The PESH Deli - No ESH left behind

[PerfectDromedary]

I have opened the virtual gin, found the Desperate Romantics and am about to start playing I've Never. Who's with me?

And lovely news about your nephew putting on weight... what a relief for your family. A month will fly and he'll be home.

rocket is so true about just going with it on the day and yep I think the decision is definitely the best one for us - feel so much better for making it. Despite my uber controlling tendencies, I was actually v chilled at our wedding. I had written the lists to end all lists for my other half before hand but didn't actually give a shit on the day... we just had the best time and I can remember thinking I'd actually pulled a muscle in my face from smiling so much. :)

Ski I DID NOT iron socks!!! No doubt i'll be wrapping him in a muslin before long...

Silver hope all goes ok at GP. If you're not happy though you should head into hospital and be seen there.

Muse I got a dream genii and didn't really like it, flogged it on ebay - but others like it. I prefer normal V shaped pillow. Please whatever you do don?t order form pregnancypillow.co.uk. They are a bunch of wankers and their customer service is shocking. I am on to my 6th email to them about an issue (regarding a fucking pillow case believe it or not) and still no response to any that I have sent. No phone number listed on website or any other place for that matter. I fume thinking about it!

OMG to the still born. Was it at term? Any ideas why this happened?

OK so the friend I was telling you about who had sizeable twins last week, the first was delivered naturally then the 2nd seemed to like the extra space he found and wouldn't descend so she had a c-section to deliver the 2nd! She is my hero! Fancy going through that and then ending up with a section?!

Oh god bless her, what a palava. How big were they again?

sorry for randomness of replies - rocker also had my dating v early (had 2 reassurance scans prior to 12 weeker) and I think the earlier the better in terms of accuracy the doc said. So all good!

7lb 3oz and 6lb 10oz which are fine sizes for singletons but fancy lugging them both around until 39 weeks?

Jesus wept, that poor woman's back! Good work though.

good lord okie!!! mind you one of my friends husbands was something ridiculous like 11lb on his own, she is quite afraid of carrying his child :o (let alone twins)

Thanks for the reassurance guys, I am actually getting quite excited now and glad I haven't got to wait the full 12 weeks It will be interesting how the dating goes as I know exactly when I ovulated.

muse its amazing he is breathing on his own and so tiny, I hope the next month or so rush by until he can go home.

We told some people after our 8 week scan rocket, as the chances of things going wrong if everything is fine at 8/9 weeks are nearly the same as at 12. And I couldn't keep it in any longer!

Okie, full term, they're trying to find out why. It's just awful.

Thanks for the pillow tips all.

GP visit went well. GP was tres apologetic about MW service and said they are not employed or managed by the surgery. They have no control or influence over them. Obv it's noones fault one is off sick. GP asked about my birth plan. I said only reason I know about a birth plan is thanksto NCT cos the MWs have told me jack. GP was gobsmacked. I said apart from the compulsory medical checks I have not had any other advice. GP offered to call the MWs and get it sorted I said no need as I had worked it all out on my own. GP looked over my wishlist and said that I seem v informed and prepared.

If no laying by EDD I have to call a number and I will be visited at home, given a VE and if I want a sweep can have one. If no baby by 41 wks it's induction!!!!!!!

BP is good, still got trace but it's not a concern, baybee engaged and in the right position! Basically all systems go......... When s/he decides it's time to launch!!

I was debating a body pillow too - lots cheaper on Ebay - but only occasionally using an extra ordinary pillow under my bump, so not sure if it is necessary yet.

Oh, excting, Silver!

deedee I have managed without a pillow for sleeping however thinking of getting one for bf.

Have also bought teatree oil and lavender oil to go in the bath post partum to soothe the undercarriage damage.

SkyBlue Have read something on here about witch hazel for post-birth shenanigans. Have you stocked up on that, too?

Muse I'm really sad about the stories you've mentioned. Can you warn me when you're about to post these things? Am having ridiculously high anxiety levels at the moment - convinced something awful will be revealed at scan - and am proper winding self up.

Oh Drom, I'm sorry. Please don't worry. Everything is going to be fine, honestly. Think of all the happy babies over in the FESH creche right now. They are all gorgeous and healthy and wonderful. And yours will be too.

Yes I need to go and get liquid witch hazel too - apparently neat on your pad straight from the fridge. Well reminded drom.

I've just watched this DVD my doula lent me called the Business of Being Born. Properly wound up by it. Basically to do with medicalisation of birth in the US and experience of a HB mw in New York. I'm a bit irritated she gave it to me tbh - it's like, you can only have a good birth if you have it at home and there is no middle ground. Clearly in the UK there is. Perhaps not the thing to give to anxiety prone ready to deliver mum? I know she was trying to provide reassurance for my previous HB fears, but honestly I'm not sure that has helped. Has anyone seen it? I can't read any more bad stories, I need to focus on everything being alright...

Also a jug moo. I have heard jug of warm water very useful for those initial post-birth toilet encounters.

Remember moo, however you give birth there will be someone, somewhere who will disapprove. They are to be ignored. The important thing is that you do what's best for you and your baby. If the rest of the world disapproves, fuck em.

Moo don't get wound by it. She was probably trying to instil confidence in your former HB plan - have you told her yet you are going to midwife led unit? She is there to support you in whatever decision you make and make you feel confident in your ability to give birth wherever and however you choose to. Remember only 2% of people give birth at home in the UK. The rest go to hospital and have success births with healthy babies at the end of it.

Muser plz to tell how jug works? Do you sit on it or summat? Would a bath not do?

Muse Don't worry, precious - I know am being mad. It's just that moment of having a skin too few when pregnant. Thus need for look away now warnings.

honeypetal Birth is VERY different in the US. There is no such thing as an independent midwife - they can't afford the insane levels of insurance that they need to practise, so midwifery is a massively politicised thing. Lots of American midwives hang out on feminist blogs, advocating things like home birth, from the perspective that this is a great battle. Weirdly, the American way of birth is where Europe was about twenty years ago. Naomi Wolf's Misconceptions feckin terrified me, but am reassured that UK practice is massively different.

Everything will be ok. Birthing centres are lovely, and a proper compromise between hb and hospital. But you might want to talk all this out with your doula - if she's pressuring you, that will add to your anxiety in the delivery room and defeat the point of having a birth coach/advocate type person.

Jug of warm water poured slowly over your bits while peeing post birth is The BEST! Perfect your technique so you have enough water for the duration of the pee, bearing in mind that after having a bladder the size of a cherry tomato for months, post partum piddles tend to go on, and on. Undiluted pee on cuts really smarts. Bidets can also be useful.

I believe it's a "pour and pee" situation Okie, I guess it stings less if it's dilute? Can also be achieved by peeing in the shower.

Drom I was feeling exactly the same as you at the beginning of the week. I was terrified. It's completely understandable and hearing all the bad things that can happen does not help.

We're about to get a new thread, it is going to be a Thread of Joy. With extra stilton.

Oh wow, I am enlightened. I did not have painful peeing last time. Will bear in mind. I have a handy jug I use to wash Mini Okie's hair which would do the job nicely if needs be!

To help with bringing cheer. Halloween approaches (I think we have a next thread theme). Next year, we can all be mean mother's and dress our children up like this Pumpkin! or this umm, umm

haha that shrimp in a bucket kids face is hilarious :o

My mum brought back a pumpkin onsie from the states when DN1 was born, my sister turned her nose up at it (it was fairly foul). I wonder what ever became of it

I would totally do the ummm one. I am so evil.

NEW FRED! Please someone who is competent start this one, I made a right pig's ear of the last one.

Oh, my heart goes out to that poor woman I'm afraid I can't read stuff like that because I just get too distraught (hormones + naturally anxious do not a good combination make). Is too, too horrible. I can't cope either hearing about it, Drom (and also realise is the menkul speaking).

LOVE those piccies, Muse. As a Hallowe'en baby myself (well, 2 days earlier), who always had Hallowe'en-themed birfday parties, I bloody LOVE it and am already eyeing up orange and black striped babygros and spider-pattern bootees for next year Disapprove of tacky outfits in general, but Hallowe'en is my one exception.

I haven't vommed since Sunday! WOOHOO! My Mum's (v mild) nausea only last 6 weeks, so am hoping and, well, not praying, that mine follows suit (apols if insensitive hopes to those still vomming their eyes out after the first trimester).