Due in October 2012 - Part 5

[Kyyria]

Just starting us off on a new thread

cherry slight disclaimer - I've been to mostly very normal lovely weddings in my life, so my idea of a totally bizarre wedding may be less bizarre to you...but here goes anyway, just a few points that stand out! I'm the groom's cousin, but don't see his (massive) family very often.

First weird thing was at the church (the service started at 12.30!), where the order of service said that "the address" was to be by the bride's Dad. But he did his father of the bride's speech instead...and it wasn't particularly sentimental or anything, he just held up a few of her more embarrassing belongings and made a bit of fun of her.

We then had 5 hours to kill until the reception! The invitation stated that at 7pm there would be speeches, followed by cutting the cake, followed by light finger buffet and dancing. At 7.15pm everyone was milling around aimlessly in the hotel reception, at which point the father of the groom came wandering past, all blase, wearing a dressing gown - having been in the steam room We continued to mill until he returned, very red and sweating but suited up at about 7.30, and we were then ushered through to the reception venue. We all sat at tables......and sat. And waited. And waited. No food, no drink, no music, just....waiting.

At about 8.15 waiters started pouring a bit of sparkling wine into glasses, and then we waited some more. At about 8.30 the speeches started

The speeches were a bit ridiculous. No microphones, so could hardly hear a thing. The father of the bride said he might pick up where he left off in the church, but changed his mind and instead read some excerpts from books entitled "what husbands should not do" and "what wives should not do" or something like that. But he'd start each excerpt, then "realise" it was too rude, and trail off. And that was his speech . Not a word about his lovely, beautiful daughter!! The groom had his speech on his laptop screen on the table - he just stood looking down at it, talking at it. Didn't catch a word of what he said (and my table was pretty close!). The best man spoke incredibly quickly and quietly. The only words I caught were "bin bag" and "flipflops".

THEN the DJ started. What a legend. He must've been in his 50s, played total dancefloor clearers all evening, and every now and then he'd randomly announce what time it was!!

I gave up at about 10pm and waddled to bed.

Wow that's quite long - hope it's worth a read!

Cripes Dameflat - what a disaster!! You were offered only a light finger buffet - sounds like something stolen - was that all for food??
Sounds like very poor hospitality.

Mum kept baby today so drove 2 hrs to work and 2 hrs home to her house - but DS happy. Head straightening out and upset has passed - thanks for advice and I'll keep you posted just not tonight.

Attention attention. This is a public service announcement. Please stop buying stuff. So far my total purchases are ZERO. You are all making me feel bad, with your lovely trip trap chairs and the like (you know who you are fjordmamma).

Dame - that wedding sounds weird by anyone's standards. And rude! Making your guests hang about for hours.

Posting from my phone so that is as good as my memory goes but huffle now you come to mention it my hair has fine a bit frizzy..... Buggering bollocks this pregnant business is so glamourous.

Midget I am going to have to put a stop on my spending - Tesco put a temporary lock on credit card today as it had been used more than 11 times in 24hrs....

On another note, does anyone know if deep heat is safe to use? Have slept funny last night and shoulder has spent all day spasming. Haven't dared touch anything stronger than paracetamol but it's just not doing the trick.

32, 24+1, #1

wantanorange

I have a level 3 in playwork and was amazed at some of the stuff I learnt. Such as how toys are not necessarily best for children, its all about using "natural resources" loose parts etc children will play anytime, anywhere and with anything, and this aids their development more than man made stuff.
Play should always be child led as this allows them to "explore things in their own way, for their own reasons." Children will demonstrate a lot through play, they may act out things they do not understand, which is why play therapy is often used when a child has been abused, play gives children an understanding of the world around them. There are many different play "types" (imaginative, symbolic, dramatic, object, rough and tumble, deep/sensory play) to name but a few, and children will follow a play "cycle" - it is not obvious, but they will have an initial idea and follow it through a range of processes until they become bored and the play is aborted)
It's fascinating stuff, and I remember thinking that ALL first time parents should have some sort of childcare training to help us understand these tiny people that we suddenly find are 100% reliable on us (sorry if that scares anyone!)

I too am like you wantanorange we have just been told that the sale of our flat is completing on the 27th July. As we have no house to move to at present my 4 yr old is having to cope with:

Leaving the only home he has ever known to move into nanny and grandads house

Finishing nursery at end of august.

Starting school beginning of September

Getting a new baby sister at end of September

Moving into a new house god knows when......

I FEEL INCREDIBLY GUILTY. :-(

I've not been to many weddings either, Dame but that definitely sounds weird to me, and a bit crap if I'm honest! Well done you for sticking it out as long as you did.

Mickey, could you tell me where you got your baby vests from, please? We've decided not to find out the flavor and I like bright stuff. I find little bits here and there, but never a great range. Also, it's hard to search on line because most sites just have boy or girl sections, so I have trawl through them looking for anything remotely unisex.

Have a good one everyone!

Ha ha ha, Dame, that sounds truly appalling! But in a marvellous kind of way that you will never forget. I'm now amusing myself by making up best man speeches featuring the words "binbags" and "flipflops"! At my first wedding, the best man was incredibly shy and I barely heard some of his speech despite being 3 people away from him. And ExDH was so intent on helping the best man write his speech (which had still not been done the day before the wedding) that he only wrote his own on the morning of the wedding. Very hungover. So it wasn't great. My speech was by far the best, to be honest, followed by my dad's! Then ExDH got plastered throughout the day as it was also his birthday so he was pretty paralytic by the evening and first dance. Classy .

Wow, so much info on playing that I didn't know at all. WantanOrange and CWest, can you recommend any books about it? I'm really interested and would love to read more. I know that this toy has won awards as it has to be used imaginatively, so I'm going to be getting me a couple, but other than that I'm a bit flummoxed. I love the Happy Puzzle Company (due to my maths fetish ) but their stuff is maybe a bit advanced for a newborn, even though mine and DH's newborn will obviously be perfect and a genius

I had a cold all over the weekend, didn't sleep well, was dreading going into work yesterday and ended up having a brilliant day, really pleased with the lessons I taught. Weird how that can happen. Used to happen when I was svelt enough unpregnant enough to go to the climbing wall too - when I felt good and strong, I'd often find previously easy climbs hard and be disappointed with how I did, but if I felt rubbish and expected very little of myself, sometimes I'd suddenly be able to climb everything I tried. Strange .

Oh, and we've bought virtually nothing. Grabbed a couple of things from Freecycle, bought one babygrow and one vest, chosen (but not bought - keeping an eye out on eBay) a travel system, sling and bedside cot, decided on a breast pump, and won an auction last night for a set of Natal Hypno CDs. That's it. Prepared we are not! It'll be fine though.

Have a good day everyone and will be thinking of you tomorrow Mickey

Yomping, 37, 27 + 4

CWest maybe the 2 of them could team up for some therapy in the future? lol. They will be ok, DS thinks it's all an adventure, but I always feel guilty about my choices for him.

Yomping That toy in itself isn't bad but a sturdy bucket would do the same job. I find that 'real' resources offer more learning opportunites, and more fun, than toy ones. So we have real bricks in the garden, real gardening tools, real pots and pans and wooden spoons, as apposed to the ELC version.

I will be phoning various letting agenicies today in the hope of finding a house suitable. I have no idea how we are going to afford this!

wantanorange good luck with the house hunt today, I feel your pain!!!
mickey good luck with the consultant, sure you will be fine.
yomping most of the books I used were specifically for childcare practitioners doing playwork but I got them off Amazon anyway. Type "play books" or "playwork books" into the search engine and you should get loads come up.....iv just seen one on there about enhancing children's outdoor play which would tie in nicely with what wantanorange just said. Happy playing!

Just a quick ask!!! Does anyone already have the Natal Hypno 4 CD set? Is the book with them essesntial?? Few sets knocking about cheaper online but not with books. Would buy if not really needed. Thank you in advance! x

Wantanorange feeling for you and very very best of luck with home hunt

Hey huffle, I haven't got the book. To be honest, the theory is the same with all forms of hypnobollocks- your body is capable, all other mammals birth without pain, here is how your uterus is designed blah blah. It's definitely worth reading that info somewhere (I started with the Morgan book, which is really good, but I hated the CD), but doesn't have to be that particular book I guess. The relaxation techniques on the CD seem to be fairly stand-alone.

CWest don't feel guilty! It's amazing how easy it is to feel guilty. No matter what, he would be finishing nursery and starting school - it has to happen! It'll be exciting and it's a postive step for him. Moving house isn't as big an upheaval for littlies as it is for us grown-ups, I think. And he'll probably love living with his grandparents (more than you will?!)! And as for the sibling issue, that's something I'm worrying about too, but sometimes when DH and I are chatting together and DS is busy doing his own thing I think how much nicer it'll be for him when he has someone to play with, rather than having to wait for DH or I to be there for him. Someone on his own level will be much more fun, and challenging for his development. Siblings are fun! Don't feel bad.

Re the wedding, ok, glad it's not just me thinking it was weird. Did I mention the "light-finger"-ed ( lisbeth!) buffet didn't actually turn up until 9pm? And then it was all beige food/golden diet type stuff....I was starving by then! Cheese & pineapple on sticks, anyone?!

We officially have a LAWN in our back garden! And the patio is going down as I type (and as DS tries to nap, poor lamb. They're making a bit of a racket). Looking out of my kitchen window is so much nicer than it was a couple of weeks ago!

To all those with frizzy (head!) hair, I'm joining that club. It doesn't look as frankly ridiculous as it did throughout my last pg, where I had this weird halo of fuzzy hair trying to curl around my crown, but it is an untameable bush. Unfortunately it coincides with me experimenting with a bob, which obviously is going superbly well Trying not to destroy it completely with hair straighteners whilst also trying to persuade it to grow as quickly as it possibly can. Thick luscious locks & pregnancy glow my fat arse.

Is anyone going to the loo slightly less frequently at night? I've only been once for the past 3 nights in a row! Not sure if it's just that I'm dehydrated or if it's because something's afoot in that region.

So far I have contacted 5 letting agencies and don't have a single viewing!

Londonmrss thanks, bit the bullet and bought on ebay for £25. Beats £40 + pnp for likely a leaflet. Better still if I could be patient and wait to bid, but i usually forget!!! Cheers. Here's to hypnobollocks and the relief it will hopefully bring!!

Dame so jealous of your approaching patio and lawn!!! !! Even if we do get in to new house, you want to see the driveway, garden and general outside!!! EEK! Can see mother's eyes rolling at the hideous public spectacle we will make in front of visitors with a house that is not finished!!!! OOH, what WILL people think dear?? Fuck 'em all, I want my new house

WantAnOrange did your luck improve? Really hope it did...

Huffle if it's any consolation the lawn is about the size of a postage stamp, and the patio is about a stamp + a half! But it's purty...

at hypnobollocks! I've singed up for a 2-day workshop in August and will get the book "free" then, but bought the CDs on eBay as didn't want to wait that long to start listening.

Feel better today but now have an ill DH :(

Dame we are going to see one tomorrow morning. Hope it's good because it's all that's available!

Wantanorange hope your luck improved..
Yomping that toy looks a bit like the crotch-cups that blokes wear when they're training/playing sports... Hahahahaha :) I'm sure its a fantastic toy though.
Cherrychopsticks I got them from Tescos. They don't have much of a range but they do have a few cute bits.. Amazon is looking pretty good too for brightly coloured bits.

Thanks for all the good wishes for today everyone. It went really badly :( The consultant didn't have a clue about my medical history (and genetic issues clearly weren't in his expertise) and just said that he couldn't possibly say wether the problems i was born with were genetic issues or not.. Well what was the point in making me come to the appointment? What upset me even more is the fact that he refused to do a special scan to check because it wouldn't affect us either way.
All I was asking for was a bit of preparation for what may or may not be coming, is that too much to ask?
Anyway. Had a big cry and now I'm Ok.. but still a bit hacked off really.
Now in a bit of a quandry.. Can GP's refer you for scans? Or does it have to be consultants? Because I might just go back to my lovely GP and ask her if she can get me a scan. She was the one that mentioned it in the first place.
Ugh. What a crap day.
Hope you are all Ok. Lots of love x

Mickey sorry you had such a bad experience. You could go back to GP and ask. No harm in asking is there and it sounds like she would listen to your worries and take them seriously.

Marking place

I'm so exhausted, been in bed since I got home from work. I'm not sleeping at all (back hurts, hips hurt, and just stressed I guess - was a really shit sleeper even before I got pregnant) and work is so hard. I've been up since 2 or 3 am for as long as I can remember now. I know I'm just being super-sensitive but everyone's being off with me at work - my consultant basically had a go at me for having a midwife appointment at an inconvenient time (I've already changed appointments lots of times for them, but there are so many) and this other senior doctor I work with is just in a foul mood with everything I do, even if I just ask if it's ok to go on my lunch break I get snapped at like it's completely unreasonable to have a break. I feel like I'm seeing the patients on autopilot - though I'm managing them ok honest, thats one good thing - I just feel so unbelievably slow and heavy, slowly walking up and down the ward and the hospital step by step. I don't feel like I should be this bloody slow already :(
some people have been making sarky comments about how jammy I am to be stopping so early, but I weighed it up really carefully and I just don't think I'd gain ANYTHING by starting a new job in a new hospital at 33 weeks.I did try and talk to the new job about starting but they basically were totally obstructive and unhelpful and said I'd have to sort it out when I got there and I would have to go through all that hassle again to get taken off nights and I'd be on 12 hour days and I can barely even manage 8 hours ones. And August is a crazy busy time for a doctor, we all change jobs and it would likely just be me and a poor brand new doc who had no idea what they were doing on the ward. I wouldn't have stopped this early if I could have stayed on the same job. :(
I have nothing to complain about really, I guess I"m just a bit depressed because it's all raining and flooding everywhere around here and I'm sleep deprived.
Someone tell me I'll get some energy back when I stop working. I'm 29 weeks today and I can't be like this for 11-13 more weeks... I'm so so so tired

Oh squid you poor lamb, it sounds like your having a tough time. I am feeling exhausted and I'm not even working at the moment. And when I get tired I always feel the world is against me. It's completely normal to feel like that given the hours and work you're doing. Just keep focussed on the end, or the 33 week mark at least. In the meantime - ?

Mickey How rubbish. As if there aren't enough appointments to haul yourself off to. Really hope the GP can sort something out for you.

WantAnOrange Totally sympathise with you on the flat hunt. French estate agents take the profession to a new low. I had one not turn up for a viewing the other day when DH had taken time off work specially. She won't answer the phone to me since, despite having 3 other places I want to see. I eventually used another name and landline but when she called the realised who I was she hung up!! Found another place just before I went back to the UK and asked them to hold it until we could submit our 'dossier' and just found out this evening it's been let. There is hardly anything out there at the moment.

DameFlat My hair has reached new levels of frizziness too. I keep wanting to scream, a la Monica from Friends: "It's the pregnancy!!"

Yomping and Midget Very impressed with you frugality. I have created a What to Buy spreadsheet, which is hilariously organised for me. Even with the immense generosity of family and friends it looks like we're already going to be spending about £1,000. I honestly don't know how? Only big ticket items are buggy (£250 2nd hand) and cot/mattress (£120 Ikea).

LondonMrsS Ouch for the ankle! Sounds painful. Hope you're on the mend now.

I have 1st appointment with the gynae at the clinic I'm going to give birth in tomorrow! So full of questions to ask, but haven't written them down yet. Thinking of starting with: "So why the hell don't you give gas and air in France you masochists?"

Hey ladies! The board moves on so fast just can't keep up So waving at you all and sending all round.

London hope the ankle is mending!

Mickey sorry it was crap today - really disappointing :( Definitely worth asking for another referral or failing that could you pay for private scan?

Midget been meaning to say u v welcome for cossie, so glad it's being used! :)

Dame that wedding sounds brilliantly bizarre :o

Cherry loving the stuff about going to the shrine - I loved that about Japan, all the little talismans and bells and stuff :)

Squid sending a big fat sympathy hug! Feeling guilty writing this for all you heroic types slogging on but I am feeling so much better since finishing work (schools here finish end of June as no May week) and as soon as you finish you will feel like a new woman. My BP dropped way down again within a week of finishing. Also on back and hip pain - I was getting that too, woke up on Sat in lots of pain and nearly cried worrying about SPD. I'm finding google and trial and error helpful - so I put a folded up duvet under the sheet as a bed softener, moved 'V' pillow up so it's between thighs rather than between knees and am making sure I use wedge under bump. It wasn't comfortable before but it is helping now. All of this has got rid of the hip pain for now apart from odd twinge when I wake up. Do faff about and don't be afraid to try osteopath or physio if you think it would be helpful.

And to all the movers - try not to feel guilty, kids are so adaptable, they could teach us adults a thing or two I've been having 'bean guilt' because I've gone into some mad nesting thing where I am pushing renovations on like a crazy woman and becoming a kind of scourge of workmen :o All because I want to move pre-bean but we could stay if we had to. Good luck to those of you who are hunting for places, know it's a nightmare, we looked for about 18 months to buy the house we bought and would have run away had we known better :o

Play stuff v interesting, must look into it all!

Eeeek, getting late - night all! x

Hi all, hope everyone managed a good sleep last night.
I'm sleeping ok, not pain yet, but I'm still going to the loo several times a night and it drives me crazy, especially as hardly anything comes out (TMI)! I think baby must be right on my bladder.

Thanks Mickey, I shall check out Tesco and Amazon. Sorry your appointment was crap, sometimes consultants are so up their own arses. Don't know why he couldn't have just given you a quick scan anyway. You should definitely speak to your GP. Good luck

Squid, you'll definitely feel much better after finishing - not working crazy hours so body less painful and tired, less stress so easier to sleep, plenty of time to relax and eat well, and there'll be no turning back so no need to worry about whether you're doing the right thing or not (which of course you are). All those people making sarky comments are just jealous, and I bet they've never been pregnant before, otherwise they'd realise it was necessary, not jammy! Not long now...

Had (another) docs appointment and scan today, everything fine, I didn't even put on too much weight this time. Last time, she told me off for putting on 1 more kilo than I should have in a month - gave me a "be careful" stamp in my book and everything!
Anyway, today baby looked right at the camera a smiled! It was so cute and much clearer than previous ones, starting to look like a real baby now, rather than an alien. It made my day!
Skyped my parents last night and they're going to order us 2 GroBags, 2 GroSwaddles (for until it's big enough to go in the bag) and 2 cellular blankets just in case. So once that all arrives, sleeping/bedding is well and truly sorted. Only and hundred and one other things to go...

Good luck to everyone moving/house hunting/renovating etc, it's bad enough without the added pressure of being pregnant. We bought our apartment and moved when I was about 12 weeks, luckily everything went smoothly but I was so knackered.
It's nice to have the extra space, but you'll make whatever you have work for you - and you'll appreciate it all the more when you finally get there!

I'm off to work now, while I suspect you are all still tucked up in bed (those in the UK, anyway).

Have a great day

Morning all. Anyone got a snoring partner?.... As if not enough difficulty sleeping.......! Trying not to think how will get any sleep with new baby in room.... Thank heavens for spare bed for now!!
On phone as usual so forgive me for not name checking all but Squid all sympathies with you. Do what you can when you can and when u do leave and especially when little squid comes it will all be irrelevant. Horrible nasty feckers. Much love to you. Xxx

Had a dodgy 2 days of v little movement again, except for v v odd feelings much further back twice yesterday. Explanation to DH grossed him out....! Was like tapping above rectum, feeling u get just before u have diarrhoea!!!! But no need to run to loo! Sorry if TMI, just so weird. Tried music on tummy, vibrating phone on tummy, singing, clapping, nada. Eventually last night after iced water and lie down got kicking, only on total opposite side. All main movements have been on centre and left. Now far over on right. Guess it must have been doing some major relocating!!! But stressed mind could not cope well. Been on eBay and bought a Doppler........ Now to drive selves barmy listening for heartbeat on a cheap device that prob not v good!!!

After work today off til Tuesday. Hallelujah. Still stressed as not found anyone to cover me being off yet so hopefully few days will improve my mental state.

Keep well everyone, keep coping with all the crap! Xx