Smacking! At what age do people thinking it's appropriate

[AlanasMum]

I was at coffee morning the other day and my 15m dd was playing up a little. Another mum commented and said wow I bet she gets a lot of smacks. I must have looked a bit shocked as it hadn't occured to me to smack dd before.

I've always been on the fence on this subject and figured I'd cross that bridge when I came to it. Which appears to be coming quicker than I anticipated.

For me personally, I don't think any age is appropriate for smacking. My DD is almost 5 and never been smacked and I don't intend to start now. Doesn't mean she has never played up or been naughty though.

However, a 15 month old is still very much a baby and doesn't have the understanding and comprehension to be truely naughty - way too young for such discipline.

never.

Why would someone make an assumption like that? I would have told her to keep her gob shut, cheeky cow!

That's a very rude and upsetting comment. I would have looked more than shocked if someone said that to me.

Never. EVER.

I don't think it's ever appropriate. Never. And certainly not a baby of 15 months old.

There are better ways of maintaining discipline, imo.

I don't agree with smacking at any age (although I was smacked occasionally as a child and, in fact, it did not leave any psychological scars that I am aware of)

I just think that there are plenty of ways to discipline a child without resorting to physical reprimands. I think it is particulary important not to be hypocritical as well, and I tell my ds (2.3) that hitting, pinching etc is bad behaviour and give him time-outs when he does hit, so I think he would be very confused if I told him it was bad behaviour except when mummy does it.

Lots of people (who hit) think that it's ok to hit 15-month-olds.

Thing is, if it's ok from a particular age, does that mean it's ok to hit adults?

I've always been against smacking - it doesn't feel right. And smacking a child of this age doesn't work - they don't understand. I have a 3 year old and a 17mth old.

I've been on mumsnet for support when I was beginning to feel that a smack on the hand for my 17mth old was a last resort (he is a strong-willed terror) and was glad for the sane response I got saying don't do it.

As your baby gets older and gains more reason and understanding of consequence, you will find methods of discipline that don't involve smacking, and smacking will seem so pointless and unproductive in achieving the behaviour you want.

If she had made that remark with reference to my baby, I would have offered pleasantly to rip her ugly head off and shit down her scrawny neck.

*@$£!

Greenshots that made me laugh

never

Greeny is this some new fruitshoot related name? What are you up to?

I also don't agree with smacking children at all, sends out the wrong messages as if it's ok to smack them then why shouldn't they smack others? Also think there are much better ways to deal with things than by smacking. I was smacked as a child and it did affect me.

Oh heck, another one who doesn't "get" my wonderful Easter/Spring-themed name

It's about CROCUSES and other spring flowers, you bunch of wittols!! Green shoots = spring? No?

I would have been very upset that this woman was commenting on my childs behaviour as though it was abnormal!
Do you think this woman smacks her child? I just find it a really odd thing to say.

Totally agree with Greeny,

You don't smack a baby or child or anyone! I couldnt have resisted giving her one though!

God the woman was obviously thick.

A spring name??? Good god woman I haven't thought of a Christmas name yet

haven't you got some lentils to be washing, or something?

I don't think there's an age, I think it depends on the child. My kids have never needed to be smacked, there's always something else that works before smacking even enters my mind. But I know there are kids out there who are far more stubborn than mine.

Never.

Am at someone saying that re a 15mo.

I'd want to smack her, actually.

i was thinking about this the other day - i have to confess i slapped my 2 yr olds hand after the 3rd 'isn't it funny to put my hands in my pooey nappy' - i've made a vow to myself never ever to do that again - it didn't work [button down vest did], but more importantly i read about the mums being arrested who filmed their babies being forced to fight - and couldn't really see how i was being that different - morally mixed messages and violent

luckylady, i also had to use the button down vest to stop my ds1 taking his nappy off constantly. Then they work out how to take that off. Thank god for dungarees!

I dont like smacking at all. however, having said that i have ds 2.2 around the legs twice for delierately kicking me in the face. not a hard wallop, but enough to shock him and know not to do it. He hasn't done it since the second time so it must of worked