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Original poster

FUNNY THINGS THAT KIDS SAY.......(or is it just my kids...?)

370 replies

Nikki74 · 08/09/2006 11:11

Hi All,
I'm really new to mumsnet - I've got 3 children and have only just stumbled across it - I've obviously been missing out!!
Anyway, I just thought I would share this with you :- yesterday my 7 yr old daughter came home from school and told me that they had to draw a picture of Henry ville. 'Henry Ville??' I asked - 'I've never heard of him'. 'Well' she said, 'He's a very famous person in history'. I thought for a moment and suddenly it clicked 'Do you mean Henry VIII?'
It turned out to be Henry VIII after all, but she'd obviously read the roman numerals as 'vill' - bless her! It was so funny!

Also, a my eldest daughter (who was 3 at the time) was playing on our front lawn with next doors 3yr old son whilst I was pruning the rosebush (ok....yanking out a few weeds). There was a bit of a heated discussion going on which basically consisted of my daughter saying 'I DO' and next doors son shouting back 'NO YOU DON'T'. After a few minutes my daughter stomped over to me and said 'Mummy, Dean says that girls don't have willies, but they do cos I've got a red pair' - Needless to say - she was referring to her new, shiny WELLIES!!!!

Anyone elses children come out with any amusing little jems?

Bye for now,
Nikki
x

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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SoMuchToBits · 15/09/2006 17:34

When ds was about 2 or 3 we were getting changed at the swimming pool, and he suddenly said in a very loud voice "Mummy, you haven't got a willy!"

Also he used to call balloons "boonalloons".

The other week we went to stay with my sister in Brighton, and he asked "Do people in Brighton speak English?"

nixnoo · 15/09/2006 18:09

when I was little my mom took me to a weight watchers class. Apparentlt one woman walked in an dI said (loudly) "Look, mommy, that lady is so nig she needs TWO chairs!"
I like to this I helped her achieve her target weight?

Also, my cousin was born in Southern Africa during a drought. Nobody realised that it just so happened that when it did rain he was asleep. So oneday, when he was aged about 3, my aunt found him standing in the kitchen doorwat just gazing up at the rain, and asked him if he was OK. His answer:
Mommy, the stars are wee-weeing!

ahhhhh bless!

nixnoo · 15/09/2006 18:10

"that lady is so BIG" is what I meant to say...

1 handed typing while BF!

squidgeymiller · 15/09/2006 21:48

my sister used to say the telephone was ringing in her feet when she had pins and needles, also apparently asked at g'mas 80th birthday family dinner "mummy, where's lesbia?". When I was born my Dad phoned to tell my sister and told her what I'd been named, to which my sister replied "Walrus, you can't call a baby Walrus!" needless to say that's not what they'd called me, but I did get called that quite a lot from then on!

kid · 15/09/2006 22:05

DS reported after his first day in Reception 'I didn't like it today, they made me do work!'
I did break it to him gently that thats what they do in Reception!

zephyrcat · 15/09/2006 22:10

My DD id currently telling everyone that we've been looking at photos of PikeyPorns [grin

(porcupines, of course

trefusis · 15/09/2006 22:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

imaginaryfriend · 15/09/2006 22:32

I love these stories!

One of my fondest of dd was in the bath when she was about 3. We were about to brush her teeth and she said 'we have to do it very well so I don't have to grow horse teeth'. After much questioning and lateral thinking I worked out she meant false teeth!

Sugarmagnolia · 16/09/2006 10:05

DS had a toy watch on yesterday and pointing to the 12 said "look mummy, my watch has a 1 and 2" So I asked him if he knew what number that was when you had a 1 and 2 together. He's only 3 so I didn't really expect him to know. But he seemed to be thinking about it very carefully. Finally, after quite a long wait, he says hopefully, "Thursday"?

MamaG · 16/09/2006 10:21

The other day, DD asked me if I could play a musical instrument. I told her I used to play the keyboard when I was a little girl to which she replied "oh, did they have keyboards when you were little?"

Cheers DD.

Also, DD to her old nursery teacher, when she was in reception. "No, you can't look at my new baby brother because you're the horriblest teacher in the school"

Me - DD! Thats not very nice!

DD - you said to Daddy that she was nasty...

bakedpotato · 17/09/2006 19:53

DD is just going into reception. Today she told us all about the 'head mischief'

Peridot30 · 17/09/2006 20:02

we were in burger king the other wk and ds age 4 took sesame seeds off burger bun. i asked him what he was doing and he said he was taking them home to plant them to grow more burger buns!!!! ROFL Hubbie and i were crying with laughter!!

wrinklytum · 17/09/2006 20:03

Was watching "The Blue Planet" with ds today and it had the luminous jellyfish that use biophosphorescence and light up in different colours."Look at the jellyfish,its got flashing lights" I say to ds.He turns to me and goes "Mummy is it a rescue jellyfish ?".

Sugarmagnolia · 19/09/2006 07:02

Another one from DS -

DS - We were playing mummys & daddys

Me - Oh, and who were you? Were you the daddy?

DS - (scornfully)No! I was the superhero!

(As if I should really have known!)

Raggydoll · 19/09/2006 07:38

when ds was about 2 he became really wary of our understairs cupboard and would not go near it - the penny finally dropped that we keep the cleaning stuff in there, including the 'iron' only poor ds thought we had a 'lion' in the cupboard, bless

arfishymeau · 19/09/2006 08:41

LOL at rescue jellyfish! Love all of these.

DD looks very sweet and topped off the angelic 3 year old appearance this morning by exhorting the cat - 'KILL! Fluffy! KILL!' at full volume at 6am in our back garden. (Neighbours love us ).

YeahBut · 19/09/2006 09:13

dd1 is quite keen to have more brothers and sisters and told me I could save myself some time by having 'six tablets". Very confused look from me until the penny dropped - sextuplets!!

queenceleste · 19/09/2006 09:33

my ds this week:
"Mummy this peanut looks like buttocks!"

Jaffacake1 · 19/09/2006 09:38

My best friend is a reception teacher...

a worried mum came in to see her a few weeks ago.
She said, 'my daughter says that you were talking about when you used to be a pole dancer, and I am not happy you are discussing that sort of thing...she says you made all of the children watch a pole dancing video'

My friend was horrified..but soon realised this stemmed from the nice video of her 'maypole' dancing that the had taken in to show the children...

justamum · 19/09/2006 15:20

rofl jaffacake! thats brilliant.
dh has taught ds "high five" but he keeps running around saying "give me pie five mummy"

JackieNo · 19/09/2006 15:24

DS does high five too, but he and DD also do it with both hands, which is of course 'high ten'.

Peridot30 · 19/09/2006 19:19

laughing at sugarmagnolia. When you ask dd who i am she says mummy but when you ask her who daddy is she says superman! Guess who told her that my dh has such a high opinion of himself!!

Bodkin · 19/09/2006 20:32

My DD (2.9) is under the impression that the lovable bear created by AA Milne and best friend to Christopher Robin is called "We need a poo"

Also, during the summer, we were on the beach and she was digging frantically in the sand as if searching for something. I asked her what she had lost, and she replied "um, um... (long pause)..the plot, mummy"

dreamcatcher · 19/09/2006 21:28

I've read this entire thread and my ribs are aching!
Couple of gems-
I still get reminded of the time 30+ years ago when i asked my uncle 'is auntie Jo's hypochondria better yet?'
I took my godson to the farm with me to turn out my sisters horse. The farmer took him for a tour while i was busy. Got him back to his mum,when asked what he'd done he said 'the farmer took me behind the barn and showed me his bollocks'.
(bullocks). tell that to SS!

justamum · 19/09/2006 21:55

My ds was telling my mum about a friend who has broken her leg
ds: Aunty Vonnie has a bad leg
mum: really, oh dear
ds: I fink Uncle Graham bit it!