The MW was the one I really didn't want, you know your appointment is going well when ten minutes into it you have an argument that results in you refusing all ante natal care. Very stressed now :(
I didn't want this MW as I find her reallyy cold and rather rigid in her approach, she also doesn't listen and is dismissive. I had her when pregnant. I had concerns that I wasn't feeling kicks at all, the entire pregnancy, also there were issues with my fundal height chart which took a big zig zag in week 36, and I told her I felt constantly wet - she dismissed all of this as "normal". Only it wasn't, DD was breech and had the cord wrapped around her legs which possibly hindered her growth (she was a healthy 7lb 10oz but this was smaller than they expected based on the fundal chart up to 36wks when the growth suddenly declined), I also had barely any amniotic fluid - the surgeon said I had literally dregs left. She missed several key issues and was generally uninterested in her work.
I have no faith in her to see me safely through this time around.
Where I live I'm in the catchment area for three hospitals. I want to deliver at the one where I had DS and DD, I also work there so its convenient for appoijtments and its the only one reachable for me by one bus, id need to get 2-3 buses for the others. She started the appointment by saying I couldn't deliver there and would have to have my baby at Wansbeck. I hate Wansbeck hospital. I had a second trimester mmc a few years ago and had to have ddelivery induced there and the care was appalling, I'm still traumatised by it. I don't want to scare anyone with details but as a result of the care it was horrific. I can't be in that hospital without having a panic attack. She said I have to go there for my ante natal care and then they can transfer me to the RVI when I'm 37 weeks. She said if i go to the RVI then they (her PCT) wont get paid for my antenatal care.
I refused to go to Wansbeck.
She refused to book the RVI.
I refused all ante natal care including delivery care and asked for the details of the head of midwifery for Northumberland so that I could write to her explaining my decision.
She agreed I could go to the RVI but that she cannot get RVI notes so i would need to get them myself from the hospital.
Then she refused to sign my Slimming World form saying that its okay for me to monitor my weight gain during my pregnancy (I lost 3 stone last year and my BMI is 29.something so I want to keep an eye on things). She says she cant endorse weight loss progrmmes. I explained that its more to do with eatibg healthily and it states in the literature that if I lose weight they wont allow me to continue without medical consent. She again refused.
Then she tried twice to get blood from me and couldnt so i have to go to my GP to have it done tomorrow. She also told me off for only bringing one wee sample and in the wrong colour pot even though I was only told to bring one and wasnt given a pot colour.
My CO2 test showed a reading of 3 which is 'high for a supposed non-smoker', i explained id walked past a load of amokers to get into the clinic. I got asked if im sure no one at home smokes.
She said I have to have a glucose tolerance test as my BMI is over 30. I said its 29.something, she said it 31. I said I would only have the tolerance test if my standard blood sugar test was abnormal as i dont like testing for testings sake. She chuffed and told me to get on the scales. I said no as my height and weight are up to date, they were done six days ago. She said if i wanted to refuse the tolerance test i had to be weighed again. I said I had the right to decline testing regardless.
I asked about the breastfeeding class and wasnt given any details as its for new mums and im not a new mum. She also asked why I had a caesarean last time and why it wasnt picked up sooner!
Then she wouldnt believe my due date and has put down that im 10 weeks, I explained I have five week cycles and could only have conceoved on 2nd june. She said I was wrong and im 10 weeks not 7+3 so my scan is in two weeks time.
When I got to work this afternoon I went and collected my own notes from our antenatal department and they were so lovely to me my eyes were tearing up. They said that shes useless and I need to change midwives. When I have my scan ive got to ask the consultant if tgeir midwives can see me instead.
DH is foaming and has said im not to see her again and if she comes to the house for my postnatal checks he will be closing the door in her face.
So now im stressed, sad and sickly.