Is anyone on line now? Want to talk? My Dad is dying right now.

[Rhiannon]

get choked when I talk so it's easier to type with my fingers

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Ehiannon, you haven't talked with your fingers since 10.30 last night, how are things? Did you take DS? Was it OK? Is your dad still here? Hope you gave him that hug.

Rhiannon, sorry, didn't preview!

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Just read this Rhiannon and wanted you to know that I am thinking of you.

Thinking of you, Rhiannon. Take care.
snowbird xx

Hi Rhiannon - so sorry to hear your news. I know exactly how you feel. My dad died on Friday, he'd been ill for a couple of months and we were expecting it, but it doesn't make it easier. The last time I saw my dad was Mothers' Day - we all saw him - me, my DH, DS and DD. My DS is 7 years old and although hadn't seen his grandad for a while, did want to see him. He didn't stay long - just said bye, bye. I sat with dad and told him I loved him. I miss him loads. Do what you think is best. My thoughts are with you.

Thinking of you Rhianon xxx

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Sorry to hear your news as well, deborahf

Rhiannon and Deborahf, thinking of you both at this very sad time.
sis

Rhiannon and Deborahf, very sorry to hear the news about both your Dads. Cyberhugs and best wishes to you both and your children.

Much sympathy to both of you Rhiannon and deborahf.

sorry about your news, deborahf.

Best wishes Deborahf

Best wishes to both of you. It's just coming up to a year now since my dad died very suddenly. The worst bit is that I didn't have time to say all the things I want to as he was still quite young and it was very unexpected. I feel for both of you.
Hugs

Thinking of you, Deborahf.

It is 15 years this year since my Dad died very suddenly. Not a day goes by that I don't think of him. But the memories get easier and it is possible to think of the good times without crying. Your Dad will live as long as you do because he will always be in your heart and memory.

Thinking of you

Thinking of you both and sending my love

Rhiannon, thinking of you and yours - I hope you are alright - for what its worth, I think you should let your ds see your Dad - my dd saw her Grandad last year in hospital a week before he died and she was 6, and she also went to the funeral. DH and I were both fretting about it but were glad that we let her in the end, and it had no lasting bad effect on her. It was my FIL - my Dad and I are not close, he left us when I was 14 and although he is around again now, he put us through a terrible time, and I wonder sometimes how I will feel when he dies. But I am fairly certain I would feel better if I hugged him and kissed him goodbye, it would ultimately be better than doing nothing, even though I don't feel much for him. You hang in there, and take comfort from your own loving family. Lots of love xxx
And lots of love to Deborahf too xxx

I've come to this thread very late, but would like to say I'm thinking about you too. FWIW, I'd say its definitely best for your son to see his grandad. xxx

I'm back. Kept DS off school yesterday for the visit. I phoned the hospital yesterday morning and they said my Dad had eaten that morning so I decided against running up there with DS and so he spent the day finishing a school topic instead (school is 15 miles away).

My Dad had again told my Mum he can't cope with seeing DS as he gets so upset.

DH and I have just come back from the hospital. My Mum babysat and we told DS we were going to a Pub for a drink so he didn't get upset about us going.

He is very bad, I won't go into details but I gave him a hug and a kiss and we talked about general stuff.

Thank you all so much for your kind words and messages, it is lovely to be able to 'talk' easily like this. Sometimes being physically comforted really chokes you.

My Mum is already getting concerned about money as none of the accounts are in her name although my Dad has transferred some money into her account. She has no idea how much money he will leave, it's such a strange marriage.

Tonight I suggested she have a granny flat with us if she wants to, don't know if she will but she is coming up 72 and may need looking after at some point.

Love to all, keep in touch.

Rhiannon,
You gave him a hug and a kiss - that's a great step forward is it not ?
Well Done!
Even if you and your Dad don't go into details, it sounds that things are a bit more relaxed?
Your Mum is obviously getting your support - which is no doubt appreciated. I hope someone is looking after you XX

I'm really glad you saw your dad, Rhiannon. I don't know how to say this... my gut feeling is that saying "I love you" or saying goodbye in your situation is something that wouldn't be regretted. Saying goodbye is irreplaceable.

Rhiannon, I am sorry your Dad can't cope with seeing your DS, but I guess you have to go along with that. Must be so terrible to know you are dying and won't know how everything turns out.

If he is adamant I suppose you will have to just talk to DS about how grandad used to be. It wiuldn't be fair to make your dad see DS if he really doesn't want to. Your DS will have nice memories anyway of watching Robot Wars etc. I am so glad you were able to do the hug/kiss/talk. How does your dad look? Do you think your DS could cope with seeing him? Could you maybe talk to your dad yourself, gently, about how it would be good for DS to say goodbye? (Just in case he might change his mind?)

Hope the money for your mum is sorted out OK.

You are being very brave, Rhiannon. Good luck. xxx