clean up/ shower.

Totally missed the bit about hanging natural, hmm, might be tricky with leakage... At least you can put pads in your bra.

exactly wicked...

My SIL had a baby boy this morning too. She had to be induced in the early hours of this morning after her waters broke with meconium in them.
I'm dying to race to the hospital for newborn cuddles but I'll hold myself back. I might just wait until after my own little one is here.

The midwife said I was measuring small at my appointment today so I had another growth scan but all is well. The sonographer thought I might have had reduced amniotic fluid til she realised that there was a massive pool of it on top of baby's bum. (She's finally head down so no more being head-butted in the lungs)

GT, I think that's more than reasonable and may ask the midwives to do the same. I really enjoyed the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding but will definitely be picking and choosing the bits I follow. I regretted buying the kindle version as the handy checklists aren't so handy!

Silly question re TENS machines. Is there a huge difference between the maternity and non maternity versions? We're considering buying one - mainly for me for labour, but DH has back problems so it would be good to be able to use it for that, however, they do seem to be marketed either for labour or not. Does anyone know?

Hey hey. Re the twin breastfeeding, I'm trying to feed them together as much as possible, so if one gets hungry around the 2-3 hour mark, I'm just offering to the other one as well, and it's usually accepted! I start each one on a different breast at each feed. So if say Hugo started on left breast last time, he starts on right breast this time. But it's not an ax act science as I often forget! And it doesn't really matter as each breast gets emptied each time! And in terms of offering the other boob, tbh they're still to little to need any more than milk from one... I don't think they're anywhere close to emptying one side yet!

GT I'm trying so hard not to get myself worked up about visitors. I'm lucky (I think) that all 4 grandparents live within a 20 mins drive of where we are as that means they can pop in rather than feel the need to stay all day/week/month. I would personally rather seeing them all everyday for half an hour than once a week for a whole day iyswim. If all goes to plan though I will be in MLU (no visits there) with 6 hour discharge. I'm not sure how I feel about passing baby round at a few hours old. But then it would be just grandparents I think, I can ward off anyone else for a while. PIL are v understanding, they came to visit with grapes and lucozade after my mc in January and left after half hour saying I needed to rest. They seem like they try v hard to give us space which is nice. And my parents have both told me to let them know if they get too carried away .

I also plan to do skin to skin at first and hopefully let baby suckle a bit even if he/she isn't ready to feed as such, and then let DP do the dressing (no doubt with the help of the MW) while my mum helps me to shower.
Spark I agree with the book being a bit judgypants and potentially making women feel guilty. As I said, my mum had no probs breastfeeding and she had pethidine and an epidural with me (long labour but I wasn't drowsy) and an EMCS with my brother. Apparently, the MW was that my mum was going to breastfeed after having a section and offered no advice. My mum just asked for a pillow to rest him on and got on with it herself. Funny how times have changed, that was only 16 years ago.

The book also says that you have to say that you WILL bf rather than will try- sometimes I feel that's jinxing a bit though. It can't be that every woman I have heard in RL and on MN say they struggled and stopped 'just didn't try hard enough'. There's obviously much more to it than that... Oh well, guess we just have to take the helpful bits and take the rest with a pinch of salt. There's a fine line between empowering and pressurising...

Soup I heard at my antenatal class that the maternity ones have a boost button for during contractions...

Afternoon All... Ah, go on then, give us the grim and gritty details but with a warning so we don't get put off our breakfasts.... (despite having been through it once I'm still a little birth-story-wary)

Mad mw appt this pm. A little over exuberant and I felt like I'd been blown out by a whirlwind when I left Madam is def head down with her back diagonally across my tummy giving me a little more room to eat today. I was recommended accupuncture for the sickness. Might try it. HB good, BP good. Only concern is that she suggested I might not be Birth Centre material as I have a slightly bicornuate uterus. First time I've been told that (the BC bit not that it's a funny shape) Anyone else got this prob?

On a completely different note, my cat came in today with dirty bum area again (perils of having long hair). I braved cleaning it armed with scissors and loo roll, only to pull off a mini-slug?!? Eeewww
Which reminds me- where's my fellow cat-mumma nat?

I think a spoiler is a great idea.

SC here but it's all getting a bit scary and real and immediate!

Congratulations tarlia and falcon so happy for you and your families after not easy pregnancies

I've never read the womanly art of breastfeeding, but from what you've been talking about, some bits sound a bit extreme. I had DS, and had stiches/shower/got dressed before I had skin to skin (DH cuddled him in the meantime) and as soon as he was on me he fed easily (and non stop for 12 months!)