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Original poster

Oh my god ... Help me please I don't know what to do!!!

679 replies

Mummy2TandF · 29/08/2007 09:48

my dh went fishing last night and at 11:30pm I had a knock on the door from the police .... My dh has been found dead on a footpath at the lake They think it was a massive heart attack, a stroke or a blood clot but will do a PM tomorrow, I don't know what to do, I have my family here with me but it is easier to talk on here How do I tell my dc's? WHAT do I tell my dc's - they are only 2.9 and 10 months Will they understand, what are they going to do without their daddy? How will I get through the days without my dh? I know we argued etc but I really, really, loved him and now he is gone Help please

OP posts:
sarahgg · 30/08/2007 00:40

sorry sorry sorry SO sorry

KerryMumbledore · 30/08/2007 00:41

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battlestar · 30/08/2007 00:43

i am so sorry for your loss.
this is the stuff of nightmares.

weebleswobble · 30/08/2007 00:45

I've just seen this. I am so very sorry for your loss.

Original poster
Mummy2TandF · 30/08/2007 00:49

My sister wants me to sllep and common sense tells me that I should, but I don't think I can ever sleep again

OP posts:
Califrau · 30/08/2007 00:51

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KerryMumbledore · 30/08/2007 00:52

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WendyWeber · 30/08/2007 00:53

Oh, sweetheart

I wish it wasn't true. He was so young.

Kaloo20 · 30/08/2007 00:55

thinking of you tonight. The hours of darkness are always the worst

Original poster
Mummy2TandF · 30/08/2007 00:55

I can't sleep - so much going through my mind ... he died sometime between 5:00pm and 5:25pm, he was alone at the lake just laying on the footpath [sad[ He was there until at least 11:30pm when I was informed ....... What do I do, where do I start, the pm is tomoorow and I hope they find a cause of death ... how can you becomse a widow at 30 years old with dc's of 2.9 and 10 months? ds will noy remember dh and dh will never see dd walk or hear her talk .... I will not sleep again

OP posts:
Califrau · 30/08/2007 00:59

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Kaloo20 · 30/08/2007 01:02

Please don't torture yourself about the number of hours he was on the path, he was at peace and it would have been instant, he won't have suffered.

Have you been offered any meds to help you sleep?

thinking of you

KerryMumbledore · 30/08/2007 01:05

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MarsLady · 30/08/2007 01:05

Try to sleep darling. Think about the babies for tonight. They'll need you in the morning.

Like Cali I wish I could give you a hug and hold you whilst the tears come. Do take up Yorkiegirl on her offer to get in touch. She was where you are just a short year ago.

Much love to you and yours.

itwasntme · 30/08/2007 01:09

You poor poor thing, I feel so desperately sad for you.

It sounds crass, but please try to get some rest, you will need strength in the next few days.

Try not to worry now about practical things... first get tomorrow out of the way. I guess the priority now is making sure the right people are informed, but I'm sure that is underway. Your children are so young.

Yorkiegirl has offered to give you advice - I'm sure she could help you a lot. At least she really understands what you are going through right now.

Life is so bloody shit sometimes

Niecie · 30/08/2007 01:11

What a dreadful thing to happen - I am so sorry to hear of your loss.

Wrap yourself up in a big blanket, put your feet up, rest and take care of yourself.

Original poster
Mummy2TandF · 30/08/2007 01:14

I just keep thinkging that dh was no saint (who is) but he didn't deserve this, none of us did ... there are murderes etc happily walking around and there is dh, who deep down had a heart of gold who will not walk or breath of cuddle again

OP posts:
KerryMumbledore · 30/08/2007 01:15

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mamama · 30/08/2007 01:16

I'm so sorry

itwasntme · 30/08/2007 01:20

None of you deserve this. You, your dh or your children.

A good friend of mne died in similar circumstances recently. He was 40. One minute he was having breakfast, the next he had a massive heart attack and died. It's indiscriminate.

And so so unfair, especially those who are left to pick up the pieces.

welliemum · 30/08/2007 01:21

I'm so sorry, it's just completely unfair isn't it

Hope you can get some rest, try not to think too much tonight

tripletsandtwins · 30/08/2007 01:26

I'm so sorry hun

You're in my prayers tonight, thinking of you.

fussymummy · 30/08/2007 01:27

So sad for you and your family.
Your DH looks lovely, and you have wonderful children, they will keep you going and give you strength.
My sister was widowed at 26 and was expecting their first child.
I was with her throughout, so i know the suffering you're going through.
You'll eventually sleep through exhaustion.
Take care xx

sarahgg · 30/08/2007 01:49

i dont know what to say, i just don't want you to think you are alone, I'm sure there will be some one on line all through the night for you to talk to, just keep talking and we will keep listening until you fall asleep. xxx

alipiggie · 30/08/2007 03:31

Oh I'm so very very sorry and to read this. I just wanted to pass on my sympathies to you and the children at this most difficult of times.