Christmas hope - our safe haven thread for bereaved parents.

[shabbapinkfrog]

Hope....for the bereaved parent; even at Christmas, one of the most painful times of the year, there is an essence of hope. Hope....it is hope that sustains us through the days of grief and anger and frustration and loneliness.

The hope that someday the pain of the deaths of our children will be eased. The hope that someday our smiles will be real.

So, it is that for each of you I would hope....peace, compassion, love, sympathy, understanding, sharing and listening. In the sharing of our grief with one another, and in the emotional support we give to one another, we receive and understand all of these gifts.

Remembering my precious sons....and all of your precious children at this difficult time of year.

Morning ladies xx

afternoon ladies xx
nothing to report, just checking in!

morning girlsxx and glad you had a good time lavandes,bet hes so lovely xxx

Bit late there with your "morning", hazy!

Hiya Hazy - hows tricks love? xx

ooh, everyone is back! Shall we have a little welcome home party?

Something quite special... I think I mentioned Mia's lantern of love which glowed and flew away late late year, a very special evening. Well, yesterday my DH found a burnt-out lantern in the middle of the very playground, 10 miles away, which has been offered to us to rename on Mia's behalf. He looked on a map, and somehow assessed the wind direction (I have no idea on compasses, etc) and it turns out that it is directly in line with our house... he is not in the least romantic in that way, but he firmly believes it is Mia's lantern. She decided to visit her playground!!

I'm with your DH mia - I think she definitely visited her playground. How wonderful that a playground is being named after her - I'm sure you are so so proud.

Ladies, I would like to put something to you. I have had a childrens fairy story brewing in my head for a few years and am going to actually write it when I can get over my facebook scrabble addiction! Sylvie-Rose is going to be a fairy in it. Does anyone else want a fairy named for their dd/ds? Only I sort of "see" all our children playing together and would like to include them.
BTW the premise will be that fairyland is a sort of heaven for children until their parents come for them which I'm hoping will be clear to parents reading the story but not so much to the children IYKWIM.

chip, that is an amazing idea! How lovely. It sounds beautiful. Lots of mischievous little fairies!! And also, quite coincidental... I am seriously thinking of writing a children's book about Mia, with my DH doing the illustrations - mainly because of encouragement from other MNers on my thread. For me, its a positive way to keep her alive in my heart. And if it did work out, I was then going to offer you all to write a book about each of your beautiful children, so some of the particularly special things you remember / hoped for them could be captured and enjoyed by your families and hopefully by children we don't even know...

Morning girls xx

Oh Chip I think that sounds a lovely idea

Morning all xx

chip that sounds like a really lovely idea , and Mias mummy too x

Miasmummy, how lovely to write a story about Mia. I have had my story in my head for years and started it so many times but never got past two chapters. But I think I have more reason to write it now. Is your dh an artist? My sister is a brilliant artist,went to art college and does fantastic batiks, but sadly found there wasn't much money in art and has ended up working in social services. Not that social services is a bad thing BTW! She is very good at what she does but I do feel she is wasting her talent. I hadn't thought about illustrating my book but would actually like her to do it and maybe get her back into doing some art.

So if you would like your dd/ds named as a fairy, PM me and I will add their name to the list. I don't want to add anyone without permission and if no-one wants their dc named in the story, that's fine. I won't add anyone who doesn't pm me.

Ladies, the most amazing thing this morning! I was standing at the back door in my dressing gown and slippers this morning, throwing bread out to the birds when just in front of me, I saw something tiny and white floating down to the ground in the middle of the lawn and just landing gently on the grass. I went out in my slippers ( yuck, wet slippers!) and picked it up and it was the tiniest, whitest, fluffiest little feather! I had heard about people getting angel feathers from their loved ones but had never got one so far and thought maybe Sylvie-Rose didn't specialise in signs like that but I'm sure it was a sign from her. I have put it in her little memory box.

Oh Chip that's so lovely. I love little signs like that. We had the most beautiful red admiral butterfly fluttering around the garden on Christmas Day. I said to DH that's Erin letting us know she is with us today. Even he couldn't explain what a butterfly was doing out in the middle of December!

Morning girls xx

Morning ladies xx

Whatever that is so wonderful! I have never seen a butterfly in December and for him to be outdoors is astonishing!

Many thanks my friends for the welcome back.I think the trip has done me good. I have had the first peaceful sleeps since Richard died. That alone is so much to be grateful for as I thought it would never happen. xxx

lavandes I am so glad for you. Same for me. It was such a relief to finally have some peace, even if only for a while.

chip and whatever you encourage me with your beautiful signs of your girls. We hung Mia's copper leaf in the kitchen today.

Just a hard day today. Very sad. We packed up Mia's cot, books and changing table. The room feels so empty now. I feel my life is slipping back to what it was before she burst into our lives, and I just hate it. I am her mummy, and it feels invisible on the outside, but we are changed forever...

sorry, I meant everlong with your little robin!

Mias, I still have Sylvie-Rose's Moses basket in our room but what we are going to do is buy this cabinet and put a few of her little things and photos on it and have it in our room.

Morning girls xx Freeeeeeeeeeeeeezing cold here in Lancashire!!