Support For Anyone That Has Lost A Parent

[mummylin2495]

Hope you will all find this, didn't realise old one was at the end !

No siblings. Thanks for your kind words mummylin

Well I will be your virtual sister for tonight . I am usually up until late so will keep my eye on this thread

He's comfortable at the moment, no pain and not distressed and I'm going to try and get a bit of sleep.

Yes, that's the best thing for you now, even a little sleep will be good for you, you must be mentally exhausted.

Dear trucking...
I hope you managed to get some sleep?
My beloved dad collapsed and died in front of me. I did CPR but......
So I do understand the awful feelings when one witnesses such trauma. What I will say is that the awful memories do fade in time.
These days I remember dad as he was, rather than in his last moments.
I will be thinking if you and your dear dad today X

I hope you managed to gave some sleep Trucking.and that you have someone to sit with you today

Left the hospital at 4am and went home to get some sleep. Am back here now. He's retaining urine, which is putting him at risk of acute heart failure. Feel like we're on a knife edge.

Badders, Im not smart with words like some of the lovely people on here, so I don't know what to say other than I am so sorry you had that experience.

Is there anything that can be done regarding the urine problem. A catheter or drain or something, surely they can try something to make him feel more comfortable.

Truckingalong I'm so sorry for you.

The hospital should help with the urine retention? Even when there no hope, people should not have to suffer.

My Dad passed away Good Friday after a fall from which he never recovered. The hospital were amazing, they kept him alive until my brother got back from the States too see him. We were all with him when he passed away. Even though he was unconscious they pumped him full if morphine just in case. I hope he knew we were there, especially my bro.

It's just shit shit shit.

He's never going to be there to ask advice. We never gonna meet at the pub for lunch. I'll miss his moaning. He was my Dad. I loved him.

I was also there when my dad died trucking. The last few hours he seemed in pAin but I was assured he wasn't. I'm surprised they haven't put a catheter in if he's in pain.

Huge hugs, sorry you're going through this.

If he is not in pain they will not insert a catheter - which is an invasive and unpleasant procedure.
I hope they are making sure he is comfortable - whether that be morphine or other pain meds.
MND is such an awful illness
Just heard this morning that a work collar goes brother who has been missing for a month has been found in a local river
He was 22
Life can be so cruel

Do you know what, it is so lovely to see how supportive everyone is to anyone that needs it to all.

Oh that is so sad, no age at all is it. Why do these awful things happen ?
If I remember from my uncle, he also retained urine and they put him in an induced sleep as they said he would have Urea going round his body and it wouldn't be nice for him. I suppose all we can wish for is that everybody at the end of life does not suffer pain. That is unbearable for the patient and for their families. badvoc ( can't get used to new name ) it is so nice to see you. You too have had so much upset in the last three years. I hope you will be in line to have a lot if good years ahead now.

He has a catheter in. They put it in a few days ago but his kidneys are failing apparently so the urine output isn't great. He's not in pain. He has a morphine patch on anyway for his osteoarthritis (he really has suffered in so many ways) and he's on iv paracetamol which seems to suit him.

I am glad he isn't in pain. That would be unbearable for both you and your dear dad. This time must be so awful for you. What awful luck that your dad has had to suffer ,not just one illness but several. Thinking of you.

Lin....this thread is my special place
IV paracetamol is a very good painkiller ime.

Mine too badvoc it's a thread where everyone understands everyone else , especially when RL folks just don't get it.

I agree badders about the paracetamol. Seems to work really well on him without turning him into a zombie. That said, he's fading fast. Getting weaker by the hour and we just can't get on top of any of his multiple issues. Apart now from his heart, which has decided to spring into life and beat stronger than ever.

It's odd how that happens sometimes
I had a cousin with very very serious heart problems
He died at 27 from a brain haemorrhage- his damaged heart kept going for 20 mins after the switched the life support off....
I've also seen very ill elderly people with multiple health issues whose heart just keeps on going despite other organs failing
I guess the heart and brain are the last to go..
How hard for you
I hope you manage to get some sleep X

I hope you are doing okay trucking and managed to get some rest, mum was very distressed and we argued the case with the ward to keep her morphine going they were reluctant to keep giving more in case of overdosing but when we pulled in palliative care nurse as she said what would it matter when the end result would be the same rather than her being in pain and unable to get it across, they made us feel very cruel and even accused us of trying to stop her communicating it was hard so I'm glad that things are under control and peaceful.

How is everyone?

Hi SM hope your ok.
trucking I bet you are feeling exhausted. Are you going home at all or will you stay there again tonight ? I expect you are feeling quite torn at the moment, on one hand not wanting your dad to suffer. On the other you don't want this to be happening at all. Lots of conflicting emotions. I hope you have had someone to visit today, just to break it up a little bit for you. Hopefully you will be able to get some sleep again tonight. What have the hospital said about your dads heart ?

I am okay ml, keeping busy how about you?

I've just come home and collapsed into bed. I'm on my knees. They turned the monitor screens off earlier, as his heart is beating strong enough now to not have to monitor it. A friend came today to keep me company for a while. I'm going to get a bit of rest now and then go back early.

I'm ok SM , just getting over a bad cold and chest infection. Now trying to get my house straight as my Ds has finally moved out as his house is done. I miss him being around though , but have to admit I will be glad when all his stuff is gone and I can get our own things back in place !! Give it a few months and I'm sure he will be back as sometime this year they will probably sell it and get another ! Nice for them all to be back as a family instead of being all over the place.

Trucking I hope you get a really good sleep and feel able to face tomorrow. I think it's very tiring being in a hospital all day, even though you aren't doing anything physical.i think it's the emotional strain.