The PESH in a manger

[LadyGoneGaga]

No booze for our heads,
No clubbing, no Class A's,
No more pants of red

The midwives in the hossie,
Looked down where we lay,
A bunch of old, evil hags,
Fucked on Gas and A.

Ho, ho, ho you bunch of Hoes.

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.
Silversky, boy, born Nov 1
SomethingSuitablyWitty, girl born Nov 2
okiecokie, girl, born Nov 12
Honeymoo, boy, born Nov 11
ReginaMonologue, boy, born Nov 13

UPDIFFED

maswera, can't possibly be having a baybee next week, due December 11
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25
MrsFC, joining whether she wants to or not, due 22 Jan
ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 Jan
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24
Muser, blooming at last, due February 27
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Medee, finally over the Haribo craving, due March 12
Casserole, completely out of witty things to add, due April 8
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 18th May.
Laurielou, the unmarried hussy with the "surprise" diff, due 31 May (ish)
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 1 June.
Twinkle Toes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 23 June.
LadyGoneGaga, Compulsive Stick pisser, due 28 July

Actually score I have been getting yellowish crusty bits, no intention of tasting THEM tho.

I haff been bfing for nearly 3 years now and I haven't got a clue what it tastes like. Not going to start now either. I'm not all freaked out by it but have never had the urge to taste it.

it's nice (the actual milk). really sweet

MiniG says my boobie milk tastes like strawberry milk

I have my GD test tomorrow morning. Three hours of sitting in the hospital. I hope it goes ok, I'm not sure how I'd cope without cake.

fingers crossed for you, Muse.

Good luck for tomorrow Muse. I have not had this GD test. Guess it is probably a bit late now anyway. I am sooo tired, I am sleeping so much atm but it never seems enough. Perhaps I am trying to store it up for after the birth.

You probably didn't meet any risk factors Polly you lucky thing.

I am past the half way point on my latest baby blanket, this one for TinyNephew. At least I should get tons done tomorrow with 3 hours to kill. Today I have mostly been knitting and watching Teen Mom on MTV. I am a sad pathetic excuse for a human being.

P'raps you need some more iron PollyPop ???

As for tasting my own produce....think I'd rather eat my own bogies [heave]

Funny you should mention that Clucky, this MW took blood last week to check and I should hear tomorrow.

That is not sad Muse - at least you have actually done something creative and productive. I on the other hand have spent the day sleeping or watching Ice Age 3, or cbeebies. Oh it is all go in our house. We were going to visit MIL for a free roast but she has gone and fallen over on the ice and broken her wrist and elbow. She had to have an op today to reset it all, poor thing. And I had to make my own bloody dinner, tsk.

Good luck Muse Glucose tests can make you feel quite wiggy, so be aware (I suffer from mild hypoglycaemia, so know how weird it can be when your glucose levels are messed with). My advice would be to have a protein snack afterwards to help balance your blood sugar ASAP. Nuts, meat, cheese, etc. And no, cheesecake doesn't count

I am exhausted by just reading about your day. I keep meaning to knit stuff for my baybee and then... I forget. Slummy Mummy!

Sorry to hear about the MIL's accident, Pol. And your dinner

Muse Take something to do - 'tis very dull. I took my Nintendo DS. I did have GD and survived - I'm sure you'll be fine though :) x

I'm taking my knitting and my iPhone. What more could I need?

Oh my god I have just spent the last hour clearing up vomit. Boo has just thrown up her entire stomach contents from the last 24 hours, or so it seemed. Luckily (I think) she didn't get any in the bed but managed to throw up all over the carpet instead. Bleurgh... I have such a phobia about being sick. Especially being sick whilst pregnant. I have just stripped all my clothes off, hosed myself down, brushed my teeth and gargled with mouthwash. Short of bleaching myself I don't think there is anything more I could have done.

Do you think drinking vodka will kill any bugs? I am tempted to try it...

Oh bloody hell polly - that can't be good with SPD. Don't wish to give you The Fear, but it was scrubbing dog shit off the carpet which made Bear turn breech. I suppose it's all this spinning baybees shit!

The "not list" shifts scarily quickly.

I've never had the desire to try my milk or even squeeze fo' colustrum. Tho a MW at the hossie when I was going thru the horrors induction toldcme she advises her preggos to nipple tweak from 36wks to help the bod prepare for sneezing.

popster I too haz vom phobia. If dawg heaves I am outta here!! Luckily MB not a sicky babe!

MrsFC is the lucky hippo winner. Plz to promise to pass on to the next PESH when you've laid!

Morning Haglets!

Polly clearing vom is not good at any time. Poor you, & obviously poor Boo. How is she this morning? And your poor MIL - nightmare!

Scorps I'm going to frantically cling to your preminition dream of a quick, painless, little girl birth story. Thank you.

I feel a bit funny today - tummy feels like I've done about 100 sit ups. Well, how I imagine that would feel as I usually give up after 10 when I see a cobweb on the ceiling & have to clean that instead. Don't know if I've eaten too much crap, or if tummy is stretching, or .........dunno. Out of ideas.

Rocket glad you enjoyed your work do. Sorry about all the polyticks. If it helps I work mostly with men & there's still a whole heap of back stabbing & bitching. It may actaully be worse than women, as they're not even very good at it, & it usually leads to puffed out chests & shouty voices whenever there is beer flowing. This week we're expecting some big Government cuts announcment, & we have our Christmas lunch on Fri - a winning combination, non?

Mas lovely to see you on here - 1 week to go. I also get vay excited when the list moves up & people are about to start laying.

All this talk of nips, tits & orange stuff. You cannot be serious . Really? I suppose I'm glad at least you forewarn me of some of the crazy shit, otherwise I'd be wapping my baps out in front of my mother weeping "WTF?"

Oh, & found out another friend of mine is diffed! I'm about 7 weeks ahead of her, its her 2nd, but its such fab news & a nice feeling. And found out other (distant) friends have just had their approx 5th failure at IVF attempt. They think that's it for them, so will start looking into adoption. Amazing what goes on in people's lives, isn't it?

Anyway, on that profound note I think I'll open my ginger nut biscuits & pretend to do some work.

eurgh, poor Polly.

loz am sure all is ok - if worried call MW. They are paid to put minds at rest.

Sounds like stretching.

Well I am back from GD testing. Got vile drink. Drank first cup, it's vile but can cope. Drank second. Bit more vile, but I'll be fine. Sip slowly.

Finish drink. Sent to waiting room. Sit down. Feel a bit bleurgh. Go from bleurgh to vom in about 0.5 seconds.

Now have to try again on Thursday. Fuxache.

Oh Muse what a pain in the arse. Are you feeling ok now?

Loz sounds like ligaments stretching but I'd second Silv and say ring the MW if it worries you. Boo hasn't been sick since 4am and her temp is only slightly raised now so I think and hope she is over the worst of it. She is curled up on the sofa with a blanket, a cup of water, bucket at her feet and cbeebies on the tv. She is demanding breakfast but I think I'll delay that as long as poss.

alps I fort scrubbing floors was supposed to get baybee in the correct position? Supposedly being on hands and knees is good for SPD as it takes pressure off the pelvis. Twas all good until I tried to crawl across floor to next patch of vom, that was fucking agony.

yet another quiet day at home for me then....

Aw, Muse. That sucks. Fucking GTT is the worst test that I have had during this pregnancy - here, pregnant lady, don't do any of the normal things that ward off nausea! Instead, come to the clinic fasting, drink a repulsive fizzy sweet-salt beverage in less than 10 minutes and then keep it down while not eating for two hours so that we can check your blood sugar. Bleurgh.

In paranoid news, I spent Saturday night hooked up to a fetal monitor because Berwhale decided to be lazy all day. As this was the night after a wedding where I'd had TWO glasses of wine and had a bit of a dance, I thought that I'd done summat awful to the blob. But all is well - the moment I was strapped to the monitor, the little sod started kicking.

And then I carried SIX cupcakes on Sunday. I am doomed.

My beverage was at least flat. But it was all syrupy and weird on the teeth. I thought I was going to cope, but was literally in mid-text to TBG to say it was vile and I might vom when I realised there was no might and had to run to the loo.

Polly hope the sickness stays away from you and Boo recovers.

Drom glad Berwhale performed. Sods law that they start moving as soon as the monitors appear, but definitely the right thing to do getting it checked out.

Oh Muse that sounds bloody awful. And to have to go through it again. Can you ask them to stick an umbrella in it & pretend its a cocktail?

Stretching - sounds fun. I'm not worried really, just anything that feels different in the stomach area has me wondering what the fuckety fuck is going on now. But thanks for the reassurance.

Drom little blighter, giving you a scare like that. He obviously enjoyed a little dance too & was having a bit of a lazy day.

Polly poor Boo. Though I have to say, apart from being poorly a day on the sofa under a blanket watching TV demanding food doesn't sound too bad.

Sorry they made you go vom, Muse. Have they suggested something different for Thurs?

Naughty Berwhale, Drom. Glad all is well though. They do like to scare you.

Does sound like stretching to me, Laurie.

Poor Pol - hope she's feeling better soon. Both of you!

I feel rubbish today. Have a stinking cold, the bone numbing exhaustion has started and feel nauseous all day apart from when I am eating. So I've dropped MiniG at nursery and called in sick. Feeling bit guilty. Now on sofa watching all the baybee stuff on Discovery Home and Health . Feel better already.